Ned: Did you bring Y/N?
Shuri, gesturing to Peter: No, but I brought the next best thing.
Ned: Peter? The next best thing would be MJ.
Peter: I would be offended, but MJ is freakishly strong.
Peter 1= Tom’s Peter
Peter 2= Tobey’s Peter
Peter 3= Andrew’s Peter
Peter 3: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?
Peter 1: Milfs.
Peter 2: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.
Peter 3 : Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???
Y/N: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.
Y/N: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.
Peter 2: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.
Peter 3 : WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—
Peter 3 : I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!
Y/N: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?
Peter 1: What? No! It isn't!
Y/N: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!
Peter 2: Y/N...
Y/N: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!
Peter 2: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.
Y/N: PETER 3 , DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!
Peter 3 : The word milf has been ruined for me.
Peter 1: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!
Peter 2: Y'all are dumbasses.
*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*
MJ: Thanks fam!
Harley: Oh no.
Peter: *cries* I love you too.
Ned: Sounds fake, but okay.
Y/N: *A flustered mess*
Shuri: Can I get a refund?
Store Worker: Would Miss Y/N L/N come to the front desk?
Y/N, arriving at the front desk: Hello, is there a problem?
Store Worker: *points to Sam and Bucky*
Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?
Sam and Bucky, simultaneously: We got lost :(
Y/N: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me—
Steve: Hey, what have you two been up to?
Thor: We were helping Y/N write their vows, but they kicked us out because Bucky was making inappropriate suggestions.
Bucky: How is “Loki, I love your sweet ass” inappropriate?
Y/N: If you had to choose between Steve and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Bucky: That depends, how much money are we talking about?
Steve: Bucky!
Y/N: 63 cents.
Bucky: …I’ll take the money.
Steve: BUCKY!!!
Natasha: All of your existences are confusing.
The Team: How so?
Natasha: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.
Y/N: What’s something you’re better than Bucky at?
Sam, without hesitation: Everything.
Peter, after a brief moment of thinking: Mario Kart.
Steve, sadly: Emotional Vulnerability
Loki: We need to get through this locked door. Thor, give me your credit card.
Thor: Here.
Loki, pocketing it: Thanks. Y/N, kick down the door.
Loki: I told Bucky their ears flush when they lie.
Y/N: Why?
Loki: Look.
Loki: Hey Bucky! Do you love us?
Bucky, covering their ears: No.
Y/N:
Hi! My name is Bethany, I’m 21 Years Old, and I write Marvel Quotes/One-Shots. I love you 3000
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