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Chan: You mean Jisung is in trouble or Jisung is the trouble?
Changbin: I mean he’s either in trouble or he’s going to be one.
Minho: Looking good in that jeans, Sung.
Jisung: Eyes up here, Minho. I am more than just a piece of ass.
Jisung: Hey, Felix! Look at this art.
Jisung: *hands Felix his phone*
Felix: This is the front camera..
Felix:
Jisung:
Felix: OH MY GOD-
Jisung: The great thing about music is it, in fact, did not save your life.
Jisung: It gave you the strength and will power to save your own life by yourself.
Hyunjin: If you like me, raise your hand.
Jisung: What if i don’t like you though?
Hyunjin: Then raise your standard.
Changbin: Chan has every right to be pissed at me. I didn’t follow his orders and i screwed up the task.
Changbin: The only way to make things right is to do the worst most awful thing imaginable.
Jisung: *nods* Dip your penis in vinegar.
Changbin:
Jisung: Hey, Woojin-hyung!
Woojin: Okay, what the hell? Chan just called and said that you abandoned him to get a classified information from his computer.
Woojin:-and licked a roll of antique stamps.
Felix: The stamps were on me. I was curious of how old glue taste like.
Felix: Answer: it taste like a horse lollipop.
Felix: So..Chan-hyung, I have some news.
Chan: What. Happened.
Felix: Well, remember when you told me not to burn down our house?
Chan:
Chan: You burn down our house?
Felix: No!
Felix: I had the fire put out almost immediately!
Felix: I am 39 cheetos tall.
Chan: And why did you think you needed to measure your height in cheetos?
Felix: We were out of doritos.
[Might be pre-debut Hyunjin and Jisung at some point]
Hyunjin: Look, let’s just agree to say “I’m sorry” on the count of three.
Hyunjin: One, two, three.
Jisung:
Hyunjin:
Hyunjin: See? Now, i’m just dissapointed in both of us.
Seungmin: If you like looking at butts so much, why don’t you look in the mirror?
Jisung: Thank god you finally said that. I saw you write it in a note pad three hours ago.
Minho: 80% exhaustion, 10% sarcasm, 20% don’t care.
Woojin: That’s 110%.
Minho: 20% don’t care.
Woojin: Should’ve seen that coming.
Changbin: If i die, my funeral is gonna be the biggest party and you’re all invited.
Chan: “If.”
Seungmin: Great, the only party i’ve ever been invited to and he might not even die.
[at breakfast]
Jisung: What if instead of milk in my cereal, i put in coffee?
Chan, walking past him: What if you don’t?
Chan: You three. Explain. Now.
Hyunjin: It was Jisung.
Felix: It was Jisung.
Jisung:...It was me.
Chan: But like...it’s a lot.
Chan: Everything in my life is a hot mess right now.
Chan: I’m under so much pressure. I just can’t even.
Jeongin: I want to be a caterpillar.
Chan: Care to explain?
Jeongin: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.
Chan: You know that they have a lifespan of like two weeks right?
Jeongin: That’s another highlight.
Chang: Jeongin, nO-
Seungmin: Some people are like slinkies.
Chan: What?
Seungmin: Not really good for much but bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
Chan:
Chan: Please don’t push Changbin down the stairs.
Seungmin: You can’t stop me.
Felix: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We’ll hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to fight whoever else is under it.
Woojin: We are definitely NOT doing that.
Felix: Mistlefoe.
Woojin: No.
Seungmin: Rules were made to be broken, Chan-hyung.
Chan: Nothing is made to be broken, that doesn’t even make sense.
Felix: Piñatas.
Jisung: Glow stick.
Felix and Jisung: *high-fiving each other aggressively*
[in stray kids dorm]
Seungmin: Am i in hell?
Woojin: No, Seungmin. If you are in hell, you’d be on a throne and the devil would be packing.