Jean: Is Something Burning?

I'm laughing so hard right now

Kidou, shining a flashlight under the bed: Gouenji, are you ready to come out yet and socialize with people?

Gouenji: *demonic screeching*

Kidou: Understandable, have a nice day.

Luca x Hide, please?

I ship it!!

It’s one of the background ships that I most like about the last season! I’m weak for ships of close friends 😂💜.

Rex asking alpha questions on how he raised littles because ahsoka is so small and he is basically her orivod/buir now.to Frodo’s delight that makes alpha basically ahsoka’s grandfather

Hahaha Fordo is such an instigator and we love him for it

I made myself laugh with the dialogue a few times so I hope it's as funny to everyone who reads it XD

Taglist: @a-lil-perspective @merspots @delta-the-mando @the-mandalorian-clone-lover @dudewhynotthis @jessesriduur uhh sorry to the people I forgot I'm so tired lmao

It doesn’t come as a surprise to Alpha that the 501st’s latest addition - Skywalker’s shadow, a Togrutan girl who doesn’t seem far removed from her first handling of a lightsaber - is every bit as inquisitive and brash as her Master was, not so long ago.

The details are hardly relevant, of course, but Alpha vividly remembers being frustrated and amused in turns by Skywalker’s antics when he was still Kenobi’s Padawan. So when Rex comes to him, looking half out of his mind with exasperation, Alpha finds his sympathy is greatly outweighed by amusement.

“I don’t know what to do with her,” Rex says plaintively when he’s finally exhausted every instance of Tano’s creativity somehow making its way into Torrent’s battle strategies.

“Same thing you would do with any cadet,” Alpha answers with a shrug. “It’s straightforward enough.”

“But that’s the thing - I have no idea what to do with a cadet, either,” Rex says, and there’s definitely a note of desperation in his voice now.

As per usual, Fordo decides it’s high time he contributes to the conversation. “You and Alpha are in the same boat, then.”

“Shabuir,” Alpha says, affronted. “I knew what I was doing.”

Fordo turns to Rex, grinning like the di’kut he is. “In that case, I’m sure Sev will have all kinds of advice for you.”

Fordo is entirely too clever for his own good, Alpha decides, but resolves to take it up with him later in the face of Rex’s distress. He really doesn’t have the first clue what to do with a scrappy little Padawan, but Rex doesn’t need to know that.

“Just do what Skywalker does,” Alpha finally says, and regrets it almost immediately. He may not know much about kids, but he’s pretty sure that if he were responsible for assigning a Padawan to a Master, Skywalker would be his last choice. “... or not.”

Luckily, Rex seems to be thinking along similar lines. “He’s got an unusual method. That’s how General Kenobi puts it, anyways.”

“Technically, his Padawan shouldn’t be your responsibility,” Alpha points out. “But seeing as it’s Skywalker…”

“I have to fill in the gaps,” Rex supplies diplomatically. “So how did you handle it on Kamino, then?”

“With a lot of swearing,” Fordo says, utterly shameless.

“With a lot of - no, not with a lot of swearing - well - with a lot of, uh… creativity.”

“He doesn’t like kids,” Fordo adds.

“I never said - cadets are a handful and you know it.”

“Don’t let him fool you,” Fordo continues, conveniently deaf to Alpha’s indignation but still grinning all the same. “He didn’t have the first clue what he was doing.”

“Are you done?” Alpha demands.

Fordo feigns concentration. “No, I don’t believe so.”

“Ne’johaa,” Alpha grumbles, then turns to Rex. “Just… make sure she doesn’t get killed.”

“You’ve really improved your bedside manner, ner vod.”

“I’m going to kill you,” Alpha promises. “She’ll be old enough to take care of herself soon enough,” he adds, returning to Rex. “Help her as needed and let her learn from her mistakes. Simple as that.”

Rex’s relief is palpable. “Help her. That, I can do. Thanks, Alpha.”

“Ba’gedet’ye. Now get out of here before Skywalker blows something else up.”

“I can see the headlines now,” Rex sighs, and unclips his helmet from his belt. “I’m sure I’ll be seeing you before too long, if those two keep going at the rate they do.”

“I’m sure,” Alpha agrees drily, and he can’t help but laugh at the look on Rex's face.

Rex makes his way out of the room. No sooner does the door close than Fordo turns to Alpha, a crooked grin spreading across his face once more.

Alpha lets out a sigh of his own. “I’ll bite. What?”

“So if Tano is Skywalker’s Padawan, and Rex is sort of like her buir… does that make you her ba’buir?”

“Fordo - ”

Star Wars AU where everything is the same except Anakin converses with himself when he’s about to do something dark-sidey like Gollum from Lord of the Rings.

Just—

Imagine—

Anakin, squatting on the floor while rubbing hands together: The Jedi are wicked, tricksy, false!

Anakin, in softer voice: No, not Master! Not Obi-Wan!

Anakin, growling and getting spit everywhere: Yes, precious… false! Obi-Wan will cheat you, hurt you, lie!

Anakin, whimpering: But Obi-Wan is my friend!

Anakin, growling again: You don’t have any friends! Nobody likes you!

Obi-Wan, yelling in exasperation from the other room: Anakin, dear, I promise I’m not trying to trick you, I just want to know what you want for dinner tonight!

I’m in the middle of watching Citadel Rescue (03x20) and can we just give a hand to the clone who got to ride Obi-Wan Kenobi. Henceforth he shall be known as Rhyder, since he wasn’t given a name. I’m pretty sure Rhyder survived, and I like to think that this moment gave him bragging rights for the rest of his life.

LIKE

GUYS

Imagine him bragging about it...to poor Commander Cody!!!

Question: Who wants a stupid AU idea?

Answer: Presumably you, since you're on my blog and that's about the only thing I write.

This AU contains references to sexual activity and not-quite-cannibalism, as well as attempted child murder (Obi-Wan's canon early padawanship)

So you know all those "Stewjoni are valued as sex slaves because they're dual sex and possibly mild empaths" AUs?

I want "Stewjoni are carnivorous species who are very attractive human-seeming individuals, but specifically as a hunting mechanism to draw in and trick prey, like mimic spiders."

(Someone on discord said 'like succubi?' and no. Nope. Succubi fuck to death. They gain energy from the act of sex. Stewjoni just fucking eat people.)

(Well, not anymore. It's impolite.)

(They have animal alternatives now.)

Obi-Wan is a very, very attractive man and all those things about his genitalia and sexual proficiency are true! But try to enslave a Stewjoni at your own peril, they're more disarming then a Zeltron and, unlike the Zeltron, their first instinct will be to eat you.

Does he eat people? Well, not usually! There are some close calls on Bandomeer and Melida/Daan, but he's not old enough to really be at full sexy yet, and "cute enough that nobody will hurt me because I'm baby" doesn't work on Xanatos (because darksider) or the Melida/Daan adults (because they're already killing so many kids).

He comes very, very close on Rattatak.

I want to say he rips someone's throat out with his teeth while undercover as Hardeen and Dooku is just very ?????????? about it. He thought this was undercover Kenobi but now he's not so sure because Kenobi would never be so uncivilized, right?

(It does put a different spin on him threatening to eat that shark dude.)

Anakin: You don't know what it's like to struggle with the Dark, Obi-Wan! Obi-Wan: Every time I have sex my hindbrain is whispering to me that I should eat my partner. It's not the same thing, but I can relate on it a bit.

Obi-Wan: My natural prey is humans. Anakin: ...what. [some time later] Ahsoka: I'm a carnivore! Obi-Wan: Ah, you're in good company. Ahsoka: ...? Anakin: He eats people. Obi-Wan: I MOST CERTAINLY DO NOT.

Obi-Wan: I am naturally inclined to eat people but I have never in my life done so on account of having been taught the innate value of life, and particularly that of a sapient beings, since toddlerhood. Anakin: I remember you ripping a man's face open with your teeth and eating the flesh you tore off as a power play when I was fifteen. Obi-Wan: I WAS IN HANDCUFFS AND HE WAS TRYING TO KILL YOU.

(Anakin 100% did not know that Obi-Wan wasn't human when Obi-Wan bit the dude's face off.)

Gelpenss: Obi-Wan very much wants to eat humanoids and unfortunately they ping his brain BEFORE the alternatives. He has NO innate dissuasion at the thought of eating human.

Atagotiak: Like, Anakin had realized Obi-Wan is more carnivorous than the baseline human, but... this is new. Anakin: Why didn't you tell me before? Obi-Wan: You were tiny! And Anxious! I didn't want you to think I might eat you!

I have no idea if Obi-Wan managed to distract Maul with the sexy. I assume he tried but did not succeed, just because that would be too much power, but it would be very funny if he did. Probably failed, though, and Qui-Gon's still dead. 😔

Qui-Gon insisted on Obi-Wan doing lots of meditation on the innate value of life throughout the entire padawancy.

That second art was just an excuse to draw Amaya’s full outfit

Thank you for this. This made my day

So, I feel like confessing something,,,

I don’t like Fudou portrayed as a punk.

I never liked it since the very early 2000s fashion choices of the show, it just didn’t feel right to me, something seemed out of place. And then Outer Code came around and finally I knew.

To me, Fudou dressed a certain way because he had no money to spend on trivial things like nice clothes, plus, he had to survive on the streets of a darker side of town and to deal with all sorts of bad people.

He couldn’t simply do that with a nice looking cardigan, could he?

He had to adapt to the habitat he was living in, much like a chameleon does to protect itself. Some things stayed with him, of course, he still was power hungry and ready to do anything but that is a completely different point from his fashion style of choice!

Yes he has a sharp tongue, is a sarcastic lil shit and surely knows how to pick a lock or survive in a fist fight, but those are all things he HAD to learn, not ones he actively choose to learn. Same thing goes for fashion choices.

I honestly headcanon for him to always have looked longingly at the windows of the nice shops uptown, secretly wanting for nothing but to relax in a fitting room with something more colourful, something that could make him feel like he didn’t have to always look mad at everything.

In this new universe he somehow had some more money and what did he do?

He bought white, purple, nice looking outfits almost all without any trace of punkness in them and he went to the hairdresser, not a barber shop, a hairdresser. And as far as the short tell us, he goes there pretty often.

So no, I don’t think Fudou owns a collection of knives or that he would wear black outfits or leather and dark makeup and overall be a street baddie because I don’t think that’s who he truly is.

He is someone who went through a lot and just wanted to sit back, wear pink, make his hair grow and help other kids like we saw in GO.

To me Fudou is yes sassy but also gentle as he writes love songs for Kidou on the acustic guitar. He knows how to send you k.o. but is happier cooking with Tobitaka. He was once a lone wolf but actually really love being sureounded by his friends. He wore cheap, dark looking clothes to be seen as someone to not mess with but just wanted to be a fashionista with lighter fun colours. He knows how to handle a knife perfectly but uses it only to cut gourmet food.

I know it’s funny to joke around and memes are cool, but I heavily dissociate from the heavy punk bad boy Fudou many seem to enjoy.

Not to say yall should stop seeing him like you do, take this as foor for thoughts and keep doing what you love. I know I’ll keep portraying him the way I always wanted, now that I can~

For the fairytale tropes: tricking a knowledge spirit. That just screams Jaster

“I will not help you find anything that is not already yours,” the spirit warns, and it’s a sharp thing, a threat.

Jaster doesn’t let himself be moved. “It is mine,” he says, and it’s more or less true—the Darksaber is his by right, by tradition, even if Tor is the one who holds it right now. Seeking out a Jedi, a being purely of the Force, is a risk, will test his ability to obfuscate, but to bring the Mandalorians together and end the civil war, it’s worth it.

The Zabrak stares at him for another long moment, then inclines his head. His body shimmers, and the unearthly blue bleeds away as he steps out of his Temple, approaches the edge of the stairs. Ghostly light becomes tan robes, dark skin, long black hair, and he steps out of the nexus of the Force where all Jedi live and into the real world.

“If it is yours, how was it taken from you?” he asks, and Jaster smiles.

“It’s an heirloom, and it was stolen long ago,” he says, precisely the truth. It simply wasn’t stolen from him. Tarre's descendants stole it from a Jedi Temple, long before the Jedi retreated fully into the Force.

The Jedi weighs his words for another moment, apparently finds truthfulness in them, and starts down the steps. Jaster falls in with him, trying not to stare, and asks, “You’ll help me retrieve it, then?”

“Your words are the truth,” the man says bluntly. “And in return, you have my word. I will remain until it is in your hands once more.”

Jaster doesn’t smirk, because that’s unbecoming, but he grins a little more widely than is likely seemly. “Thank you. I'm Jaster.”

“Agen,” the Jedi returns. “What was stolen from you, that you would go so far to retrieve it?”

“The Darksaber,” Jaster says, and now that he has Agen's word he doesn’t hesitate to admit it.

Agen stops dead, staring, and Jaster takes two more steps before he stops, turns, looks back. He raises a brow, still smiling, and says, “I never lied. Your word holds.”

There's a long, breathless moment, and then Agen snorts, amusement rising in his face. “You're correct,” he says. “My word is my bond, even now. You are clever with your words, Jaster Mereel.”

“And you are as quick as you are lovely,” Jaster returns, offering Agen his hand. Agen takes it, and Jaster wasn’t entirely sure what to expect of a Jedi, but his touch is warm, familiar, soft skin and calluses and a strong grip. He smiles, raising Agen's knuckles to his lips, and says, “Come, Agen. The Darksaber awaits.”

“Tarre will be most disappointed that he was not the one to answer your summons,” Agen says, and keeps walking down the stairs before Jaster can even begin to comprehend the implication that Tarre is still alive.