I Know I'm Not Funny Sorry - Blog Posts

Drakken Vs. Gen Z

So, hi. Yes, hello. It’s ME. This post is just something I thought up at swim practice at 6:30 in the morning. I believe that Dr. Drew Lipsky Drakken from the hit show Kim Possible would be ABSOLUTELY POWERLESS against we who are Generation Z for several reasons. These reasons include our slang, the fact that we’re kinda meaner than Kim is, we’re ABSOLUTELY more feral than she is, we’re pretty fucking gay, and our chaotic energy outweighs his.

First off, our slang would give him a whole mental breakdown. He barely understands KP universe slang which is the easiest slang to understand because of how you can figure it out without context. ”What’s the sitch?”, no brainer.  He struggles with that. Our slang? WE DON'T HAVE CONTEXT AND IT MAKES NO SENSE WITHOUT IT. THIS MAN WOULD COME INTO CONTACT WITH THE WORD YEET AND HAVE A WHOLE STROKE. It has a thousand meanings, Drakken would struggle with ONE. He’d be too busty losing it to stop us from stopping him.

Next, as we all know, Kim doesn't swear because it's a TV-G show. Plus she gives off a non-sweary vibe to me. We are not that kind. We would walk into the room and ROAST HIS ASS SO BAD, HE'D JUST QUIT. We'd fucking END HIM within seconds of entering the room. He’d try to talk shit and we’d look him in the eye and say some things he’d NEVER UNHEAR.

Third, Kim doesn't use lethal force or anything like that because once again, TV-G and she seems very polite. Gen Z would not fucking hesitate to take this man out if given the chance because WE ARE FERAL AS FUCK. As our good man Charlie Slimecicle says: "If you have a shot, take it." We would show up with baseball bats ready to KILL.

 This won’t even be much of a paragraph. Many of us are gay and would be too busy flirting with Shego to bother with him, making him offended and sad. 'Nuff said. 

Finally, let's be real. We wouldn't actually fight Drakken. We'd just work with him and team up with him, slowly taking over from inside the forth and overthrowing him until we finally have our coup. Then, we team up with Shego to take over the world ourselves. We are the true legends. This man would crumple before our overwhelming POWER.

As a treat, have some screenshots of the conversation I had with my good friend @baguette-whet​ about this.