Fuck Your Dreams!

“Let today be the day you love yourself enough to no longer just dream of a better life; let it be the day you act upon it.”

— Steve Maraboli

When thinking about life,

Remember this:

No amount of guilt can change the past

And no amount of anxiety can change the future.

How do you stay motivated?

Motivation is a fickle bitch. Don’t expect motivation. You don’t stay motivated; you work through the periods of exhaustion and disinterest with relentless discipline and enjoy the moments of motivation when they come, ride the wave, and then struggle through the depths again.

(Habit, not motivation, should be your best friend. Routine, persistence, patience.)

Studying is so unnecessarily hated, so can just appreciate the sheer aesthetic of studying?

Waking up early and drinking green tea with textbooks on your lap as light spills in through the open windows. Laying out post-its and notebooks and coloured pens as you begin to write colour coordinated notes for each subject. Having textbooks and notebooks spread out all over your desk with your laptop in the center, as you make powerpoint presentations for each chapter. The feeling of scribbling down formulae that you pin up all over your walls, creating a colourful display of knowledge in your room. Having a binder filled to the brim with detailed diagrams with annotations and post-its all over them.

And if you’re chaotic and messy and disorganised? That’s equally aesthetic!

Having pinned your hair up in a messy bun as you sit on the floor, surrounded by open binders that have pages upon pages of notes spilling out of them. Sticking your pencil through that bun because you can’t find your rubber band and then cursing two minutes later because where is my pencil it was right here. Piles of used coffee cups and plates from the hundreds of different snacks that have just piled up in your room. Messy diagrams sellotaped to the bookshelves because you can’t find any of your notebooks. Random pieces of information scribbled on the cuff of your jeans because there’s no more space on your arms and you can’t find a spare bit of paper. That one page of notes that you made that was actually informative and organised before it trailed off into three pages of doodles.

Studying is aesthetic. And the aesthetic of studying is a fucking great motivator to start doing it.

Wise things my sister has told me (friendship edition)

You hurt so much in friendships because you are more invested in it than they are or they care to be. Not everyone considers friendship to be such a precious and important relationship in their life and you need to be aware of that before you open your heart to people. 

When someone is being vulnerable with you, it says more about you than it does about them. It shows that you make them feel comfortable and like it’s a safe space and that you will not judge them or go around spreading rumours. They trust you. Because you are a trustworthy and emotionally mature person. 

You don’t need to have a huge showdown sort of confrontation with someone before deciding to distance yourself from them. You can decide that in your own head. Since you are neither ghosting them nor turning on them, you are not required to talk it out. You are simply toning down your affection towards them because now you see them for who they are. 

You need more people in your life who see you as an equal. And that can only happen when they are not so severely insecure. Insecurity comes out in two ways. One, where they put you down, are cocky and entitled and selfish. They think they are better than you. These are commonly recognized as narcissistic traits. But the second way is less known. It is when they are low on self-confidence and compare everything you do with what they do and then secretly try to copy that and never even acknowledge it. It is when they try to suck you dry, take everything they can from you to become ‘better’ and then pretend like you don’t exist. 

Constantly reminding that this body is fighting for you to be alive.

Stop belittling yourself.

Do we actually like working or just receiving the money?

Red Cantonese bear dog

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