Spencer Reid Overthinks - Blog Posts

“I think I love you.”

Ship: Spencer Reid/Derek Morgan

Summary: They’ve been dancing around each other for a while now, doing whatever it is that they are doing. Who knew all it would take for them to admit feelings deeper than completely platonic friendship would be a sleep deprived Spencer Reid (who has less of a verbal filter than he wishes he did)

A/N: this is also posted on my AO3 under the same account name (Sarcasm_with_a_side_of_fries)

Spencer Reid didn’t exactly have the greatest track record when it comes to his emotions (understanding them, recognizing them, having them in general). The emotions he has for one Derek Morgan are a jumbled mess of Christmas lights that he doesn’t have the time or patience to unravel.

Spencer Reid also doesn’t know what this is that they are doing. The game they are apparently playing where they dance around each other until a case hits too hard and they can’t sleep alone. They dance around each other until Spencer has a craving he can’t handle alone. They dance around each other until unwanted memories sneak up on Derek in the night.

They dance around each other until it’s two in the morning and someone shows up at someone's door with pizza. Then they’ll watch a movie and fall asleep tangled together and it’s totally *totally* platonic.

Straight people don’t spend this much time trying to convince themselves they are straight. The thought hits Spencer like a semi-truck without headlights on a dark night.

He panics for a little while, has what some may call a crisis. He writes his mother and battles with if he should or shouldn’t talk to JJ.

Then there’s a case and there’s no time to have a crisis because there’s sixteen dead teenage boys and no end in sight. The case goes from bad to worse and there’s no time to think about anything for two weeks while they chase around a psychotic killer. They lose four teenagers in the process but they save two. For some reason it doesn’t feel like enough, to save two when twenty are dead.

The jet ride back is awfully silent, no one says anything all too draining emotionally and physically. Spencer is tired when they land. Too tired to drive back to his apartment although he really should because trusting himself alone with Derek isn’t exactly something he’s up for.

“Woah pretty boy.” Derek murmurs reaching out and steadying him when he sways on the bottom step. “You cannot drive.”

“Yes I can.”

“Spencer you can’t walk down the jet stairs. How on earth do you expect to drive? Aren’t you the one who lectured me on sleep deprivation and blood alcohol level equivalents?”

“Well…” Spencer attempts to defended himself but falls short (although that may be because Derek has an arm around his waist and that is extremely distracting)

“Mhm.” Derek chuckles keeping his arm around Spencer’s waist as he leads him away. “Face it pretty boy, you're drunk on sleep deprivation.”

“Why do you call me that?” A question that in his right mind Spencer definitely never would have asked.

“Why do I call you pretty boy?” Derek asked. “Because you're a pretty boy.” The answer is simple enough and while Spencer clearly isn’t satisfied with it he doesn’t say anything more. As they arrive at Derek’s truck Spencer gets sleepier to the point Derek is practically carrying him. “You're gonna have to work with me here.” Derek tells him when it’s time to get him up into the car and Spencer whines. “You’re tired I know.”

“You’re warm.” Spencer mummers attempting to lean closer to Derek.

“My truck is warmer.” That apparently does the trick because when Derek helps Spencer up and into the seat this time he doesn’t protest.

“Did you know that originally trucks were only meant for short distances on farms and it wasn’t until… the 1960’s that they began to be designed for longer trips.” Spencer yawns when he finishes speaking but looks over at Derek expectantly.

“I did not know that, why do you know that? You’ve never had much interest in cars unless it’s lecturing one of us about the dangers of them.”

“Looked it up. You like cars.” Six words that stop Derek completely for a moment.

“Yeah, yeah I do.” Because what else is he supposed to say to that. The rest of the ride is quiet and at some point Spencer unbuckles to shuffle into the middle seat of the truck (immediately buckling back in) and rests his head against Derek’s shoulder which is so uncharacteristic Derek isn’t sure how to respond.

They pull into Derek’s driveway which means Derek pulling away from Spencer who whines much like he had earlier. “Tired.”

“I know.” Derek mummers. “Come on, you can sleep inside it’ll be more comfortable.”

Getting Spencer inside is a much more difficult task than Derek originally thought it would have been, but he manages to drag the half asleep genius inside. Derek considers dropping them both down onto the couch but then decides against it. There’s no much difference between sleeping on the couch and sleeping in his bed. Right?

Spencer tugs on his sweater and shirt when Derek drops him on the bed- so as the completely whooped person he is Derek helps him letting him redress into a pair of sweatpants and a tank top from his drawers. Derek pretends to not see Spencer staring at him when he quickly changes himself, because he’s tired and he doesn’t know what he’s doing.

“Derek?”

“Hmm.” The hum comes as the blanket is pulled back and the bed drips another body joining Spencer’s.

“I think I love you.” And wow that is most definitely not what he meant to say.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I think I love you too kid.” Spencer hums himself rolling closer to Derek, his eyes falling shut.

There’s a lot to talk about, a lot to discuss and in the morning he will most definitely panic about the words of his sleep addled brain. For now though, he can sleep peacefully content with the fact that Derek might love him too.