When Stan Is In An Uber He Acts Like He’s In A Psychological Saw Trap. He Scrolls Back And Forth On

when stan is in an uber he acts like he’s in a psychological saw trap. he scrolls back and forth on his home screen acting like he’s busy, texting kenny random keysmashes to pretend he’s having a real human conversation. he’s squirming in his chair and bopping his head to the music and the driver asks if he likes the song and stan says it’s his favorite even though he’s never heard the song in his life. the driver asks how he’s doing and stan goes “living the dream, boss!” despite never having said this string of words all at once in his life but he panicked.

kenny, on the other hand, is the person who hops in the passenger seat of the uber. he asks for aux and fiddles with the ac like it’s nothing. he places his hand on the uber driver’s thigh and stares at him. sometimes the uber driver places his hand nervously over kenny’s. they ride quietly and tenderly until kenny reaches the abortion clinic that he’s meeting a hookup from a couple weeks ago at and kenny gets out of the car, but not before placing his hand on the driver’s cheek and whispering: “maybe in another life, anthony:” they both give each other 5 stars.