My Writing From When I Was Tripping Acid On Halloween. It's Not Much, But Most Of My Trip Was Just Smiling

Feels

It’s hard knowing what to feel Because nothing ever seems real But this sinking feeling Held up by a thin string That’s roped around my neck so tight When all I want is to pack up and take flight Down South for the winter This cold is too bitter

I’d rather see myself in golden California Smoking a cigarette filled with marijuana But that’s what got me in this mess So it’s time to put this to the test Just don’t ask the price I paid I must live with my quiet rage With standards so low, my day was just made Saved a bee drowning in my drink I want to fly but all I do is sink You can’t sting my flesh You’re kind of pain would leave me feeling refreshed

To think where I’d be without love Even when I always think I’m not enough Things aren’t perfect, but you’ve put me in limbo It’s better than hell, better than suicide, so Where do we go from here? I’m spilling lines that aren’t ever clear.

How can I write when my eyes see more than what's really there I thought I was stronger but I didn't know my heart was this bare When you can only stay up and keep nothing down Your body screams but misguided thoughts control the crown Reality is nothing but chemical levels and wavelengths To test your will and lack of strength Cheeks in blush that secretly flush out your will to stay alive Purple and blue never looked so cruel on calloused and bruised fingers Tasks that once were simple now make you tremble unless you pull the trigger Of that crystal pistol And watch days blur into one, until the final end when you look in the mirror Of a picture you haven’t seen in forever this clear Small shifts in appearance like sunken cheeks and vacant eyes Try to tell yourself it’s a better disguise

Can’t seem to sleep and too tired to weep At seven in the afternoon, half gone all along Watching with envy while I skip the rip on your bong Even if I could, my mouth can barely open With so many words that are still left unspoken

Arctic Monkeys on vinyl and my full, beautiful bowl Sydney Elizabeth. This is my kind of rainy afternoon.

Fun hangs with peanutbutterlung at Rope Mill yesterday.

Simple strokes

This is from months ago, but it was one of my more recent trips. We watched Crystal Fairy and the Magic Cactus.

home is whenever I'm with you

You can’t tell, but my face is rolling off and down the hall.

Went for a scenic walk, and got a little lost. Found these beauties, but at what cost?

she is my little ball of sunshine. Lucy