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Love, Anonymous | Blaise Zabini
Synopsis: The rumor mill at Hogwarts has expanded into physical print, and with it, a buzzing section dedicated to anonymous confessions.Â
Pairing: Blaise Zabini x Hufflepuff!Reader
Notes: I accidentally grew extremely fond of Ernie while writing this. Susan Bones supremacy, always.
Word Count: 4.8k
The infamous rumor mill of Hogwarts, upheld by boisterous Gryffindors Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil, seemed to finally reach eminence in the social sphere of the castle. It was a long time coming, you thought. Grapevines. Heard from a friend. Through an open door â nothing was as fascinating as the arbitrary spiel that grew to fruition in the rumor mill.Â
âIâm impressed. With all of this, youâd think Lavender was going after Skeeterâs job.â Susan hums, eyes scanning over the leaflets of paper lain strewn in front of you both.Â
Ernie snorts as he shovels a spoonful of peas into his mouth, eyes rooted to the ceiling as he awaited the daily post, âWhat a load of bollocks.âÂ
âHey, now. Donât be so curt with it, E.â You muse, mouth folding into a wry grin as you pick up one of the loose papers, bringing it to eye-level so you could read it, âLook at this riveting slice of writing, Hogwarts Anonymous: With the Yule Ball so fresh in the minds of the student bodyââÂ
âFresh? It was almost three bloody years ago.â Ernie interjects, tongue clicking loudly as the sea of owls begin to scurry across the plane of the ceiling, dropping rolls and boxes of news and gifts. However, the surge of mail went largely ignored as many students remained engrossed in the new Hogwarts gossip column.Â
You shoot Ernie a stern look at the interruption, but continue when Susan releases an amused huff, âAs I was sayingâWith the Yule Ball so fresh in the minds of the student body and love so sorely missed as a result, Hogwarts Anonymous is dedicated to working towards the revival of matchmaking. To submit an anonymous clip of your own, reach out to Parvati Patil for inquiries.âÂ
âLove so sorely missed?â Susan echoes, eyes blown wide in disbelief.Â
âPoetic. Inspired. Riveting. Ingenious.â Ernie utters with faux sincerity, ignoring the raucous younger years fighting behind him.Â
You nod, barely able to conceal your grin as your eyes drop further down the blocks of text, seeing a few confessions and messages splayed across the paper. As you continue to read through the text, a sudden passage has you choking on your spit, thumb pressing harshly against the flimsy paper as your eyes narrow.Â
Ernie peers up at you from his plate, glancing towards Susan as they both share unimpressed looks. Eventually, itâs Susan who plucks up the voice to question your sudden bafflement, âY/N? Are you alright there?âÂ
âY/N looks like a startled crup puppy in Arithmancy.â You recite rigidly, feeling the paper warp and crease under your unrelenting grip.Â
There is an unsettling pause in the atmosphere, as though the entirety of the dining hall has paused in their routine to listen to the confession, but it soon washes away as Ernie practically howls in laughter, his broad frame throttling forward as he tries to muffle his guffaw.Â
Susan, ever the diplomat, proves to be more successful at maintaining her composure, but you donât miss the small grin that tugs at her lips as she reaches over to grasp the paper, âHere, give me that.âÂ
âCrup puppy? Oh my goodness! That is bloodyâOw! Hey! Okay, stop!â Ernieâs fit of laughter and verbal tirade is swiftly dealt with as you send numerous stinging hexes his way, basking in the alarmed glint in his eyes.Â
Susan shakes her head at both of your antics, and folds the paper up, eyes scanning the room as she muses, âHow romantic. You just have to wonder who the culprit is.âÂ
âMerlin. It might just be a prank. Or maybe someone has a vendetta against me.â You groan with exasperation, realizing that just about everyone in the castle was going to be hearing about it.Â
Ernie bumps his shoulder against yours and grins, âChin up, Y/N. If someoneâs out to get ya, Susan and I will send them to their makerâwithout their kneecaps, rest assured.âÂ
You roll your eyes but nod in appreciation, gaze falling down to your pitiful plate of food as your mind is thrust into overdrive. Hopefully, it would all blow over by the next day.Â
Wishful thinking on your part because in fact, it did not.Â
âIt is endearing how Y/N is always lost during Potions.â Susan reads off the paper with squinted eyes, mouth furling into a frown of disbelief at the words.Â
âDoes this person hate me?â You murmur, leaning on your elbows as your eyes run across the aisle of bookshelves in front of you.Â
Ernie rocks on the heels of his feet as he hums, âAbysmal flirting. Subpar, one-sided banter. Hardly charming. A Gryffindor, for sure.âÂ
âWell, the only Gryffindor in both Arithmancy with me and Potions with us is Hermione Granger, and I surely hope she hasnât turned away from Ron. Heâll be insufferable if so.â You grit out, torn between chasing down your secret âadmirerâ and putting forth your best effort to ignore their future comments. Â
Susan hums at your suggestion with crossed arms, Runes homework long forgotten about, âSurely not. So not a Gryffindorâ and really Ernie, you canât let your heartache blind your judgement! Seriously, are we sticking with the âAll Gryffindors Are Badâ thing?âÂ
Ernie gapes at her words and pinches the bridge of his nose, âGuys, Iâm over her, weâve been through this.âÂ
You pat your friends arm empathetically, hiding your sly grin as you muse, âOf course you are. Poor Fay Dunbar, really.â
Before your friend can retort, the sound of clicking footsteps attracts your attention as a figure emerges from behind the shelf next to you. Your eyebrows furrow as you watch the familiar Slytherin stroll towards you all with cool eyes, hands shoved in his dress pants as he hums, âBones. Macmillan.â His eyes drop down to where youâre seated and you see an indecipherable glint cross his gaze as he greets you, âPuppy.â
Your reaction is almost immediate as a hot wave of mortification swallows all your sensibilities, âExcuse me?â Your offended wheeze hardly deters the Slytherin as he merely smirks at you.Â
âI think your time would be better spent working through the latest Arithmancy assignment instead of gossiping, no?â He asks with a slanted grin, eyes never trailing away from yours.Â
âWhatâs it to you, Zabini?â Your voice comes out taut as you feel Ernie place a hand on the back of your chair, likely eyeing down the boy in front of you.Â
Blaiseâs eyes briefly flicker to survey Ernieâs ministrations before they glide back to you in consideration, âJust concerned for a fellow classmate is all. Iâll see you around, Puppy.â Without giving you time to retaliate, the tall Slytherin vanishes just as swiftly as he arrived.Â
âThe absolute nerve!â You utter with indignation, swiveling your attention over to Susan. The girl frowns in the direction that Blaise disappeared through, eyes glimmering as you could see her brain whirring.Â
âStrange. I thought Zabini was one of the tamer Slytherins out of their lot.â Ernie mutters, resuming his position beside you as he rubs his chin.Â
You shake your head, âMalfoyâs influence is something to fear for years to come. Zabini may have been pleasant in our youth, but heâs been so shifty to me as of late.âÂ
Ernie snaps his fingers at your words and snickers down at you, âYou used to have the largest love-sick eyes for him.âÂ
Clicking your tongue, you send a side glance at your friend before looking at Susan as she seems to take in your clueless expression.Â
âSeriously?â She huffs, eyebrow drawn up as she gazes at you both like she was staring at a pedestrian display.Â
âSeriously what? Suze?â You prod, leaning over as she shakes her head and redirects her attention to her work.Â
Ernie shoots you a shrug as he pulls out the chair beside you, reluctantly following the girlâs lead as he sifts through the pile of parchments in front of him.Â
The next few days blur by in a similar fashion, except you had taken to avoiding Hogwarts Anonymous like the plague, forcing Ernie and Susan to do the same when you were around. You eventually fell back into your routine of focusing on coursework and your future anxieties, letting the anomalous events slip from your mind.Â
It is not until youâre organizing your supplies during Arithmancy that your fragile bubble of peace is disturbed.Â
âPuppy.â The dulcet sound of Blaiseâs voice has you snapping your head up, boggled by his sudden appearance beside you. The boy usually sat rows behind you, leaving the spot next to you to be occupied by Padma Patil. However, it seemed she was nowhere to be found.Â
Suppressing your complaints, you donât even attempt pleasantries as you sigh, âZabini, hello.âÂ
âWhatâs with the long face? Not happy to see me?â Blaise teases, mouth stretching into a small grin.Â
Youâre almost tempted to squint as his perfectly white teeth glare at you in all their glory. Fuck. Did he not have a single flaw?
âIâm flattered, but perhaps the only thing Iâm unable to do is catch you on a good day.â Blaiseâs eyes twinkle with mirth as he smiles softly at you.Â
Your face heats up so violently that youâre sure radiators across the globe were turning to you with envy. Forcing your jaw from parting so gauchely, you can only sputter out weakly, âDid I say that out loud?âÂ
Blaise hums wordlessly as he continues to look at you. Clearing your throat, you turn back to face the front of the classroom as Professor Vector begins to rise from her desk, âRight.âÂ
The rest of the class seems to tick by like molasses from a tipped jar: incredibly, painstakingly slow. You were usually quite engaged with the lesson and content, but you couldnât ignore the occasional glances from the Italian boy beside you.Â
As you absentmindedly continue to scrawl on your parchment, eyes transfixed on the swirls of ink blooming on the page, you feel something poke your arm. Frowning, you try to ignore it, directing your full attention onto sketching your diagram.Â
The light poking persists until you bring your other hand up to swipe at your robe, fingers dancing across a sheet of paper with a slight crinkling noise. Faintly tilting your head, you furrow your eyebrows when you see Blaise attempting to slide a sheet of paper towards you. Slowly grasping the paper, you lay it atop one of your dry parchments, eyes scanning across the leaflet in confusion.Â
âHogwarts Anonymous. Submission 0128: Y/N L/N is devastatingly oblivious. It really is quite cute.â
You feel your entire body steel up at the words, lips parted from shock as you continue to reread the confession. The nerves across your body seem to buzz wildly as you try and rein in the burning climbing up your chest.Â
âAlright, dears! That will be all for today. I expect the next two chapters to be read by our next convening. Ah, and L/N, my dear! I need to speak with you.â Professor Vectorâs euphonic voice cut through your haze of disbelief, drawing your eyes away from the dizzying passage and up towards the heart of the classroom.Â
You donât dare to glance at Blaise as you quickly clamber towards the awaiting woman, weaving around the retreating students that file through the grand doors. Huffing to relieve the pressure in your chest, you peer at the woman in anticipation as you finally step toward her.Â
âSorry to call you up like this, L/N. Itâs just that the other professors and I are concerned about the recent articles that are being passed around the student body. Itâs come to our attention that these anonymous confessions regarding you are quite prolific.â Professor Vector keeps her voice steady as she gazes at you with warm eyes, evidently trying to gauge your honest opinion on the matter.Â
It would appear that everyone knew about your predicament.Â
You shake your head quickly, eyes wandering towards the tomes resting on her desk, âItâs quite alright, theyâre just small statements. Besides, no one has been giving me a hard time.â Which was partially true, but you also did not want the column to be shut down and run the risk of facing Lavenderâs wrath.Â
âIf youâre quite sure, dear.âÂ
With a soft nod, you send a small smile towards her before bounding back towards your table, releasing a small breath as you see the rest of the classroom was vacant. As you slung your bag over your shoulder, the call of your name has you twirling on your heel.Â
âL/N.â Professor Vector gives you a faint nod, âYouâre doing quite well in this class. Iâm sure whoever is sending those messages is just teasing you.âÂ
Clearing your throat, you plaster on a reassuring smile, âThank you, Professor. Have a good afternoon!âÂ
You practically sprint out of the classroom, mind set on nipping the blooms of your troublesâstarting with the roots.Â
The clicking of your shoes against the dusty corridor tiles seem to smother every other inkling of noise, many students shifting from your path with wide-eyes as your gaze darts around furiously. Even the slightest hue of crimson drew your dutiful eyes like a moth to a flame, and you were beginning to get tunnel vision.Â
A flash of wispy blonde waves flashes across your plane of sight, and youâre immediately beelining towards the girl, a victorious smile painting your face once you see Lavenderâs startled frown. The girl glances from side-to-side as you draw closer, shoulders tensing once you tentatively stop a few paces before her.Â
âLavender, good afternoon.â You greet cordially, fingers lightly brushing against your sides as you become wary of your awkward hand placement. Â
The girl nods and shoots you a confused smile, âHi, Y/N. Whatâs up?âÂ
âI think we both know why Iâm here.â You mutter frankly, head tilting down emphatically as you take notice of the latest edition of Hogwarts Anonymous in her hands.Â
Lavender glances down at the paper and hums, âAh. Right.âÂ
Sighing, you readjust the strap of your bag as you step closer, âLook, Iâm not here to give you any grief over your work. In fact, Hogwarts Anonymous is probably the most exciting thing to happen all year. But, I need to know the person behind all these messages aimed at me.âÂ
âIâm sorry, but confidentialityââ Lavender starts, eyebrows stitching together in remorse at your clear disdain over the matter.Â
Before the girl can continue her, no doubt, enlightening spiel about the rules of journalism, a velvety voice curls through the air around you, âHello, Puppy. What seems to be the fuss.âÂ
You arenât sure any measure of propriety could have stopped you from raising your eyes to the sky as you slowly spin on your heel. A frown briefly washes over your face as you address the boy behind you, âZabini. Again with that nickname? Itâs getting quite old. Originality doesnât seem to be your strong suit.âÂ
âNo use in fixing what isnât broken. Besides, Iâve never known you to be overly concerned with trivialities like this.â The boy retorts, eyes sparkling with blatant amusement.Â
You purse your lips at his choice of words before musing, âThatâs because you donât know me, Zabini.âÂ
Without missing a beat, Blaise is quick to step closer to you, head craning towards you imperceptibly as he lowers his voice, âI suppose youâre right. I could get to know you though.âÂ
Your lips part at his words, but you try to remain nonchalant as you huff, âHysterical. And whatâs in it for me?âÂ
âYouâd get to know me, too.âÂ
âAs enticing as that sounds, Iâll have to pass.â You mutter, taking a step back from the boy. His eyes remain firm with confidence even as you begin to retreat, your gaze glued to the growing smirk on his face.Â
As your nerves finally seem to spark back to life, you swiftly spin around and begin to stomp towards your common room, brain muddled with harping thoughts about the exchange. Before youâre able to round the corner, you hear Lavenderâs soft voice bristle through the air, âMaybe try a different approachâŚâÂ
A few odd days pass after your encounter with Blaise, and youâve taken to gluing yourself to Ernie and Susan in hopes that the Slytherin would be too intimidated to approach you again. Your friends take the new developments in stride, only occasionally shooting you knowing glances.Â
âWeird.â Ernie hums, fingers drumming against the grass as he peers at the paper in his lap.Â
You donât take your eyes off of the serene lake just yards away as you reply, âWhatâs weird?âÂ
Susan pauses in her reading as Ernie straightens up and turns to you, âThere arenât any more anonymous messages about you in the column.âÂ
âSeems that you missed your chance with your secret admirer, Y/N.â Susan hums, propping her chin on her palm as she smiles teasingly at you.Â
You shake your head and wave them both off, âI talked to Lavender the other day, maybe she intentionally left it out. Either way, I look forward to reinhabiting the semblance of peace that I lost.âÂ
Ernie hums as he diverts his gaze towards something behind you, âPeace might have to wait.âÂ
âY/N.â Blaiseâs honeyed voice dances through the cool air, accompanied with the soft crunching of grass as you sense the boy approach your lazing figure.Â
âBlaise.â You greet evenly, eyes slowly drifting across the tufts of clouds meandering across the sky.Â
Susan and Ernie pretend to busy themselves as the Slytherin stops behind you, close enough where the edges of his robe lightly graze against your back. It is quiet for a few moments before the boy addresses you again, âHave you given my offer any further thought?âÂ
âI canât say I have.â You mutter, slowly fidgeting with your wand as you add, âDo you want me to?âÂ
The Italian huffs out a small laugh before you hear a faint rustling, âThatâs entirely up to you.â Your eyebrows draw together in confusion, but before you can turn around to question him, a crisp envelope drops into your vision. You feel the curtains of Blaiseâs robe swim across your back as he offers the tempting object to you.Â
Gently grasping the envelope, you flip it in your palm to inspect the front, but youâre met with shallow disappointment when you see the paper is completely blank. On the back, you recognize the Zabini emblem pressed into the bleeding red wax.Â
âBlaise, what is this for?â You slowly peer over your shoulder only to be met with Blaiseâs retreating back growing farther into the distance.Â
Staring at the envelope with a frown, you debate on whether or not to frisbee-launch the paper into the lake as the wind sweeps across your face. Susan is the first to interrupt the calm silence that blanketed the air, shooting you a knowing smile as she points her chin at the stiff paper, âOpen it.âÂ
âDo you know something about this?â You question with narrowed eyes, tone light with jest, but bleeding in genuine confusion.Â
âAbout the envelope? Nope.â She hums with a sweet smile, quickly swiveling her head back to her book.Â
You shuffle closer to your friends, shooting them a disbelieving frown, âAnd about Blaise?âÂ
Ernie mimes a zipping motion across his mouth as he shakes his head, which is all you need from the boy to know that both of your friends were privy to something you werenât seeing. Clicking your tongue with exaggerated indignation, you carefully peel the envelope open, noting that neither of your friends were attempting to peer over to see its contents as you did so.
You didnât know if you were thankful or concerned for that fact.Â
Reaching inside the smooth cradle of paper, your fingers run across a folded piece of paper. Pulling it out, you hesitate for a few moments before deciding to bite the bullet.Â
Smooth, even swirls of letters dance across the paper in abundance much to your surprise.Â
Y/N,Â
Lavender advised me that my previous tactic of trying to get your attention was ineffective, so I should therefore be more forthcoming. I hope you understand now. Although it was entertaining watching you fumble about for answers, I realize that time is slowly dwindling as we progress through our last year here at Hogwarts.Â
This is not some ploy if youâre wondering (because I know that you are⌠really, are you Hufflepuffs not supposed to be the most trusting of us all?)Â
I have admired you for quite some time. If you are willing to, letâs meet before dinner. I will be at the library.Â
Love,Â
âAnonymousâÂ
You drop the letter into your lap as you sigh into the air, neck aching as you roll your head from side to side. Ernie assesses you from the corner of his eye, head tilting at your reaction, âWell?âÂ
âWell, Iâll have to meet you both at dinner it seems.â You concede with a heavy sigh, realizing that you were the only one who was drowning in the darkness of oblivion for the past few days.Â
Susan nods at you with twinkling eyes as Ernie muses with a wide grin, âSounds like a plan. Good luck!âÂ
Pacing away from your friends and up the vague incline of grass, you fiddle with the paper in your hands as you begin to dredge up all your encounters with Blaise. They were plentiful in your youth, but between then and the whirlwind of Hogwarts Anonymousâ you could count the number of proper conversations youâve had with the Slytherin on one hand.Â
Thatâs not to say you still didn't find the boy attractive. There was an unspoken consensus amongst the entire student body that he was the prime candidate for bachelor, between his suave demeanor, dry wit, academic prowess, towering trust fund, and neutral political stanceâ it did not get much better than Blaise fucking Zabini.
For the first time in weeks, you feel that your head is finally clear. An airy aura encircling you as you traverse through the halls, not minding the bustling of younger students or the perpetual miasma of stress that radiated off of your fellow seventh-year peers. Â
At the threshold of the bright library, you take a deep breath of consideration before you step in, an intangible veil of warmth immediately ushering you into its cavernous hold as you sift your gaze through the hunched backs and steep shelves.Â
Taking slow steps so as to not remain erect in the entrance and cause traffic, youâre snapped from your concentration by the softest tug to your robe sleeve. Dropping your gaze to the chair beside you, you arenât able to mask your nonplusness at the sight of a familiar Slytherin searching your expression with curiosity.Â
âOh, hi Theodore.â You wave smally, stepping closer as he begins to speak.Â
âY/N. Youâre here for Blaise, right?â The boyâs words are barely above a murmur as he slowly shuts the cover of his book.Â
You nod and shift to lean against the table as Theodore begins to look around, only dropping your eyes to him once he speaks up again, âHe just came in. He might be toward the back, near the Restricted Section. He doesnât like being around others when heâs restless.âÂ
âOh?â Your eyebrows shoot up at the insinuation, unable to truly comprehend a mental picture of the composed Slytherin as anything but smug and assured.Â
Humming, you shift your weight from one leg to the other as you dismiss yourself, âAlright. Thank you, Theodore. Iâll see you around.â
The boy merely nods before turning back to his work, but you donât miss the glimmer that flickers across his eyes as they quickly catch sight of the letter in your handâ it was the same knowing look that your friends held.Â
Shuffling towards the back of the library, you slowly feel the confidence draining from your veins as you near the Restricted Section. Rounding one of the shelves, you stop in your tracks as you catch sight of Blaise sitting at a corner table by the window, robe discarded and flung over the adjacent chair as his eyes run across the book in his hand.Â
Clearing your throat faintly, you make your way towards him. Before youâre even within reaching distance to him, his head shoots up toward you.Â
His eyes swim with confusion for a split moment before they sink into a familiar unreadable look.Â
âI read your letter.â You mutter with uncertainty, squaring your shoulders as Blaise nods and rises from his chair.Â
âI wasnât expecting you so soon,â He softly admits, lips curling up at the sheepish look that replaces your former expression of hesitancy. Before you have time to reply, he steps forward and chuckles, âCouldnât wait to see me, then?âÂ
Swallowing harshly, you hum, âYou have a bit of explaining to do.âÂ
âYeah, I do.â His voice comes out light, shedding away into a near whisper at the end as he gazes at you with consideration. He takes a step forward and continues, âBefore that though, I need to know how you feel.âÂ
âAbout you?â Your mumble is met with a firm nod, and you feel your heart miss a few beats as the words seem to just glide out of your mouth without filter, âWell, we havenât spoken properly all that much this year or last year, but I like you⌠too. I like you, too.âÂ
âYeah?â Blaise hums, shoulders faintly drooping as the tension dissipates from his muscles. He reaches his hand out in offering, and you have to give his face another once-over to confirm that it wasnât an elaborate ruse before you take it.Â
He slowly drags you towards him before nudging you to sit in his chair as he smiles, âWell, Iâll apologize for the public messages, it just seemed like the opportune moment when Lavender approached me.âÂ
âLavender approached you?â You quietly squawk, not even batting an eye when Blaise crouches in front of you and brings his other hand to clasp yours.Â
âMy attraction to you is no secret, Y/N. Not that I tried to hide it.â He supplies, eyes full of warmth as you recount all the indecipherable looks youâd received from Blaiseâs friends over the months. Honestly, you had merely assumed they were looking for a fight.Â
Squeezing the boyâs hands, and ignoring the tingling that buzzed up your wrist from the coolness of his steel rings, you muse, âSo⌠you like me.âÂ
âHm.â Blaise hums patiently, assured by your reciprocation of his physical touch.Â
âWell, youâre quite the romantic, Zabini.â You canât fight the lopsided smile that falls on your face.Â
Blaise huffs a small laugh as he shakes his head, âI was thinking youâd hold a contrary sentiment.âÂ
âYou better be planning ways to make it up to me, public scrutiny is not enjoyable.â You mutter with a small grin, relishing in the way Blaise shifted at your words.Â
He gives your hands a firm squeeze before he straightens up and leans towards you, âThereâs no rush anymore.âÂ
âWho says? Iâm fleeing once we graduate.â Your teasing elicits an eye roll from the boy as he shakes his head.Â
Leaning over, he grazes his lips over your forehead as he mutters, âFunny, but no can do, youâre stuck with me.âÂ
His arms encircle you as he continues to drop light pecks to your face, clearly uncaring of the unconventional crane of his spine as he does so. Bringing a hand up, you place it on his cheek before leaning to join your lips together, acutely aware of how his hands tighten around your frame as he leans in impossibly closer to you.Â
Pulling back briefly, you smile as an idea balloons in your thoughts, âIâm going to need to find Lavender later.âÂ
Blaiseâs hands draw circles on your waist as he hums, âWhyâs that?âÂ
âI canât let you have all the fun, now can I? I have the perfect anonymous submission.â You grin brightly, tugging at his tie to draw him closer.Â
His eyebrows slowly raise at your words as he leans in, âYeah?âÂ
âYep. How does âBlaise Zabini is a terrible flirt and an even worse snogâ sound?âÂ
Blaise hums and drags you closer to him as a playful glint blazes across his lidded gaze, âIt sounds like Iâll have to change your mind before then.âÂ
âI agree.â You whisper just as his lips sink against yours again, the faint scent of his cologne swirling around you like a blanket as you lean back against the table.Â
And when morning rolls around, bringing clear skies and a new column of Hogwarts Anonymous, you can only shrug your shoulders when Susan practically slams the paper against your face in fervid question.Â
âHogwarts Anonymous. Submission 0283: Blaise Zabini is an alright snog.â
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