Latest Posts by coffeefiction - Page 2

ending the year with some blurr swerve doodles to feed my everlasting brainrot (I’m not normal about them)

In the mecha au

I feel like Swerve will have to be this weird middleman, since he has knowledge of both cybertronian and human cultures (and sees himself as both human and cybertronian). That will lead to him having to mediate between the cybertronians and humans to help them understand each other better, since it's easy to see they are all moving toward a relationship, and understanding each other is important.

So with the cybertronians he's gonna have this conversation where he basically explain to them that the humans are very fragile and can't really survive outside of their planet without help (this is mostly for deadlock), and that humans live very short life, which means as much as they love them they would have to be aware of the fact that their time together will be short, and that would mean that they would have to bare the pain of loosing them. And they have to fully consider this fact before getting in any kind of relationship

Even though he himself, probably, haven't really grasped that fact, or knowledged it completely.

And then he has the conversation with the humans where he explains about mechanical lifeforms and their differences from organic lifeforms, and the fact that they technically don't really have gender or anything to tell them apart in that aspect (which is super important for their race) , or the most important fact that they are an acesexual species that reproduced completely differently and value close relationships and bonds... Which at the end will basically boil down to "I'm not saying you were planning to, but just in case, you can't fuck the giant alien robots, I'm sorry. "

Oh he absolutely would have these awkward little q&a sessions with everyone ahahah

Explaining humans to Cybertronians. And reverse.

He would also probably be the one to spill the lil fun secret about Cybertronians being able to read human EM fields. Deadlock would try to kill him for that~

Also kfsksikf

Swerve: Basically. You can't fuck a giant robot.

First Aid: A brave man looks for ways, a coward looks for excuses.

Everyone in the room:

Here's more incorrect qoutes for @keferon mecha Au to fuel everyone's angsty soul.

First Aid: Can you come out?

Blurr: Yeah sure, give me a sec..

Blurr: First Aid, I'm gay

First: *visible twitching* I already know that, come out to the car

Blurr: oh..ok

Blurr: Swerve I'm gay

Swerve who is currently on his alt mode: We are literally dating!

________________

Prowl; You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you all even get here so fast?

Jazz: Several traffic lights

Swerve: Three counts of resisting arrest, one for each of us

Blurr: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks

Jazz: and that is not our car.

Deadlock who is the car: Hey Prowl

Prowl: what the frag?!

__________________

Rodimus: Isn't it weird that people kill mosquitoes just because they're annoying?

First Aid: Damn, if people did that to each other, Vortex would've killed everyone years ago.

__________________

Someone holding a gun to First Aid's head; what happens if I pull this trigger? Heaven?

First Aid: Bold of you to assume I'll go to heaven.

_________________

Jazz: you know, Prowl, when you generalize, you tell general...lies.

Prowl: ......

Prowl: Are you trying to teach me moral lesson through puns?

________________

Swerve to Blurr: Would you like to stay for dinner?

Jazz from the kitchen: would you like to stay forever!?!

_________________

Jazz: Wow, this parking is as straight as I am

Swerve first time driving an actual car: I know I should be more focus on the fact you just came out, but HOW FUCKING DARE YOU INSULT MY PARKING

_________________

Swerve: *Sneaking around the facility trying to get to Blurr*

First Aid from the distance who's high on the shit Pharma gaved him: *Watching Swerve phase through a wall* There goes my monthly does of Swerve

_______________

Prowl: Are you crying?

Jazz, try to cut onions: No, it's just the onion, they-

Prowl grabbing the Onion with force: What the frag did you say to Jazz?

I took a break from catching up all the plots wheeeeeeezeeee

yoooOooo!!! That's one killer of an art right there!!!

Pretty please let them kill Pharma it would be soooooo funny

Just a short animation. Megatron broods over the past aboard the Lost Light.

This is one way to be greeted by the new year-

"I'm tired"

*runs away at the speed of light*

Prime apprentice AU! (primeprentice? idk)

Basically the Thirteen are still alive and they take in apprentices to train for potential Primacy.

Prima Prime → Orion Pax

Megatronous Prime → D-16

aHhh okay so the discussions of Titan!Megatron on @callsign-relic's blog have fully. FULLY taken over my brain and ive been drawing stuff for it for like the last few days nonstop

the tl;dr of this is AU is pretty much "what if Megatron got turned into a titan/cityformer as a form of penance/imprisonment and now roams the empty wasteland of Cybertron forever" plus "IDW Megatron has really fucked up internals so... what if that, but as a City?"

and of course since he's a Titan, that also means he has a cityspeaker... or three. One per sub-AU thing. Theres 3 options. 3 flavours of AU.

i have so much art to make. but in the meantime, for more info! check out the #titan au tag on Relic's blog :]!! (also uhh potential ns//fw warning for the link shfjbdkd)

Hi. My battery is running out once again so design and art notes get chucked here instead of an image.

The cuffs and collar are hardwired into Megatron, so I made the lights the same colour as his biolights!

I imagine that on the tops of his shoulders there are solar panels, even if you can't see them here lol.

I really wanted to keep the swirly bits on Megatron's chest from IDW

Other art notes:

The second picture with the seekers is (loosely) inspired by a discussion about whether or not Megatron gets visitors or not. I thought about who would visit him and well... I think this is as close as Starscream realistically gets to visiting him.

Extra detail about that piece is that Thundercracker and Skywarp are keeping watch from above! Also drawing Megatron took me like 8 hours because I was struggling with his legs really badly kshffkbfkdsbdk,, the background went much faster, funnily enough.

Optimus specifically isn't wearing his Autobot badge any more.

This isn't relevant in this series of images, but Ultra Magnus's eye markings are only on the Magnus armour. His other two forms do not have them :] (... until he begins to discard the armour, that is.)

Megatron is roughly 3200m/2 miles tall. Technically he could have clouds around his knees, but I thought this looked a little bit cooler lol.

Also, height chart! Him big. I didn't even attempt to put a human for scale because that'd be. near impossible with this scale.

Phew, my last weeks of work are now complete >:)

I loved Dratchet and Ratchlock since the very beginning of my attachment towards Transformers, first TFP Ratchet…..but yeah….two of my favorites character….plus Keferon’s Mech AU…..I had to make my own thing about it.

A story….no…an illustration ! I couldn’t choose. So I did both :}

—————————————————

That was not the first time Ratchet came back to his private lab angry, but this time, yelling at his superiors, and at the system, and basically at evverything that could be yelled at except the pilotd while leaving the manufacture, was certainly the last. He quit. That was enough,

you don’t win a war with feelings they said

well yes,

exactly,

but you win a war with soldier, and frying their mind before they have their first fight because you want them to be more perfectionned ? That was a little counter productive.

So he gave up. They are on their own now.

The lightly humming of his car was barely enough to keep him awake, it have been a long time since he last returned home, usually, he stayed at his work place, to have more time to sleep, but then, he was sleeping even less. An endless vicious circle, things were often like that.

But all of that was over for him.

He granted these young greenhorn with his experience, and what did they do ? Ignored his advices. Sending pilots to death. So now, he had himself out of the infernal machinery. This mindless waste of human life, even where this is what they tried to save was absurd.

In the middle of his quiet and late ride, he heard a noise. Rumbling, was it the engine ? As he stopped the car backroad to check, the noise wasnt stopping. Came from the sky, military patrol ? He raised his two tired eyes on the sky and saw a shining rail approaching his forest, falling fast. Not quintesson shaped, and with the gaze of an experimented biomechanist, Ratchet identified a mech.

At this moment, its violently crashed on the ground, behind the trees at maybe three or four miles away. No matter how hard he argued with the scientist sooner this day or how bad he wanted to say fuck to all of this death industry who killed young soldiers, he could do something for the one trapped inside the mech....maybe.... the man regained his car as fast as possible and urgently headed for the crash area.

Deafened sound of tires on the damaged road. Ratchet was already projecting, mentally stocktaking the tools he took with him, and lucky enough for the poor pilot, he quit with almost all of his material, and even if it was mainly mechs repairing material, he also bought some instruments which were used for the subtle neuromedicine between human and mech. Could adapt some of it and stabilize the pilot....then he may have the time to go home and grab proper materials. If there was life there was hope.

" bold of him to crash himself just the day i insulted all of his hierachy".

He frowned. Almost there.

The trees nearby were crushed and uprooted. A flickering pink light catched his gaze.

Almost immediately, the Ratchet analyzed the mech. It was different. He didnt know in wich country it was made but that almost looks alien. The curves and shapes, busted and burned on several places were demonstrating an incredible display of genius ingeniery he could just admiring. But time was not for being amazed on plating.

Someone was trapped there.

He stopped and parked his car in front of a fallen tree, rushing to the car's trunk, taking few indispensable objets, including some of them to help a safe disconnection between pilot/mech. In case he wasnt out already. And a crowbar, the cockpit might be stuck, seeing all the damages the mech has taken...

The sound of slightly wet grass under his feet was covered by a frenetic noise of aeration. Ratchet listened to it, while cautiously approaching the unknown mech. It almost sounded like a breath, but was certainly a depressurisation issue. The mech had fallen from so high on the sky....

The damaged plating were hot, probably from atmosphere friction. He raised his crowbar and his eyes followed the curves of the chestplates, searching for a familiar shape, that could lead him to the injured pilot inside. His gaze stopped on a deep wound, that might have cut through the cockpit.

The engineer stepped on the hot metal, his thick boots preventing him from feeling the heat, and he started searching for a hint....anything that could be a mechanism, anything that could open this damn mech !

Ratchet considered the damaged chest plate he noticed earlier. The surroundings of the wound were leaking bright pink, a very unusual color for fuel. Another of these definitively strange things about the mech. Again....not the time for that. Maybe if he could widen the gap, then he would be able to have an idea of what was going on under this armor.

He tapped the plate, -it was starting to cool down- with one of his finger. It was a very little tap, but the whole mech startled. A hiss of pain, recognisible easily by an emerite engineer-but-i-fix-people-too, it had come from the head of the mecha. Was this modele controlled from the head, like Vortex ? But Vortex was insanely huge for a mech, way taller than this one. He moved careful, noticing the shaking of his support.

"You hear me, kid ? Its going to be ok. You crashed in a safe area.".

He spoke in his medic tone, wich mean, of course brusque, serious, but also reassuring and calm.

He mumbled about the mech's features and tiny words of comfort while reaching for the head.

A red light, not regular and rather epileptic was coming from the head, and while he was almost there, on all four of his limb to keep balance, Ratchet saw it.

A spectacularly humanoid face, with sculpted nose and lips was tensed in a painful expression, frowning, but the thing who trapped his gaze was the two optics....

....staring back at him.

Mechs dont stare. Their eyes are glowing, oftenly to mimick human face, after all, human are pretty prideful creature, no point in piloting big ass metal titan if no one could tell these where their creation.

What human couldnt mimick with technologie, on the other hand, was the subtle expression between trying to evualuate a threat, his own injuries, and looking rather on the verge of death but also ready to tear any enemy's limb appart with its teeth.

With just one....very long....look at the other's eye, Ratchet was suddenly understanding what was going on.

Well....probably not but he knew what he had to save.

The pilot, the pilot he had to save.

The mech was the pilot.

He was the one he had to save.

He stopped trying to -certainly- open his chest. If it wasnt good for human it probably wasnt for living technology.

The giant technological humanoid seemed in a high distress, exhaling a lot of air from his vents, his eye still intensely staring at him and the engineer doubted his usual technique -including trying to make himself as small as possible- would work.

"Its going to be okay Kid. I can help you. There is nothing here that want to harm you".

He did his best to convey all of these emotions with his facial expression and gaze, still firmly watching back at him.

"the world better wait till im home and officially retired before killing me".

The mech's gaze -damn it was so more living than ANY human made machinery- seemed to soften a bit but still radiated with suspicion.

Deadlock had been in several bad situations. It happened quite a lot when a specie of giant aliens with tendrils tried to invade your homeland, and he was ready to it.

Trained to kill, and to do it efficiently.

And he was *good* at it.

This time was just another of these ‘i went too far in my excitation’ moments, and he has crashed on a random planet he hoped was not inhabited. He landed hard, and pieces of his ship must’ve been thrown near his location.

And now, now there was an organic like no one he ever saw, and the organic was on his *lap* and he had the kindest warmest eyes he ever saw.

And these eyes were directly looking at his own eyes, and the well named ‘Deadlock’ was starting to wonder if he finally had reunited with the Allspark. His pained and tenseful grin faded a little and he tried to move his head forward, searching a better point of view to watch the singularity in front of him.

Ow.

Moving hurt.

Some sound came out of the organic’s mouth, probably a language. He didn’t had the proper tools to decode it but the tone of the language was extremely….comforting ? Soft ?

This was scary.

He wasn’t used to be welcomed like that after a fight.

Usually it was either another fight, either the yelling of a superior, either nothing at all. But this actual living being was carefully examinating his chestplates, and he recognized the gestual of someone who was used to heal. A medic perhaps ?

He tried to move something, maybe a hand, to reach for the pale organic, to be sure he was real, but his body was rather uncooperative, from what he could say, one of his legs was missing, and a lot of wound were releasing energon on the ground he couldn’t saw.

The high probabilities of bleeding out and crash was an issue.

He let his head hang, too tired to watch for every moves of the organic, and barely aware of his environment.

There must be a big problem somewhere….

He confusely thought, while watching the stars.

Must be a bigger injury I haven’t saw……..

Ratchet saw the bright light coming from the alien’s eyes slowly fading, and cold swear ran through his back. Yet, he could still say the soldier was alive, the lights of his body were shining, not a lot, but it was enough. He looked at his first aid kit with disappointment. That wouldn’t be very efficient since the form of life he was trying to preserve wasn’t a tiny human. The nearest thing he could compare the Mech to was….well their own mechs, or eventually….Quintesson. An horrible mess of organic and technology. It was partially thanks to their weird constitution that Ratchet had been able to make sense with the ‘he is alive’ thought.

At this moment and with this material, he couldn’t help the kid, and didn’t possess enough knowledge to tell if he was even dying or not.

He had already an idea of what to do….to fix him, at least trying to, but it involved several objects he hadn’t right now. Leaving to search for these so called objects was risking to let an injured alone, he couldn’t take that risk. He was trapped with the mech, and had to hurry and find something. He stood and reached for more adapted material in his car, trying to find something…. Anything.

Surprisingly, the most useful artifact he came across was his electric screwdriver and a bunch of screw along with a long metallic cabke. A parallel between human stitch, with sewing threads and the material he had with him right now. He could manage something between human fixing and mech repairing, that was what the ‘bio’ in bioengineer stood for.

The kid would be ok. He would live and tell Ratchet why he fell from the sky, and maybe if he saw his friend Jazz….out there…….

.

.

—————————————————

:)) @keferon

(I swear I’m not insane, your AU is just kinda giving me infinite drawing stamina lmao)

The final design for Mecha Roddy is done hehe

Made the pilot suit for him + made the colors of his mecha a little bit more vibrant >:)

Also. Only now noticed the amount of gingers in this au ahahah. Jazz would walk to the big meetup for the first time and be like: WOW that’s a LOT of red hair for a single room.

(It would also be so fucking funny if Cybertronians (aka Prowl and Deadlock) struggle immensely trying to tell all the gingers apart from each other lmao.)

yt link

even after death he is still with him

That thing when you need five business days just to get inside the mech..

(The size differences in this au are getting progressively more insane lmao)

So. How about we give Rodimus something to do eh? How about that something being the whole sapient spaceship? How about that? ‘,:)

I I MEAN... Wanted something for the soul again and MOMU has a great affect on me by slowly feeding me the ideas for animations... I'm sure Ricochet is Jazz, change my mind, I have no idea how it will turn out but MHMM I HAVE SO MUCH GOOD VIBES FOR MY BRAIN FROM THEM

Song <- clickable link

Hello 👋,

I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞

The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔

Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊

Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉

https://gofund.me/58268669 🔗

If any of you guys can help, share or anything within your capabilities, please let's do it.

anything will, thank you!

Ang layo na natin sa isa't isa, paano na?

So uh Detroit : Become Human jazzprowl? Anyone? No? Just me? Okay-

*run and hide*

"Awakening the Sleeping Giant" p2

people seemed to like the first post so have a little more :)

might put it on ao3 later or something

-----------------------

The language barrier is a problem, Ulchtar finally decides once they touch down, and his new friend seems to agree.

He’d hit a snag in trying to describe where to go when he realized the Giant had been asleep for longer than English had existed as a language. Thankfully, gestures seemed to be more-or-less universal, so he was able to get across the idea of where to go eventually. They’re currently nestled in a cave somewhere in the Scandinavian mountains. It’s a remote place, especially after the alien attacks in the area a few years back. But he knows that this isn’t a permanent solution.

They need to learn to communicate before the inability to do so gets them both killed.

Which is why they’re now taking turns scratching out a massive diagram on the cave floor with sticks…Well, a stick and a small tree. They’d been trading words back and forth for a good two hours now. As best as he could tell, the Giant’s language was actually quite simple—consisting mainly of nouns, verbs, descriptors, and modifiers to those two things. It wasn’t particularly elegant, but it was versatile enough.

They’d started with things that were easily drawn-out or mimed: things like “person,” “me,” “you.” There was sort of a pronoun system, and the Giant…seemed to be a “he,” or an equivalent. Then they’d tried to build from there—he’d figured out some of the verbs, and how to phrase things as a question, and from there the two of them had hit it off. Now he was trying to get the guy up to speed, because everything would be a whole lot easier if they knew what was going on.

“So…[me-category-] human.” He points to the crude little figure of a human he’s drawn, and the Giant nods along.

How to explain the war…? “Humans [-planet-creation-positive-] Earth.” He points to the rough map of the world they’ve drawn out, then to the Giant’s rather detailed drawing of a kaiju. “[Planet-creation-negative-] Earth.”

They lean down a little closer to the drawing. “Quintesson,” he says with what sounds like outright distaste. Ulchtar’s a little taken aback by that.

“[Question.] Quintesson [-them. Name?]”

“[Name-positive.] Quintessons [negative-negative-negative.]” They confirm. Okay, triple negatives, so this guy hated the damned things just as much as anyone else. Maybe it wasn’t just Earth under siege…?

“Quintessons [motion-inside] Earth…[creation-negative] humans.” He’s painfully aware of his limited vocabulary, hoping it’s enough to get the point across. The Giant seems to pick up on the intent, tensing up just a little.

He continues. “Humans…[Eyes-positive-you. Humans-creation-negative, desire-negative.] So... [negative-brain-do-positive-you. Creations-do-similar.]” We found you. We didn’t want to die. We studied you. Tried to make things like you.

The Giant whirls towards him at that, picking him up to hold him at eye level. The grip is just tight enough to hurt, just enough to feel like a threat. “[You…complete-negative-me?]”

Ulchtar waves his hands in front of his face frantically, mortified. Oh, he’s really fucked up this time. He didn’t realize the Giant remembered getting taken apart like that. “[M-me-do-negative! Complete-positive-repeat!]” He sputtered. I put you back together!

It wasn’t technically a lie. He hadn’t exactly done it out of the kindness of his heart, but it wasn’t a lie.

The glare softens just a bit, the grip relaxing. He's not in immediate risk of death anymore.

They keep talking for a few hours, until it gets too dark to really see what he's doing anymore.

He hmms, trying to think of the right words…

“Uh…” He points up at the sliver of sky above them. “[Sky. Light-negative. Me-vision-negative.]”

“[…Recharge-you? Eyes-positive-me.]” He was offering to keep watch while Ulchtar slept, he mentally translated.

He nodded, fumbling mentally to figure out how to respond to that. “[…Gratitude-positive.]”

Then, another thought occurred to him. “[You. Name. Question?]”

The Giant paused for a second at that, wings drooping just a little bit. “[…name-knowledge-negative. Memory-negative-negative.]”

…oh.

Ulchtar can’t help but feel a little bad for asking now. He tries to shift the topic a bit, pointing to himself. “[Me. Name.] Ulchtar.”

That gets a tilt of the head. “[You. Name. Sound-similar…Star-sound-positive-positive-pitch-positive?]” In this language, the name and the phrase do sound kind of alike, actually. He laughs at that.  

“Star…scream? [Desire-name. Name-sound-positive-positive-positive.]” He adds three positives for emphasis, because it does sound way more badass than “Ulchtar.”

The ground shakes just slightly, and he realizes the Giant is laughing.

Don't get too attached, he reminds himself. They could betray you any second. He's just as dangerous as these Quintessons if he wants to be.

“Oh, knock it off…” He curls up on a relatively comfy-looking patch of cave moss, bundling himself up in some extra clothes in lieu of anything warmer. The cave’s warmer than outside, but still a bit chilly even with the ambient heat from the Giant’s engines heating it up.

It doesn’t stop him from eventually slipping into sleep.

-----------------------

The mech with no name shifts his weight just a little, trying to get comfortable in his hiding spot among the mountains. It’s not much—just a little nook in the rocks where it’s tough to spot him—but it’s better than being out in the open, as badly as he wants to stretch out his wings and fly again.

He doesn’t want to put the human—Starscream—Ulchtar—in danger.

Ulchtar’s the only companion he has in this world right now, after all.

So he’s probably going to stick with him for a bit—in no small part because he really doesn’t know where else he’d go. Most of his memory is long since corrupted, throwing him all kinds of errors whenever he tries to think back to before.

He knows, in broad strokes, what he is. He knows he’s a mechanical lifeform. He knows he’s a shapeshifter of some sort. He knows he can fly, and is probably designed to explore space. He knows what the parts inside of him are—what a spark is and that he needs to drink energon to survive. He knows the Quintessons want him dead.

But he doesn’t know who he is. His name. Where he came from. What his own species is called…

Does he have a species?

This whole world was filled with organic life, and nothing else—it was clear that the other machines he’d seen in that laboratory weren’t alive, but rather artificial constructs. They resembled him, but only superficially. He can’t feel their sparks, let alone any sort of EM field—something even the organics of this world have, albeit very faint ones.

Which leaves him with a very frightening question.

Am I alone?

His internal clock is telling him he’s been on this planet for six million years, trapped in stasis.

Surely someone must’ve looked for him, right? One of his kind, maybe? Surely six million years would’ve been long enough for a search party to find him.

If nobody had ever come looking for him, then…then either there was nobody left to send, or he’d mattered so little that nobody had ever bothered to remember him.

He wasn’t sure which hurt more: being alone, or being nobody.

Something wet drips onto his face.

Terrible time for rain, he thinks to himself.

But when he looks up, there’s not a cloud in the sky.

How odd…

He brushes it away, trying not to think about the question hanging over his head.

The night after that is largely uneventful, up until he notices a strange blue-green light on the horizon.

He pokes his head through the entrance. Was dawn supposed to come this early? Was it usually that color?

-----------------------

When he’s exhausted, Ulchtar is a pretty heavy sleeper.

That said, the fact that the Giant doesn’t wake him up when he moves away is still damned impressive. No, he only wakes up when it starts getting cold again. Still groggy, it takes him a few seconds to realize his vanished from his spot—something that makes him snap awake instantly in a panic.

He looked up towards the surface. Had he been abandoned? Was the Giant going back to—

Oh.

He sees his companion’s winged silhouette just beyond the mouth of the cave, illuminated in blue and green and violet.

He’s staring at something.

Ulchtar creeps closer, and quickly understands why. There’s an aurora snaking across the sky in full force above the mountains, and the Giant watches in wonder.

His wings twitch when Ulchtar draws near, as if sensing him somehow. “Starscream [recharge-positive?]” He asks. It seems like the nickname is sticking.

“[Recharge-positive],” he agrees. It’s another half-truth; he was sleeping fine until he got cold.

The Giant points up at the aurora, looking very confused. “[Occurrence. Name. Question?]”

“Aurora borealis.”

“[Common-positive? Threat-positive? Question?]”

“[Common-negative. Threat-negative.]” Ulchtar assures him.

He seems to relax a bit at that. “[Eye-similar…sky-heat-positive-light-positive.]”

“Yeah, kinda…” He really does not have the vocabulary to explain how the hell an aurora works. "The sky set itself on fire" is as good an explanation as any.

They nod along. “[Vision…positive-positive-positive.]”

That’s a lot of words to say “it’s pretty,” Ulchtar thinks to himself with a little smile, but jolts when his friend’s wings suddenly flatten against his back, an expression of…something like recognition on his face.

“[Name. Me. Memory-negative-now-positive. Sky-heat-positive-light-positive!]” He puts his hands together and looks to Ulchtar almost expectantly, as if he wants him to try translating this name too.

"...Skyfire," he decides after a few seconds.

The look "Skyfire" gives him at that...He's trying his best not to get attached, to do his best impression of a chessmaster moving his pawns around, but by God, if push came to shove he would kill for that smile.

The Mech Pilot Au by @keferon has me on a chokehold, so, I'mma procrastinate from writing an actual fic by just writing down incorrect quotes instead-

-----------------------

Swerve: We’ve found the person who stole your identity and was impersonating you.

Blur: Where were they?

Swerve: Eating cheetos and crying in their car.

Blur, impessed: Damn, they really went for it.

-----------------

Jazz: Helpful grammar tip: “farther” is for physical distance, “further” is for methaphorical distance, and “father” is for emotional distance!

-------------------

Prowl: I want to be with you for the rest of my life.

Jazz: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal.

Prowl, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

------------------

Blur: Why cant trees give off something important like wifi??

First Aid: So fuck oxygen, I guess.

-------------------

Prowl: Vortex isn’t answering my messages.

First Aid: Allow me.

Prowl: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi-

Vortex: *replying to message* Hello.

-------------------

*First Aid and Jazz enter a dive bar*

First Aid: Look, I know you’re disappointed but could we at least have a drink.

Jazz, in a scuba diving suit: I would like leave, please.

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Blurr: Here is my wall of inspirational people. Swerve: Is that a picture of you? Blurr: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

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First Aid: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, or malewife our way out of it this time.

Vortex: *cracks knuckles* Manslaughter it is!

---------------

Vortex: I can’t do this, it’s against my moral compass.

First Aid: YOUR MORAL COMPASS IS A ROULETTE WHEEL!

Vortex: …Your point?

-------------------

Jazz: First Aid is restricted to decaf for the rest of this adventure.

-------------------

Jazz: I told Swerve to grab snacks for everyone.

Blurr, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?

*Jazz, First Aid, and Swerve raise their hands*

*Vortext from the distance,also raising his hand*

--------------------

Jazz: I think we should have glow stick juice injected in our bones when we're born, so if we break our bones, we get a fun little surprise.

Vortex: What's the surprise?

First Aid: Blood poisoning.

--------------------

Vortex: The only thing keeping me from running away and hiding from society for the rest of my life is spite. I could disappear forever, but there are some bitches whose downfalls I have yet to witness, and I wanna be around when that happens.

------------------

Swerve: Why would anyone want to harm Blurr?

Vortex: Maybe because they met him?

Overtime.

Transformers Incorrect Qoutes

Megatron: Starscream is at that very special age where a kid only has one thing on their mind.

Optimus: mech?

Starscream: Homicide.

__________________

Drift: I have a plan.

Rachet: I have the hospital and Optimus on speed dial.

_________________

Drift, to the gang: If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands!

*silence*

Drift: Damn, y’all depressed as fuck!

Megatron: You didn’t clap either-

Drift: SHUT UP!

-----------------------

Megatron: Optimus...

Optimus: I can tell by the tone of your voice that you are disappointed. Alas, I must further disappoint you by affirming how little I give a fuck

Cybertronian Colloquialisms - Primes Edition

So we've all heard "By the AllSpark!" or "What in the Pit?" or "Oh Primus" in our TF media. However, I feel like TF writers are missing out on the goldmine that is colloquialisms invoking the different Primes. So, here is a small collection of such colloquialisms, and please, feel free to add more if you have any of your own you use.

"Primus below!" - Exclamation similar to "God above!", invoking the fact that Primus is the core of Cybertron.

"Vector give me patience" - Often paired with "because if Prima gives me strength, I'm going to need bail money." The go-to for when somebot if getting on your last nerves.

"To Alchemist!" - A popular drinking toast, to thank Alchemist Prime for inventing high grade.

"The Three Below" - Refers to Solus, Onyx, and Micronus, the three Primes who formed the Well of AllSparks

"Maximum Blessings on you" - a stealth insult/curse from some dialects, where "Maximum" and "Maximo's" are nearly indistinguishable. As Liege Maximo was the Prime of Lies and Trickery, it's a fitting way to wish someone ill.

“Solus’s slag pit” - Used for something incredible, awful, and incredibly awful. Often used to refer to the latest high society fashion mess.

"Find peace or take it up with the Fallen." - In other words, calm down or screw off.

“As you say, my Liege” - A condescending remark towards a person who’s attempting to lie, cheat or mislead.

Again, if you have any primal colloquialisms you use for your fics, reblog and share them with the rest of us.

meet the bayverse

I adore everything about the mech pilot AU but I am especially loosing over Prowl and Jazz’s relationship versus First Aid and Vortex’s.

Jazzprowl: “I have made myself vulnerable to you in ways inconceivable. I trust you to hold/to control my entire body. I don’t understand your words / you understand me beyond words. We make ourselves responsible for each others lives because neither of us can be trusted with our own. You could hurt me on accident so very easily, but the thought of you doing so is impossible to come to terms with. I trust you, I love you, I never want you to leave again.”

Texaid:

“This thing is going to FUCKING eat me.”

“You’re a bit of a freak actually. I’m going to savor you first.”

“THAT’S WORSE.”

Dramatic space romance vs SCP foundation

Megatron's "Not So Interesting' Life

So, I have this thought of an au for a while, where the war never happened but the world is littered with anomalies, entities and all that jazz, right? And Megatron, is just a normal mech, with a normal life, being friends with "normal" people and finding their newly crowned Prime off. Oh! He also gets these cool abilities that I have yet to properly set down-

If you have any ideas on what I should do with this story! Or questions! Let me know! Have fun!

_______________________

Megatron knows that he special he has always  known this. How could he not? From a young age, he could instinctively distinguish between a walking glitch of a fake and an actual mecha. It was as if his optics had been calibrated to detect the unseen threads of the universe. Shadows danced at the edges of his vision, and he always had the gnawing sense that something lurked just beyond his peripheral awareness. Not that he cared. In fact, he barely gave it a second thought.

Megatron has always known that he has abilities, that he has a gift. He knew this. He could see what others couldn’t. Yet, for the longest time, he refused to acknowledge it, treating it as little more than an inconvenient quirk. That was, until he befriended a few of those shadowy entities that liked to pass themselves off as part of the mortal world. He never really minded—they weren’t doing him any harm, again, he barely cared.

They are attracted to Megatron's gift, I mean, who wouldn't? Having the ability to sniff out someone's bull is pretty helpful.

You see, Megatron grew up in Kaon, and growing up in Kaon, which was and is a place dripping with superstition, Megatron had heard his share of horror stories: the dark, Unicron’s spawns, Primus’ Youngs, and the whispers of what prowled in the shadows. These tales were used to scare younglings into good behavior.

Megatron himself had his fair share of those stories, although, some of the elders do love to exaggerate those stories.

He likes it, not because it makes it creepy. He didn’t find them scary—he found them funny, mostly because of his friends. For reasons he still couldn’t quite fathom, his closest companions growing up were a spark eater, a ghoul, and a demon. Hearing their outrage over the inaccuracies in these tales was endlessly entertaining.

“You can’t eat a spark like that,” Starscream, the spark eater, would hiss in annoyance whenever he hears these ridiculous stories  . “Why do they always describe it like I’m slurping energon soup? There’s nuance!”

“Ghouls: do not hide under berths: waiting to snatch younglings” deadpanned Soundwave, the ghoul, glaring at Megatron. “Soundwave: not a sterotype: Stories; exaggerated”

And Shockwave, the demon of the group would just simply twitch in annoyance.

And unlike Iacon, who rarely has anything to do with superstitions and such beliefs were dismissed as primitive nonsense. (or as media likes to portray it). Kaon has plenty, it thrived on superstition, unlike Iacon,  If Kaon had a museum for the supernatural, it would probably need its own skyscraper.

Megatron can attest to it, as stated before, he is friends with some of the horrifying entities that the tales always tell. Not only that, He’d had his share of encounters with those dark forces, not all of them pleasant. Most of the time, it ended in one of three ways: a fight, a frantic escape, or an unsettling brush with death. The only reason Megatron was still functioning was thanks to his friends, who often bailed him out of tight spots to save his arf.

Yet despite all of this, Megatron barely cares.

He doesn't do much, than work at his boring office job, visit his friends and reassure them that he is well, one of the literally lives in Vos! But at least his trip is always payed, courtesy to his friend. Outside of that? His life is completely barren and uneventful.

That is, until he met the new Prime that goes by the name Optimus Prime. Not, met met him, more like saw him in the holos and the streets during the coronation parade. He didn't wanna be there to be honest, but Starscream wanted to be there, he was in town for royal duties as the Prince of Vos and he wanted to Megatron to hang out with him, that isn't the mech's lonely apartment or Soundwave's house, or Shockwave's lab.

And Megatron, is a friend, so Megatron decided to go with Starscream, begrudgingly of course. 

When Megatron first laid his optics on the New Prime, he immediately sensed something was off, and he can tell that Starscream noticed too, yet he seem calm, which was odd. Normally, Starscream would have been on high alert, his predatory instincts kicking in. But this time? He wasn’t reacting defensively. That wasn’t exactly a good sign, isn't a bad one either.

Spark eaters tend to have heightened senses, they have the ability to sniff out their pray, and they have the ability to semi manipulate the perception of others, making it easy for them to blend in. If Starscream wasn’t threatened, that meant whatever this “off” thing was, it wasn’t something Starscream recognized as dangerous—or perhaps it was something he couldn’t categorize at all.

Megatron looks at the Prime, observing him closely. Their newly crowned Prime seems nice, he speaks very confidently yet softly, a leader with stern yet does not weild his fist to cage those around him. He spoke to the crowd with warmth, crouched to address younglings optic-to-optic, and carried himself with an air of calm authority.

Megatron….he knows there is something wrong, something off with the Prime. Megatron could feel it, like static in his circuits. He wanted to dig deeper, to pull at the threads of this mystery. But before he could, Starscream interrupted.

Megatron has to put those thoughts into a file and store it for later to entertain his friend. A bored Starscream always never ends well.

Soundwave can attest to that.

So Megatron talks to Starscream as they watch the parade from the distance in the balcony of Starscream's  fancy hotel. They watch as the Prime mingle with the civilian, as he interacts with the younglings with such care.

“Ugh. Look at that pompous mech!” Starscream sneered, slumping dramatically in his chair.

Megatron arched an optic ridge. “What are you talking about? He seems fine.”

“Fine? Look at him, so pristine, so proper!” Starscream gestured wildly at the balcony railing. “He’s too sweet. It’s disgusting. He’s practically dripping syrup on those younglings!” 

"Shouldn't I be the one making complaints here? I'm the one who's gonna get affected if his rule is slag" Megatron quipped dryly, already dreading the new rules and laws that will be set if this Prime is like the other ones before him.

“Oh, please.” Starscream waved him off. “If it were up to you, you’d just brood in silence and not say a word.”

“I would, actually,” Megatron muttered. “Besides, you’re the one verbally attacking your own kind right now.” He pointed out, wanting to immediately change the topic, for all that is stands in this world, Starscream is right, he would probably just brood in silence, rules kept him safe after all.

Starscream makes a disgruntled noise. "That thing down there, is far from being my kin."

Megatron grows confuse, he looks at Starscream. "What do you mean?"

Starscream’s wings twitched irritably as he leaned back in his chair. “That thing down there is not my kin.”

That got Megatron’s attention. He turned to Starscream, optics narrowing.

Starscream huffed, clearly annoyed he had to explain. “Look at him! He’s too…off. Too stiff to be a spark eater, too mellow to be a ghoul. His frame doesn’t match anything I recognize. And his voice?” Starscream shuddered theatrically. “It’s wrong. It’s too nice. No one’s voice is that…perfect.”

Megatron frowned, glancing back at the Prime. Now that Starscream mentioned it, he can see more of the odd things about him. The balance of his movements, the precision of his words, the faint flicker of something beneath the surface—it didn’t quite add up.

Huh… Yeah, he can kinda see that now.

Changing the Story for Once Part 1 of Chapter 1

This is a royalty/isakai au I made a while back. I was inspired by the story called "Action" by Let's try some writing and a story called " Optimus Prime is destined to die" by Chuzillla.

And I decided, huh, you know what, why not? I have also posted this in Ao3 but this one is the revise version, I'm revising the story ever so slowly.

And I really wanna share it here but I was debating of it's a good idea you know.

Anyway,here's the summary; Orion Pax is a university student who ended up in one of his all time favorite novel. He has no idea how he ended up here, chaos ensues.

English is not my first language, so it's a mess.

_____________________________

Admist the glow of flickering screens and scattered datapads, Orion Pax was but an interesting figure, lost in the labyrinth of his own solitude. He was your typical university student who's faceplate is always buried in datapads after datapads, all day long. The epitome of a university hermit. His family tree resembled a barren wasteland, and his social life? Well, let's just say it made a hermit crab look like a party animal. 

He didn't have anyone aside for himself, he grew up with no sire nor carrier and he was just alone in life. He took odd jobs here and there to help him live and see another cycle. With no sire nor carrier to guide him, he wandered the corridors of life all by himself.

Despite such depressing situation, he always find solace on the novels he has accumulated throughout the years— one of which was his all time favorite, it was a story lace with tragedy of a fallen ruler who governed his kingdom with an iron fist, who used to carry the same name as he currently bore— a cruel irony he often found comfort in. He loved the story despite it's tragic and bittersweet end. It was the very first novel he had brought when his first paycheck arrived after grueling hours of being in one of his very odd jobs —the kind that left you questioning your life choices. 

Extra credits is extra credits, he cant say no to that. 

The novel was called “For Once”  and it was a very underrated masterpiece. One which Orion would talk about whenever he gets the chance, which he normally doesn’t so he opted to simply reread the darn thing over and over again to a point where he semi-memorize the entire plot. He had been reading it before he went into recharge, to try and distract him from the thesis paper he needed to write. The story was dark to say the least, but Orion was fascinated and again, it was the very first novel he had brought with his first paycheck.

He had joke to himself, about how his namesake was a terrifying mech, even slightly wished to have his confidence to avoid that glitched-arf mech that keeps tripping him down the mess hall. But then again, Orion Pax has a lot of problems that are far more important than that, not only he has a very barren social life but his student debt was astronomical.

He had already calculated it— at the rate he is going, his great-great-grandchildren might still be paying off his tuition fee— Primus, he really fragging hates the Iacon Academy, it’s a good academy, don’t get him wrong but damn it— it’s filled with assholes.  Another problem he has is his alarm clock being broken, and nothing else screamed ‘university life’ like missing your 8:30 lecture on the west hall because the universe seems to just hate you so much. 

But fate, seem to have a twisted sense of humor.  

__________________________            

Orion Pax awoke, blinking groggily, he rubbed his optics, half-expecting to find himself back in his cramped dorm room, tangled in his recharge cables with datapads scattered across the floor, and energon caffeine cans across his table from the nights he spend cramming for one impossible test. But as he looked around, he realized that this was in fact not his dorm—  he was in a lavish chamber, surrounded by opulent furnishings.

This wasn’t his very tiny space filled with his own mess— no, this place was…..way to fragging shinny. The walls were polished and they glistened under the lunars light.  

“This isn’t my dorm…..” Orion grumbled, rubbing his optics while yawning. He’s hoping that this is just another study-induced nightmare that he seems to get once every cycle. He sighs and sketches the mingling ache in his frame— he stands up and walked to the mirror, expecting to see his humble blue-and-red-slightly slender armored frame. What he saw was far from humble. He’s colors are still there, albeit less brighter than usual, he was decked out in a massive, bulky armor, which seems to have been polished.

His chestplate alone looked like it could stop a whole ass armada—Primus, it probably had . And his servos? They look like they could crash a datapad in one squeeze! (Not that he hasn’t done it before, accidentally…while studying..but still!).

This is not his body. “Primus…..By Primus fragging servo that slapped Unicron, what am I wearing!??” he yelped, backing away from the mirror like it had burned him. And by the matriarchs servos, why does his voice sound like that?! He stared at the reflection, his optics widening as the reflection glared back.

What he was seeing wasn’t Orion Slagging Pax staring back at him.  It was Optimus Slagging Prime…. 

“Oh no….oh no no no no no no! This—This cannot be happening! I’m-I’m dreaming! Oh Primus, please let this be a whole dream!!” His once semi-slender frame is now bulked with power and authority. It screams control and domination compare to his other one—which if you altered it to the side, he could be considered a femme by a very drunken mech!

And he had been considered as a femme once by a drunken mech!

Panic immediately seized him, his mind reeling with disbelief as he backed away, stumbling to the berth he layed. Orion Pax is known to be very calm and can work well being under pressure, he had done it several times!

But at that current moment— he momentarily lost this capability. With a barely functioning processor, he covers his mouth with his servo—

 And screamed.

 A very panic yet muffled scream.