Silly Dsmp Au Where Every Character On The Server Is Forced To Play A Monthly Game Of Among Us In A Circle.

“People are inherently terrible” no!!! Have you ever seen a child wait for their friend while they tie their shoelaces? Have you ever known someone who would bring hurt squirrels and rabbits and mice to the nearest vet just so it doesn’t suffer? Have you seen someone grieve? Have you ever read something that hit your heart like a freight train? Have you looked at the stars and felt an unexplainable joy? Have you ever baked bread? Have you shared a meal with a friend? Have you not seen it? All the love? All the good? I know it’s hard to see sometimes, I know there’s pain everywhere. But look, there’s a child helping another up after a hard fall. Look, there’s someone giving their umbrella to a stranger. Look, there’s someone admiring the spring flowers. Look, there’s good, there’s good, there’s good. Look!!!!

that would be reaaally funny though 

Edgar Allan Poe: Sitcom where people gradually get killed off and their spot in the opening title theme is replaced with dead silence.

Lenore: I’d like to question your definition of sitcom.

AU where the Dream SMP is literally just. Dream’s house, and everything else is the same. He invites his closest friends to be roommates. He invites a few people over for a party and they don’t leave. Wilbur announces the attic is claiming independence and won’t move out. Tommy and Tubbo steal Dream’s i-pod even though it only has two songs and become outraged when he tries to take it back. Dream can’t make anyone leave but he can exile Tommy to the spare bedroom closet. Jack Manifold has somehow been stabbed, buried in the garden, and crawled back out alive and well. Snowchester is the kitchen and Las Nevadas is the room with a pool table and Techno and Phil sleep in tents on the front lawn. Sam and Quackity conspire to lock Dream in a shed they built out back. It doesn’t occur to anyone that they shouldn’t murder each other over a house

i had to write something for this LMAOO this is such a fucking funny prompt - that being said, enjoy absolute crack and c!dream having enough!! please send me more asks like this because this is the funniest fucking thing KJEFKJNL i love writing crack i miss doing it so much

tag for this au is > l’houseberg au !!

warnings: fire, violence, fighting, alcohol + smoke mentions, pure crack LMAO

“Hey man,” his neighbour says conversationally, “so how’s things?”

Dream doesn’t even wince at the sound of screaming coming from his house. He’s used to it by now. “Oh, hi Techno, uh, you know-” He ducks under a flaming book thrown at the back of his head by a yelling Tommy, watching it land in his lawn and start burning freely. “Uh, things are a little quiet recently-”

“Quiet?” Techno’s eyebrows fly into his hairline. “You’re callin’ this quiet?”

“Um, well, things are better than they were last week,” Dream says optimistically, “so, um, the attic has been taken over by some guy I let into my house because he said he was homeless and had two kids with him, but you know, I’ve decided that’s fine. A few other people have showed up, for some reason, I don’t really know who they are, but-”

“Is- Is that the guy that stole your attic?” Techno points to Wilbur, who saunters by with a peanut butter sandwich from the kitchen while two others scream at him. “Wilbur Soot?”

Dream blinks. “You know him?”

“Yeah?” Techno scoffs. “Dude, he’s not even homeless. He lives with Phil. You know, like, the guy who lives next door to me?”

“He’s not homeless..?”

“You’ve been exiled!” A man in a beanie yells at Wilbur. “That means you can’t come into the attic again! Stop trying to break back in!”

“Let me talk to Schlatt,” Wilbur demands, “he’s been keeping the peanut butter from my people. I want to talk to him. He needs to treat my people better.”

“He’s passed out drunk in the attic, dude, I don’t know what you want from me-”

“Dream.” Techno interrupts their listening with some concern. “I hate to pry, but when was the last time you slept?”

“Oh, you know,” Dream laughs, voice cracking, eye twitching at the sound of something being smashed from the inside, “uh, like, a week or so ago!”

So that explains why he’s so calm. Techno winces, and then eyes the blanket and pillow in his hands. “I didn’t wake you as you were tryin’ to sleep, did I?”

“No, no,” Dream claps him on the back as he heads outside to a deckchair in the front yard, putting the pillow down and putting on sunglasses, deliberately ignoring the dismal weather and the fact his window cracks very suddenly behind him as someone is flung into a wall, “I decided to take a break for a bit. It’s like... vacation, you know?”

“Have you considered therapy?” Techno asks politely, as the sound of screaming gets louder. “This is pretty rough luck, man.”

“It’s okay,” Dream says absently, pulling the blanket over himself, already half asleep, “wake me up if they burn down my house, please.”

“TECHNOBLADE!”

Techno finds himself being yanked inside, and by the time he gets his bearings, the door is firmly shut and locked behind him. Heart sinking, he turns round to see a hyperactive TommyInnit and a very tired looking Wilbur Soot, one of them beaming, the other scowling.

“Hey,” Techno greets warily, “what’s goin’ on?”

“We’re taking back L’Attic,” Tommy says dramatically, throwing his arms out and shattering a photo of Dream and his friends that had been on the wall, “and you’re going to help.”

Technoblade glances upwards, where he can smell the faint stench of alcohol and smoke. “You mean Dream’s attic?”

“Revolution,” Wilbur stresses, crossing his arms, “we’re rebelling against the government, Technoblade. Are you in?”

...Techno turns to the door, still very firmly locked, and then to Quackity and Tubbo, who are yelling at each other over Dream’s bills.

“Yeah,” he sighs, resigning himself to his fate, “yeah, I’m in.”

if tumblr dies im going to replace it with an expansive discord server where you get your own channel and your mutuals can go in there and see what you post and then put it in their own channels. this of course will give us all the feeling of being trapped inside a small box with thousands of strangers we hate. the discourse will be fucking lethal.

I hope Dream is continuing his wheeze laughter with his close friends on discord, I hope he has a lot of cuddle sessions with Patches, I hope him and Sapnap are continuing their journey of making homemade foods/sauces, I hope he is having fun going through P.O. Box while wearing what his fans sent him, I hope he is reading letters filled by fans young and older thanking him for making them happy, I hope he is continuing plans to be ready for when he face reveals, I hope he is finding joy in setting up George’s gift basket for when he comes home, I hope Dream knows he is loved, validated, and deserves so much happiness <3

whats your type?

Fictional men written by women.

Yes, Spain!!!!

[Image descriptions: 1. Tweet by AJ+ @AJPlus [gold check verified] that says: Spain became the 1st country in Europe to offer paid menstrual leave, for 3-5 days. It also gave final approval to laws that: [bullet point] enshrine rights to abortion for people over 16 [bullet point] let trans people over 16 self-identify gender by simple declaration, one of the only places to do so [Attached to the Tweet is a photo of a group of people with trans flags gathered on the steps of a building with large stone columns.]

2. A headline from DW that says: “Spain passes laws on trans rights, abortion, menstrual leave – DW.” The visible part of the article says, “The new laws expand transgender rights and abortion access, as well as give workers paid menstrual leave. The approval comes ahead of…” \End descriptions]

i love paintings that look as if they have ghosts in them

Remus’ friendship with Sirius and James is actually hilarious. Lyall probably went ‘be careful son it’s important’ and Remus is like yeah alright like a good little werewolf and then a week later he sends a letter that’s like ‘my bestfriends, James Potter and Sirius Black-‘ like his parents must have had an aneurism