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Akaashi X Reader Angst - Blog Posts
akaashi cheater au :( with the song rose by jereena montemayor pls pls make it super angsty 🥺🥺
Rose of Thorns (Akaashi x Reader)
*GIF not mine*
Summary: Akaashi was much like a rose. He was beautiful, soft and enchanting. But he also had many undeniable thorns. (Based on “Rose” by Jereena Montemayor)
A/N: I’m really sorry I waited so long on this request!! I just haven’t been in the mood to write angst in a while, but I swear I’m working on it! Also, I should’ve focused on the cheating aspect in this fic, but eh. I tried. Mega angst, so watch out. Side note: good lordy that song put me in my feels GODDAMN! Hope you like it!
Word count: 1285
You loved him.
You loved him so much.
But you knew what was happening too.
He was drifting away from you, bit by bit. Every day, he seemed a little more out of it with you. A little less passionate with his words. A little less adoring with his eyes.
They were filled with more guilt than anything.
Every time you kissed him, told him you loved him, hugged him after a long day, his responses always seemed a bit slower than the time before. He was slipping through your fingertips day by day, but you didn’t want to lose him.
It started with a kiss, as it always does.
Akaashi’s team won the game, and after lining up to shake the other team’s hand, Akaashi’s eyes skimmed the crowd. You were smiling and cheering and waving at him, but they didn’t reach you.
No, instead they stopped on another. She was beautiful too. Her hair looked softer than yours. Her legs were longer, more slim and toned. Her large eyes were enchanting as well, even you yourself could understand how one could get lost in them.
You didn’t know her name, all you knew was the pain that stabbed through your heart. Every beat seemed to drain you of life.
Oh.
Then Akaashi’s eyes finally drifted to you in the crowd, and the blue orbs were pouring with guilt as you made your way down to him.
Like normal, you hugged him and smiled, muttering a congratulations. But it was all lifeless and soft. He knew you had seen it, and his face seemed to twitch nervously.
Akaashi was always composed and calm, so maybe that was how he recovered from the shock so quickly. His hands soon cupped your cheeks, and a gentle, loving smile soon encompassed his face, causing you to instinctively relax and return the gesture.
He leaned in and pressed his lips to yours.
Oh God.
It hurt so much to feel how little passion was in it. By definition, it was a kiss, but you knew it was so much more. It was a brush of lips, so light and compulsory, like an obligation to keep up a lie.
“I love you.” The words tickled your lips thanks to his proximity. His thumbs caressed the tips of your cheeks gently while he leaned his forehead against yours and stared into your doting gaze.
“I love you too.”
~~~
A rose sat on your desk in your room. Homework laid forgotten underneath it, and you hugged your knees to your chest and wept.
Your eyes hadn’t left the flower once. Like Akaashi, it was beautiful, gentle and soft. But thorns ran along the stem like vicious pricks of reality.
He was the one who had given it to you too. After all, it was Valentine’s Day. But where was he?
Doing homework, stuck at practice with Bokuto, spending time with his family. Any number of the excuses he had texted you in the past few days.
God, I love him so much.
Of course you didn’t want to. Who wanted to be in love with a cheater?
With an outstretched hand, you shakily picked up the rose, careful to avoid the thorns. One pricked you anyways, no matter how much you thought you avoided it, but you only whimpered at the pain. You didn’t drop the rose.
You held it closer to your face, finding small waves of comfort in its flowery scent. The rose was alluring, spirals of petals enticing you to come closer, to embrace the soft touch of each blood red petal.
But at the end of the day, it was just a rose.
Your phone buzzed, but it was just one of your friends in a group chat. No, nobody was talking to you personally. Your boyfriend was somewhere else, with only the physical, basic show of affection left in your hands to remind you of him.
The screen lit up your dim bedroom and stung your bloodshot eyes. And the background picture came clearer as the notification finally faded.
It was you and Akaashi. You were draped over his shoulders with a large smile on your face, beaming like the sun. His eyes were rolling at the dramatic act, but a hint of a grin was displayed through an upturned corner of the mouth. Adoring. That’s what he was.
Was.
Gulping, you grasped the phone in one hand and opened it, entering your photos. All of it was there. Pictures from the beginning of your relationship all the way to the end were in albums, dating back a year.
You clicked on the very first one that held him.
Akaashi was holding a sign, his cheeks burning bright red. One of his arms was draped around your shoulders, and your own were wrapped around his waist in a tight hug. His gaze was locked on you, but you were smiling brightly at the camera. He had asked you to prom, and you distantly remember your first dance.
“You look gorgeous.”
You hadn’t felt like you did until that moment. Until that beautiful man himself looked you in the eyes and truthfully told you how captivating you were. Nobody had ever told you that before….
Pluck.
Tears trailed slowly down your cheeks as you slowly dropped the petal into the trash can beside you. Knees wobbling, you relocated to your bed and sat criss-crossed on the mattress. You set your phone in your lap and held the rose in your hands.
The bedroom was cold. You almost shivered, your tank top and sleeping shorts barely keeping you warm, but it almost didn’t bother you. At least, you weren’t distracted by it.
Your phone screen lit up your whole room with another picture as you swiped your finger along.
Akaashi was pecking your cheek while you hugged him tightly after winning a volleyball game.
Pluck.
Akaashi was kissing you in the rain after your one month anniversary. A new necklace glittered around your neck, the one currently sitting at the bottom of your trash bin.
Pluck.
Akaashi was trapping you tightly against his side, holding you under an umbrella and affectionately scolding you about not wearing warmer clothes. You were wearing his sweatshirt. The one that still sat in your closet, waiting to be washed even though you cherished the scent it held.
Pluck.
Akaashi was staring at you in amazement as you stepped down the stairs in a floor length dress. Heels made your legs seem endless, and they only appeared every couple steps thanks to a sultry cut on one side of the skirt. “I don’t deserve you, angel” he had mumbled against your lips.
Pluck.
Akaashi.
Pluck.
Akaashi.
Pluck.
Pluck.
Pluck.
*Are you sure you want to delete these 105 photos? This action cannot be undone.*
*105 photos deleted.*
Maroon petals littered your bed. You tossed the bare rose stem into the trash can, now only consisting of green thorns.
Your cheeks were damp and your eyes felt heavy and tired.
I loved him so much.
You only had one thing left to do.
You: We need to talk.
*Message sent*
uhh hi again 😅 im sorry for requesting again hdhd but is it ok to request another akaash papercrane au? where him and the reader are friends and akaashi believed that if he folds a thousand paper cranes the reader who is sick would get better but in the end when his wish came true his life was taken in exchange for his wish.
Paper Cranes (Akaashi x Reader)
*GIF not mine*
Summary: A thousand paper cranes led to one wish. Or at least that’s what the legend said. Akaashi never wanted or even minded if it was true. At least, not until you came along.
A/N: I’m just out here wondering why y’all wanna be hurt. Like wtf. Anyways, this bitch angsty. Like I seriously hope y’all cry at this, bc boy did I want to. So like, pls feel free to tell me if you did cry, bc then I would feel accomplished. Aight, hope y’all enjoy!
Word count: 3725
There was a… legend, of sorts.
If any one person could fold one thousand paper cranes, he or she would be granted a wish.
Akaashi had heard this story from his grandmother at a young age, and since then scoffed at the idea. What’s a wish gonna do? And why would he need one?
He never truly believed in fate, destiny, or any other mystical mumbo jumbos. At least not until he met you.
~~~
The swings are the loneliest place on the playground. Only one person can enjoy the ride at the time. If you have someone to push you, you only have a split second every time you swing back toward them to talk or laugh or enjoy each other’s companies.
Akaashi found himself there often. He was the quietest kid in his kindergarten class, and though his appearance did make him popular in crowds, he preferred the solitude of the swings.
The swings didn’t expect him to be funny. They didn’t expect him to be smart. They didn’t expect him to be perfect.
“Hey, can I swing with you?”
The swings didn’t- wait, what?
Akaashi slowed his back-and-forth swaying, lowering his dusty tennis shoes to the bark of the ground to observe who had spoken.
It was a girl. A girl he had seen in his class often. The rays of the sun glimmered in her eyes, making them seem magical and kind. Her hands were folded behind her back shyly, and she scuffed the toe of her plastic sandal against her other heel while awaiting his answer.
Being confronted by his classmates was nothing new. All the time they came up to him and chattered like mindless lemmings. But Akaashi couldn’t help but gape at this girl in shock.
She was the first person to ask.
“S-sure.”
The young girl gave him a wide smile and crashed down into the swing beside his, already propelling herself to and fro with a kick of her feet.
A feeling awoke inside Akaashi in that moment. Competition.
Quickly, he bent and locked out his knees, trying to catch up to your pace though you were quite a bit ahead. You giggled and squealed when he swung ahead of you, and cheered victoriously when you blew past him.
Breathless. That’s how he felt. There was a glow in his chest, and suddenly he understood why so many other kids enjoyed being around their fellow classmates.
Having a friend who enjoyed the same things as him was fun.
~~~
“YN!” Akaashi groaned, grimacing at the sight of you dancing victoriously above him.
“Look at all this money, Keiji!” You threw the Monopoly dollars in the air, waggling your hips and whooping. “How does it feel to SUCK?”
The black haired boy only folded his arms and pushed himself deeper amongst the blankets of the pillow fort. A pout carved onto his face when you began rubbing the fake bills against your cheeks. “Ahh, to be a millionaire. By the way, how’s your bankruptcy?”
“Shush, you,” he sulked, grabbing a stray pillow and tossing it at your head. You only dodged and laughed, crashing onto the floor beside him with a large oof.
“Ahh c’mon, you know you love me twerp,” you poked the side of his cheek as you laid on your back with a grin.
Shaking his head, Akaashi turned his face the other way and hid a small smile. “I can’t believe you were my first friend.”
“Only ‘cause you sucked at swinging too.”
“How does one suck at swinging?”
“I don’t know! How do-”
“Kids!” Akaashi’s mother interrupted, peeking her head into the fort with a quirk of her lips. “You better get to sleep. It’s almost ten.”
“Okay, Mom,” the boy nodded, discreetly jabbing your stomach as soon as she disappeared outside once more.
“OW!” you squealed, ruffling his hair in return.
The living room grew silent as you both settled in to sleep five minutes later. The excitement had calmed down, and now Akaashi was huddled in a blanket just a few inches away from your own.
His heart raced at the idea, and many thoughts flitted through his head. One being…
“Hey YN?”
You fake snored loudly and Akaashi scoffed, pulling a lock of your hair.
“Geez dude, why you always gotta hurt me?” You rolled over, incidentally getting even closer to your friend, and opened your eyes to face him. Akaashi was almost choking at the proximity.
With a purse of his lips, he lifted himself on one elbow and scratched the back of his neck. He avidly avoided your gaze as his cheeks tinged pink. “Sorry, I just….”
You raised a brow. “Yeah…?”
“We’re gonna stay friends, right? Even when we go to middle school? And even high school?”
Akaashi held his breath while you tapped your cheek thoughtfully. “Well, I was actually kinda hoping I could replace you with Godzilla once we got there, but if that doesn’t work out, then I guess so,” you shrugged.
He rolled his eyes and licked his lips. “Come on, I’m being serious.”
“I am too.”
“Come on.”
“All right, all right!” You lifted your hand out from under your blanket and poked him in the cheek once again, a new, nervous habit of yours. “Of course, stupid. We’re gonna be best friends forever. I promise.”
You held out your pinkie with a grin, and Akaashi stared at it hesitantly.
“Forever?”
You nodded, and he gave in, interlocking his last finger with your smaller one.
“Yeah, Keiji. Forever.”
~~~
Volleyball became a huge part of Akaashi’s life in middle school, and even on into high school.
“Hey, hey, hey Akaashi! Pass it to me!”
But not once did your friendship stray.
“It’s yours, Bokuto!”
Every few seconds, he caught a glimpse of you in the stands. A large grin adorned your face, and you held a personalized sign just for him that you waved frantically any time he scored a point.
“GO AKAASHI!!!” Your voice, almost impeded by the overall clamor and volume of the gymnasium, was still fine-tuned in his ears. They perked at the cheer like the first melody of a bird on a bright morning.
A quirk of his lips accompanied the call, and he had to shake his head to stay focused on the game.
Block this guy’s spike.
Send the set directly above the net so Bokuto can get a cross-court shot.
Where’s Konoha?
I better send this one to-
His never ending train of thoughts faltered for a second at the sound of a collective gasp. Nothing amazing had happened on the court, at least not from his point of view. So something must’ve happened in the crowd.
Hollers and cheers shifted to low, concerned murmurs.
The team on the other side of the net watched the audience in complete shock.
What is…
Akaashi turned around with a crease in his brow and instinctively searched for you.
You were gone.
Nostrils flaring, he slipped under the net to the other side of the court for a better vantage point. The sight shot his heart to pieces.
There, on the second level of the gym, collapsed against the plastic bleachers, was your unconscious form.
~~~
The fluorescent lights on the ceiling of the hospital buzzed almost silently. And yet, for as long as Akaashi had been there, it was the only sound he could hear.
He stood outside your room like a guard dog, keeping his gaze locked on you at all times.
Through the glass windows of your room, he watched as your parents hugged you with tear-stained cheeks. You, on the other hand, were emotionless. Your eyes were unfocused, and you didn’t seem to be tuned into reality at the moment.
A half an hour passed. Your parents finally let him into the room, and he stepped in almost unwillingly.
“Mom, Dad, can… umm… can we have a moment alone?”
Your mom almost screeched in denial, but your father swiftly nodded and grabbed her hand, tugging her out of the room. “Of course, sweetie.”
As soon as the door clicked shut behind them, Akaashi gnawed on his bottom lip nervously. “So….”
You seemed to snap out of it and turned to him with blank eyes. Your form was slumped back against the pillows of the hospital bed and you fiddled with the white cotton blanket. A thin, white nightgown covered your body, but it seemed to tremble every few seconds. Or maybe that was you. “Keiji.”
He took the cue and scurried to your bedside, grabbing your IV-plugged hand in his own. The pads of his fingers ran over your skin in a comforting manner, but he wasn’t exactly sure if it was helping any. “YN… what-”
“The doctor said I have like a year.” You sounded so distant, locked away deep inside yourself. Almost confused at what was happening, but you also knew your fate.
Akaashi couldn’t breathe. His eyes watered and his brows furrowed and he almost grew angry at your dismissive state. But he couldn’t be mad at you. It wasn’t your fault.
“What,” he shakily whispered, whole body rigid, “YN, what happened?”
“I don’t know,” your voice cracked, and suddenly the facade fell. Or maybe reality finally set in. “They said I’m sick or something and it’s incurable and I’m going to die! Oh God, I’m going to die, Keiji!” You wailed and bawled and cried as much as you could, and Akaashi let his tears flow too.
“I don’t wanna die!”
Akaashi nodded, grimacing and clenching his eyes closed while he sat on your bed and hugged you.
“Please, I don’t wanna die!”
Your body convulsed in his grasp as you heaved out sobs, afraid of something you couldn’t fight. This was a battle no one could win. This was fate.
Akaashi cursed under his breath as he rocked you back and forth, running a hand through your tangled strands before whispering soft reassurances to your deaf ears.
You began to cough and hiccup, shoving your face deeper into his soaked shoulder.
Nothing could be said. Nothing could be done.
The room was tense, filled with utter, uncontrolled fear.
Nothing could stop this.
“Please don’t let me die.”
Akaashi’s bloodshot eyes opened in the slightest as an idea hit him. He squeezed you tighter as your sobs slowed to whimpers, and shook his head. I won’t let that happen.
~~~
“Do you have an eight?”
“Go fish.”
“Fuck.”
“Do you have a king?”
“...No.”
“YN.”
“FINE!” You threw your cards down on the bed with a pout. Akaashi chuckled and gathered up the cards, giving you a smug glance.
“What is it you said to me when we were kids? ‘How does it feel to suck?’”
You stuck out your tongue and batted his teasing hands away before folding your arms. “Shut up,” you muttered.
The hospital room was becoming more and more your own. Flowers decorated the windowsill, a couple books sat on the nightstand, and you even had a few folded cranes of Akaashi’s on your headboard.
Months had passed, nine to be specific, since you got the diagnosis. Time was running out.
“Well, YN, I brought your homework.” Akaashi dug around in his bag before pulling out a stack of assignments. A bright yellow sticky note sat on the top with your name scribbled haphazardly.
“You know, Keiji, it’s funny you think I’d actually spend my time doing that instead of, oh I don’t know,” you playfully shrugged, “having fun the rest of my life.”
Akaashi gulped but forced his smile to remain steady on his face. For you.
“I think you should still do it, YN. It’ll keep you smart.”
“What smarts am I gonna need when I’m-”
“YN please.” Akaashi winced at your recent lax in self-respect. A muscle in his jaw irked at the thought, but his eyes stayed locked on the cranes just above your head.
You nodded and softened your gaze. “Sorry, Keiji.” You held out your hands and accepted the papers he handed you. “I’ll try my best on them.”
“Thank you. And don’t forget to use my notes,” Akaashi added.
“How could I,” you scoffed. “Half of ‘em are done in glitter pens.” The corner of Akaashi’s mouth quirked up at the thought.
“Only ‘cause I know you like them that way.” Akaashi leaned in to give you a hug, pressing a kiss to your hair that he knew you couldn’t feel. Your warmth, the warmth you filled his heart with, made him never want to leave. But he had to.
“All right, I have to go, but before I do,” Akaashi dug around in his bag for a second before locating his gift with a sparkle in his eyes. “Here.”
A blue paper crane was set in your palm, and his fingers brushed yours before he pulled them away. Your body wiggled in happiness at the new addition.
“Yay! Another one! How about I call this one…” you trailed off, tapping your chin in thought. Then you pointed your finger in the air in glee. “Perry! What do you think, Keiji?”
You reached up and set the crane along with the others while Akaashi nodded in agreement. “It’s perfect. I’ll see you tomorrow, YN.”
Just as Akaashi stepped away, you grabbed his hand and tugged it to gain his attention once again.
“What’s wrong?”
You scrutinized his face with narrowed eyes, reaching your hand up and brushing your fingers just above his cheeks. “Keiji?”
“Hmm?” His eyes were almost closed in bliss, enjoying every spark of exhilaration that came with your touch. He flinched when you patted his cheek roughly.
“Get some more sleep at night. You look like shit.”
Blue eyes flickering open, he covered your hand with his own and delivered a soft kiss to your palm. “Not in a million years.”
~~~
Everything around him was fuzzy and blurred. The room was so dim and warm. A wave of exhaustion hit him every two seconds, leaving his head reeling and his ears thumping.
And yet, he wouldn’t move.
No, not if he couldn’t help it.
Papercuts littered his fingers. Scraps and scraps of paper, all shapes, colors and sizes, laid out in front of him, along with one lone whiteboard and marker.
The sun was just beginning to rise outside his window, and birds began to stir in their nests.
Fuck, he was so tired. His body pleaded with him to close his eyes just once.
No.
Shuffling of parchment became his new white noise. The pads of his fingers were on fire with every fold and every crease.
Then he set the new crane behind him, uncapped the marker and drew a single tick mark.
“Eight-hundred and seventy-four,” he muttered with a sigh.
Another.
He grabbed a new page with sore, pained arms, resisting the urge to yawn and starting anew.
Fold. Crease. Fold. Crease. Fold.
“Eight-hundred and seventy-five.”
~~~
“Ughhh yesss,” you moaned, licking the sweet stickiness off your fingers. “It’s been too long since I’ve had ice cream.”
Akaashi smiled at the sight. Your face had glowed with pure joy when he showed up with your favorite flavor, and you had deadpanned “I love you.”
It was enough for him. He chuckled into his own bowl before swallowing another spoonful. “What, is the Jello not any good here?”
You flipped him off and continued downing your cold treat. “Next time they try to force that gelatinous shit down my throat, I’m just gonna hop out the window.”
“From the fourth floor?”
You shrugged. “Why not? I could make it! I’ve seen it in the movies, all you have to do is roll.”
Your dark haired friend scoffed at the thought. “Yes, please ‘roll.’ It will be much quicker travel than limping on two broken legs.”
You busted out laughing. “See? Now you get it!” Your face was frozen in pure joy as you held your ice cream.
This moment made it all worth it. You were beautiful. Completely happy and carefree for the first time in a year. Akaashi didn’t want you to worry anymore.
He would only hope that you could find someone to make you laugh like this again once he was gone. He didn’t want you to be alone like he had been before you. You were the light of his life. You made him discover a purpose for living, and you lead him through it. He would follow you to the ends of the Earth if need be. And now was the time to repay you.
His bag was empty this visit aside from a single slip of paper. It was blue, your favorite color. “It reminds me of your eyes, which are really hot, by the way,” you had said.
“I did my homework like you asked.” You nodded with complete self-assurance and even held up the assignment. “I might’ve gotten number three wrong though….”
“That’s okay.” Akaashi set down his bowl and stood up, approaching your bedside with slow, purposeful steps.
You were breathtaking at this angle. The sun shined just barely through your room’s window, and lit up your entire face with a single ray. It emphasized the natural glow of life you already had.
Yeah, he could do this. For you, he would do anything.
When he stopped at your bedside, you shifted under your blankets until your legs hung off the side of the mattress. Completely facing him, you threw him a questioning glance. “What’s up?”
“Can I kiss you?”
He had to at least try. If only once.
You stopped breathing and your heart stuttered in your chest. Akaashi could read it all over your flushed face that-- Thank God-- you felt the same way he did.
It was a mixture of euphoria and anxiousness that flooded his stomach when you nodded. A shy smile covered your face, and it grew larger the closer he leaned towards you. Then finally, your lips touched.
The kiss was soft and slow, with Akaashi’s hands landing on the bed around you to support himself. Your lips were plush and tasted like sugary sweetness, and he snatched up your chin the second you tried to pull away too soon.
This second kiss was more passionate, rushed and intoxicating. The fervor of it left you feeling light-headed and breathless. And loved. His lips smashed against your own in a desperation of showing how he felt. It was as if he was making up for lost time, or something opposite of that.
And then he pulled away, gasping for air and not regretting a thing. His hand slowly dropped from your chin and fell to your thigh, barely covered by the thin hospital gown. His fingertips, rougher than you remembered, gently massaged your skin, leaving you to sigh happily.
His forehead pressed against your own, and smiles were permanently etched on both your faces.
“I love you,” Akaashi finally whispered, eyes staring honestly into your own.
“I love you too,” you pecked his lips once more and he returned it with ease.
You stayed like that for so long, just enjoying the feeling and proximity of one another. The air was clear. You loved each other.
But now, one of you had to let go.
Akaashi pulled away slowly with one last peck. While you sat with affectionate eyes watching his every move, he dug in his bag and pulled out a slip of paper.
“You write me a letter or something?” you teased.
“This is better than any letter I could write you, love, trust me.” Akaashi threw you a soft smile before settling onto the bed beside you.
You watched in utter fascination as folded and pressed the paper with skilled fingers.
“Wow, Keiji, you’re so good at that!” You let a hand hover over his own and stop the process for a second. “How long have you been practicing?”
Akaashi froze in an instant, but quickly rolled his shoulders and relaxed his form, leaning himself closer to your presence. “Quite a while now, but I did it for you.”
You beamed at him, tears pricking your eyes. “Keiji….” With a small, disbelieving shake of your head, you pressed your lips to his own just one more time. This time as a thank you.
Then you urged him to continue with a slight wave of your hand.
And he did so.
Fold. Crease. Fold. Crease. Fold.
And at last, the final product. A single paper crane of gorgeous blue, just like his eyes.
“YN.”
“Hmm?”
Akaashi hands you the crane and stares deeply into your eyes. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“And I wish for your life to be spared. At the expense of my own.”
“What?” You giggle in confusion, growing more and more concerned as Akaashi’s eyes seem to flutter.
Then they close for one last time.
“Keiji?”
His body slumps back, falling like dead weight to the mattress of your hospital bed.
“Keiji?!”
You were afraid. So afraid.
“Keiji, what did you do?” you mumble breathlessly, wide eyes locked on him. On his body.
“WHAT DID YOU DO?!”
Gut-wrenching sobs tore through your chest, leaving your whole form trembling.
“KEIJI!” Your blood-curdling screams led crowds of nurses to your room, but they could never pull you away. You, keeled over Akaashi’s lifeless form, refused to move even an inch. You hugged him close, wailing and wailing against his unmoving chest. Incoherent moans scratch your throat as you rock him back and forth, whispering I love yous one last time.
The legend was uncomplicated, but so painfully real.
A thousand paper cranes. One wish.
And Akaashi’s wish was simple. A life for a life.
Him. For you.
hi,,, do u still take requests? if so uhm :( can u write an akaashi x reader au based on burn fr0m hamilton?
Burned Promises (Akaashi x Reader)
*GIF not mine*
Summary: Every letter he wrote you was useless now. After he cheated, they were filled with nothing but lies, and what was the point of keeping lies lying around? (Based on Hamilton song “Burn.”)
A/N: Requests are open :)! I’ve never watched Hamilton, so… let’s just hope this is what you wanted. BUT I DID MY RESEARCH. Now it’s not this whole Hamilton/Haikyuu rewrite, but I did take the gist of the song and write it for Akaashi, so I hope you like it! Enjoy!
Word count: 1217
When you had first met Akaashi, he had enchanted you. The way he spoke so eloquently, how he held himself so purposefully. His looks had struck you first, with black locks tussled so perfectly atop his head and gunmetal blue eyes that struck your heart.
He had bewitched you.
Since the day you met, it appeared you had captured his attention as well. He wrote you letters, and much like the way he delivered his words by mouth, he delivered them through pen potently.
Every paper you received filled you with euphoria. Seeing your name scripted in personalized swirls of his hand lit your love aflame. But it was the sentences, the paragraphs he crafted so passionately that kept you entranced.
“My angel, every second I spend away from you is a second of my life wasted.”
You felt the same.
“Unlike what others say, your love has strengthened me and filled me with purpose.”
You felt the same.
“My angel, we were meant to be. Every thought in my consciousness has been overtaken by the image of you.” You felt the same. “Bliss floods my heart when I receive mail graced with your devotion. I devour your every word like a man starved the longer we are apart. Please, my angel, send more to me. Each piece you send me fills the whole your parted presence has left. I am yours, and your cherishes will fuel me till the end of time.”
You felt the same. Or apparently you felt some way.
In the streets of your own town, on some random day, you began to feel like an outcast. People observed you with pity and sorrow.
“Poor girl.”
“What a shame.”
“No one deserves that.”
What were they talking about?
It didn’t take long for news to travel one step farther. Your friend enveloped you in a hug and rubbed your back soothingly after you had shown up on her doorstep in tears.
“I should have listened to you.”
She had warned you months ago to watch him, be careful around him. She had said that one day, he would hurt you, and she was right.
After months and months of letters exchanging affection and tenderness, Akaashi had broken your heart. He cheated with another woman and hadn’t even had the gall to tell you first.
No, you had to learn from others. People who barely even knew you told you that your relationship had fallen apart.
~~~
That night, Akaashi slipped into the house with a grimace. In search of you, he followed the sounds of a crackling fire and entered the living room. You were seated with your back to him, facing the chimney with your knees on the hardwood floor. Your entire form slumped as you settled back on your heels.
He hesitated to enter, instead clenching his jaw and standing in the doorway.
“Angel…”
“Don’t.”
Your voice was quiet and scratchy as you spat the word. From what he could see, your hands were laid out in your lap, holding something.
The flickering flames were the only thing lighting the dark room, hissing and battling each other to grow stronger. Silence overlaid the tense atmosphere, and Akaashi found himself unable to breathe. His hands twitched by his side, the hands that had touched another woman.
He wanted to hold you, comfort you if possible. But that wasn’t going to happen any time soon.
You heaved a sigh and lifted your head, previously dropped low, and stared into the burning heat. With all the composure you could muster, you unlatched the fireplace door and pulled it open, letting your eyes water at the increased light.
And then you threw one in. His first letter.
Akaashi inhaled swiftly at the sight but he didn’t move a muscle.
He had meant every word he had written in those letters. Things had just… gotten messy and grown to be too much at one point.
At least, that’s the excuse he told you.
“I don’t care,” you muttered in response, observing another letter with a snarl before feeding it to the crackling flames. The parchment was engulfed in seconds, and every sentence that had ever made your heart twinge scorched up with a tsss.
The pile of papers dwindled down to one, and you scanned it over for a split second.
“I will always be yours.”
It charred into smoky flakes just as quickly as the others.
You wiped away a wave of tears and closed the door to the chimney before smoothing out the skirt of your nightgown. Then you rose to your feet and closed your eyes, taking one long, deep breath.
The peace didn’t last long.
Your gaze flew open at the feeling of a hand settling on your shoulder.
“YN, I still love y-”
You threw off Akaashi’s grip and whipped around, giving him a fierce glare.
“I hope you burn in hell.”
His eyes dropped and his cheek twitched at the words.
After a few minutes, you could no longer stand the sight of him. Your heart ached to think that he could betray you in such a way. He said he was mine.
You wished you could forget it all. Not only what he had done, but everything before. The first kisses, the first touches, the first anything.
You wanted to forget the strong arms that had caressed you to sleep at night. You wanted to forget the long fingers that had combed through your hair. The soft smiles, only for you. The flicker in his eyes that spoke volumes. The tenderness of the lips that had kissed you, brushed over every inch of you.
Akaashi wasn’t yours anymore. And God how you wish that wasn’t true.
With a shake of your head, you made your way out of the living room, pausing only in the doorway to glance back at him.
He stood with his head hanging low, but, as if he felt the weight of it, he looked up to meet your gaze.
His eyes, pools of deep indigo with the occasional fleck of cyan, stared at you deeply. They glimmered with hope.
You wouldn’t be so cruel as to feed it.
You turned away with a trembling frown and continued on your trek up the stairs. Footsteps attempted to follow you to the bedroom, but you threw a halting hand over your shoulder and shook your head. The strides slowed to a stop behind you, and you could swear you heard a silent whine.
He was broken over what had happened too. But that didn’t mean you forgave him.
You couldn’t face him as you said it, but one half of your bed would be empty for a while.
“Sleep on the couch for now, Keiji.”
God, I hope he burns.