I'm Ok With Being Human Shaped If I Can Do It Eerily. With An Unsettling Air About It.

I understand this completely. I personally knew about the therian community well before I ever labeled myself as one, but as an outsider, I was always too nervous to call myself one because of a lot of the conflicting information that I would hear. I didn't know if I followed enough of the "rules" to consider myself a therian, even if I'd known I'm an animal for a long time. I call myself a lot of labels, I personally don't mind what others call me.

I'm an animal, I grew up like one. Others treated me as one. The only thing that changed was the empowerment I felt when I started openly referring to myself as one.

it's interesting to me when therians speak of having an "awakening" when it comes to their theriotypes. I don't mean this in a invalidating kind of way, just in a "we have very different experiences and I want to discuss that" kind of way. i never had an "awakening", because i felt like an animal from as early on as i could remember. all my life i knew that i wasn't human. that if given the choice, i would swap my body for an animal one in a single heartbeat. if i had never heard of the word therian, it really wouldn't have mattered, because I WOULD STILL BE AN ANIMAL. when i found the term therian, my hesitance was not at all from "am i an animal or not" because i knew that i was. it was more... me doubting my understanding of the specific term. "is this a spiritual term only? would i be using it incorrectly?"- i was afraid to upset anyone. to step on toes. "am i an animal" was never even a question for me because it was always a YES.

Streaming idea. The first Saturday of every month I stream Portal 2 (Portal 1 or Co-op occasionally to spice it up bit). I play the whole game, beginning to end, all in one stream. I do NOT speedrun it. I play it like it's my first time experiencing it over and over again. Every month. I take the same amount of time to figure out a puzzle as I did last time. I launch myself into the nasty goo just like I did last month. Nothing changes.

You get the same rant about how much I love Doug Rattmann every month and at the end of every stream I devour a slice of black forest cake while the credits play.

Anyways, that's my pitch here's my Rattmann Playlist:

A list of my nonhuman/regression gear but it slowly turns less and less stereotypical:

1. My masks and tails. I love making masks and currently have 2 that I kept for myself. I also have a crow one I bought. I have 3 tails; wolf, coyote, and raccoon. Most I got from a renfaire I work at sometimes but I got the raccoon one from my partner because she's the best :3

2. Collars. Nuff said. Very dog. Very good.

3. Paw gloves and fingerless gloves :p

4. Chewtoys. I like biting stuff.

5. Stuffies. Specifically my raccoon and frog ones. All my stingray ones, too.

6. Small paw print blanket. Very soft. Good thing to just hold. Also my big knitted blanket. Good texture

7. My journal. Nice leather journal, my brother got me that I just fill with random thoughts and recipes. Helps me feel more creaturey.

8. Trinket shelf. I love trinkets and cool rocks. I also got a lot of bones.

9. Sticks. I have sticks everywhere from walks.

10. Paper crown and flower crown. Feels creaturey.

11. Compass necklace. There's a lot of misc. jewelry I consider gear but this one stands out.

12. My converse. All my converse. They feel like paws. I will only ever wear converse or my docs. My main 3 shoes are my glow in the dark bug converse, black converse with doodles all on em, and my brown converse specifically decorated with therian stuff.

13. My jacket and shirts. My green jacket is hgh. Me. It's me. I love that jacket. My color is green and it makes me feel like I'm me again. Its very soft too. Also, a shirt my girlfriend made me that has cut off sleeves and a bleached ribcage design that's really cool. Also have two sweaters that are very crittery and my Gorillaz shirt with their first album cover on it.

14. Anything minecraft related. I have a lot of minecraft stuff. One because I really like to play the game but also cuz it's home and I miss it.

Anyways, gear can be whatever. Have fun. (Also please talk to me about your gear that other people wouldn't really consider gear I love hearing about it.)

Dudes healthcare is so fake. My ADHD meds are $940 without insurance. But they gave me a website of "coupons" which straight up looks like a scam website, and I got it today for $60! Just a coupon from a random website and it was $900 cheaper. America, I am confusion!! America explain!!

Evil tics want me dead (I've been doing the same annoying tic all week)

Listen to Preston people

Some older art I either never posted anywhere or still think is cool or both.

1 & 2. More detailed background practice. First one is Tom from Eddsworld, the second is my bro sitting in our imaginary apartment.

3. Stupid Eddsworld doodle

4. Another background practice piece but also because I really wanted to draw my baby girl Quinton being silly in a radio room. I love them.

5. Technically concept art? It later inspired a videogame concept called Catastrophe Castle. This is the main antagonist. I use me and my friends as inspiration a LOT.

6 & 7. Pixel art I made for a silly slasher au I made of me and my friends. I randomized all of our roles and made it into a big murder mystery. It never really went anywhere, and I lost access to the account I was using to post art, but I still liked it. It was my first time really trying to do pixel art, and I had a blast.

8 & 9. More videogame concept art. It was a game called Blue Noise. It looks depressing, but it was more of a gloomy slice of life with a happy ending.

10. My design for the communicators I imagine are used in Minecraft. I know nothing about tech. I just like the idea of mashing together a lot of other technology together into one device.

God,

Let me marry my wife

Let me make a home

where all the ghosts of the kids I grew up with can feel safe.

Let me show my future children

that their differences are beautiful.

Let me live long enough

to have younger queer kids view me as a sign that they can prevail,

that things get better.

God,

Let things get better.

i saw in ur therianthropy day that you have a pack!! could i ask how you went about finding them?

They're just my irl friends :]

I got really lucky with my girlfriend also being an alterhuman. I grew up in a small town where every alternative kid just clung to one another. My group doesn't really call itself a pack, but I see them as my pack. We're like a family. We talk to each other all the time. They don't mind when I act dogish and even join me at times (hence the howling at the moon comment). It also helps that we have a weekly hangout where I can crowd them into my home and just watch over them while they relax. It itches my dog brain just right.

I think community is everything. So if you're looking for a pack, or at least something you consider a pack and you dont want to look online, focus on that. Only one other person in mine is an alterhuman. The rest are humans. Focus on finding people you can be your most authentic self around and encourage them to be themselves. It doesn't have to be a big group. Some packs are just made out of a wolf and their mate. It can just be you and someone you care about.

The most important part of having a pack to me is respect and support. It does wonders for my mental health and gives me so much species euphoria to have such a good support system.

So if you can find some folks in your area who you can trust, and who even if you don't say it explicitly still accept your identity with all of its traits, I think you've got yourself a pack :]

Anyways! A pack is different for everyone, so if you are looking for a pack made up of alterhumans, this post may not have helped, lol. But I hope maybe it gave you something.

Hanging out with my girlfriend annnnnd my pack for therianthropy day? Don't mind if I do >:3

(I'm going to make them go howl at the moon with me)