MY DAREDEVIL EDDIE 😍🥰🥰

oh my fucking god

if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.

the 911 campaign to promote their fake dead bobby storyline is insane, y’all. like, okay, i understand the interviews and making the actors write “goodbye” posts on their socials. but i think that killing the pope for it is taking it a step too far…

TIM?????????? WHEN HE WAS JUST ABOUT TO HAVE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FOR THE FIRST TIME????? NOOOOOOOOO :((((

someone tell me when they’re filming on location next!! i’ll work a trip to LA just to go see them im deadass

you might be tempted to think that you’re so so so so excited for buddie canon that you’re the most excited person in the whole world. WRONG!!! oliver stark is the most excited person in the world for buddie canon!!!!

apparently there are people who think buck needed to be comforted after the last episode. not me tho. i think they should make him worse

two things i think are REQUIRED for a buck and eddie getting together arc:

eddie has to choose buck. this is necessary character development for both of them (and also for me because otherwise this will be my supervillain origin story). eddie needs to choose something that will make him happy rather than denying himself habitually as punishment, and he needs to admit what he wants. buck needs to be shown that he's wanted, that not only has eddie chosen him specifically but eddie knows him better than anyone else in the world and has seen him at his worst and loves him for it. he doesn't need to be on his best behavior for eddie, ever.

after they kiss buck needs to freak the fuck out and run to maddie or hen or bobby and go "I KISSED EDDIE. I AM A MONSTER. JAIL FOR BUCK FOR ONE THOUSAND YEARS" and then when they make him go through the sequence of events that actually happened they're like "uhhhh it sounds like he kissed you, bud. did you just blank on the whole part where he said he loves you and tenderly caressed your face?" but buck is still breathing into a paper bag.

bonus requirement: eddie needs to kiss buck's birthmark.

Chim, struggling with a recipe: Eddie, can you Google how many ounces are in a cup? My hands are covered in flour.

Eddie: Sure, one sec. Buck!

Buck: Yeah?

Eddie: How many ounces are in a cup?

Buck: Eight.

Eddie: Thank you.

Chim: Now, what the hell was that?

Eddie: Six years, Chim. Haven't had to Google a thing.

Chim: Mmhm, why don't you ask Buck what the definition of codependency is next?