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This is such an important take on the "Dead To Me" ending! Yeah, I know. The series is a dramedy and bad things are supposed to happen but I don't feel the final 3rd season really gives credit enough to Judy. Of course, good people die in horrific ways every day. Sometimes it seems that the better and purer a person, the more bad luck they have in life (yeah, I'm talking about reality here - sadly, this has been my experience too often by now). But this story about a very special friendship, a very close bond between two complex, layered female characters really did not deserve this ending. And to me, this whole "bury your guys" and "heteronormative happy ending the billionth" DOES seem kinda problematic. It's like there is no actual desire to commit to the bit and make room for true diversity in TV. It's like, in the ending, the female lead still has to find her happy-ever-after in a male protagonist, and there is this whole emphasis on a heteronormative, "traditional" family life. The bond between Jen and Judy was strong and wonderful and ran deep. There was literally no point in just killing her off. It maddens me that it seems that especially queer women in the media that are not "everybody's darling" always seem to have to pay some kind of price - it's the same with Marla Grayson in "I Care A Lot" - how often do male, heteronormative protagonists get away with atricious deeds?! Yeah, Marla is defo NOT a good person, but there seems to be a whole double-standard-thing going on. And I think the problem can be rooted to the simple fact that the whole entertainment business consists of people and in people in this society, there still is ingrained a whole bunch of problematic, toxic belief systems and stereotypes. I do hope that by raising our voices and questioning such storylines, there will be more happy endings for LGBTQIA+ characters. We deserve them as a community <3
Judy was a queer character in a queerplatonic relationship in which, after years of suffering, frustration and anxiety, she could have gotten to fulfill her dreams, having a family, raising three children, one of them from the very beginning, side by side with her partner.
I don't really care how neatly killing her fits into the bury your gays trope, but the truth is we could have gotten a beautiful, original, queerplatonic found-family ending in a show that entirely revolves around the unlikely but infinitely loving relationship of these two women, and instead we got heteronormative ending number 93837637373738338 and dead queer number 827266262727117.
It looks like true partnership between women, be it romantic or platonic, can never survive heteronormativity. One or both will die, one or both will marry a man and leave.
Truly unoriginal and disappointing. What was even the point of making Jen pregnant if they were never going to raise that child together. What was even the point of giving Judy cancer, just to further traumatize Jen after the death of her mother and husband, just to further traumatize the boys after the death of their dad.
Killing one of the main characters is always an easy way out, I know, it packs an emotional punch and fits the fact that the series is ending because it's the literal ending of the character, but jesus, isn't it the laziest most overused trope in the world. More so if they are women, more so if they are partners, more so if they are queer. Really didn't expect this show to end on such a disappointing note.
Judy deserved so much better. So did Jen and the boys. So did the whole narrative and so did the viewers who where invested in this series. What a total trainwreck.