The Signs As Weird Things I've Seen On Google

The signs as weird things I've seen on google

Aries: I think I just had a poop child. I legit think I lost 4 kilos.

Taurus: Are there people who are sexually attracted to Pokémon?

Gemini: I hate it when I'm studying and a velociraptor throws bananas at me.

Cancer: I just went outside and heard someone boo. Update: it was my wife.

Leo: NEVER PUT A SOCK IN A TOASTER.

Virgo: Can Jesus microwave a burrito?

Libra: What are these strawberries doing on my nipples I need them for my fruit salad.

Scorpio: I like to tape my thumbs together and pretend I'm a dinosaur- what did you expect? Some freaky bondage? Nah my mum doesn't approve of that soz.

Capricorn: What do I do if a ginger kid bites me?

Sagittarius: What would a chair look like if your knees were bend the other way?

Aquarius: Why can't I own a dwarf Chinese person?

Pisces: Sometimes when I'm alone I pretend I'm a carrot.

The Sign’s Handwriting (Mercury)

**Mercury rules communication, speech, and writing, so it also determines handwriting. You can also check your sun sign for this.

Aries: big letters, gets sloppier as they get farther along—although it may not have been neat to begin with. bares down hard, breaks pencil tips easily.

Taurus: rigid. classic. doesn’t venture far from the standard letter writing techniques. probably really good at cursive and calligraphy.

Gemini: constantly changing the way they write letters, switches back and forth between print and cursive. probably good at imitating other people’s handwriting. pointy letters.

Cancer: pretty handwriting. simple. easy to read. letters are spaced kind of far apart. most likely to dot their i’s with circles or hearts.

Leo: big, fanciful letters. has a unique, creative way of writing. they probably do some odd little thing that most people find strange. most obnoxious signature ever.

Virgo: small, neat, precise letters spaced kind of close together. writes in perfectly straight lines. letters don’t slant. judges people for their sloppy handwriting.

Libra: teenage girl handwriting where every letter is the same size and height. really neat and aesthetically pleasing to look at.

Scorpio: possibly sloppy handwriting. curly letters that aren’t always the same size. doesn’t stay inside the lines.

Sagittarius: writes quickly but neatly. doesn’t bare down very hard. writes just above the line and spreads their words out. probably developed really good shorthand for taking notes.

Capricorn: carefully and methodically writes every word. perfect print handwriting. perfect cursive. simple and clean. straight lines. no slants or curves. maybe a little bit boring, as far as handwriting goes.

Aquarius: 75 percent neat. 25 percent sloppy. gets worse as they lose motivation. words may be spread out. Starts writing certain letters differently because they feel like it. has pretty handwriting but always says they don’t.

Pisces: words slant either to the right or left. words are kind of spaced out. doesn’t bare down very hard. handwriting has a dreamy sort of quality. rounded letters. the type to write in half cursive, half print.

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charlyce28

7 years ago

THE SIGNS AS EGYPTIAN GODS

Aries: Apophis; God of war and chaos, and snakes.

Taurus: Geb; God of the earth and fertility.

Gemini: Seshat; Goddess of writing, measurement, and mathematics.

Cancer: Nut; Goddess of the moon, skies, and stars.

Leo: Bastet; God of cats, protector of children and pregnant women.

Virgo: Tefnut; Goddess depicted as lion, ruled over water and fertility.

Libra: Isis; Goddess of magic, protection, healing, and love.

Scorpio: Anubis; God of the dead, funerals, and mourning.

Sagittarius: Thoth; God of scribes, wisdom, and knowledge.

Capricorn: Osiris; God of the underworld and afterlife.

Aquarius: Horus; God of the sky, battle, and falcons.

Pisces: Kebechet; Goddess of purification. Depicted as wandering goddess or lost child.

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charlyce28

8 years ago

The Signs Expecting A New Baby

Aries: *rubs hands manically* “Yesss, a new devil spawn had been born >:)”

Taurus: *is genuinely excited* Gemini: “oh yay!^_^ I’m gonna take it scuba diving”

Cancer: *hates it at first and then loves it 5 minutes later*

Leo: “No I WAS THE ONLY CHILD!……..You little bitch”

Virgo: *teaching it to talk at 7 weeks old* “Fucking say it: Iridocyclitis”

Libra: “Awe, I’m gonna share all my clothes and all that other shit with it!”

Scorpio: “GREAT, another asshole in the family”

Sagittarius: “God DAMMIY DAD WRAP IT UP”

Capricorn: “Here’s the deal: I’ll love it until it begins to talk. After that, DITCH IT”

Aquarius: “ugh ok”

Pisces: *is the new baby; fuckin adorable*

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charlyce28

9 years ago

earthling v alien

earthling: libra, leo, aries, capricorn, cancer, scorpio, gemini

alien: aquarius, pisces, sagittarius, taurus, virgo

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charlyce28

7 years ago

Sciences that best match the signs

Aries: Chemistry

Taurus: Geology/Geography

Gemini: Psychology

Cancer: Philosophy

Leo: Biology

Virgo: Economics/mathematics

Libra: Sociology

Scorpio: Astronomy

Sagittarius: Archeology

Capricorn: Chronology/History

Aquarius: Physics

Pisces: Oceanology

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charlyce28

8 years ago

How The Signs React To A Zombie Apocalypse

Aquarius will be totally unemotional and as the trendsetter for the future, their job is to eliminate as many “walkers” as they can. Aquarians tend to be rebels just for the sake of having their own way so don’t try to stop them…they will do it their way even if others have proved it wrong. Pisces will try to befriend the zombies and understand their past. They will be the ones looking for medical supplies with Shane and will help to heal anyone regardless of whether they are a zombie or human. Aries will be like the character Rick as they love to lead. They’ll be the ones to take a gamble and their desire for the “thrill of the hunt”, will drag others into the woods where their survival will be up to each person’s instincts. Taurus will follow the leader and will not be happy on their adventure into the “unknown”, however they have an immense sense of perseverance and even when other give up, the Taurus will rage on. Gemini will know who has been infected with the walker virus and will be more than happy to share that with everyone but they need to be careful because dangerous secrets will cause a lot of tension and their lives will immediately be in danger. Cancer will be the first ones to help convert the prison into their new home. They have a strong survival instinct and can become very manipulative if necessary. Zombies beware! Leo will be compared to the Governor who proudly shows off the heads of soldiers in aquarium tanks as his trophies. Ask him who’s who and he’ll puff out his chest and give you the 411, one head at a time. Virgo will have been working on a cure for the infection and ensuring that the protocols for safety are in place. Their analytical minds will allow them to be rational and if the end is near, they will make every attempt to send you in the right direction. Their goal is to keep the world in order. Libra will make every attempt to get the zombies to like them and if that doesn’t work, they’ll try something else because they don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or make the wrong decision. This will definitely be to their detriment and ultimately their demise. Scorpio will be turned on by the sex appeal of the “walkers”… the living dead can make the pulse beat faster and the scorpion is all about dominance so the quest to conquer will drive them to succeed. A “biter” will be their main conquest and they will battle it out to see who will win…and we all know how much a scorpion hates to lose. Sagittarius will be the ones the humans believe because they are void of emotion and believe that something good is just around the corner. The Sags luck and positive outlook just might lead others to a safe place.

Capricorn will plot out the escape of the humans as they rarely trust anyone else to finish the job. They will do everything they can to bond the group together and will lead them to the town of Woodbury, where they think everyone is safe

Source: Unknown

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charlyce28

7 years ago