Hate Spiral - HoneyLily

he is like the sun, always bright and exuding warmth. he made me realise I must really be the moon, because oh dear god, I'm always eager to follow after him

All my life, I have been living for other people. Most of the decisions I have made were because someone else wanted me to make them. It's time to start living for myself, but I have no interest in life at all. Killing myself will be the most selfish thing that I will ever do, but at least it will be my own decision.

As a kinky autistic person, I love getting to unmask during sex oh my god.

Like getting to just smile and not care what my face is doing while going down on someone or something, getting to make whatever noises I want even if they aren’t overly attractive just because I’m enjoying myself and I want to show it. I love just asking flat out what they want me to do and seeing how they get flustered and stutter out an answer. I love the feeling of satisfaction in a task when I get them to finish. I love saying exactly how I’m feeling and how I feel about them and how much I’m enjoying myself no matter what I sound like while saying it.

Like this is the most vulnerable thing I could think to do with you, of course I’m gonna be my true self

“Absent Father“

1. “Hey “dad” I did it without you.”

2. “Having kids doesn’t make you a father raising them does.”

3. “My dad broke my heart way before any boy had the chance to.”

4. “If a man cannot be a father to his own child, there is nothing worse than that.”

5. “Just remember when you are ignoring her, you are teaching her to live without you.”

6. “He was supposed to be the first male love of her life search for him everywhere.”

7. “A father may turn his back on his child, but a mother’s love endures through all.“

8. “Respect to all moms doing double duty because of men failing to do their part as dad.“

9. “When you grew up with an absent father, you grew up dreaming and wanting.“

10. “Don’t forgive him. Forgive yourself for believing there is something lacking in you because he wasn’t there.“

11. “One of the saddest things in this world, is to see a child grow up hating one of their parents -father

12. “I miss the father you never were.”

13. “There's nothing worse than a man that can be everything to everybody

else except a father to their own child.“

I did my best to be lovable.

i think I bother everyone by being alive

second choice second choice second choice!! wonderful!! love that for me ! only talk to me when everyone else has to go ! I won't notice ! I dont care ! me ? never !

"So you're a people pleaser? Let's flip this around. You're a person too. Please yourself."

Actual quote from my coworker today. And man did that hurt.

Sitting around waiting to be messaged and flirted with and paid attention to