Me, Drinking Pineapple Juice: I Wonder Who Had The Idea To Put Pineapple Juice In Drinkable Cans My Sister,

izzy isn’t homophobic

he’s whorephobic

they had the perfect opportunity to have benedict cumberbatch as doctor strange say “no shit, sherlock”, but they had him say “no shit, genius” instead. i’m appalled.

istg i absolutely guzzle orange juice like my bard drowning himself in ‘the best beer in town’ during a long rest after five hours of combat stumbling out of a tavern after he lost his banjo ready to collapse.

guys we fucking did it

i have horrible object permanence so i forget about a lot of things. and every once in a while i get reminded that markiplier exists and i’m at peace for a moment.

anyway stream distractible on spotify and apple music…

riz in fabian’s letterman jacket. that he didn’t get for being on the team. ig it fits riz better since he’s on the team. being the ball and all

i bet bad kids sleepovers fucking rule

(click for better quality!)

some fun details:

Here’s the thing about human nature:

Think about things you know. Think about the things that live in your head, that got encoded into your memory without being learned.

My parents will get on YouTube and look at compilations of Top 80’s Songs and sing verses of every last one. They quote SNL skits that aired 20 years ago.

People in my generation quote Vines the same way. We know jingles from infomercials we haven’t seen in over a decade. It’s been months and I still find the words humming in my head, Turtleneck and blazer, on point like a laser…

I can sing songs I never intentionally listened to. It’s going down, I’m yelling Timber tumbles through my head without me knowing where it’s from. As an adult, I looked up “apologize” on youtube because of a vivid memory of being in the dentist’s chair as a child and hearing, It’s too late to apologize, it’s too late… I have always instinctively known that Boots with the fur follows Apple bottom jeans.

I can’t hear “What do you want” without the overwhelming urge to say “I want to sing and dance!” because of a Ray Stevens song. I can’t hear “What does the fox say?” without feeling something. I dare not say “Dumb ways to die” in front of my siblings.

Did you ever sit down and intentionally memorize the lyrics to Bohemian Rhapsody? Were you ever a fan of Owl City or do you just know that “You would not believe your eyes” is followed by “If ten million fireflies?”

Why do mnemonics work on us? How often do you say to yourself, “Thirty days hath September” or sing the ABC’s to yourself quietly? My dad told me, “If red touches black, he’s a friend of Jack, but if red touches yellow, he can kill a fellow” and I remember it. I can count by threes without thinking about it because of a video I had in elementary school. I can sing the alphabet in Greek and in Spanish because I listened to alphabet songs for them. I still know Be, am, is, are, was, being, have, has, had, could, would, should, may, might, must, shall, can, will, do, did, does, having are almost all English “helping verbs” because of a video I watched in high school. The only reason I know anacondas are found in Ecuador is because of a CollegeHumor parody of Nicki Minaj’s song Anaconda.

Study advice tells you to make up rhymes to memorize information. Commercials have jingles and slogans and rhythmic phrases because we automatically memorize them. It’s batshit that “make a mnemonic” is standard advice for students. How is that not harder than just remembering?

You know what follows “Hey diddle diddle,” but why? You can probably name most, if not all, of Santa’s reindeer. You know what Superman can leap in a single bound whether or not you’ve ever given a shit about Superman. You know “Ring around the rosie” is followed by “Pocket full of posies.”

I posted about this a while back, but you know that song about murdering Barney that you or your siblings used to sing? That song has been sung for over 30 years. Across multiple continents. There’s a tree of variants based on the same basic theme, There’s even multiple versions in Spanish based on the Spanish Barney theme song.

Where I can’t remember poems, there are little indents in my memory where their syllables should be. But I have multiple poems memorized that I never memorized on purpose.

You have definitely heard about how The Iliad is an epic poem. Before writing, everything was passed down orally. Everything. “How on earth did they do it?” people wonder, and bitch about how technology has ruined our memories, which is hilarious, because how they did it is obvious.

We are WIRED to memorize. If something rhymes or is rhythmic, our brains are terrifyingly good at making that shit last FOREVER. We can’t make it stop. “Damn it, I can’t get this song out of my head!” we will say. I have had this happen to me after hearing a song literally once.

Rhythm, rhyme, meter, the basic components of poetic structure, are VERY fundamental to how our memory works. Somehow. “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” is in trochaic meter. If it was “Teenage Mutant Samurai Turtles” it wouldn’t stick around the way it did. But if you sing it, it sticks around.

Why does this work?

Do you know anyone that never gets songs stuck in their head, that can’t remember jingles and poems and theme songs? Is there anyone you can think of that just…doesn’t have that lightbulb light up when you sing half of something they should remember? Dyslexia, aphantasia, prosopagnosia, disabilities where faculties we think of as “things brains do” are missing are pretty common, but are there humans that can’t do this?

It would be noticeably disabling. Imagine trying to memorize your ABC’s if you can’t sing them, even in your head.

Favorite genre of post

yk the ‘bury your gays’ trope where the writers kill off gay characters? great name. but what about ‘kill your queers’. it’s so bad and it just sounds like a hate crime but like. the alliteration is nice yk.

I had an idea for a Play

It’s Hamlet 

No Stage, just a bunch of chairs and props scattered around the room, audience sits wherever they want 

A Disclaimer is given at the beginning of the play: “There Will Be Blood, and Audicence paticipation.”   “You will be expected to stand up and yell “STOP!”.”   “You’ll know when.”

Play continues as normal, but maybe with a little more Verve than usual 

Just let the actors be Real Unhinged 

Make it clear somewhere in the second act, that the actors aren’t pulling thier punches- 

Those are REAL broken noses, that’s REAL blood on the floor and those swords sure as hell aren’t blunted 

HOPEFULLY someone in the audience stands up and yells “STOP” before rosencrantz and Guildenstern are killed on stage 

From that point on, the play is Improv 

Whoever stands up is treated by the actors like another character in the play- Hamlet will try to convince them to aid his cause, Polonius to get them to Kill Hamlet, Ophelia to get her the hell out of there etc. 

The Doors Are Locked

Efforts to make them break character will be ignored, they can only be reasoned with “In Character" 

It is now up to the Audience to try and stop The Tragedy. 

 This is a terrible thearer production, a great horror movie or a fantastic prank on theater critics.

Okay, don't get me wrong here. I LOVE Jurassic Park. I love seeing their dinosaurs. But after watching Prehistoric Planet, and going back to look at this...

And then looking at this...

Notice how much healthier the second set looks? Their lips cover their teeth, they actually have fat on their bodies, their skin doesn't wrinkle like they're dehydrated. You can't see every single tendon and muscle move because you aren't supposed to. Dinosaurs are animals, not reptilian body-builders.

THIS is the kind of change I want to see in how we create realistic depictions of not only dinosaurs, but all prehistoric creatures. Paleoart has always had a huge issue with shrink-wrapping and making these animals look terrifying instead of making them look like, well, animals.

Well done, BBC.