Tango Tek - Blog Posts

They aren’t in the right order and are kinda blurry but whatever it’s pixelized pet postal rahhhhh!!!!!!!

uhh I sketched this a month ago and forgor to post. But um here have them. Ignore the terrible quality I know this is a really bad drawing.

I just think that they are all neat. Idk man it came to me in a dream or whatever. Also I was rewatching esmp season 1 this time from Jimmy’s pov so now he is a fish. To me. And also to a lot of other people but I’m now one of them. Anyway yea idk what happened to Joel lol he just looks off and I can’t figure out why. I think maybe his head is too small. Or too big. One of the two, probably.

It took so long but I now have a Tango design. This is a huge milestone I spent four hours on this drawing but this was years in the making I’ve wanted to draw him for so long but didn’t have a design.

I kinda hate it, but I spent too long on this not to post it. Tango is one of my favorite lifers/hermits, but I literally never draw him because I can’t figure out a design I like. Also I tried a new thing where I drew it grayscale first and then colored underneath the shading, and idk how I feel about it, but it was fun so I might do it again. Also I’m in the early learning phases of learning how to draw semi-realistically so um ignore the fact that his face is real derpy. Also if anyone has seen tango’s nose he appears to be missing it and would probably like it back now.

grayscale ver under cut vvvvv

! Important PSA for car owners, check your tires, if you find bite marks and gnawing you may have a Tango infestation !

he is coming to eat your car. Feral little goblin man /pos. I’m loving Wild Life Tango’s whole let’s-be-a-menace-to-everyone-around-me arc.

(This entire post is /silly)

what if… dnd au but instead of them being heroes and adventures within the dnd universe, they are just a bunch of nerds playing tabletops rpgs together?

like, Tango is the dm who has spent forever crafting the perfect home brew campaign and is determined to make it the most amazing campaign any of them have ever been part of. He’s got the custom maps and characters figures and costumes and voices and one session he even brings in a fog machine for ambience. He’s like the perfect dm to a bunch of perfectly terrible players who will only encourage each others worst dnd habits.

Etho is the one whose been playing dnd since, like, edition 1, and who shows up to the first session of the campaign and starts describing his character and someone’s like “are you playing kakashi from naruto?” And Etho’s like “oh is that who this is? I just found it premade online and thought it sounded cool” and he’s got the emo backstory and looks real cool but is in reality not actually that good of a character and whoever made it horribly messed up the stat distribution but for some reason he always avoids death and it stuck with the underpowered not-kakashi for forever.

Joel is the murder hobo (it’s a dnd term guys trust) who tries to kill everything who also renames all his spells and weapons on dnd beyond to really silly things and then forgets what they were originally and needs someone to translate for him. He will always make sure things get out of hand, accidentally starting cults, making sure the party is always at least mildly morally gray, killing people left and right, aggressively shipping his character with other peoples jus because. He is the embodiment of chaotic neutral. (He says he is chaotic evil in the life series but I think he is more chaotic neutral because chaotic evil will cause chaos for the sake of evil and chaotic neutral will cause evil for the sake of chaos)

Bdubs is the one constantly trying to befriend everything, who also unnecessarily narrates everything he is doing (ex. “I Am RAISING my EYEBROWS at you!!!!”) and he has a million pets and always makes Tango explain what each one is doing at that moment every five seconds and is constantly yelling at Joel for killing everything while Joel is always yelling at him for befriending everything. He will argue that the dice are rigged if he rolls badly and 100% has one of those dice time out chairs and will be extremely superstitious about which dice he uses.

Jimmy is the one who keeps having really great ideas but really terrible luck with the dice rolls, and always manages to stumble into traps. He’s also the only one trying to actually follow the rules and remain completely in character, like everyone’s like “oh it’s probably over here!” And Jimmy’d be like “yeah WE know that but guys our characters wouldn’t!!!!!!!!” And he’s like the perfect player in terms of how nice and easy he makes it for Tango to dm but is terrible at the actual gameplay. He will loudly boast to the enemy that they are about to “get WRECKED, FOOLS!” And pulls out a spell that should kill them instantly if he rolls anything but a nat 1, and guess what he rolls lol.

Scar is the one whose character dies first session and he just picks up a pen, writes “jr” next to the character name, and shouts “I’ve come to avenge my father!” he’d also name his character something like “Hotstuff McSexyman” (if Joel doesn’t take that name first) but actually be surprisingly wholesome and moral, if kinda bad at combat. Extremely oblivious as a player, Tango has to spell out the answer for each puzzle and he will kill an ally genuinely thinking that it’s an enemy.

Grian is the one playing a firmly non-human character who has just the most normal guy core backstory, like “yeah I’m Clarence, I’m 45 with a wife and kids and I’m going on this adventure to celebrate my retirement.” But he’s like a lizard guy or something

Gem is the one who makes a really nice and sweet and normal dnd character and then combat starts and she takes out a magical great sword powerful enough to one shot the BBEG (it stands for big bad evil guy and it’s real dnd term. Gotta love nerd culture) and rolls a nat 20. She is also the only reliably sane one here (Grian goes about managing his sanity like he does shifts at the permit office, and Etho is sane but his character turns out actually to be pretty ineffective at, like, everything so there’s not much he can do except have the privilege of being driven insane rather than already being so. Everyone else is a maniac, some just their characters but not in real life, some are just as crazy “irl” [as in within the au] as their characters)

there is a lot more that could be done with this and a bunch of other people to include these are just the initial thoughts I had.

I know we usually use the crane wives as like the go-too fandom songs, and no hate there love the crane wives, but I also think it’s fun to consider other bands for fitting the life series. Like, I would love to see everyone taking their absolute favorite band and making a metaphorical conspiracy board with red yarn and a crazed look in their eyes as they stab the thing in the middle that all the string leads to and everything for how it connects to the life series. For instance, I love My Chemical Romance and I think their music fits really well with the life series, so here are six wips that I will hopefully improve upon and color later connecting some specific songs to, well, really just the bad boys and their double life pairings at the moment, just cause it worked out that way that those are the ones I got into posting shape first, but I have tons more in the works and I’m really excited to share^^! Also sorry for the really long rambling post lol

I’m probably most proud of the boat boys one, but over all I’m really proud of these in general and hope to finish this project at some point, although given the scale that I’m going for that might not be for a while lol. Also if you wish for me to elaborate on my choices, I will gladly do so!

songs below cut vvv

man guess the build was wild. I blame them for this mess:

…I may have gone a touch overboard with wedding dress. Tumblr killed the quality, which in turn is killing me cause I spent so long on that thing. Also I just realized that in this edition of guess the builds everyone is just in love with Jimmy. I feel bad for all the “relationship map” people rn, because with Jimmy and Joel’s marriage, now the joelycule and the Jimmycule have fused, and they have to redo all their charts.

also this outta context must be crazy.

Low quality doodles from my sketchbook

please don’t judge me. *disappears back to the pit of insanity from wence I came*

a partially rendered Tango wip! And you might be thinking, “but Ian, this doesn’t match any of your other drawings of Tango! In fact, every time you draw ANYONE, it’s a different design every single time! You’re so inconsistent!!!” And to that I cackle evilly and draw even more inconsistent designs. Hah. Take that. You thought you could criticize me and my indecision? Well, I laugh in the face of genuine and accurate criticism!! In fact, I’ll laugh right now! Hahahahhahahahahahh-

He’s so silly! He’s got a decked out 2 key around his neck because I love the idea of hermits having little mementos from past seasons, and he’s got some red stone dust on his sweatshirt, the silly! Also, all evil laughter and insults aside, I am going to try to come up with more consistent designs for all my favorite blorbos, so I guess consider this the first one, unless I change my mind, which is also likely.

also you get no background cause I’m lazy

A silly doodle. Unclear what possessed me to make this.

Honestly I’m so curious what exactly Tango saw to prompt him to share this with the world. But anyway, I had this idea in my head since I found Martyn’s tumblr page. It was just really funny to me to imagine Tango cowering in fear as Martyn’s just like “…you’re not even on my tumblr page…”