I Feel Sick And Anxious Im Not Trying To Be A Brat Or Talk Against You Or Anything I Just Don’t Feel

I don’t know why I try to do anything I am so untalented and fucking retarded and stupid oh my fod I need to die I want to slit my wrists I want to fucking hang my self I hate myself so fucking much I can’t take it I want to kill myself i want to die why haven’t I died yet why am I still here I have no purpose I hate everyone I want to die

Have you ever thought that the reason those people you thought were “ride-or dies” or “day 1s” fall out with you because you’re the problem? Have you ever fucking taken accountability in your stupid fucking life ever? Absolutely not, you’re just an innocent esoteric victim who just has so much love for the world right. Fucking lol.

Maybe you deserve to lose those friends. You Definitely lost me. I enjoy leading You on though because I think you deserve a false sense of security and maybe one day I could just crush you. I don’t Know about that either honestly, if you were caught on fire I wouldn’t even piss on you. I’d enjoy the show.

It really is all your fault. If anyone is the weird one it’s you. Maybe get a personality besides a poor esoteric mysterious shithead and maybe people could actually tolerate you instead of pretending to tolerate you. I’m glad you know I’ve distanced away, but don’t you dare blame it on me. Maybe if you were actually likable and not an annoying cunt people would genuinely like you instead of pretending to care about you. Let’s face it: nobody ACTUALLY likes you. But I don’t know what people would want out of someone as worthless as you, either.

Do the world a favor.

I genuinely have never hated myself more than I do now nothing makes me feel better anymore I am just rotten

I actually have not been this freaked out in forever I broke my self harm streak my stomach is swollen from how hard I beat myself everything hurts I just can’t do it anymore

Everything just hurts

It hurts less more and more everyday but I am still sad over you kinda. I miss you. Sometimes I want to unblock and go back to you but I know that wouldn’t ever happen and that’s okay.

What is wrong with me why do I engulf everything and make it miserable why am I just the worst Fuckifn person on the planet

I relapsed and it didn’t fucking do anything of course I’m so tired I want to drill the blade into my disgusting body and just die and bleed out I fucking hate myself and my life I want to die

I feel like im so selfish. I hate this. I don’t want to be messy. I don’t want to be an attention seeker or anything. I don’t want to be this way. I don’t know how to get better or how to inspire myself to get better. What do I Fucking do? I’m so lost. I’m so lost and I don’t know where to go or what to do. I feel so fucking dumb

I’m trying so hard to act normal it genuinely feels awful again like what the actual fuck is going on please don’t hate me I feel weird talking about that whole situation with my friend she just made things so much worse . It makes me feel like everything has come crashing down again . I don’t know why im like this but I am and I just wish that people could see past that because I am more than my mental illnesses I just can’t do it man