aj0elap0l0gist

Latest Posts by aj0elap0l0gist

Joel miller in a mafia run Austin, Texas. that’s it.

reblog with a spoiler for your wip with zero context. no context allowed.

Finally ended a situationship I should have ended 11 months ago. I’m kind of elated, but kind of sad.

Hi

hi hi!

I feel like retraumatizing myself today, so here’s a little blurb I wrote

TW: Joel’s death (offscreen)

summary: you’re all alone again.

you sat at your kitchen island, fiddling with the engagement ring Joel had found on a patrol in Cody. the small clock on the cream walls ticked, filling the quiet air. Joel was supposed to be back hours ago.

“shit,, you mumbled, and looked toward the door. standing up, you grabbed your travel bag, and opened the door, only freeing before you stepped out. in front of you stood Tommy, his hand raised to knock.

“goin’ somewhere?,, he asked quietly. his eyes were reddened, and he looked exhausted and emotionally drained. you tilted your head slowly.

“where’s Joel?,, you mumbled. Tommy sighed, his breath shaky, and looked down. he looked back up at you, and shook his head slowly.

“i’m so sorry,,

you knew what he meant. but that was impossible. Joel was always the most careful on patrols. like he did five years ago taking Ellie to those goddamn fireflies, he always took the highest precautions.

“that ain’t funny, Tommy.,, you breathed. Tommy opened his mouth to speak, but you put up a hand.

“get the hell off my property,, you hissed. Tommy started saying your name, but you cut him off, slamming the door in his face. Crumbling to the ground, you hid your face in your hands, sobs racking your body. For what seemed like forever, you sat against the door, holding yourself. Eventually, you moved to you and Joel’s shared bedroom, putting on his flannel and smelling the woodsy, cologne like scent that was left on it. Joel. Your Joel. Gone.

The next morning, you woke up, your eyes cracking open after being basically glued together by tears. You thought it was just a bad dream, and reached to the other side of the bed to hug your husband.

but he wasn’t there.

“Send Sarah my love.”

Craig mazin and Neil druckmann how about I send you to god.

had a dream last night that pixel Joel (part ||) was my dad (surrogate father) almost like Ellie and his relationship and I went to go hunt down Abby bc she almost killed him (he survived) and as I was leaving I said “love you, da- Joel.” And he just smiled and said “love you too, kiddo.”

fucking kill me now

-pixel Joel is dad and Pedro Joel is daddy-

I'm also in need of au of Harry Castillo x reader where he's a rich Duke or something and reader is a poor farmers daughter. Like where these fics at?! 😢😢

omg yes anon like please someone write them (i maybe will at some point but writers block has me in a chokehold)

Also hello and ty for being my first ask 💖💖💖

Need a Harry Castillo fic based off of million dollar man by Lana del Rey RNNN

yall I need to stop reading fanfiction bc why did I just remember that domestic!Joel miller isn’t at home waiting for me to arrive after my long ass day and wanting to comfort me????

Like running his hands through my hair while my head is on his lap and then helping me cook dinner after. UGH I NEED OLDER MEN

I love you. let's eat together. share a meal. I love you. squeeze my hand when this movie gets too emotional for you to bear alone. I love you. tell me all the things you've never told anyone else. I love you. it's okay if you kiss me with garlic on your breath. I love you, even when you get bad haircuts or shave your face. when your shirt has a stain or you left the window down in your car and it rained overnight. I love you. tell me how your parents fucked up and I'll tell you how mine did the same and yet we will still weep at their funerals. I love you. take me driving past midnight and show me we can still feel young even when we've made it to middle age together. I love you. let's never get another dog. I love you. thank you for doing those dishes. I love you. you're the only one who has ever made me feel worthy. I love you. thank you for knowing me. I love you. let's get married (again and again) i love you. i love you. I love you.

sigh

Dunno if I’m the only one with this person but I just encountered my first tumblr creep! Had the audacity to ask for my location after I specifically said I don’t dm and I only take asks bc of personal comfort!! Here they are so yall stay safe:

I'm not just a bitch, I'm a bitch with a backstory

HELP THAT WAS SO UNEXPECTED WHAT THE HELL 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

me after tlou episode 2

i wanna suck you like a danimal

Posted on Threads by the American Red Cross. Absolutely love this!

did this lil uquiz I found </3

BRUH

REVENGE // CHAPTER ONE

This fanfiction is technically a Ellie x fem! Reader, so just.. idk.. yeah keep that in mind. I actually wrote the original version a couple years ago, due to my hate for Abby, so here’s the warnings for chapter one:

WARNINGS: angst, Ellie being depressed, Ellie having PTSD, implied suicidal ideation (Ellie), reader DESPISING Abby

tags: use of y/n one time, pretty angsty, yk the deal

Lmk if I missed anything, and feel free to give constructive criticism!

REVENGE- CH.1 of ?

The wind blew gently through the oak trees that surrounded the beige ranch, like a shield. You sat, quiet, and contemplating. After Ellie had come back from Santa Barbara, she hadn’t been the same. Emotionally, and physically. With two fingers bitten off, and the already fading glint in her eyes gone, you didn’t know what to do. You knew why she hadn’t killed Abby on that beach. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less. You looked down at your hands, and sighed. 

For weeks, you had been taking care of Ellie, comforting her through every panic attack, every violent nightmare that had her screaming when she woke up. Pushing down your anger and grief, you put her first. While it wasn’t the healthiest thing in the world, it at least tamed the storm for a bit. But the thunder was starting to grow louder and quicker. You looked back at the front door, and stood up, closing your eyes for a moment. Walking in, you walked up to Ellie, who was drinking a glass of water. Wrapping your arms around her waist, you restsd your head on your shoulder. 

Hey, baby. You murmured, breathing in her citrusy scent. Ellie let out a sound of acknowlegdment in response. You took a breath, before gently turning her around to face you. 

Ells.. I.. I’m going to kill her. You said. Ellie looked at you blankly, the energy in her watercolor eyes gone. When it sank in, she shook her head. 

No. Ellie’s eyes narrowed. You looked at her pleadingly. 

Baby, I can’t just let her roam free after what she did-

Then I’m coming, too. You scoffed.

Like hell you are. Have you seen yourself? You don’t sleep. You barely eat. I need you here. Safe. You looked at her, your hand on her cheek. Ellie pushed your hand away, the warmth of her skin gone. 

You won’t be able to find her. She’s probably halfway across the world by now. Ellie said, taking a step back. You shook your head. 

Tommy has contacts. Maybe he knows-

Jesus Christ, Y/N. You know what? Fine. Get yourself killed. I could care less. Ellie snapped, and you took a step back. She’d never been like this to you. She’d never claimed that she didn’t care. But you brushed it off, a feeling of hurt settling in your gut. You took a step back, and walked into your shared bedroom. Quickly, you packed your bag, hesitating before reaching up onto the dresser retrieving Joel’s old revolver. It’d been a while since the gun saw the light of day, as you didn’t trust yourself to leave it out in the open around Ellie alone. You put the gun in your holster, and put your shotgun in the sleeve on your bag. Ellie was still standing at the counter, looking down at the ground. You sighed, kissing her cheek gently.

I’ll be back, baby. You mumbled, and left.

shoutouts:

@likesomeoneinlovee @pedgito @mssalo

@mrs-hardy-hunnam-butler-pascal @a-misfortune

holy shit this explanation made me see Abby in an entirely new light… and it’s so fucking real. good lord my hate for her just went from a devastating wildfire to a cataclysmic extinction event.

Abby is the worst person in TLOU HBO. She’s on par with David. I cannot and will not sympathize with her. I actually kind of regret how nice to her I was in Yearling now, glad she spent time with raiders, she deserved it.

big news (lowk not really)

surprise! I’m rewriting a fanfic from 2024 to help mourn my husband. The title?

REVENGE

chapter one out soon.

@pedgito @a7estrellas @likesomeoneinlovee

@hier--soir @a-misfortune @getitoutofmymindwrites

I’m so fucking done with TLOU S2. Fuck Craig Mazin. Fuck Neil Druckmann.

Spoilers and a shit load of swears ahead.

What the fuck do you mean that Joel tried to fucking get up? The fuck do you mean that Abby STABBED HIM IN THE NECK WITH THAT FUCKING GOLF CLUB?

Ellie should have killed that motherfucker. I sobbed last night. SOBBED. MY EYES ARE SORE. YOU KNOW HOW MUCH CRYING THAT TAKES???

I don’t know if I can finish this season. I really don’t know. And I might take a detox off of tumblr for a couple days. I’m not sure. I’m genuinely mourning, and that might sound fucking dramatic, but Joel Miller was the first character I actually truly loved. Not because he’s handsome, in a “omg so cute haha silly” way. In a way that I loved his story, and his dynamic with Ellie. I loved actually playing as him. Seeing him die like that was so fucking messed up.

how the fuck am I supposed to be on tumblr and not get tlou s2 spoilers???? like help I don’t want to see Abby get a fucking Joel in one

Fanfiction isn’t enough I need my favorite much older and traumatized fictional man to literally break my pelvis

i hate when i get a like and it’s sexysingledad69 and not ultraviolincefawn444

Raw. In the Monte Carlo. Raw. Over the hood of the Monte Carlo. Raw. On the kitchen table. Raw. Bent over the couch. Raw. On the bathroom sink. Raw. In an alleyway. Raw.

happy birthday to me /gen

the wonderful thing about Bucky is that you can ship him with anyone and it’s a great pairing.

MEMORIES AND FAMILY - A TLOU X FEM!READER

Tags: angst, violence, weapons (bombs and shit), little bit of blood, Ellie being sassy, Joel being southern, reader has southern accent, the entire hospital sequence (Marlene being an asshole), Joel being a grumpy old man, nightmares (very very brief), Ellie hating coffee

lmk if I missed anything 🥹

WORD COUNT: 2.5K

Age rec: 15+?? Idk it’s my first time

summary: the end of tlou p1 but you’re in it! oh, and there’s a bit of romantic tension but we’ll ignore it, right?

a/n: hiii, it’s bitter! I’m so glad to share this with yall, and I’m also really nervous. please don’t hate (but constructive criticism is encouraged). I hope you enjoy this, and also, that mark watney fanfic is coming I swear!!!!

———————————————————————

MEMORIES AND FAMILY

prologue (part one of idk)

‘S okay, you’re safe, you’re safe.

You breathed heavily, panicked as yet another nightmare jolted you awake. Joel held the back of your head, whispering reassurances that the clickers that ripped your arteries out were just a part of your permanently anxious subconscious. You looked at your best friend, tears brimming in your eyes, yet you managed a weak, reassuring smile that you were better. 

Same nightmare? Joel asked. You nodded, breathing in through your nose. 

Yeah, but ‘s okay, Joel, she whispered, as to not wake Ellie. The teenage redhead stirred slightly, rolling over in her sleeping bag. 

You sure, sweet pea? Joel asked. You nodded. 

We’re in the middle o’ nowhere, Joel. No clickers gonna find us here. Joel rolled his eyes and sighed, nodding at her to signal she should fall asleep. You lied back down, letting out a long breath before closing your eyes, the small fire crackling lowly. 

The next morning, the smell of stale coffee filled the forest air, and you woke up as Ellie groaned disgustedly.

 How do you drink this stuff? She covered herself with the blanket, trying to block the earthy smell from her nose. You sat up groggily, and smiled at Joel, who was busy mumbling grumpily under his breath about how coffee is the best thing anyone could ever drink and cooking a can of Chef Boyardee’s Ravioli on the makeshift camping stove. You yawned, and got up, rolling your sleeping bag up to prepare for another day of walking. 

C’mon, honey. ‘S time to get up. After we eat, we’re off. You said, nudging Ellie, who was still buried in her blanket. The teenager glared playfully at you before slowly rising, following suit as she put her stuff back in her pack. Joel whistled a high note from where he was cooking, and waved the two girls over.

 C’mon, eat before this food gets cold. Joel said, handing them both small travel plates filled with a rationed serving of the food. Ellie ate quickly, practically breathing in the pasta.

 Calm down, kiddo. Food ain’t goin’ anywhere. Joel laughed, and Ellie flipped him off playfully. 

It’s going in my stomach. She said, and Joel shrugged. You finished your food, smiling at the small family the three had become over the past 8 months. What started off as a simple job evolved into a bond that you didn’t  think could ever be replicated. After the group finished eating, they started again on their journey to find the Fireflies. For a while, the walk was quiet, save for the occasional stumble or painfully corny joke told by Ellie. 

Hey, I know you guys don’t really like talking about before, but what was your favorite food? Ellie asked curiously. You laughed, and Joel smiled. 

Our favorite food? Joel grinned, raising an eyebrow. Ellie sighed. 

Fine, sorry I asked, old man. You let out a low whistle. 

Wow, right for the jugular, huh, kid? You laughed. 

I don’ know about you, Joel, but I used to absolutely love Pop-Tarts. Ellie looked confused. 

What’s a Pop-Tart? You sighed dreamily, and looked up at the forest canopy. 

A Pop-Tart was this… packaged pastry. It had frosting on the top, an’ a filling inside. The best flavor was Strawberry, an’ no-one can tell me otherwise. You shook her head, smiling. Joel scoffed. 

Pop-Tarts were just straight sugar. Provided nothin’ for anyone’s health. You rolled your eyes. 

Oh, fine, Mr. Health Nut. What was your favorite food, then? You challenged him playfully. Joel sighed, thinking. 

Well, I’d hafta say the pancakes I used to get at the IHop near where my house was. They were softer than a cloud, an’ when you put syrup on them-

An’ you say I was unhealthy?

Hush up, will you? Never said I got ‘em every day.

Ellie smirked at the banter, and for a moment, it was as if they were simply on a camping trip, rather than a mission to potentially create a cure using Ellie’s blood.

A couple weeks later, the trio were walking through an old military camp from one of the first days of the Outbreak. You were quiet, your shoulders tensed. Ellie walked slightly ahead, and Joel walked with his best friend. 

You alright, sweet pea? He asked quietly. You nodded. 

Yeah, ‘m fine. Just.. ‘s weird bein’ here. Like a time capsule, but the size of a city block. You looked around. The tarp tents looked almost pathetic, in a way, as well as innocent. You scoffed, walking past the flimsy metal fence. 

Can’t believe we all thought we’d be safe in tarp tents. You shook your head, and Joel smiled softly. 

Yeah, I guess it is pretty ridiculous. The two went quiet, until Joel broke the silence again. 

Where were you? He asked. At your confused expression, he clarified his question. 

I mean, when the outbreak happened. You looked away, and at Ellie, who was looking at old binders. 

I was at home, in New Orleans. My mom left me an’ my 14-year old brother home alone while she went on a trip to Cancun with her boyfriend. I panicked, as we didn’t exactly have a car. We ended up packin’ one bag each an’ hopped on our bikes. We were goin’ as far as we could, an’ barely left the neighborhood when this Runner comes outta god-knows-where, an’ barrels into my brother. Instead o’ tryin’ to fight the said runner, I kept goin’ until I got to one o’ these camps like a coward. You went quiet, biting your lip to prevent the tears that threatened to fall. Joel put a hand on her shoulder. 

No, no, no, sweet pea. That ain’t your fault. You weren’ a coward. That’s another level o’ bravery. You couldn’t control where Runners came out from, or- or where your brother was at a specific moment in time. Joel said reassuringly, and Ellie walked over before you could respond.

 I think we’re getting close to the Fireflies, Joel. I found a stop sign with their symbol on it. Ellie said, jutting a thumb in the general direction of the said sign. You breathed in, looking at Joel and nodding. 

Well, let’s not keep ‘em waitin’, right? She said, smiling softly. Ellie smiled, and walked off, the two adults following her. Ellie turned back toward the two, and in her hand was No Pun Intended: Volume Too. 

I think, since I’m about to save the world, we need some jokes before I become too famous and never have time to talk to you two. Ellie grinned, and Joel rolled his eyes, nodding at her to continue. Ellie dramatically opened the book, clearing her throat.

People are making apocalypse jokes like there’s no tomorrow. She said, and you grimaced jokingly. 

Too soon? Ellie tilted her head. 

No, it’s topical, Joel butted in, smiling. Ellie flipped through a few other pages, until she grinned comically. 

Why did the scarecrow get an award? Ellie asked, looking expectantly at the two. Joel rolled his eyes. 

Uh… he was… outstanding in his field. Joel and you laughed at Ellie’s shocked expression. 

Did you read this? Ellie exclaimed incredulously. Joel shook his head, and you smiled. Suddenly, a click, followed by a hiss sounded behind them. Joel looked behind them, and spotted an air bomb. He quickly ducked, pushing you and Ellie to the ground as the boom filled the air, along with gas. You blinked, your ears ringing. You swore you heard Ellie yelling in the distance, but it sounded so far away. You started to get up, feeling dizzy, before you felt the hard butt of a gun connect with your skull.

You jolted awake, the overgrown outdoors replaced with an aged hospital room. You sat up, and Marlene sat in the chair, one leg up.

 Take it slow, You. My guys didn’t know who you were. You got hit pretty hard. You looked at Marlene, confused as to where Joel and Ellie were. 

Where am I? You asked, your voice hoarse. Marlene looked at the guard that stood at the door. 

St. Mary’s Hospital. She replied. You looked around.

Care to explain where Joel an’ Ellie are? She narrowed her eyes slightly. Marlene crossed her arms, matching her expression. 

Joel’s still asleep. As for Ellie.. she’s just starting to wake up. You looked at her for a moment. 

Can you take me to ‘em, or you gonna make me sit here an’ wait for the next moon landing? Marlene sighed. 

I can take you to Joel. But not Ellie. 

An’ why exactly is that?

Marlene closed her eyes. I don’t want her seeing anyone before surgery. She said the last word gently, almost meek in a way. You stood up. What the he- She was cut off by the guard, who pushed her to the ground. Marlene glared at him before nodding at the door. He took the hint and resumed his post. 

The doctors think that the cordyceps Ellie has have mutated. The cordyceps that tried infecting her when she got bit think she’s a cordycep, and it’s why she’s immune. If we can extract it from her, the doctors can replicate the mutation and- and make a cure. Your eyes widened slightly, the realization dawning on you.

Cordyceps grow inside the brain. She whispered. Marlene nodded. 

Find someone else.

 If I could, I would, but there is no one else. You looked down.

 So, you’re goin’ to kill her. For what, a 30% chance of this thing workin’? Marlene scoffed, and put her head in her hand. 

30% is better than 0, isn’t it? You glared at Marlene. 

You take me to her right now! To both of ‘em. You raised your voice, standing up. Marlene pulled her gun out of her holster, and aimed it at you.

Don’t make a stupid choice, You. You did your job. Let us do ours. Marlene warned. You took a step back. 

I didn’t know this job entailed killin’ a dang kid, Marlene.

Marlene lowered her gun, and looked at the guard. Make sure she doesn’t leave this place. She said sternly, and the guard nodded.

Next thing you knew, the sound of gunshots echoed through the hospital hall, and the guard at your door fell to the ground, limp. Joel opened the door, and pulled you into a quick hug, handing her the worn pack. 

C’mon, let’s go get our girl, huh? Joel said, giving you a shotgun. You smiled. 

Gladly, cowboy. The two charged through the hospital, shooting any Firefly that they came across. Quickly, Joel led You to the pediatric department, and they barged into the operating room. Gun aimed, they stared at the doctor and two nurses. 

All o’ you, turn around and put your hands up. You sternly said. The nurses followed orders, but the doctor panicked, picking up a scalpel. 

I- I can’t let you take her. He shakily said. Joel lifted his pistol and shot him, the nurses yelping fearfully. Joel quickly picked Ellie up off the table, disconnecting the various tubes from her arms. You quickly stopped the bleeding on your arm by putting on a few bandaids. The two quickly hurried out of the hospital, and headed down to the parking garage on the ground floor. You spotted an SUV, and they started to jog toward it, until a certain Firefly came around the corner. 

Joel, you don’t want to do this. Marlene said, her pistol raised. Joel stopped walking, and you stood slightly in front of him. 

You can still do the right thing. Both of you. Marlene breathed. 

We don’t kill kids. An’ either way, a little girl’s fate ain’t yours to decide, Marlene. You shook your head, and Marlene narrowed her eyes. 

It isn’t yours to decide either.  At that, Joel’s eyes flickered with acknowledgment. 

And you know it. Marlene tilted her head, tears in her eyes. You looked back at Joel. 

Go get her in the car, cowboy. You said. Joel shook his head, about to protest. 

I’ll be right behind you. Promise. 

Joel sighed, and reluctantly turned around, hurrying to the SUV. Once he was gone, you turned back to Marlene. 

He doesn’t know, does he-

That ain’t any of your business. Anyways, Joel and I got places to be. So, I’m afraid that I’m gonna have to kill you now.

Marlene’s eyes widened, and she took a step back, but before she got far, you shot her in the stomach. For a few moments, she begged for mercy, blood smeared on the ground.

You’d just come after her.

You and Joel sat in the front seats of the SUV, quiet. Joel rested his head on one hand as he drove, and you struggled to stay awake despite the sunniness. You and Joel both looked in the rear view mirror as they heard Ellie stir. The redhead sat up slowly, groggy from the anesthesia.

What happened?

You looked away from the rearview mirror, and Joel carried the conversation, framing the careful lie the two adults had crafted as truth. Ellie looked too tired and drained to be physically distraught, but the glint that faded from her eyes said it all. She let out a soft oh and lied back down on the backseat, facing the backrest and going back to sleep. Joel looked at you, who shrugged silently. He looked back at the road, and the rest of the drive out of Salt Lake City was silent.

TEN MILES AWAY FROM JACKSON, WYOMING

Joel huffed annoyedly, lifting his head from the hood of the old car. 

Well, looks like she’s tapped out. Gonna have to walk the rest of the way. Should only be a few hours though. We’ve done worse.

You smiled at your best friend, and nodded at Ellie. 

C’mon, kiddo. Don’t wanna be the last one back to civilization, right?

You said, and Ellie looked up from her scar, grinning. If Ellie was one thing, it was competitive. The two girls raced to the creek, and then to the tree they used to climb up onto the hill. Joel caught up, and they all started walking toward Jackson. 

Hey, wait.

You and Joel looked back at Ellie. Your smile dropped at Ellie’s somber expression, and she turned fully toward the teenager.

Back in Boston—back when I was bitten—I wasn't alone. My best friend was there. And she got bit too. We didn't know what to do. So… She says, "Let's just wait it out. Y'know, we can be all poetic and just lose our minds together." I'm still waiting for my turn.

Joel looked at Ellie sadly, and shook his head. 

None of that is on you, Ellie.

You nodded in support of his statement, and spoke up.

Both of us struggled for a long, long time with survivin’. But no matter what, you keep findin’ something to fight for. Now that might not be what you wanna-

Swear to me. Both of you. Swear to me that everything you said about the Fireflies is true.

You looked taken aback, as did Joel. But after a moment, they both nodded, and promised her. Ellie nodded slightly, and she hesitated for a minute, analyzing them. Finally, she sighed. 

Okay.