School Has Just Started But No One Can Stop Me From Going Back To The Sea. ✨🌊

nothing will remind you that eating is good and okay like fantasy books will. “and that night in the valley they brought out the best plum cake and sweet cream, trout and turnips roasted over the fire, mead and goatsmilk and fresh cold water from the spring-“ and it’s like yeah dude you’re absolutely right. then sometimes it’s like “as he slept that night in the woods, he sorely missed the valley, where they brought out the best plum cake-“ and it’s like man that sucks i’ll have some seconds in his honor

五月 ｰ 七月 (June to July): ☁This journal is inspired by Reese’s aesthetic and Pixie’s iridescent life. 💕 ☁ Ate spicy sunflower seeds and it was good. ☁ Nasal allergies. ☁ “Fusion-y” tea. ✨ ☁ Secret autograph of Reese I will forever keep. ☁ Just saying I’ve learn a lot from Ate Kaila. 💕🌈

My problem with notebooks and journals is that I’m not worthy enough to use them because I might ruin there beauty. Another reason why I take days to finish a page > < But I love them still.

Getting offline-life together for the first quarter of the year hoping *really crossing my fingers* to have more than two months of cleaning my current messy state all-wise, really. Hello again, it has been a while my smol cave 🏠

(But I had the slightest time to pull off this little painting of a cactus from the porch while waiting at the laundry shop ☕)

Life lately 😐

⛅ First thing's first, is that I HAVEN'T EATEN ANY OF THIS YEAR'S AVOCADOES 😞

I get my avocadoes from friends and relatives who are lucky enough to have their own avocado trees and it always gets crazy when it's in season. Somehow this year, the trees are late and I felt a missing piece of summer when I didn't celebrated it with my avocadoes. Huhuhu

⛅ I wasn't feeling really good last April when it comes to doing the things I love, I had no motivation and was super out of it and I didn't know why. Back then, my thoughts concluded and blamed some retrograde (lol) and didn't arrive any "final" decision because I always keep changing my mind (which sucked tbh). So I wanted to escaped my out of that through reading volumes and I mean VOLUMES of comics, manga, webtoons, watched youtube videos of every kind until around the first days of May, I found Mateusz Urbanowicz's channel full of the kind of art I love & I want to renshuu(!!). It was also around this time that I felt like I was back on my feet again (but back to square one since I was out of it for the past months even school had ended). Clara Benin's new song also came out in a demo posted on her channel and THIS, THIS was indeed an eye opening thing when I heard it for the first time, always struck by her words. Wrestle helped me so much during that strange time.😌

⛅ So I came back and had my ooh moments together with me and I was straight on with planning personal projects. I started off with a scenery practice with a twitter photoset of Ghibli scenery (WHICH I STILL HAVEN'T FINISHED YET BECAUSE HUHU 💔 I WANNA FINISH IT!). I felt like I was in the zone (lol) and I was soo into it but it got cut off right away because a summer job called in that was supposed to be already there last April but they started late in the middle of May so I suddenly got my hands full 😐 Ended the summer with a tiring job that unexpectedly and barely paid smh (not going back there ever) 💔 The zone is gone but even now I still want to finish what I've started aaa timing sucks hmp.

⛅ SENIOR YEAR!! School started and I kinda miss my previous class since they were all kind of approachable and easy to talk to compared to this year. I observed that I don't talk much to this class but we'll see as time flies since it's still the first three weeks of school so 🌞 I also observed that I suddenly have more time in between periods and that maybe I could be more productive instead of sleeping & staring at the open space haha 🙆

Let's just see how everything goes

Looking forward to Shinkai’s newest film!! 

Some stills from “Your Name” Director Makoto Shinkai’s new film “Weathering With You” (天気の子 Tenki no Ko, “Child of Weather”) in Japanese cinemas 19th July 2019.

君の名は (Kimi no Na Wa)

Bounded by a timeless feeling, I found myself lying on my pillows in awe after watching the newest Shinkai masterpiece on a cold and rainy night. It has really been a while since I’ve felt like this after something that is so worthy to watch.

My hands are always up for Makoto Shinkai’s art and story. He has his way of portraying the little details of life that suddenly reflects a bigger impact of a scene later on. (I’m talking about the rate of which the cherry blossoms fall, the morning downpours of a busy city, kumihimo, and tankas)

Also, RADWIMPS’s lyrics was so beautiful. His music resonates and completes the whole story and I find that very fulfilling. Kimi No Na Wa *kinda* reminded me a little of myself.

I’ll wait for the HD of the HD of the movie and watch it again for the greater good. I know that it will be a thousand times better and an emotional wreck haha.

Hopes & dreams,

- 花

I FINALLY MADE IT TO A ONE OK ROCK CONCERT 😭✨

 Who knew I’d go and finally witness their music years after I found them on youtube playing most of their live concerts rather than their studio recordings.

2017 was made up of panic attacks, breakdowns, severe acne, real decisions, tears, a broken heart, self-care attempts (that really helped huhu) and failures. It sucks to start the year with crushed hopes and dreams that ended me but I also wanted to feel hope again, because I know that I have the will to also do the things I love. So I started again 🌞

Because I knew I was going to be stuck for a while, I promised to myself to do the things I love just as much as I'll work hard in the current decision I've taken. And along that path, I found out that I could possibly go to an Ambitions Asia Tour. I was also shookt myself lol

I extremely saved money since they announced their event, raged my dreamz of listening them live to my journal, dog, family, and friends (and believed that she can't just like others who wanted to see concerts hmp), constantly and desperately checking promo flights from every airline, asked help to extended relatives in the city if they wanted to have me infiltrate their home for a while, etc. Everything was never under my hands and this show was a game stopper for the past months of 2017. Four remaining months of saving, singing their songs (new and old alike), praying, and more praying that everything would fall into place, 2017 ended just like that. To me, the year felt quick and I was happy for its pace.

bonus: sight seeing at Taal Lake, Tagaytay in 21°c weather, yellow suitcase for Ambitions MNL 💛

(As if I'm in Osaka in their early days huhu), the atmosphere first felt like I was one of the audience of the Yokohama concert way back 2014 (oh youtube)

Mighty Long Fall

My friend who came with me said I should've scream like others in a concert and not just sing with the whole arena. Nah man, I prefer to sit down and listen to them doing what they love, sing with the people, jump or raise our freakin hands up rather than adding noise whenever. (I did scream and gave them a big applause when they talked and all did solos huhu esp taka during clock strikes and toru and his guitar solos 💓)

MY FIRST BAND SHIRT 😭

Not only I was looking forward to see the four playing, I was also very very happy of witnessing the whole crew of ONE OK ROCK, the lighting technicians (kudos 🙌), videocam crew for an amazing job (I felt like I was watching their youtube videos but live & irl 😂), security, organizers, and esp their official photographer @julenphoto , the same guy who shoots for their instagram photos huhu 💓

ONE OK ROCK welcomed my new year with hope and that I still could do something with these little hands of mine, slowly but surely. So as long as you keep your own pace and that you don't mind everyone else's journey, you have your own and in your own speed, you can have what it takes to be who you are and finish what you've started with courage, good attitude, and ofc love. 💖

Anything they say will never break our hearts of gold.

Hopes and dreams forevermore,

-花。

An indian almond tree (or talisay as we’d like to call it) near our classroom just had its annual shedding from red to the color of the year and it’s so refreshing to see this after the last weeks of school. ✨

Can’t wait for vacation.

Finally Had The Guts To Start A Proper Bullet Journal 📖🎉👀 | Some Thoughts

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Around the last days of August, I finally had the resolve of bullet journaling my way out of a busy month of school work, exams, college admission tests, a youth service that I'd never think of participating, and esp (of course, once again) an inktober attempt juggling all these things in a span of thirty one days. Spoiler: I got by and actually (barely) survived ✨🎉

I'd say it is a proper bullet journal now because of such elements based from Ryder Cowell's system of the whole bujo. I never really dug deep into the bujo community until I realized that bullet journaling was waaay more flexible than I thought. So I researched the whole concept and it turns out I was actually "bullet journaling" even way back since I used to do (food and skincare) logs, (anime & manga) trackers and (idea/music) lists before then, only the difference is that it was all over the place, kept in an unorganized manner unlike a proper bujo separating them by months for convenience of the viewer's eye onto the paper he/she's seeing.

I realized I was about to go down if I didn't kept track of the things that was happening last month. I decided to put my inktober works inside my bujo along with my test permits and weekly tasks in school. You could say that this notebook helps me stabilize equal amounts of time with school related tasks and my creative projects I've been working on since idk... day 1? *sighs. (To be honest, my heart is aching to be in two places at once -_-) It's been a long time for me doing multiple things, and I miss concentrating, focusing on one thing with all your heart. That's why I decided getting things real with legit planning my days from now on. I still think its scary doing this since I'm more of a "surprise attack" person than an organized one at that.

I think I did a pretty good job on my first month. We're now in the early days of November and I think I'm making sure I'll get things by. Bullet journaling is kind of therapeutic tbh, been tracking my sleep lately bc of my weird patterns but I'm sure I'll be fine soon haha 😃

Hopes and dreams,

-花 🌸

Ps: stickers and things aren't really necessary, they just make me happy by seeing colors every now and then hehe

Pps: not posting it that much online = also don't wanna stress over how it looks and not that visually pleasing since it isn’t about that at all heheh

☔ Green dewy grass and air getting cold horaaay but man June passed so quickly. Oh and I finally got a new journal last month after two years.

I know its like the first of July but I’m in the middle of all reality and stress with a pile of schoolwork to do huhu but I know all will be well. Keep reminding myself about the small things I see in town like the weird pink tricycle whose horn sounds like a rooster, a dog that looks like a hairless pig, the different kinds of birds living in the backyard, the homeless woman cooking breakfast early in the morning, the electric post that still grows branches and leaves on top of itself, or the cool skater dude with locks that passes by at school. 

Yeah, we are definitely gonna be fine