Reasons I Should Have Known I Was Aro, Number 37573:

Do you realize that Camp Half-blood is most probably a place full of juvenile delinquents? Like nearly all of them have committed a crime or two? If no, you should.

You know with ‘My adventures with Superman’ once again doing the old  “How could you lie to me?!” bit I have come to appreciate more and more the ‘Jazz Fenton method of dealing with discovering someone close to you is secretly a superhero.’

“Holy Crap he’s got these powers?! Actually now that I think about it I can see all the reasons why he’d prefer not to tell anyone about this. I’m not gonna bring it up unless there’s an emergency or he wants to talk about it first. In the meantime, if anyone asks where he is while he’s off fighting bad guys I’ll just tell them he’s at the library or something.”

Jason Todd, Son of Sally Jackson

Jason Todd is Sally Jackson’s Biological Child.

Jason has already become Red Hood but hasn’t revealed his identity to Bruce and the Batfam yet. Sally hasn’t married Gabriel Ugliano yet. Percy is 6 years old.

After reuniting, Sally & Jason bond over their violent sense of justice/self-defense and Sally learns combat from Jason to protect both her sons with deadly force.

After learning Jason’s identity as Red Hood and his reasoning behind becoming a Drug Lord, she becomes Jason’s business partner that co-leads his gang under the codename ‘Queen’.

Queen & Red Hood become extremely well-known protectors of children and abused single parents, opening many parent & children shelters funded by their gang.

Percy is the mob’s baby brother, ‘Guppy,’ because of growing up the son and brother of Gotham’s most successful crime lords. They always made sure he hid his identity with a hoodie and gas mask to disguise his voice with the bonus of protecting him from Scarecrow & Poison Ivy’s attacks.

After receiving Medusa’s head from Percy, Sally makes a new “statue” every month or so. She contacts abused single parents, kills them with the parent’s consent, and gives 3/4 of the money she makes to the parent. This “charity sculpting” is allegedly as a favor to her fellow “grieving” single parents. Weirdly enough, she still ends up killing Gabriel Ugliano, despite never marrying him.

Inspired by miagirl3’s “Avoiding the Secrets” on Ao3

Undercover Angel AU - Part 2

<- Part 1 - Part 3 ->

Still unsure about my Angel!Alastor design. Mostly just regarding his color palette. I like the idea of his Heaven colors being nearly opposite of his Hell colors. I also love the idea of his angel version being closer to how he looked when he was alive.

Tagged people and lined page below ⬇️

Just wanted to include the lined page cuz I like it.

@exvangelical-christian-nerd (cuz you asked to be tagged :3)

Also, link to an additional sketch of Angel!Alastor’s design

Anyway the history of orphanages in the UK and Ireland is a history of violence and in the 1920s, Tom would have been sent to a workhouse by about age 8 had he not been adopted (often this meant sold- sometimes over seas)

I think it’s really important when reading HP to remember that JKR is worse than just a terf. She erased a number of horrific, traumatic experiences (experiences that effected the ‘women’* and children she’s apparently so keen to protect) with how she wrote Voldemort’s childhood. In the 20s, orphanages still didn’t hold the babies, they were underfed and when they cried to much they were often quieted with Godfrey’s Treacle or similar products which essentially amounted to a sweet syrup mixed with opium. Many babies died and their bodies were often improperly disposed of.

At the time Orphanages would have been primarily religious institutions. Those that weren’t were for profit. State run orphanages did not exist. Some of these institutions literally stole babies from unwed/abandoned mothers like Merope. Some would even enslave the mothers in laundries. There are many horror stories of mothers begging for their children back even after their children had been homed, again often for a fee, because they were never notified about their children being placed with families. Children were beaten, dressed differently so they stood out, improperly schooled, shamed for the fact that their mothers failed them.

If JKR had written it according to actual history, it’s likely Merope would not have needed to die for her to be deemed unfit and Tom to have been taken. The reality is so much more horrifying than the happy orphanage in the books. And JKR still hasn’t looked into the actual history. She’s only visited modern orphanages and even that was enough to learn her this massive mistake.

These realities being as they are, it is hard to read HBP without feeling that Dumbledore is lying about Tom’s past, rearranging the facts to demonize him. The flashbacks even show Dumbledore antagonizing him like he’s a criminal for having maladaptive coping mechanisms from a traumatic childhood where he was even more different (autistic coded lbr) than the other kids and couldn’t manage to fit in within the orphanage let alone outside of it. And we see in that scene, Tom going from open and excited to closed off and recessed. He goes from thinking ‘this man is like me’ to thinking ‘this man is like them’. There is no way to ignore how Dumbledore immediately became part of the problem instead of offering a helping hand when it was needed most.

In conclusion, Dumbledore is an ass, Voldemort’s story is that of how trauma can ruin revolutionary thought, and JKR apologizing to the orphans/throwing money at them can’t make up for this massive mistake.

Historical fiction has a duty and a responsibility to accurately depict the horrors of the past. Please read Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell to see how this ought to be done in a low fantasy setting.

voldemort cowlick manifesto

Writing Prompt #14

"You foolish, stupid child," Vlad hisses, pinning Danny to the wall. Danny's eyes turn green as he wraps both his fists around the one Vlad has clenched in his collar, his feet dangling in the air. Vlad leans in, his own eyes burning red.

"When, exactly, did you plan on telling me your biological father was Bruce Wayne?" he says furiously.

Danny's hands drop in surprise. "W-What?" he gasps.

Vlad drops him unceremoniously and he lands on the floor in a heap. Vlad claws at the air in frustration.

"Don't lie to me, boy." Vlad says, omitting his often used possessive "my" in front of "boy".

"How do you know that?" Danny asks warily, propping himself up. He watches Vlad push a shaking hand through his hair. The man looks down at him before dropping in an ungainly squat beside him.

"Of all the sperm donors, Bruce Wayne, Daniel? Really?" The man asks, despairingly.

"I didn't exactly choose him, Vlad."

"No, I suppose you didn't."

"Seriously," Danny says, watching the man rock back on his heels as a growing pit forms in his stomach. "How did you know about him?"

Vlad's mouth twists bitterly. "Because he now knows about you."

"What do you—"

"Vladdy! Danno! What are the two of you doing on the floor?" Jack flops down beside them, a tray of freshly prepared fudge in his hands. "We having a heart-to-heart boys? Let me in on this!"

"Jack," Vlad says. "If you truly want to have a heart-to-heart with your son, I suggest you tell him the real reason I've come over today."

Jack's face falls.

"Vlad," Maddie says from behind him. "Thank you for coming. We're grateful for all you've done, but I think we can handle it from here."

"Madeline," Vlad says, rushing to his feet. "I must insist—"

"And I must insist you see yourself out," Maddie smiles tightly. "You know where the door is, don't you?"

"Mads," Jack says gently, looking between the two.

"I can show him out," Danny says, getting up as well.

"That's alright, Danny," Maddie says. "Why don't you go get your sister? We need to have a talk...as a family."

Danny glances at Vlad.

"Now, Danny," Maddie says. Danny heads for the stairs, pit growing ever larger.

--

The next time they meet it is Danny who has Vlad pinned, the gaudy chandelier above him shaking with the force of his rage.

"You should've told me," Danny growls.

"I thought your parents had you informed," Vlad says, utterly unbothered by the teen cracking what is thankfully not a load-bearing wall of his mansion. "Honestly Daniel, we could throw around allegations of deception on both sides, particularly mine as I assume you've known for quite some time now, if not the entire time, about your father hmm?"

Danny's eyes flick away in an obvious tell.

"Yes, I thought as much. But rather than whinging about being blindsided, I suggest we focus our energy on the solution."

Danny drops Vlad, barely biting back a snarl when the man lands gracefully on both feet.

"Which is?" Danny asks.

"First of all, your well-meaning but frankly moronic parents seem to believe that they can make a case for your custody without the assistance of my legal team. It is in both of our best interests to dissuade them of this."

"They don't like feeling indebted, Mom in particular."

"Well, to be crude for a moment Daniel, tough shit. Yes," Vlad says in response to Danny's widening eyes, "I said it. Bruce Wayne has the best of the best on his payroll and your parent's rinky-dink attorney from the local practice won't stand a chance against Friedman & Sons. Especially once he establishes paternity."

"He can do that?" Danny asks. "I mean I'm almost eighteen, can't I just refuse?"

"The keyword here, Daniel, is almost. As in, you are not. The judge can take your wishes into consideration, but I suspect Wayne will make a case for an unsafe living environment alongside his paternity to win his petition for full custody."

"Un-unsafe living environment?" Danny sputters. Vlad eyes the boy dryly before gesturing to all of him, currently clad in silver and black hazmat. Danny drops the transformation with a wince.

"In fact, I suspect that's the main reason the man filed in the first place," Vlad continues. "Lord knows he doesn't need anymore heirs to fight over his fortune once he passes—"

"Jesus, Vlad,"

"—so I believe he did some digging and found your home to be, well, wanting. On paper, Daniel, your parents sound eccentric at best, dangerous at worst. Pull the right strings, and hospital records just fall into laps. He probably thinks he's rescuing you." Vlad sneers. "If only he knew how quick you are to spit in the face of one offering you a comfortable and wealthy home."

"Fuck off," Danny says. "Is that what this is about? If you can't have me, no one can?"

Vlad rolls his eyes. "Come now, Daniel. Are you really intending to keep up this pretense?"

"What are you talking about?"

"We agreed a long time ago that no matter the nature of our quarrel, we would leave the Justice League out of it," Vlad says, taking a menacing step forward. "You think I, running in the circles I do, would have no knowledge of Bruce Wayne's alter-ego?" He takes another step, voice rising. "I have avoided drawing The Batman's attention for years, no matter how often our paths crossed. I stayed under his radar for decades, and now, BECAUSE OF YOU, I AM ABOUT TO BE RUINED."

With a creak and a groan, the chandelier drops, landing between them with a crash. Danny coughs from the dust as Vlad takes a heaving, calming breath.

"Then why get involved at all?" Danny asks, staring at the ground.

Vlad sighs, clapping his hands twice. Several ghosts dressed in service uniforms fly out the woodwork, gathering up bits of chandelier as others begin to mop.

"Because, little badger," Vlad says, walking away from the mess. "If we lose this, he'll have you in the palm of his hands. Which is infinitely worse."

Entering the kitchen, he pulls an open bottle of white out of the kitchen fridge and pours himself a glass, throwing a Fiji water to Danny who takes it for the peace offering it is.

"He won't."

"Won't what, Daniel? Please speak in full sentences."

"Won't have me," Danny says, letting a thin coat of frost spread over the bottle. He tips the freezing cold water into his mouth and wipes his face with his sleeve, mostly to see Vlad grimace.

"Why, because you'll run away if he wins? Until you turn eighteen? I won't have you fail to complete your education because of a cockamamie scheme, Daniel—"

"Because I have a solution, Vlad, one that doesn't involve the courts or running away."

"And what is that, exactly, Daniel?"

--

"You're going to leave my family alone."

"Danny," Mr. Wayne says, blinking in surprise at the boy on his doorstep and miles away from Illinois.

"I mean it," Danny says firmly. "You're going to drop your petition and whatever smear campaign you were planning on and leave the Fentons alone."

"Danny...why don't you come inside?"

Danny takes a step back from the manor's large doors. "You want a relationship with me? Brute force isn't the answer."

Bruce takes in the teenager, lanky but almost to his eye level. His eyes are clear and sharp, his demeanor forcibly calm.

"I debated whether going through the court was the right thing to do," Bruce says slowly, matching calm with calm. "But I wanted to be above board."

"Because my adoption wasn't?" Danny says, arms crossed. "Yeah, I'm aware. Kinda hard to adopt a kid that doesn't legally exist. And I know what you're going to say, the Fentons should've reported me to the system, but they didn't do it because I begged them not to. Because I didn't want my biological parents to find me."

"Danny..."

"You can swing your dick around and get your way, exactly the way I thought you would do things," Danny says, "Or you can have a relationship with me on my terms. A relationship where I don't despise you because you took me away from the people who've loved me no matter their faults."

"You're asking me to choose your happiness over your safety." Bruce says carefully.

"That's bullshit," Danny says. "I had a lab accident when I was fourteen and went directly against my parents' instructions. They trusted me, and I made a mistake."

"It's not a matter of trust. You were a child, Danny, and you almost died." Bruce says, not bothering to feign ignorance. Footsteps echo behind him.

"Bruce?" A voice calls. "Is that..?"

"Your son did die," Danny says. "He took a flight with your credit card to Ethiopia and got blown up. I bet you trusted him too."

Bruce reels back as a hand lands on his shoulder, the other on the door.

"Whoa, whoa, uh, Danny, right? I'm Tim, I'm—"

"I know who you are," Danny says, clenching his fists. Powering through the hurt he is causing. "I didn't come here to point out what a total hypocrite you are. I just want you to back off. And if you give me your number, we can text and I'll come to Gotham for Thanksgiving or the ski chalet in Vermont or your villa in where-the-fuck-ever and you can be Uncle Bruce that I maybe even tolerate being around once in a while. Just leave my family alone."

"Bruce, what is he talking about?" Tim asks. "Back off of what?"

"Your Dad is suing my parents for full custody," Danny says when it becomes clear Bruce isn't answering.

"What?" Tim hisses, turning to Bruce. "That isn't what we talked about!"

"Danny. I..."

"Here," Danny says, thrusting an index card forward that he's scrawled his phone number and email onto. On the other side is the past participle conjugation for 'venir'. "I won't answer until you drop the custody petition. Which I expect you to do by tomorrow morning."

"Done," Tim says, stepping past Bruce and taking the card. "Give me about noon to get it all squared away with the lawyers. Do you have a hotel? A way home? I'd be happy to reimburse your flight and accommodation."

"Overstepping already."

"Fair enough," Tim says coolly, raising his hands. "Our lawyers will reach out when it's settled."

"Great. Bye." Danny says, turning to leave. He waits until he hears the manor door close behind him before pulling out his cell phone.

Ring!

Ring!

"Hello?"

"It's done."

"What's done? Again, little badger, full sentences, I beg of you."

AppleRadio hires IMP to get gifts for Charlie

Charlie's knowledge of Earth began and ended in Eden. After living in Hell her whole life, she couldn't even comprehend a world where humans did not kill and maim each other out in the open.

Sinners often discarded their morality, because if you were in Hell -you'd already hit rock-bottom. She wants to remind sinners of their humanity and give them a bit of Earth in Hell.

But she wouldn't even know where to begin, what to bring to Hell, how to avoid being burned at the stake- (did humans still do that??)

Luckily her dad and hotelier separately overheard her frustrations and discovered IMP.

Lucifer comes up with a quick ew sinner disguise and heads on down to hire them to bring back Earth stuff. Everything goes well, but the trouble arrives when he goes to pick up the stuff IMP had brought back.

Alastor had stopped by and requested the same thing, so Blitzo decided to kill 2 sinners with 1 trip and have them come pick up their shit at the same time.

--

Lucifer strolls into IMP's office with his very bad sinner disguise in place like he hadn't spent the last 3 days in his workshop with no sleep. And then stops in his tracks once he actually sees him. Fucking Alastor.

"What are you doing here?"

"Why it seems we both had the very same idea for our darling daughter!"

"First off, MY daughter! Second of all-"

IMP watches this thinking they're a divorced couple with a daughter who really hate each other.

They eventually leave get kicked out with their merchandise and present their spoils to Charlie.

She loves it. And maybe could they pretty please find this one other thing a resident missed on Earth-Oh! Actually, Baxter wanted to test Earth materials against Hells could they maybe-?

They each leave for IMP with 2 very long lists.

Eve!Alastor AU with Fallen!Adam AU

Continuation of this post

A snake demon ascended to heaven, it's only fair that it's the first man that proves souls in heaven could also fall.

But of course, that wasn't quite correct.

Just like with the apple in Eden, it was Eve who had first eagerly jumped headfirst into sin. Consuming the apple and making a deal for access to hell; never thinking of the consequences.

That's how Adam thought of it in his more narcissistic moods. But in his fleeting self-reflective moments, he admitted that it was because she was more courageous, confident, and charming than he ever could be. And he loved her for it in the same measure that it made him insecure.

There was a reason both the women made for him had a personality that shown brighter than the light-bringer himself.

Eve did as she pleased, giving zero fucks about how others perceived her. When they'd both reunited in heaven, Adam observed how the angels saw Eve, they watched her like she was an equal. He was a joke to them, the second human to eat from the apple.

And now the second former angelic human soul to fall. What a fucking joke.

tbh one of my fav things in the knifes out series is that we have stereotypical 'genius' detective but that doesn't mean he has to be shut off and emotionally distant. he gets mad at injustice and tells ppl to shut the fuck up!!! sherlock bbc has poisoned the water supply for long enough nature is finally healing