I Know That I'm Healing When I Realized That I Don't Want To Die Anymore. I Realized That There Are Still

Will you ever come back?

i don't know how i can describe you

you're like my guardian angel who suddenly flew

leaving me overwhelmed by your greatness

since then, looking for you became my quest

you became my anchor to the real world

in the midst of coals, you became my gold

i hold on to you with everything i have

i lay at your feet all that i love

you made me happy like i thought i'd never be

in my own tiny prison, you set me free

right then, i thought something might last

but as i turn around, you became my past

as i sat there, feeling numb

i ask myself, how i can be so dumb?

that i have never realized, you were there only for a season

that you only came to teach me a painful lesson.

-D.G. Gir// 04/04/2018

Lies

I was watching the moon up in the sky

As I sat up and sigh

I told the stars I'm letting you go

That it hurts, but I have to grow

I hope the whispered message reaches you

I forgive you and I'll learn to forgive myself too

Though I know I'll miss you forever

I accepted that things end, connections sever

And I wish, I wish someday when we meet

I can smile and say I'm happy without lying through my teeth.

My cousin made me bookmarks with quotes from my favorite characters and people. 📖🔖📚💙

Innocence Lost

My heart clenches as if it can still feel

Can still discern what's right, what's real

But I know better, it was torn

The day it fell for you, I was reborn

I can still feel the phantom beating

I can still hear the echoes of footsteps receding

The day it fell for you, I was reborn

That was the last day in my sleeve, it was worn.

Afloat

I'm in a perpetual state of numbness

Forgotten how to feel, how to be

I only have my pen as a witness

Stranded in this strange, bleak sea

I have been alone in this boat for so long

Plugging holes with paper

Coldness seeping to the pages and my bones

My oars swallowed by the water

Maybe I'd let this sink in the deeps below

Release the burdens of sorrow

And I'll be free, unencumbered by tomorrow.

Guest

I've swallowed my pride and spat my feelings out

Told you things no one cares to know about

You knocked down my walls and I stripped my armor

Opened the windows, welcomed you to my doors

We were happy, explored the rooms together

Built new ones, through the gardens we wander

Yet as I offer you a permanent place, you refuse

You're my story but I'm not your muse

Told me you were only having fun and passing through

A temporary shelter, until you find someplace better suited for you.

Tired

We dream, we love, we cry

We live, we strive, we die

No matter what, it's the same fucking cycle

Long bloody wars, the never-ending battles

And I want out, I want to run away

From the life I'm doomed, from the words they have to say

So go on, pull that trigger

Maybe in death, there is something better.