Wanting To Kill Your Best Friend Because He Got With The Girl You Like And Then Married Said Girl- —-

Family Discussions

Second hobbit movie - Laketown scene

BFF: Are those pugs?!?? What are pugs doing here!! Are there pugs in the book?

I feel like I will add Booster Gold to the family … maybe … just because I know it’ll fuck with the JL heads.

Ghost Helpline

Like just-

Everyone running around trying to figure this shit out fucking freaking out about everything.

Booster takes one look at this “threat” Konstelacio: oh Konny!!! I wonder what she’s been up to lately hopefully not pulling anymore jobs for CW anymore last time I heard she was sentenced to community service or something

….

Booster what the fuck?????

Ghost helpline chapter 37

Jason couldnt help but give his entire family the side eye. Seriously Bruce? A family dinner? Family dinner with thier nieghbors?? That he has a crush on ???!!! Pppfff oh yeah this was going to work out swimmingly. Whatever.

Jason didn’t know why he felt so knotted up inside about the whole thing. It’s not like they were going to find anything and “Brucie” has had plenty of guests over before. And yet Jason felt snubbed, Bruce knew Jason wouldnt be able to join in. He was still legally dead and couldnt just pop into joint family dinner like “oh yeah I got better dont worry about it”. No Jason would need to steer clear of the mannor all together.

Meanwhile his siblings would get to tease dad about his crush, grill the Masters family and talk to Damiens new friend. Because seriously Damian making friends, with a normal girl? Just wow. Good for the kid, because he defiantly hadn’t learn that from Bruce he scoffed for fucking hells sake even Vad had a sketchy criminal history on his buisness Dalv co.

It stung, it was so fucking stupid but it stung. Why didn’t Jason get to be there. Why didn’t he get to shovel talk Bruce’s crush, eat Alfred’s food, sit around awkwardly, and tease Damian relentlessly?

Jason knew why. He did. Logically Jason knew it wasn’t an attack on him. That Bruce hadn’t purposefully done things this way to exclude him. That he was/n’t an embarrassment, dangerous and unwanted to meet Bruce’s new crush because he couldnt be trusted. It wasn’t personal, it’s not personal.

Beep beep

Jason glanced down to his burner phone and grinned manically at the photo of the skunk haired man he’d been tracking strolling into a warehouse… ..with someone young and pink on their arm. Jasons stomach rolled in disgust at the age difference, “Well hello misplaced aggression.”

——

Damian had been hanging around the Masters manor regardless of fathers …complications of the heart. He and Violet needed to plan a strategy of course. The plan had to be seem-less to even stand a chance of working. A part of that involved English lessons which thankfully doubled as a cover. Damian huffed to himself as Violet failed to write neatly again. It was odd to watch, she could speak with a fair sense of clarity and understood difficult concepts when spoken to but written language seemed to illude her. It was frustrating to watch, her hands moved wrong twisting against the pencils and often snapping them. Damian watched as her hand seemed to twitch uncomfortably as she finished.

“You’re bad at this.”

“Gee thanks I had no idea.”

“Tt. It’s ridiculous anyone as old as you should know how to read and write at a higher level than a sixth grader.” Damian felt his hand fall down his face, “You text just fine though, your horrid grammar aside.” Meaning a big part of the problem was physical….now that he thought about it … he hadn’t seen Violet without her human disguise despite already knowing her secret. Both forms had gloves. There’s something else going on here.

The assassin felt ice at his back.

“Let me see your hand.”

That coldness remained as a small warmth was thrown against his chest as she unthinkingly shoved her hand in his face and ate away at her sugary processed snack- dirtying her practice writing paper further.

Taking off her gloves gave sight to three short claws black from tip to knuckle, two fingers incased in a familiar metal. He hadn’t expected it at all, was Violet allowing him to see this purposefully? A limitation of her glamor? A benefit of their bond?

Beep beep

Damian dropped the others hand to glance at the text. Father did what!?

“What do you enjoy eating?” What do demons even eat? Can demons be vegans? She does look a tad like a ram.

“Red and dad make the best cakes!!!”

“Tt. I meant real food, and I’m sure you will change you mind at tomorrows dinner. Alfred’s desserts are superior to all else.” He planned to ignore her millionth mention of “Red”, she was beyond obsessed and he was not falling for the bait… again. Ugh.

Violet stilled, “Oh are you staying for dinner tomorrow.”

“No it would seems our fathers have gotten it into their minds to bring us all into their nonsense.” Damian huffed.

Violet groaned, “Uhhh nooo I don’t want to.”

“Yes well as detestable as it will be -“

“Not that I just, I don’t like eating in front of humans.”

A delicate eyebrow rose at the statement.

“This isn’t “real food”, human food isn’t my food.” Blood guts crunching on a heart like an apple, wide green eyes staring at her horrified. Scared.

Damian thought about it more. Pencils breaking, the way her hands shook and holding a fork was probably difficult for her?

“So what do you consider food to you?”

“Anything.”

“Violet.”

“Anything I’m a scavenger demon …” her eyes rolling at the look on his face, “Tendons, bone, eyes, decorative flowers and overgrown weeds. You could say we are real … vultures.” She chuckled at her inside joke.

The way she spit out the term “scavenger demon” had him reeling a-bit. There was an obvious issue there… somewhere. Fear slithered threw the bond unwillingly, self deprecating and shallow. He at least understood this feeling well.

The feeling that screamed :

Don’t look at me. Don’t look at me like /that/.

Well he supposed he at least knew a good dish to have made for her. Hopefully Alfred wouldn’t mind a change in the menu.

—- —— —-

Bruce was NOT freaking out he wasn’t! And he will deny it forever. He just really wanted this to go well. He needed this to go well.

And he loves his children deeply! But sometimes they could all be a bit much….

At… family dinners. They yelled and fought and they were all fairly high strung but the Masters weren’t like them half of them looked like a strong breeze could knock them over dear lord….

“Bruce!”

“Bruce.”

“B!”

“Ow!!”

….please just, just don’t fight in front of Vlad.

—- —- ——

The triplets, sans Ziyad, positively swarmed their fathers closet. This was going to be great!

Klarion and Billy looked over at Dandy’s murderous face, this was going to be awful.

Bard (After pack bonding with Thranduil): I would die for you

Legolas(freaking out on the inside): please don’t Ada will be sad

They need to imply it was the GIWs fault !!!!

hhd

So we all know of Dan's whole planetary annihilation in the past leading to heroes from the future showing up to stop him, right?

Well I'm gonna take that and tweak it a bit.

Time Traveling Hero goes back in time, sees Dan talking to a ghost informing him that the High Queen has finally allowed him back into the Royal Castle and he says "Can't wait." With a nasty smile.

Dan had lost his temper a few months ago, and mom the twerp had told him he had to go outside and think about what he did. But now, he was finally being let back in. And he had a few ideas on how to mess with him in retaliation for being reverse-grounded.

Ah I see I was mostly thinking of the cult being like hive academy.

Maybe instead of physical training they just taught him to be an excellent actor lolz idk just a funny fanfic prompt

You know I bet Tim with his Flying Grayson/Dick Grayson obsession as a kid probably found lost footage of the time Dick promoted a cult while brainwashed on national television

Family Discussions

After watching the first hobbit movie

Me: Elrond has the patience of a saint

BFF : yeah but I somehow feel like Lindir has to put up with more bs

Me(internally): she understands

Battinson the only Batman too 100% take to Tims coddling!

I mean he can’t really stop the kid.

Tim says he has to sleep? Well okay.

Tim says he beat that guy up too much? Well okay.

Tim says he needs to eat more? …. Okay but Tim need to eat with him.

Tim goes back to his own place… well Tim’s not actually his kid…. He’s gonna text him anyway.

Wait where are his parents??? Shit. Tims his now, tim chose him!

Tim try’s to be unhealthy independent and battison just cries. He’s not sure how but this is obviously his fault!!

say what you will about Battinson, he would never hurt a child.

he would frantically try to bubble wrap each and every one of them. he probably carries snacks for kids he meets on patrol.

Ghost Helpline part 7

“What exactly did she say?”

“I’m telling you bats she just went ‘Questions cost extra’ and then the two of them just disappeared into thin air!!” Arsenal couldn’t fucking believe this, they had been talking in circles for five minutes. The girl left Roy feeling off balance, she creeped him out. There he said it she creeped him the fuck out! A part of him was so unsettled by her all he wanted to do was shoot both those fuckers and be done with it. Then he pushed that unpleasantness down and looked again. All he saw was a tired tired kid. Had he ever been that tired as Speedy? Now he was pushing all those feelings down again because now he didn’t want to kill her or sympathize with her, he guessed some part of being a father had made him weak, now all he wanted were answers!!

Tim was begging to grow worried for Bruce Batman. It was clear to Tim that he was spiraling, understandably, all security forage in the watchtower had come up as static. Glitching widely, the best picture they could capture was of the floor covered in fire Konstelacios metallic boots in the corner. There were no leads; no ancient murals, crumbling statues or off handed anecdotes in a dead man’s journal. Nothing. And according to the team on dragon watch duty there were possibly even more threatening players involved. A group of people strong enough to take down a villain that thwaped Superman like a fly. It was unnerving for Tim, which only meant it must be driving Bruce Batman up a wall. Tim worried.

—- — —-

Konstelacio arrived at Masters Manor with her friend approximately 10 minutes later. A headache forming in between her ears and a sigh escaping her.

All of her brothers ran about packing their things, “See I told you she’d be back! She’s fine.” Konstelacio didn’t bother to check which one of them had spoken, it hardly mattered.

“I’m heading down to the lab, I need to use the portal.” No one answered as she took Aragons hand and descended the steps.

“Whelp, time to face the music buddy.” She pouted, listening to Uncle Dans lecture was going to be a pain.

—— — — —-

Booster came back three days after the meeting, a whole day and a half before Captain Marvel, with a massive concussion .It was a mistake.

Family Discussions

BFF: I still can’t get over Thorin kicking the dwarves during the troll incident

Me: yeah it was his turn with the brain cell

BFF: oh that’s why you like the dwarves so much theyre dumb !!!

Me (getting ready to refute it - remembers what happens later): okay you got me