Small Cryptogriff Rant

im going with number 5 yolo

Take a seat

Haven't made a Slugterra meme with the main characters yet so I had to lock in

Has anyone else ever wondered what the music in Slugterra is like? is it almost identical to ours or is it like "listening to those remixes that are intentionally made to be bad but for them it's normal" kind of difference. Considering the technology Slugterra has I wouldn't be surprised if they had something similar to Vocaloid (at least in terms of the virtual idol concerts)

Either that or the Vocaloids are straight up real people in Slugterra

I couldn't think of a caption for this one

this image has been sitting on my PC for far too long I gotta subject the rest of yall to it

Warning: excessive use of capital letters

Yall we have got to talk more about what happened to Blakk after his second Deep Caverns visit because WHAT THE FLOP HAPPENED TO HIM

DID HE DRINK THE DARK WATER OR SOMETHING LIKE THE EMPEROR WENT SWIMMING IN THAT STUFF BUT IT WAS NEVER THIS BAD

like holy guacamole that transformation looks like it hurt. his arms have SPIKES GROWING OUT OF THEM not to mention his left hand is MISSING A FINGER

like did the Goon or Brimstone get a bit hungry and eat it before his transformation? WHERE DID IT GO

Props to Blakk for always having fabulous eyeliner even when he's been horribly mutated

This has been a certified WildSpectre rant

the fact that I watched both Ninjago and Slugterra when I was younger and never made the connection that these characters had the same VA is kinda baffling tbh

I like Dr. Blakk but...

"the truth is, in this life... we only have ourselves" - Dr. Blakk in Back to Blakk

Hey Dr. Blakk a word of advice, maybe you would have more friends if you stopped being mean to all of your allies for no reason.

like broski, maybe if the primary motivator for all of your allies (not just the people you hire) wasn't fear you would have more people stick around until the end other than Maurice and Nacho (and Maurice didn't even join the final fight against the Shane Gang)

Examples:

Locke, Lode, John Bull, and C.C only want to bust Blakk out of Stalagmite 17 for the rewards.

Throws Quintin out of the Titan in Upgrade for basically no reason.

Sends Nacho to the deep caverns for basically no reason in The New Kid part 2.

Calls Mr. Saturday's mind control "mind control foolishness" after he CAPTURED THE SHANE GANG and TOOK OVER THE MOST ESCAPE PROOF PRISON IN ALL OF SLUGTERRA like my brother in Brimstone is it THAT hard to go ONE CONVERSATION without insulting someone.

there are probably several more examples of this that I can't remember off the top of my head.

I understand that he is the main antagonist but being this mean to your own comrades is just bad strategy dude.

Blakk's now probably ex-allies might not be 100% sure he's alive but the things they probably say about him in their totally real group chat must be legendary

this has been a certified WildSpectre rant

SATURDAY HEADCANNONS RAAAHHH (might steal some of these)

SHANE GANG BLAKK INDUSTRIES - HEADCANNONS #3 : Uh, this is a Wendy's? [Edition]

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☆ Part 1 ☆ Part 2

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There is a group chat for all the highered Slingers. And no, it is in no way professional.

Everyone has stupid Users and the chat name changes at least five times a day on average.

There is a group chat for the regular day to day workers, but it's far more casual and general updates.

Twist is an annoying little shit.

^Constant bragging about being 'Blakk's apprentice'

C.C. loves to rub it in Twist's face Blakk picked him for the mission in 'Lightwell'

Everyone dogs on Saturday for falling for Eli's bluff in 'Mission Improbable'

Saturday retaliates by hypnotizing them for a while until Blakk tells him to stop.

Everyone loves Maurice

I don't care Maurice is the best and everyone(Blakk included) would kill for the man

Maurice is the only one able to even be able to talk some level of sense into Blakk

It is no secret that our of everyone in Blakk Industries, Blakk trusts Maurice the most, seeing as how Blakk is actually nice to him(though its probably because they have known each other for years)

Locke and Lode are actually smarter than people give them credit for, they just just bicker so much that they tend to forget what's going on around them.

Blakk, is a feminist, interpret that as you will

When Sedo approached Blakk to work for him, he promised that once he became King of Molemound Blakk could do whatever he wanted.

Twist sometimes has, regrets, about working for Blakk but then remembers how he used to live

^he sometimes has dream about what life would have been like if he hadn't double crossed the Shane Gang

There had been, hundreds of jokes in regards to El Diablos Nacho and his name

none are said in ear shot because no one wants to die :)

Quintin drank way to much coffee and had so little sleep while developing the Titan Tanks

Blakk Industries is surprisingly inclusive for a company run by an eco terrorist

Billy and the rest of the Hooligang are annoying little shits, but in the endearing way

Billy and Twist hate each other

NO ONE TRUSTED THE DARK BANE NOT EVEN BLAKK HIMSELF

A lot of the staff are huge SlugBall fans

So when Primo Presto started on the pay roll they were psyched because they could get SlugBall tickets for an even cheepier price

^Blakk Industries sells tickets for various events at a reduced price to its employees to help with moral (for the record, this is a legit thing companies can do, my mom's company dose it)

say what you will, the cafeteria serves good food

Not everyone working there agrees with the Ghouling but some people just really need the money

Since Eli Shane happened, there have been prank calls coming in

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"Blakk Industries, Bringing you Tomorrow's Yesterday Today, My name is Steve, how can I help you?"

"So you sell Ligma?"

"... Ligma? whats Ligma I-"

"LIGMA BALLS" [hangs up]

"... what the fu-"

☆

"Blakk Industries, Bringing you Tomorrow's Yesterday Today, My name is Camron, how can I help you?"

[Caller starts trauma dumping]

"... uh... this is a corporate manufacturing company-"

☆

"Blakk Industries, Bringing you Tomorrow's Yesterday Today, My name is Aaron, how can I help you?"

[Caller proceeds to spend four and a half hours on the phone, making a custom order for like 1000+ gold Mecha]

"Alright sir, is that everything?"

"yup"

"perfect! be for I submit your request, as per Blakk Industries policy-"

"wait- Blakk Industries? I thought I was talking to someone form the Beast Forge! agh! never mind-"[hangs up]

"... SO I DID ALL THAT FOR NOTHING!?!? @#%$!"

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No one is paid enough to deal with it lmao

They host parties ranging form birthday parties for employees to grand gala's

^Clearly inspired by the Blakk Gala community event

There was a debate on weather or not to fish Blite out of the Cavern of Time

It was ultimately a no

Darius (the guy posing as the head of the Beast Forge that one ep) knows nothing about Mecha Beast's

Blakk attempted to bribe Judge Logan once before Blakk Industries really took off, Blakk ended up working hard labour for six months until Maurice came to get him

Twist is actually friends with an Arachnoid, don't ask how, it just happened.

Viggo Dare did try to get his 'gang' back from Blakk once.

Viggo Dare was never seen leaving Blakk's office.

Ngl I feel like one thing that would have been really fun to see in Slugterra post-Blakk downfall would be the slingers he hired working with each other or characters outside of Blakk Industries.

like for example: after some hijinx ensue maybe Twist accidentally gets dragged into joining the Scrap Force or Sedo and Saturday team up to try (and fail) to get revenge on Pronto.