~Error~

June 24th, 2022 8:10 AM

Timeless Place

This day I woke to some not so great news. The news anyone doesn’t want to hear when it comes to a love one. A call from a grieving parent about a mother (grandmother) who passed away. It was something I didn’t expect to hear nor think to happen. I thought there was going to be more time for you. Time.

Timing is everything isn’t it? Time ticks and it tocks. Time runs 24/7. Day and night. 7 days a week, to a month, to a year. I realize in this realm where in, time will end. There’s a timing for everything and a stopping point. We are all assigned a clock for ourselves. So use time wisely. Before the moment comes where it’ll not run anymore. But there is a place where it will forever run. There is no end. There is  eternity. There is life. From way above. I think the biggest accomplishment to ever reached is being with the creator. THE creator of the universe. Wow. Leaving this world and going to a never ending realm. Known as Heaven. And so then, you reached the final stage. Nothing after that. A timeless place.

Planet Jupiter 9/26/22 8:08 pm.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJGmVg7E/

5:55 am

July 4th, 2021 10:05 p.m

On this day you chose to do something that broke my trust with you.

It ended too soon.

I am broken

I’m aching

I am feeling pain

Now I just want to be numb...

February 8, 2021

~Loneliness~

Last night had to of been another horrifying thing I went through and experience. Dealing with someone who has deep dark depression and energy is draining. It can effect you. It hurt my spirit to have gone through someone who were using inhuman activity and words towards me. What have I done? I’ve done nothing but to try to be an example of a better person and someone who is healing. My spiritual warfare I’ve been dealing with has not been easy. It’s been to break me down. Only thing I’m still standing is because of God. As much as I want to surrender. At the same time I can’t. I know things in life won’t get easier. But it’s never right to put the blame on others. Own up to your own mistakes and lessons and learn from them. She never wanted to. But uses me as a punching bag to put anger on me. As if I don’t feel alone in this world. I am lonely. I’ve been feeling like this for years. But I know spiritually I’m not alone because I have Jesus by my side. But oh my how my physical self feels like it’s just shattered in pieces. Toxic people who have no hope or faith will be the ones to way you down. But why is it a parent of mine. So many skeletons in my closet I’ve been hiding for years and why add more on to them? I don’t have any friends. No one. It’s just me. I just want to be with the Lord. I can’t handle the emptiness that’s in my chest. Save me! I say to God. Why am I always alone. Then a voice in my head tells me. “You’re not alone I’ve always been with you by side.” Just notice me.

Simply why I don’t speak on a person too soon, because I know in the end their colors will truly show.

Sunset sherbert 🧡💛💜

When you left me.. you replaced me in an instant like I was a no one.

You left when someone close to me had passed away.

I was left not only grieving a death of a loved one, but now a death of a relationship.

You looked me in the eyes and said I’m just like everyone else.

It seemed all along I fought for our relationship but you didn’t do the same.

You were always on my mind but I wasn’t on yours.

And even now…. You still are.

I need to get you out my head.