You Know I'm Gonna Be Honest. I Don't Think All These Apps Really Need Access To My Precise Location

I Lied to you. We aren’t having sex, put your clothes back on. It’s time for me to explain to you the entire plot the Magnus archives and tell you which fear entity you would serve.

How come semi trucks in Europe look like “toot toot :)” and in North America they look like “HONK HOOOOOOOONK >:|”

I introduced my coworkers to the term "wet cat" and it's my favorite thing ever, anytime one of them just looks kinda sad they start yelling at them to stop being so wet cat

i'm just so, so grateful that the silt verses finale said this isn't a story where people get what they deserve. this isn't a story about showing mercy. the answer is not, and has never been, making self-righteous value judgements that you can justify to yourself in the telling later on. the greatest thing we can do in this world is to be kind to one another. to give without expecting anything in return. that's all that ever was, and ever will be, what we owe to each other. that's all.

no, spotify, i don't want to use ai to "turn my ideas into playlists". i already fucking do that with my brain and hands and i do it for fun. what, should i get ai to pet my cat for me? to play my silly games for me? to spend time with my beautiful wife for me? how about i rend you asunder

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

FUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKK

Here’s a video so you can hear the water and the thrushes. I took it for you because you couldn’t be there. <3