Yeah So Today I Had To Go To Court And Appear In Front Of A Judge Who, Ever Since I Started Practicing,

Nah, it’s cool, in the year 2021 he’s an upper middle class white guy named Seightynn.

real subtle, guys

Ok let’s say all kids who want to go to college decide to join the military.

What y’all gonna do with all the kids with depression, or ADHD, or physical disabilities? They usually can’t enlist without a medical waiver, so what? You can’t go to college because you were born wrong, oops.

And what y’all gonna do when you have to train, arm, feed, and pay the salaries of millions of additional troops? And then pay for their college on top of that? Why don’t you save money and cut out the middle part, and just pay for the college?

Are y’all still gonna bitch about how China outpaces us in education and we don’t have a strong educated workforce, but you don’t want people to go to college unless they’re willing to get shot? Y’all gonna pretend this is a matter of “econ 101″ when you apparently didn’t sit through economics long enough to learn what a positive externality is?

It’s almost like conservatives react purely out of the spiteful attitude that “I had to pay for college/health care and it was hard for me, so everyone else must have to suffer as well.”

(edit: and I say this as someone with $200k debt from grad/law schools, and who would be fucking thrilled to see everyone younger than me go to school for free, and I’ll rant about that all day)

This was way more fun than it had any right to be.

Why no I’m not spending my Sunday night drinking beer and playing on Picrew, I’m a normal grown-ass adult

Everyone stop what you’re doing and create a magical you with this picrew

@thechaoscult @pluto-is-real @goswlogpncmcrfobpjstltruaqhtma42 @everyone

I’m from the same part of NC and I agree

I WILL END YOU IF YOU USE CHICKEN BREAST FOR CHICKEN AND DUMPLINGS

DON’T YOU FUCKING FORGET IT

Grandma poison water SNAPPED

Satan! How dare you! It completely ruins the book when you snap its spine! You. Are. A. Monster.

...Where is my fainting couch?

Satan: What's the difference between a child and a book?

Lucifer: *sigh* What is it now?

Satan: One doesn't scream when I snap it's spine.

And then they try to tell you about a “great business opportunity” and the chance to “be your own boss” and you have to fake explosive diarrhea to run away.

Ever had that awkward moment, where someone who was apparently in highschool with you tries to talk to you when they see you out at the shop or something, and you have no fuckin clue who they are? But you don't wanna be a dick 😅

Made a meme for the encounter I just had at the shop. 😂

Also MFW I send a brief to my supervisor and get back an all-caps email saying “I TOLD YOU TO STOP PUTTING COMMAS OUTSIDE THE QUOTATION MARKS DON’T DO THAT AGAIN”

Me, seeing fucking spelling errors in my shit that has already been reblogged:

🤣 Honestly. Its always basic shit to. I type too fast.

Lucifer knows he’s a G6, and I ain’t gonna trade him in for a Nissan.

I love me a (pea)cocky boi.

this was kinda hot tho ngl

Pro tip! Make a 1:1 solution of water and white vinegar and spray it on the pee spot. The vinegar should react with the ammonia in the urine and help neutralize the smell.

Mum and I let a stray cat into the house just now and he pissed on the curtain so we’ve been frantically trying to cover up the smell so Dad doesn’t tell us off.

I sprayed the scene of the crime with a load of dettol but now the whole room smells of that which is even more suspicious.

So I said to Mum: “what if he questions why it smells like a toilet in here now?”

To which she replied: “We’ll just tell him you farted so I had to light the candles but they weren’t enough.”

THANKS MUM

Having eaten scorpion, that actually doesn’t sound too bad. Like a bug-pub fusion snack!