With So Many People Suddenly Turning On This Guy I Am Giving An Award To The Real Ones Who Had To Fight

INFINITY TRAIN REFERENCE!!!

Also this is soooo cute 🙁💗 also the image of bill sneezing with his eye is so funny, and him being such a little shit was very in-character. Great read!

So bill can get drunk, like humans, so does that technically mean he can get sick like humans?? Can you please make either a oneshot or head cannons, with the reader taking care of Bill and he's just like "pft, what? I'm fine, how could me, an Almighty being of chaos get- *just fucking dies*"

A/N: For the sake of the technicalities of Bill's physical form, I'm making the reader be in the nightmare realm.

Warnings: Bill being Bill, fluff, not proofread, alcohol mention

Sick Day

You're sitting on the couch, quiet mornings at the henchmaniac clubhouse are rare and often short-lived. All of the henchmaniacs are preoccupied with trips or activities for the day- all of which are likely excuses to get away from Bill even if it's only for a little while. It's understandable really, he's been a bit more irritable recently.

The only reason you didn't leave was because Bill grew pathetically more disappointed as every single one of his "friends" left the clubhouse.

You sip from a can of interdimensional pit cola as you take advantage of the TV being free for the day to watch whatever mind numbing show about cgi fruits crosses the channel.

Tiny steps tap from the hallway. Bill must've woken up.

He grumbles and mutters random words under his breath, making his way to the kitchen. He sulks and droops, eye half-lidded.

Hm. He's probably still in his feels about the crew leaving for the day.

"Morning." You greet casually.

Bill turns to you and pauses, then his eye rolls back into his socket and turns into a mouth. He breathes in and what you assume is his version of sneezing happens.

Blue goo disperses into the air, coming together to form a bubble that floats up and sticks itself to the ceiling.

Sneezing, grogginess, irritableness, that probably means... "Bill, are you sick?"

Bill floats up and laughs, tone more nasally than usual, "Pft- what? How could me, an almighty being of chaos get-" he sneezes again, falling from the place he's floating and flat onto the ground.

...Guess you know what you're doing today.

---

Bill lays in a makeshift pillow fort, bundled in blankets and surrounded by cushions. To put it in nice terms, he's been fussy about this whole thing.

He's been refusing to cover his eye when he sneezes, withholding information about how his kind gets better, throwing the blankets and pillows away from him only to demand you make it "comfier," and outright insulting you.

"Bill, you need to take this medicine. It's a cure for all, it's approved by the Time Health Administration."

"Mm!" He shuts his eye tight and turns away, "No way Jose! You're not tricking me this time!"

"What do you mean this time???" You reach your hand out to touch one of his sides, "You're freezing! C'mon, this'll make you feel better, take it! It even has some alcohol in it, if you drink enough of it you might get drunk!"

"No!" He slaps the spoon you put the medicine on away.

"Ugh, Bill- Stop being such a brat and just drink the damn thing!"

He pulls the blanket over his top angle and tries to hide.

Maybe you need to like baby him or something? Make it fun? Here comes the airplane type stuff????

You look around for an idea or lead on what to do next. What would get this menace to take his damn medicine?

You notice a silly straw in the mess on the living room floor.

Huh, when did this get here?

Whatever. You plop the straw into the medicine bottle and hope it'll work.

"Bill, look! The- the um, straw, it's squiggly and stuff."

"Squiggly?" Bill slowly peeks out of the covers. He takes the medicine bottle from you but hesitates before taking a sip. "Do I really have to..?"

You double take. That's the most sincere sentence you've ever heard Bill Cipher speak.

You do your best to soften your voice to make sure he feels some sort of reassurance, "Yes. Yes, you have to, er, Billy?" Really? Pet names? That's what you're doing now?

Bill narrows his eye at you and snatches the medicine from your hand. He sips from the straw and throws the rest of it back at you. You duck just in time and the medicine hits the walls and spills onto the floor.

Clean-up is not going to be fun...

Bill sinks back into the blankets and continues to shiver. "You. Here." Bill pats the spot next to him. He glares when you raise a brow at him, "Did I stutter? Now! Oh and bring the TV remote while you're at it, doc."

You roll your eyes and scoot next to him with the remote in hand. "You could at least ask nicely."

"Nicely is me not threatening to set you on fire-" He sneezes again and another bubble joins the one already stuck to the ceiling. "Agh! These blankets are useless!"

Bill angrily flops into your lap. You raise your hands up defensively, "What- what are you doing?"

He exhales in frustration, "Stop being selfish and wrap your arms around me! Give me your body heat!"

"I don't think-"

"I could care less about what you think. Do it!" You awkwardly wrap your arms around him, pulling the blanket over the both of you and leaning against the pillow pile that's been made. "Now put something good on TV, I didn't threaten that cable company for nothing."

You put a cartoon on about some train that's infinite. Bill doesn't complain so you assume that it's passable.

The sick triangle laying on you closes his eye, breath slowing and boundless energy diminishing.

You also feel your breath slow, syncing with his. A small nap couldn't hurt...

Bill snuggles deeper into your arms as the hum of a familiar lullaby lulls the two of you to sleep.

We don't know a lot about how Bill's species reproduces so breeding kink could be really confusing for all parties involves. Exhibit A: Bill w/ partner that ids as female and has a uterus. He attempts dirty talk along the lines of "If we keep this up I'm gonna make you a daddy!" and they're like wait what

HAHAHAHA NO STOP, THATS SO FUNNY. Bill drops that line and the reader just stops what they’re doing for a second and is like, “..what?” In all seriousness though, you’re so right, it would be so confusing.

Honestly, I don’t imagine Bill’s geometrical species reproduce even CLOSE to how humans do. That’s one of the reasons I don’t think a breeding kink would be very probable, but I guess if we’re just having fun, maybe that’s what makes him interested in the whole process of like “human procreation.” Which might lead him to get a few facts wrong!

bro i hate living in ohio i thought a squirrel got trapped in my bathroom (again) but i opened the door to this absolute tomfoolery. do i need to involve cops or can i just call animal control?? idk how long it's been in there but if it fucked with my toothbrush ill be livid

(inspired by the lovely work of @squidflavoredsoup !!)

hiiii!! can you by any chance do a few dom!lila nsfw hcs (fem reader)? thank you soooo much!!

a/n — where my Lila girlies at, I need her so bad

summary — dom!Lila x f!Reader

✮⋆˙ Lila taking control in the bedroom happens more often than not, seeing as she has a dominant personality, it just kinda happens that way!

✮⋆˙ Loves teasing and toying with you, and will taunt of you for enjoying it.

✮⋆˙ Absolutely rough. She would just be very grabby and all of the place, touching you everywhere but very messily.

✮⋆˙ Probably would refer to herself as ‘mommy’ but it’s not like a serious kink. If you call her that she’d probably mock you.

✮⋆˙ She seems like the type of her who only cums when she’s on top, whether she has a strap or you do, or neither.

✮⋆˙ If you couldn’t tell, she’s probably be kinda mean. You know that fake-pity look she gave Diego when he was stuttering? That’s what you’re getting.

✮⋆˙ When she eats you out, it’s very sloppy, in a good way. She gets really hands on, buries her entire face in your pussy if she can.

✮⋆˙ Loves using toys on you.

What do you think Bill would do to purposely frustrate a powerful reader?

It’s Tough to be a God

a/n — I got another request about how this would affect ‘subspace’ for Bill, so that’s happening later 😁

warnings — SFW, toxic relationships, manipulation

summary — Bill Cipher x Powerful!Reader headcanons

⃤ A reader that’s more powerful Bill is something i’ve rarely seen touched on, but it would absolutely make for an interesting dynamic.

⃤ I’m not the first person to say he’d feel some kind of competition with the reader, but there would be a kind of rivalry there, powers-wise.

⃤ He wouldn’t be insecure, per se, but he wouldn’t particularly love the idea that you’re better than him. 

⃤ A more powerful reader would invoke a subtle sense of curiosity within him too; Why exactly are you more powerful, anyways? What can you do? How can he use it?

⃤ He’d definitely egg you on, ‘I bet you can’t do this’ etc, to see what you’re capable doing, and what powers you’re willing to ‘throw around.’

⃤ But when he’s trying to make you mad, there’s a multitude of things he can do. Being annoying is truly one of his specialties.

⃤ Obviously, nothing to far. He still needs you on his side. 

⃤ But you’d be doing something important and all of a sudden, someone is repeatedly poking your cheek. “boop.”

⃤ If you have an important job in the multiverse, he might purposely setback your work, hide papers, move things around. 

⃤ He’d start fights with other beings in your name, forcing you to confront them, and display exactly how mighty your power is.

⃤ And he does like watching you fight. 

⃤ Obviously, majority of his efforts would be secretive, as he doesn’t particularly want you to end him.

⃤ But when you do lash out at him, he finds it.. exciting. He’s not normally at other peoples mercy, and sometimes, it’s a thrill.

⃤ Just as long as he can tame the beast. 

⃤ Although, there is always the idea of the reader being the one pulling the strings, even if he doesn’t know it. 

hmmmm if you’re looking for stanford smut requests….. maybe expand on ford loving pegging? maybe throw in him getting called pretty boy to really wreck him?

- 🎩 anon!

A Night to Remember

a/n — Yeah, not my best work. But oh well.

warnings — implied Fem dom, dom reader, use of a strap, pegging, sub Ford **NOT PROOFREAD

summary — Reader and Ford try out pegging for the first time.

“Are you sure about this, dear?” Ford queried for the hundredth time that night.

You were almost done setting up with prep, getting ready to slide the first finger in. His weariness was almost laughable, “Yes, i’m sure. Are you?”

He looked taken aback—sounded taken aback, as he was already on fours for you. “What? Yes! Of course, I— I’ve been looking forward to this all week.”

It’s almost cute how unsure of himself he could still be, despite everything he’s been through. It’s in vulnerable moments like this you catch a glimpse of the insecure boy he once was. You try to call him down.

“So have I, baby—“ the pet name was well received, “—but you can relax. I’m gonna take good care of you.”

Your finger slipped into his asshole with ease because of the lubricant, and he shifted uneasily. “It might feel weird at first— But just get ready, sweetheart.”

“Right. Yes. Of course,” was his short response.

You worked on loosening him up for a little bit before you must have hit a spot he liked, because he sucked in a breath, “Oh.”

Gaining confidence, you kept moving. Twisting your fingers in and out, drawing soft moans from Ford.

Finally, his voice wavered, “Please.”

You took that as your queue, slipping your fingers out and replacing them with your strap. 

“Brace yourself,” You say as you slide into him, drawing out a whimper of approval from Ford. “Good, good.” You praise absentmindedly, beginning to find a pace.

You steady yourself and move inside him, not too fast, but not annoyingly slow. 

“M-more,” Ford mutters, “Please, love—“

So you speed up, and you begin to drive deeper into him. First your pace unsteady, but once you find a good place, Fords legs begin to shake. His breath hitches and he gasps for the sheets, groaning slightly.

You go on like that for a little bit, before deciding to, once again, lift your pace.

Ford whines your name. 

“You’re doing so good, sweet boy,” You thrust into him, “So well behaved, so perfect.”

He whimpers into the pillow, mumbling incoherently.

“And so pretty,” you add on, drawing out a long raspy whine from Ford.

“Ah— Y/n, dear lord—“ He whines, “Close, ‘m so very close.”

You drill into him now, daring him to reach his limit, a challenge he seems to gratefully accept.

“Anytime you want, sweet boy.” 

His breathing gets ragged, back arching with every thrust, and with one final whimper he releases, before collapsing onto the mattress.

You lay there with him for a few moments after ford flips onto his back. 

“Wanna get cleaned up?” You propose.

He breathes, “I think—“ a huff “—If we want to get full use out of the strap then… maybe a second round would be.. most productive.”

something something save a horse something something

okay i aint seen anyone ask... but i must. give me bonnie (bubblegum) headcannons or give me death (i will take marci ones too..) listen i just need some sapphic in my life

a/n — been sitting on this request for a while, but I LOVE princess bubblegum!!!!!

warnings — Mostly fluff headcanons, a few smutty ones, readers gender is never specified but this is definitely sapphic

summary — Princess Bubblegum x Reader Headcanons

SFW —

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Bubblegum isn’t new to relationships, but it is rare for her to develop real romantic feelings towards people, so count yourself lucky.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 A lot of the time, she’s caught up in her work. This doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about you, and she definitely takes precautions to show you.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Sometimes when she knows she’ll be working a while, she’ll send you little gift baskets full of things you like. (She did the calculations, all gift baskets must have at least an 92.77% chance of positively affecting you.)

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 She’s been fully independent since she was a little kid, so you have to be there to show her support.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Force her to take breaks, bring her breakfast in bed, personally deliver tea to her lab, and then insist of giving her company.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Because of her terribly formal and stressful princess duties, she would definitely prefer mundane dates rather than fancy ones.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Curling up on the couch after a long day and just binging stupid movies together.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Let her curl up into your side, she probably needs it, despite what she says.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 She would find it very attractive if your specifically good at a craft (art, dancing, etc..)

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Like if you’re a good cook, she’d love to watch you work. It’s kind of a science in itself right? She’s find it fascinating to watch you work.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 And yes, maybe she just likes when you do things for her.

NSFW —

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 Switch, but definitely more of a top. She clearly likes to be in control.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 She wouldn’t claim to be too kinky, but she is curious, so she’d be willing to try a lot of things.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 ‘Experimenting’ with your body, touching you everywhere, taking in your fascinating reactions.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 She doesn’t bottom easily unless there’s a lot of trust there, but from how much she works, it’d definitely do her good.

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 I could see her trying to lean back and let you take care of her after a long week, but only if you insist.

i wonder how bill would react to someone wanting him carnally

He’d probably be weirded out and then use it to his advantage. He sees the appeal though.

MROE MORE MORE MORE I I JSUT NEED MORE STANLEY BILL STANFORD AND FIDDLEFORD YOUR WIRIRNT IS SO FUCKIMG GOOD OH MY GOD KEEEP ON WRITING DONT STOP WHY R YOU SO TSENTEED!.!!,!,,, PIT ME IN A ROOM WITH ALL OF THEM AND I WONT BE THE ONE COMING OUT ORGENEATN OH MY FUKCJNG GODDD YOU AWTE SO AWRSOME

I love you and your writing, please do not suddenly disappear off the face of the earth. (ゝз○`)

I LOVE YOUR ENTHUSIASM. Also I’m going to take this request, since you seem to be specifically excited at the thought of more content, to talk about things i’ve been wanting to write!

[lalala PLEASE SEND REQUESTS lalala]

Bill with equally/exeedingly powerful reader is so interesting to me, there’d be so much competition there and the fact it’d probably be one sided on his part.

ANYTHING with young fiddleford, he’s such a cutie!! From his little hillbilly town omgmgmgmg he’s such a cute little nerd, I love him.

A full Stanford fic, those headcanons did pretty well so if I get a specific enough request i’d literally be ON IT.

I also have a fluffy Bill fic in drafts and that’s all i’ll say about that!

Alternatively in drafts, I have princess bubblegum headcanons. STARVING for adventure time requests, that kept me fed.

Also I’d like to do more with Stanley.. maybe smut this time?

OH and aside from gravity falls, Diego Hargreaves. Would love to fuck him. Him as a sub? Literally, i’m busting.

Lastly… pegging bill? I have nothing planned or in mind, but maybe this could go with the powerful reader. Dunno, but have ideas!