I’ve Grown Tired Of Trying To Gain Your Attention, It’s Obvious That You Do Not Reciprocate. I Deserve

hi, Im still alive. Just going through stuff. Still with my darling.

i wish he cared for me as much as i cared for him.

Trigger Warning

i laid down on the hard sidewalk, staring at the stars while tears filled up in my eyes.

I impulsively messaged a old fp & while he instantly responded with positivity like he always has.

Simultaneously, my current fp messaged me back, responding to my response of his story on insta. 

I don’t even know why I’m crying, sure, maybe it’s because my dad has cancer, my childhood friend/bully died the other day, my uncle is in the hospital after being found unconscious on the floor, we are being kicked out our apartment, and im here weeping over stupid shit like why doesn’t he love me back…

we all love him, we just express it in different ways.

utterly broken, my lover has disappeared.

i feel so empty without him.

please god bring him back to me.

FUCK YOU! I TRIED TO FORGIVE YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME! I WAS HAPPY FOR YOU AND YOUR SUCCESSES! I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HERE FOR YOU & YOU TREAT ME LIKE THIS! FUCK YOU!

i may have found my high school sweetheart again.

nothing hurts more than when you are in love with him & he is with someone else…

happy birthday to me. 21.

gosh i miss him. his laugh & his voice. come back to me darling.