Every Time I See A "Sephiroth Uses A Whole Bottle Of Conditioner" HC I'm Like NNOOOOOO. Shampoo? Maybe.

you professed to offer greenflower but secretly you severed the bloom of its roots and placed the stalk in barren soil

you monster

I am very glad to be included in the list of people insane abt your aus. Anyways, tell me something about your graveyard shift au. It seems vast and I’ve been a little nervous to go figure out what the deal is, but everything you’ve been saying makes me very curious. How did Lloyd meet(?) ghosts. Does Red ever get mad at QuietOne over shapeshifting? How are the three of them friends AND enemies (delicious, but. how)? What’s Harumi’s whole… deal?

Also— would you like me to make some sort of sign off so you know it’s the flirty anon even when I’m not being particularly flirtatious?

Oh wow yeah so TGS is VERY complicated but I will answer to the absolute best of my ability. Yap session incoming:

How did Lloyd meet(?) ghosts? < so, this is pretty early. Lloyd is something called the Conduit (original I know) which means he's a liminal person with unfettered access to the Veil's energy - basically, he's the death avatar. he doesn't know this, though, because Misako's been keeping it secret by having him wear a vengestone/deepstone ring (i haven't decided which kind of stone to use yet) that suppresses this stuff. he also lives in a very not-liminal area. however, after getting moved to Jamanakai, he's surrounded by liminal energy. Harumi, who rlly wants him using his powers, gets him to take a job at the local graveyard. a few weeks in, he's shot while going home late at night. when he wakes up, he discovers he can suddenly see ghosts. He meets the Ninja ghosts bc he decides to go back to the graveyard to 'confront' his trauma after being shot, only to find five different ghosts Very Excited to bother him haha

Does Red ever get mad at Quiet One over shapeshifting? < hmm idrk? I haven't thought ab this one too much haha. she definitely hates Harumi post-reveal, and hates Quiet One on principle, but I don't think she has much beef with the actual shapeshifting so much as the steps taken to get there (aka murder and cannibalism sorry Harumi babe). Honestly, she's more pissed off about being lied to and manipulated than anything post-reveal, and pre-reveal she just doesn't want the fucking world to end. Also, Q is annoying. that's. that's the whole thing of their relationship pre-reveal, Q play-flirts with Red and Red finds her annoying lmao

How are the three of them friends AND enemies (delicious, but. how)? < fantastic question! so, this au was completely upended from being just Lloyd and Harumi centric with a side of Akita to full on Lloyd, Akita, and Harumi because of the anime SpyxFamily I'm not even joking. So, basically: in 'civilian' form, they all attend the same school. Lloyd meets both of them his first day, and gets super attached immediately bc they're actually Nice to him (he doesn't have friends what a loser /j). He doesn't know either's true identity. Akita gets attached to Lloyd as well bc she's been isolated for a while, and for a hot minute she and Harumi are Friend-In-Laws. Harumi is purposefully manipulating Lloyd, but eventually her love for both of them becomes real. Once ghosts start Doing Shit around town, Lloyd starts Vigilante-ing to protect Harumia and Akita, following a school-wide possession. The Quiet One is trying to kidnap him for his powers, and is the one summoning said ghosts. Red is trying to kill them both - Harumi, bc she's actively trying to end the world, and Lloyd simply bc he has the potential to (an 'eliminate the threat' situation) - to protect Harumi and Lloyd. So: Harumi knows Conduit is Lloyd, doesn't know Red is Akita. Akita doesn't know either identity. Lloyd also doesn't know either identity. It's like Miraculous but with murder and body horror

What’s Harumi’s whole… deal? < hoooo boy. so... hm. okay. Gonna do this rlly fast and simplistically so if you want some deeper info send me more asks. So: at 6, she contracts Veil Sickness (Veil-based disease that affects liminal ppl) and dies. Her parents find the Preeminent's cult and give up their own lives to resurrect her - this has not been replicated. This is the story she is told when she wakes up in a pool of blood. In reality, her and her parents were targeted as part of the cult's experiments with resurrection. She is told she is evil bc to bring her back, her parents' souls have been broken beyond repair, and cannot move on to the afterlife. They're trapped in eternal agony, tied to their decaying bodies. fun. Eventually, it comes to light that Harumi has developed the ability to shapeshift into anything she kills and eats the corpse of. She is manipulated into using her unique powerset to aid the Preeminent's escape from the Veil. She's manipulating Lloyd bc the Conduit is the only one who can power the Realm Crystal, which is the only thing that can bring the Preeminent through. She thinks the Preeminent will fix her parents if she does this. Obviously she won't, but. y'know. In the AU proper, Harumi is: Harumi the best friend, Quiet One, Jade the stray cat, Brad the eventual boyfriend (oof), and mysterious shooter. She's very very fun to me personally I love her so much and istg she gets a redemption arc. the entire fic is her redemption arc even if it doesn't look it I SWEAR

I love your asks sm anon and I would love a little sign off. Ty for having such beautiful deep asks for me <3

we have an emergency

THEY ESCAPED

ICE raids happening in Chicago on Tuesday January 21st. Get organized and get prepared.

coincidentally, same

Goodluck Pikachu

oop! fixed it sorry🫰🏽

WIIIIIIP

He looks pretty, doesn't he? he looks nice when he's not angry or worried or sad and stuff. well, he looks nice when he's like that too, but it's good that he's not like that all the time anymore. I always traumatise the shit out of him, but he always ends in happiness

I started using Head and Shoulders ten years ago for itchy scalp and dandruff, and then for ten years I have not had itchy scalp and dandruff, so I thought “why do I still buy shampoo to combat itchy scalp and dandruff when I do not have itchy scalp and dandruff,” so I stopped buying the shampoo for itchy scalp and dandruff and can you guess I have now? Can you predict what currently afflicts me? It’s alright if you can’t because apparently I fuckin couldn’t either

Have A Nice Day!

i couldn’t think of a better way to communicate this so its this . my struggle