I Mean I’m Down. It Sounds Far More Educational Then All Of The Homework I’ve Received All Year. 

FUCKKK

DOES ANYONE KNOW THE USERNAME OF THE PERSON WHO WROTE THE JASPER HALE FIC ABOUT ROSALIES SISTER WHOSE A DEMIGOD AND IM PRETTY SURE ITS CALLED TITANIC- SHE WAS ON THE TITANIC AT LEAST B/C I CANT FIND IT ANYWHERE 

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH PLEASE TATTOO IT INTO MY EYEBALL SO I ALWAYS HAVE IT WITH ME

How to get fined and expose people | CL16

Charles Leclerc x detective! Reader

Summary: This is the story of how Charles Leclerc finds love, and brings down an entire corrupt organisation, but that's just the background plot. Not really though. Come for the plot, stay for the rookies.

Warning(s): Mild Language, Drivers being idiots, plotting schemes, the FIA is shit? But we've been known about that. Driver shenanigans. Y/N will be introduced next chapter actually.

Part 1 ~Series Masterlist~

"I'm in the business of misery, let's take it from the top."

Charles didn’t know why he agreed to this.

Probably because Carlos texted “mandatory group therapy at Lando's, bring snacks or fuck off” and then followed it with a thumbs-up emoji.

And Charles, being the responsible, curious idiot he was, thought "yes, therapy sounds lovely."

Instead, he found himself in the middle of a Monaco flat that smelled suspiciously spring rolls, and something that could only be described as “boy.”

Carlos was already there, legs stretched across Lando’s coffee table like he paid the mortgage.

Alex had brought a six-pack of something suspiciously non-alcoholic, which Max was side-eyeing like it had personally insulted his mother.

“So,” Lando said, flopping onto the couch beside Charles, “have you heard of this fucking absurdity they’re actually pushing forward with now?”

Max, who had his entire upper body halfway into the fridge, let out a groan. “You mean the swearing thing? Godverdomme. Bunch of fuckers," he poked his head out the fridge, "Lando! There’s no Red Bull in here. I hate this place.”

Lando didn’t even look up. “We don’t carry Red Bull in this house. This is a Monster Energy zone.”

“Fuck you, mate.” Max slammed the fridge door and grabbed a questionable-looking apple. “Hope your sink clogs.”

"Eat shit, Max"

Charles rubbed his face. “So we get fined for swearing ? Like... for real? Real money?”

“Real our money,” Alex chimed in. “Forty grand for a ‘fuck.’ Eighty if you say it while looking too sexy.”

Carlos snorted. “I’d be broke by lunch.”

“Cabrón,” Lando wheezed, “you’d be fined just for existing with that hair.”

That was when Charles looked over. Carlos’ hair really was… suspiciously shiny. Glossy, not greasy. Regal, almost. Did it move in the light? Was that a beam of sunshine catching it just so? It was giving shampoo commercial in the best, most infuriating way.

Carlos noticed him staring. Flicked his head just slightly, like a slow-mo ad.

“Don’t even try, mate. It’s genetics. L'Oréal Paris tried to bottle this, saying it was them.” He smirked.

“They failed. Obviously. No shampoo can handle this kind of fabulous.”

Alex nearly spit his drink. “Don’t let George hear you say that. He’ll sob into his Dyson.”

Carlos scoffed. “George can do all the Dyson-sponsored TikToks he wants. But this,” he gestured dramatically to his hair,

“this is art.”

“More like black magic,” Charles muttered.

Why did it feel like he was in an alternate reality?

Then, slightly louder, “Do you think they’d fine me if I told the FIA to go fuck themselves in song?”

“They’d probably double it,” Lando said. “Add royalties.”

“FIA peuvent aller se faire foutre,” Charles said, with all the elegance of a penguin.

“That’s the spirit!” Alex raised his glass. “European flair with a hint of rage.”

Max bit into his sad apple and frowned. “Seriously, where is the money going? Like... forty grand? For saying what 'shit'?”

He looked around. “That’s a new set of tires. That’s a Rolex. That’s a very, very expensive escort in Amsterdam.”

"....................."

Max shrugged. “What? I googled.”

“They never tell us anything,” Charles muttered. “All these fines. These ‘regulations.’ And not once do they show us receipts.”

There was a pause. Then, deadpan, Charles added, “Gosh, I wish we could just, you know, secretly pay someone to find out what the fuck they’re doing with our money.”

That got murmurs of agreement. Alex said something about shady Swiss bank accounts.

Then the Thai muttered, “bet they’re using it for private jet charters and...uh..body wax. Yes.”

Lando, unusually quiet, sat forward.

He looked at all of them, dead serious—well, as serious as Lando Norris could look while wearing socks with little racecars on them.

“I actually might know someone who can help us.”

Everyone froze. Even Max stopped chewing.

“You’re not joking,” Charles said, brow raised.

“No,” Lando said, eyes gleaming. “Not even a little bit.”

“Who?” Alex asked, suddenly intrigued.

Lando just grinned like the cat that swallowed the paddock. “Let’s just say… they’ve got the skills. And zero respect for authority.”

Charles leaned forward. “Are they hot?”

“Obviously,” Lando said. “I don’t work with amateurs.”

Max pointed the apple core at him. “If they get us arrested, I’m blaming you.”

“You’re Dutch. You’ll probably be the one who gets us in jail.”

"Why are you being racist towards me, oh my god"

"Shut up guys" Carlos groans.

Charles, for his part, leaned back and stared at the ceiling. This was insane. Utterly idiotic. Deeply illegal, maybe.

But also…

"I'm in" He says as he looks around at the faces of the drivers around him, all slowly starting to smile.

If I didn't know what was going on, I'd think it was creepy if they started smiling at me at the same time.

"Want a monster, Max?"

"Fuck off, Norris"

"I've got a monster, it's in my pa—"

"CARLOS!"

_________________________

From his window seat near the front of the jet, Charles Leclerc glanced over at the quietest part of the plane—a square foot of peace occupied by Jack Doohan, fully unconscious, hoodie over his face, and completely unaffected by the circus onboard.

Unfortunately, the rest of the jet was a violently different experience.

“I can literally just ask him,” Max growled, shoving a Red Bull can into the cupholder like it personally offended him. “He works for me. I pay him.”

“Ugh, you’re such a Libra,” Lando groaned, sprawled across his seat sideways, his feet on Carlos' lap, like a particularly irritating cat.

“That’s not the point, Maxie. It’s my secret mission. You get to be the muscle.”

“I’m literally a four-time world champion.”

“And yet you’ve got the mystery-solving skills of a wet paper towel.”

Max threw an empty redbull can at him. Lando caught it and aimed it perfectly at a bin, all while grinning at Max.

Max thinks if he kills Lando right now, everyone in the jet would be considered an accomplice and he wouldn't be alone in prison.

But the rookies have such bright futures ahead. His brain whispered to him. It sounded like GP.

So he just leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, trying to calm down.

één...twee..drie

Nearby, Oscar was curled up by the window, fast asleep like an angel in a hoodie.

Alex was standing in the aisle infront of his seat, camera up, trying desperately to snap embarrassing shots of Oscar sleeping—but George, unfortunately, was in the background of every shot, adjusting his own angles and muttering under his breath.

“Why do I look like a melted Victorian candle in every photo?” George scowled at his reflection in the mirror of his phone.

“Maybe you just have that vibe,” Alex said cheerfully. “Haunted British antique. Sort of works for you.”

“Oh, shut it.”

Meanwhile, the rookies had claimed the back half of the jet like a boarding school on wheels.

Kimi Antonelli and Ollie Bearman had found the mini wine bar and were crouched in front of it like they were preparing for battle.

Gabriel Bortoleto stood behind them, arms crossed, clearly helping—though his version of help might’ve just been reading the French labels out loud and offering strong opinions on corks.

“Guys, I’m just saying, this Bordeaux is probably older than us,” Gabriel murmured.

“Perfect,” Kimi said, yanking on the wine fridge handle like it had wronged him in a past life, it wouldn't budge.

Ollie opened another fridge and blinked at the vast array of redbull cans in it, "this bitch empty, just redbull," he turned to Kimi, "keep going, whatever is in there, it's sure to be iconic"

“It's sure to be Illegal,” muttered Liam Lawson from nearby, but he was distracted—he and Isack Hadjar were both gazing around the jet like tourists on a class trip. “I think this jet is bigger than my first apartment.”

“Mate, I think this jet is bigger than my entire family tree,” Isack replied.

Max sighed loudly, watching them from the aisle with arms crossed. “This is the first time my jet has ever felt so.… full.”

Lando didn’t even glance up from his phone. “That’s because you have no friends.”

“Fuck you, Lando.”

“See, this is why you don’t get invited to things.”

“You’re in my jet!”

“Yeah, and somehow still regretting letting you convince me to take it.”

Next to a silently cursing Max, Charles was doing his best not to lose his mind while getting absolutely obliterated by Carlos at chess.

“I don’t even know why you try anymore,” Carlos said smugly, adjusting a bishop with entirely too much confidence.

“You're not even that good,” Charles muttered, glaring at the board like it had personally insulted his family. “You just talk so much I forget what my next move is.”

“You’re doing amazing, sweetie,” Carlos cooed in a faux-dramatic voice, it reminded Charles of that one clip with Kris and Kylie Jenner.

“You already said that to Alex.”

Carlos smirked. “Are you jealous?”

Charles made a noise that was definitely not a denial and absolutely not a pout, then turned his attention toward Oscar, still asleep, and Alex, who was trying to get a picture of him,

but kept being photobombed by George adjusting his jawline and moving his hand through his hair.

“You’re ruining the shot with your hair, George,” Alex whined.

“My hair is the shot!” George snapped.

From the back, Ollie raised his voice over the chaos. “Guys! I can’t believe we’re actually doing this! Like, full-blown operation.”

The rookies nodded solemnly around him like this was the Avengers assembling.

“I heard about the driver strike,” Isack whispered reverently.

“Same,” Liam said. “Absolute carnage.”

The older drivers exchanged glances across the cabin.

Silent, knowing. They hadn’t meant to bring the rookies.

In fact, they'd specifically tried not to tell them. But somehow, all five of them had been at the airport when the group arrived—already packed, caffeinated, and suspiciously ready.

They probably have a group chat.

“Just how bad can it be?” Max muttered to no one in particular.

Which, in their language, meant incredibly bad. Catastrophic. Delicious.

Charles leaned toward Lando, still scowling from his chess loss, and asked, “This person we’re staying with... do they at least have air conditioning?”

Lando just smiled, far too pleased with himself.

“You’ll find out soon enough.”

Charles blinked. “You’re enjoying this too much.”

“Me?” Lando said. “Never.”

Max leaned over. “Can we please just land already. I swear if I don’t get on land soon, I’ll throw Lando out the door.”

“You wouldn’t,” the brit said, grinning. “You love me too much.”

Max growled. “I’d aim for the rocks.”

From the back of the jet came a loud crash.

“WHO GAVE KIMI A CORKSCREW?” someone yelled.

Charles closed his eyes.

This was fine. This was normal. It's only been two hours since the sunrise. This is normal.

This was definitely going to blow up on their faces.

________________________

The plane landed with a subtle bump and an ominous silence.

It wasn’t the silence of anticipation, or awe, or respect.

It was the silence of what the fuck is this.

Charles looked out the window, squinting against the blinding daylight.

Grass. Dirt. More grass. A single squirrel, maybe. And in the far, far distance—what looked like a manor? Or possibly a haunted vineyard. It was hard to say.

“Did we crash into a farm?” Max’s voice cut through the cabin, sharp and offended.

“Is this someone's private field? Where are the buildings? Where are the people? Why does it smell like hay?”

Charles blinked. “I think there’s an estate over there.” He pointed vaguely, like that would solve anything.

Carlos leaned over Charles’s shoulder. “Big house. Very big. Like… murder-for-inheritance-big.”

“Definitely too big,” Alex muttered. “It’s like, really far, two days of walking maybe.”

“You didn’t even bring extra snacks!” Isaack groaned, dragging his hoodie over his head like a defeated blanket ghost.

“My phone won’t load anything!” Liam added.

“Do you guys… not have Wi-Fi?” Gabriel asked, looking horrified, like someone had just said “dial-up internet.”

“Lando,” Carlos said calmly, turning in his seat, “you didn’t get us a driver’s lounge receiver?”

“You didn’t even ask for it, and because we’re not at a normal airport,” Lando said cheerfully. “We’re on a secret mission."

Then he frowned at everyone. “God, you’re all so entitled.”

Max looked like he was ready to commit violence. “You kidnapped me from my home and flew me to a barn.”

“It's not a barn,” Lando sniffed, perking up. “Oh! Look, the van's here.”

Everyone turned.

A huge black van rumbled down the dirt road, kicking up dust like it had emerged from the void. It was the kind of van that looked suspicious in a very Netflix docuseries sort of way.

Lando, inexplicably cheerful, clapped his hands. “Alright! Group up! Bags—well, don’t bother, they’ll get delivered. Everyone count off.”

He started pointing as the drivers started moving towards the exit. “Max, Jack, Carlos—rookies with Carlos please—they're you go Kimi —Carlos hold on to Ollie, he looks a bit peaky—Isack, Gabriel, Alex, George, Charles—” he hesitated.

Someone cleared their throat.

“Uh… guys?” said Liam awkwardly from the back. “I think Oscar’s still asleep.”

There was a beat of silence.

Carlos blinked. “We were going to leave a man behind.”

“Typical,” Max grunted. “McLaren drivers. Useless.”

“I’m right here,” Lando said.

“Exactly, I'm not talking about Oscar.”

"Gosh Max, you're so rude to me."

Jack yawned so hard his jaw cracked. Isack stumbled into Gabriel, who stumbled into Kimi, who was holding a bottle of Max’s $800 wine like it was a sippy cup.

Ollie was giggling at nothing.

Charles gave them all a long, quiet stare.

They were flushed. Sweaty. Slightly glassy-eyed. He could practically see the wine fumes floating around them like ghosts of bad decisions.

He pressed his fingers to his temples.

If one of these kids died of alcohol poisoning on his watch, he’d have to personally call their parents. Explaining things in English to Isaack Hadjar’s French-Algerian mother? He shuddered. He didn’t have the range.

But then he looked again.

They were… fine. A little wobbly. Very jetlagged. Possibly wine-poisoned. But alive.

“Surprisingly resilient,” he murmured.

“I once saw Kimi eat a whole jalapeño pepper at a press event,” George, whispered. “He’s built different.”

“Do we get Oscar or just—leave him?” Liam asked, visibly considering it.

“Oh my god,” Alex groaned. “We are the worst people.”

“I’ll get him,” Max said, turning back toward the jet.

“Wait,” Charles called. "Give him a bottle of water. And maybe tim tams, they're in my bag. He gets violent when he wakes up hungry.”

“I’m awake,” Oscar’s voice mumbled faintly from behind them, blanket around his shoulders like a sleepy gremlin.

“Jesus,” Max jumped. “Where did you come from?”

“Dreamland,” Oscar muttered. “Why is the ground moving?”

“It’s...not,” George said.

Oscar blinked. “Oh.”

The van honked.

Lando gestured like he was conducting an orchestra. “Alright, children. Into the mystery van. We’re going to meet someone very special.”

“Is it Santa?” Ollie asked, slightly slurring.

“I hope it’s a doctor,” Isack said.

“Or a therapist,” Gabriel muttered.

“Can I lie down?” Jack asked no one in particular.

Max pushed past everyone. “I swear to god, if this place we're staying at, doesn't have Redbull I’m suing you, Lando.”

Charles stepped off the jet last, the warm sun hitting him like a slap in the face. Dirt underfoot. Weird smells. A probably-haunted manor in the distance.

He sighed.

Carlos stood next to him, yawning. “So, do we trust this van?”

“No,” Charles said immediately. “But I’m too tired to care.”

Lando stood infront of all the drivers, and beamed at them.

“Welcome to phase two, bitches!”

Charles closed his eyes and whispered a prayer.

_______________________

Vrrrroooom.

The van jerked forward, spitting up gravel, and took off down the path like it had somewhere much more important to be.

Charles watched it vanish down the road with a rising sense of unease. “He just—he just left.”

“He LEFT?” Lando echoed, stepping out and raising his hands dramatically.

“I mean, yeah, obviously he left. That was the plan.”

“Wait, what do you mean that was the plan?” Carlos asked, frowning.

“I told him to drop us off and go. Y’know. In case someone was following us.”

“Following us?” Charles turned so fast he nearly pulled something. “Why would someone be following us? Lando what the actual fu—”

“I don’t know,” Lando shrugged. “Felt dramatic. Adds to the vibes.”

“Vibes?” Alex said, voice cracking. “We’re eleven drivers, some of whom are legally still teenagers, abandoned outside a giant murder mansion with no Wi-Fi or food, and your priority is vibes?”

The silence that followed was broken only by the distant sound of someone’s stomach growling. Possibly Isaack’s. Or Charles’, Hard to say.

The wind picked up. The ivy rustled.

The manor stood still and silent before them. Waiting.

Charles shoved his hands into his hoodie pocket and sighed.

“Fucking brilliant,” he muttered. “This is how horror movies start. And we’re the dumbass cast.”

"You think they will make a documentary about us if we go missing?" It was one of the rookies, one who didn't sound drunk, so maybe Jack or Liam.

Charles wasn't sure anymore.

He groaned out loud again.

It wasn't even noon yet.

___________________________________________

Thank you for reading!

If you liked this part, please leave a like, a comment and a reblog!

I wrote this before I got into the accident, and now I've decided this is going to be my coping muse. I'm doing better now, getting the electroshock therapy and I have gained a weird obsession with yogurt of all things. Love you all.

Also, for anyone who didn't see the post, the Taglist is closed (Don't want to make another one, I'm way too tired for all of that)

As an alternate option, You can follow the tag "Julie's F1 rambles" this tag will only have my works.

Jules♡

Taglist: @anamiad00msday @evie-119 @that-one-little-soybean @six-call @stressed-cherry @il0vereadingstuff @whatevenisthisxxxxx  @freyathehuntress @verstappen-leclerc-inchident @allthings-fandoms @larastark3107 @myescapefromthislife  @wertyuizxcvbnm @halleest @hs2016 @lucyysthings @justaf1girl @bernelflo @mendes-bae @chelseyyouraverageluigi @llando4norris @sid-is-gr8 @henna006 @hurtblossom @quinquinquincy @ts1mp0ne @spidercat-soccerfan @kodzuvk @wherethefuckisthething @hellowgoodbye @prttylight @l4ndonorizz @edgyficuselastica @charlesgirl16 @chloes-book-corner @1mverstappen @inchidentofftrack @blackmage24 @angelluv16 @alice-went-away @teamnovalak  @wierdflowerpower @sunshine-and-midnight-rain @maxswhore33 @glow-ish @lazybot @weekendlusting @milky-rose2 @sugarfreerbr @prttylight @martygraciesversion381

reblogging for future me 

I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?

HI darling,

I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:

Home

what the hell is a mortgage?

first apartment essentials checklist

how to care for cacti and succulents

the care and keeping of plants

Getting an apartment

Money

earn rewards by taking polls

how to coupon

what to do when you can’t pay your bills

see if you’re paying too much for your cell phone bill

how to save money

How to Balance a Check Book

How to do Your Own Taxes

Health

how to take care of yourself when you’re sick

things to bring to a doctor’s appointment

how to get free therapy

what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment

how to make a doctor’s appointment

how to pick a health insurance plan

how to avoid a hangover

a list of stress relievers

how to remove a splinter

Emergency

what to do if you get pulled over by a cop

a list of hotlines in a crisis

things to keep in your car in case of an emergency

how to do the heimlich maneuver

Job

time management

create a resume

find the right career

how to pick a major

how to avoid a hangover

how to interview for a job

how to stop procrastinating

How to write cover letters

Travel

ULTIMATE PACKING LIST

Traveling for Cheap

Travel Accessories

The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase

How To Read A Map

How to Apply For A Passport

How to Make A Travel Budget

Better You

read the news

leave your childhood traumas behind

how to quit smoking

how to knit

how to stop biting your nails

how to stop procrastinating

how to stop skipping breakfast

how to stop micromanaging

how to stop avoiding asking for help

how to stop swearing constantly

how to stop being a pushover

learn another language

how to improve your self-esteem

how to sew

learn how to embroider

how to love yourself

100 tips for life

Apartments/Houses/Moving

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 1: Are You Sure? (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 2: Finding the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 3: Questions to Ask about the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 4: Packing and Moving All of Your Shit (The Responsible One)

How to Protect Your Home Against Break-Ins (The Responsible One)

Education

How to Find a Fucking College (The Sudden Adult)

How to Find Some Fucking Money for College (The Sudden Adult)

What to Do When You Can’t Afford Your #1 Post-Secondary School (The Sudden Adult)

Stop Shitting on Community College Kids (Why Community College is Fucking Awesome) (The Responsible One)

How to Ask for a Recommendation Letter (The Responsible One)

How to Choose a College Major (The Sudden Adult)

Finances

How to Write a Goddamn Check (The Responsible One)

How to Convince Credit Companies You’re Not a Worthless Bag of Shit (The Responsible One)

Debit vs Credit (The Responsible One)

What to Do if Your Wallet is Stolen/Lost (The Sudden Adult)

Budgeting 101 (The Responsible One)

Important Tax Links to Know (The Responsible One)

How to Choose a Bank Without Screwing Yourself (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting

How to Write a Resume Like a Boss (The Responsible One)

How to Write a Cover Letter Someone Will Actually Read (The Responsible One)

How to Handle a Phone Interview without Fucking Up (The Responsible One)

10 Sites to Start Your Job Search (The Responsible One)

Life Skills

Staying in Touch with Friends/Family (The Sudden Adult)

Bar Etiquette (The Sudden Adult)

What to Do After a Car Accident (The Sudden Adult)

Grow Up and Buy Your Own Groceries (The Responsible One)

How to Survive Plane Trips (The Sudden Adult)

How to Make a List of Goals (The Responsible One)

How to Stop Whining and Make a Damn Appointment (The Responsible One)

Miscellaneous

What to Expect from the Hell that is Jury Duty (The Responsible One)

Relationships

Marriage: What the Fuck Does It Mean and How the Hell Do I Know When I’m Ready? (Guest post - The Northwest Adult)

How Fucked Are You for Moving In with Your Significant Other: An Interview with an Actual Real-Life Couple Living Together™ (mintypineapple  and catastrofries)

Travel & Vehicles

How to Winterize Your Piece of Shit Vehicle (The Responsible One)

How to Make Public Transportation Your Bitch (The Responsible One)

Other Blog Features

Apps for Asshats

Harsh Truths & Bitter Reminders

Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later

Apartments (or Life Skills) - How Not to Live in Filth (The Sudden Adult)

Finances - Tax Basics (The Responsible One)

Important Documents - How to Get a Copy of Your Birth Certificate (The Responsible One)

Important Documents - How to Get a Replacement ID (The Responsible One)

Health - How to Deal with a Chemical Burn (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting - List of Jobs Based on Social Interaction Levels (The Sudden Adult)

Job Hunting - How to Avoid Falling into a Pit of Despair While Job Hunting (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting - Questions to Ask in an Interview (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - First-Time Flying Tips (The Sudden Adult)

Life Skills - How to Ask a Good Question (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - Reasons to Take a Foreign Language (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - Opening a Bar Tab (The Sudden Adult)

Relationships - Long Distance Relationships: How to Stay in Contact (The Responsible One)

Adult Cheat Sheet:

what to do if your pet gets lost

removing stains from your carpet

how to know if you’re eligible for food stamps

throwing a dinner party

i’m pregnant, now what?

first aid tools to keep in your house

how to keep a clean kitchen

learning how to become independent from your parents

job interview tips

opening your first bank account

what to do if you lose your wallet

tips for cheap furniture

easy ways to cut your spending

selecting the right tires for your car

taking out your first loan

picking out the right credit card

how to get out of parking tickets

how to fix a leaky faucet

get all of your news in one place

getting rid of mice & rats in your house

when to go to the e.r.

buying your first home

how to buy your first stocks

guide to brewing coffee

first apartment essentials checklist

coping with a job you hate

30 books to read before you’re 30

what’s the deal with retirement?

difference between insurances

Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:

Reasons to move out of home

You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:

wishing to live independently

location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university

conflict with your parents

being asked to leave by your parents.

Issues to consider when moving out of home

It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:

Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.

Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.

Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.

Your parents may be worried

Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:

They may worry that you are not ready.

They may be sad because they will miss you.

They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.

They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.

Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.

Tips for a successful move

Tips include:

Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?

Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.

Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.

Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.

Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.

Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.

If your family home does not provide support

Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.

If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.

If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.

Where to get help

Your doctor

Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800

Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44

Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325

Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277

Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50

Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577

Things to remember

Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.

Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.

Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations. 

(source)

Keep me updated? xx

I'm not against superstar or well known actors in the Percy Jackson series. I would actually encourage it. but only under specific circumstances.

the demigods all have to be unknown kids because that's who they are the demigods aren't some mighty heroes of song, they're kids trying to survive in the modern world.

The gods on the other hand... now that's where you put the superstars. The names and faces everyone recognizes. The actors that always look so good that it's almost not human.

imagine watching a show with kids trying their best to act but child actors are only so good, they have acne, their scrawny their voice breaks here and there. And contrast that with putting a professional actor as a god. They look flawless, they're acting is flawless, and they have that air of better than you around them.

I want to see a dingy elevator full of sweaty tourists in the Hoover damn contrasted by Gal Gadot, flawless hair and makeup giving the tour. Henry Cavill all perfect cheekbones in a suit suggesting he will blast Percy before the profecy comes true. Morgan Freeman telling grover to take care of the wild.

not to mention that there is only one man on earth I would trust to play the god of revelry, wine, and parties. because if we don't get jack black as Dionysus we riot.

Random goon: Hey boss, were you the one to pick that name as an alias? And why this one?

Red Hood : I used to have another name, before... A long time ago. But that person is dead now. I get to choose for myself now, they can't take that from me. I won't let them.

Goon: Huh.

***

Random Goon: Say boss, why do you never take off your shirt in front of us?

Red Hood: Well uh, I actually have that really fucked scar on my chest and I'm not comfortable with...

Random Goon: Don't worry boss, we get it, you don't have to explain yourself to us.

***

Red Hood, high on some toxin: God, I wish my family...

Random Goon (on boss-sitting duty): why not try reaching out to them?

Red Hood: They would never accept me as I am now... They wouldn't agree with my so-called "life choices". Besides, they don't miss me, they miss the person they think I used to be... I wasn't even a man when I last saw them.

Random Goon: Damn boss, that sucks.

***

And then the goons throw the Red Hood a party on trans visibility day and Jason is so confused he straight up cries.

Wattpad, let’s talk

YO WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEVER LET ME UPDATE MY FUCKING STORY! FFS I JUST WANT THE EDITS I MAKE TO STAY! BUT NOOOOOO

HP headcannon

TW: A shit load of reading. tears, and feels, lots of them. Also this was inspired by the sentence in bold which I was going to use in my standardized test writing section. And this makes no sense chronologically (im adhd af alright.) 

Voting is important because if there was a vote then Sirius Black wouldn’t have spent 12 worthless years in Azkaban and harry wouldn’t have been raised in an abusive household rather with wolfstar dadfoot and mommy.

Harry would’ve known all about the marauders and by the time he enters Hogwarts he knows all the secret passages and where to find the map. He also knows where to hide from Filtch, prefects doing their rounds and teachers. Harry has long since been an animagus. He would’ve entered knowing all about his parents (siriusly all about them, good and the bad.) he would have entered being a pranking god and reusing some of his dads old tricks. Every time Harry  pranks he gets a howler from Sirius about how proud he in which sirius proceeds to flirt w Dumbledore, gossip w Minnie, tell Draco to tell his dad that he’s a bitch, also tell Draco that if he doesn’t stay over for christmas he will have to listen to Sirius sending a howler everyday of him singing, and then Sirius going on to roast tf outta snivellus and properly cuss him out (he also adds in some hair flips and talks ab how supperior he is.) Harry 100% would call minerva Minnie and Minnie would be like a grandma who visited a l l t h e t I m e. He would be a flying god by the time he enters Hogwarts and is immediately on the team (Sirius likes to credit himself but we all know it was Minnies excellent coaching.) In first year when he has to get the sorcerers stone he roasts tf outta voldy “I thought a bitch who couldn’t kill a fucking baby said sum,” “no literally mate you coulda just thrown me out the window but noooo,” “don’t talk to me till you get a nose you fuckin wanker.” Harry would’ve flirted with Dumbledore to get out of detentions. Harry would’ve grown up hearing stories about Regulas and about Sirius’s family and how he was brought up. Instead of shutting down Malfoy he would’ve frickin adopted him and they would be bffs; as close as Sirius and James. Malfoy would 100% join in on pranks and plan some of them but he would never get caught. Harry hating Lockhart and cONSTANTLY pranking him (almost as much as he pranks snivey) Harry constantly reminding him of how his uncles repeatedly outranked him for the hottest wizard award. When Harry is sorted he would’ve been a MAJOR hat stall because the hat would really push for him to be in his true house *cough cough slytherin* but harry doesn’t want to leave Malfoy, he also doesn’t want to leave Minnie nor does he want to leave his parents house (and uncles) and most of all, he doesn’t want ANYTHING to do with Snape. Instead he meets Ron and Mione in the house and introduces them to Draco, at first Draco really doesn’t like them but once he starts to know them he questions his families teaching (silently of course) and decides he doesn’t want to be like them. Harry being bffs with Nott, Zabini and Pansy (they were all actually crucial in the taking down of the dark lord. When Harry hangs out with them it's just all sass and sarcasm and dark jokes (the number of people they have SCARRED). Draco and Mione being the only responsible ones and help them study all the time. Draco and Harry never sitting separately and if they do they always find some other way to communicate. Draco and Harry sitting at each others house tables ALL THE TIME and it really pisses Snape off (that may or may not be why they do it.) Draco hating Snape with a passion and yelling at him whenever he’s mean to Mione. All four of them having nicknames for each other. Draco and Mione came up w a playbook together with long elaborate shit like “initiate Page 387 paragraph 4 up section 3 clause 12.” Draco and Mione tying for first every year. God help everyone when they start to compare owls. TH E S L E E P O V E R S. All of them spending so much time in the kitchens. Draco is soooo nice to house elves because of that and actually co-founds S.P.E.W. Draco and his Slytherin friends sleeping in the Gryffindor common rooms because the password is too bigoted and they refuse to say it. The golden trio promptly begins to help, Mione looks for a spell to reverse it, Harry and Ron forcefully trying to remove the portrait meanwhile Neville brings snacks, blankets and says that they did a good job (Neville also being the one the Slytherins go to when they feel bad because of blood supremacy, Neville promptly reminding them that the fact that you feel bad and refuse it shows how good you truly are.) All of them are Neville defence squad and Neville supremacy 100%. They all repeatedly tell him how they would die for him. Draco hating Bellatrix for what he did to Neville. Draco and Harry immediately trade schedules to see what classes they share and swapping common room passwords. Draco is actually an heir of Slytherin but they all know its not him doing the attacks. Draco being with Harry in the chamber and trying his best to call off the basilisk while also telling Tom how he disgraces the Slytherin name. Draco being so nice to muggle-borns and creates a club where he helps them adjust to the Wizarding World (Sirius hears and promptly send sweets and howlers about how proud he is saying “I knew he was good oh you Lucius spawn you I’m so proud.”) Draco being really happy because Sirius knows that the Sacred 28 families look down upon affection so he doesn’t get told this by his parents. Sirius dotes on Draco always giving him affection because of this. The first time it happened Draco was like “what is this” and the golden trio’s heart broke, from then on they always display physical affection to him, hand holding, hugs forehead kisses, pet names you name it.) Draco also crying a lot because it’s the first time he’s had this since he was like 2 and doesn’t think he deserves it because of how his parents are. Draco threatening anyone who says shit about any of them and the four being as close as the marauders (so much so that all the teachers have flashbacks and ptsd from all the pranks.) Harry H A T I N G Snape for all the shit he did and calling him snivellus. Sirius hears and cries because he’s so fucking proud. Harry having to be held back from tackling Snape anytime he makes a lily reference. God have mercy for anyone who was unfortunate enough to be there when he saw snapes patronus because “it’s not love you nazi bitch! you fucking betrayed her and then got all but hurt you stalker esque bitch.” Remus literally keeping Sirius 100% in the loop when he is dada teacher man knows everything going on. Harry going to Hogsmade only to see Sirius “coincidentally” there. Sirius and Draco actually having a lot in common and Sirius completely loves the kid like wtf he’s Malfoy blood I have to hate him. When Voldey returns Draco beating up anyone who calls Harry a liar. Draco working as a spy for the order and doing little undetected acts of rebellion to help Harry. Instead of outright trying to be disowned Draco just uses everything to his advantage and is on the umbitch (Draco came up w the name) too spy yet again and healing anyone who had to use the fucking quill. In seventh year Draco and Neville begin to really work together and really like each other (platonically though) but god they are so FUCKING SARCASTIC WHEN THEY’RE TOGETHER. Draco teaching Occulmency and how to pretend like you're being Cruciod. Draco and Neville being actual besties. At the battle of Hogwarts Draco saving both Sirius and Remus and calls them both dad (they both teared up a LOT.) In the battle of Hogwarts Sirius shows up and fuckin runs over voldy w his motorcycle, Sirius also bringing a machine gun and going insane. Draco ends up killing nagini and his aunt. Draco also being known as a savior.

Screenshot redraw (somewhat)!!!!!! That one frame where Nightwing holds boba and Jason looks so done lives in my head rent free