Sprite: I HATE YOU WITH EVERY INCH OF MY BODY KINGO!

Eternals as John Mulaney quotes:

Sprite:

Ikaris:

Kingo:

Phastos:

Ajak @ Ikaris:

Makkari:

Sersi:

Dane:

Druig:

Druig @ Makkari:

Gilgamesh @ Thena:

Riven: You stay positive.

Riven: You always believe that everything is going to work out, how you do it?

Flora: Well...

Flora: I tell you my secret, Riv.

Flora*inhales*: I lie to myself, every morning when I wake I say...

Flora: Everything is going to be ok...

Flora*looks at the floor*: But I’m lying.

Flora: And I Don’t know how much longer I can do this to myself...

Riven: I feel like I open a scar. I’m just gonna leave ok?

Flora: Ok:)

Bloom: Damn the power went out.

Stella:Don’t worry I got this.

*Stella shakes rapidly and starts to illuminate*

Bloom: What-

Stella: i swallowed a flaslight.

Bloom on the verge of cardiac arrest: WHY WHOULD YOU-

Stella: I mean I rather die hot, than live ugly. So if this is going to take 10 years of my LIFE I Don’t care.

Riven:What the fuck is wrong with my shirt now?

Stella: It’s ugly, I miss when you used to where tops.

Riven: Bitch.

Stella:Asshole.

Riven:Please don’t take me shopping.

Stella:Oh its happening, you can go around the world with ugly clothes. People will notice.

Riven: Do you think they would notice the crazy lady that is with me, if I scream?

Mobius: So what do you think?

Loki *pissed*: What are this?

Mobius: The chairs you wanted...

Loki: Was I not clear? Where the fuck are chivari chairs?

The organazier: This are the chivaries.

Loki: You shut the fuck up. YOU! I couldn't been more specific, I asked you to find me a caterer who had the GOLD chiavaris with the white cushons, you had one job!

The organizer: That was my fault, I thought we had those but we were mistaken.

Mobius: Dear, I think any of this could work.

Loki: GoD dammit! Why does everything had to suck! This is my fucking wedding day. For one day! FOR ONE DAY!

*stars smashing things*

Loki: THE GOLD CHIVARIS WITH THE WHITE CUSHON!

The organizer: Sir, I can call around.

Loki: It's miss. And I thought I told you to shut the fuck up. Are you dumb? Ah Broke? Do you want Asgard in war with you? Answer me.

The organizer: Yes, I'm dumb.

Loki: Yes he's dumb! That's why we had the fucking mix up!

*takes a deep breathe*

Loki: Sorry, this is my fault I put too much on your plate.

*leaves pissed*

The organizer:WoW.

Mobius: Pfff.... She can be like that.

Musa: Do you have a pencil?

Riven: Why?

Musa: Because I want to erase our past, and write our future.

Riven *its on the verge of years*: Thats.. I...

Musa: And also I lost my pen so I need one.

Preast: Do you take Brandon Hall to be your lawfull wedded husband?

Stella:.... There’s been a mistake

Audience:*gasps*

Brandon: Stella...

Stella: This is a mistake... THOSE FLOWERS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE WHITE BLOOM! YOU HAD ONLY ONE JOB AS MY BRIDESMAID! ONE!

Phastos *signing*: Uhmm what did you with our ship?

Makkari*signing*: Uhm, I'll let Druig answer that.

Druig *signing*: So you know we had a lot of time and well she rebordered the cylinder, modified the intake valves on the injection system, added a blower and installed a 5 pound nitrous thank.

Makkari*signing*: And he put some cool stickers!

Kingo: You know normal couples have sex.

Sky: A murderer becomes a serial killer with just 2 more kills.

Riven: Damn, that's a motivational quote! I'd put that on my wall...

Riven: I'd prefer that to like: Live, Laugh, Love.

Riven: We could put it right up there.

Sky:*facepalm*

The winx and the specialists after watching FATE.

Flora: So that was something... guys?

Bloom: I have to ask, am I so self centered? And annoying? And why Stella and I hate each other? Ugh it dosen’t make sense. And Sky and Stella, hell to the no.

Stella: Of course not, why the fuck did i date Sky? And why I’m such bitch? And where is my honey buckets. And i love fashion, it’s not and obligation. My mum is nice ok? Im confused...

Layla: At least they didn’t make you the black token friend, dont get me wrong she seems nice and all but that’s not me.

Flora: I Don’t meant to be rude but why i’m white? I look like a grown women, and why Riven and I treat eachother badly, he’s my friend. I miss Helia. I didn’t like it a LOT im sorry netflix. The only good think is the diferent body representation.

Musa: Fuck this shit, im not white either, gosh. Why the fuck im a empath? And why im dating that Sam dude hes not my type. I only talk to Riven ONCE, why?And why the fuck he dates that beatrix and not me? I Don’t get it.. At least my personality was kind of cool...

Tecna: At least you guys where in there. Why im not good enough for their shitty show? Ok, but I do have to say this, at least like Musa says they didn’t fuck me up. But I’m no quite happy, that they don’t consider me one of the Winx, that’s kind of irrespecful.

Timmy: Of course you’re good enough, i love you. They screwed it up. I’m actually a little bit happy that im not in there, at least they didn’t ruin me.

Helia: I think the same thing as you Timmy, But i didn’t like what they did too my flower.

Brandon: I’M GOING TO KILL SOMEONE. Why they make my sweet honey buckets like that? And why she’s dating Sky?He’s my best friend and she’smy girlfriend. Gosh don’t they have some respect for us, or what?

Nabu: Im not there, and i hope not to be, because for sure the will kill me again. And they make the Black token friend like they did with Layla..

Sky: I quite like my caracther.. I just Don’t like the fact that I dated Stella. But my dad is alive,why would they kill him? Uhmm, Riven are you good?

Riven: MUSA WITH THAT BORING ASSHOLE? GOSH. WHO THE FUCK WRITES THIS? THE RIVERDALE WRITERS OR WHAT?

WHY THE FUCK IM BYPHOBIC?

 AND why i fat shame Flora? She’s my mate. 

I Don’t smoke it’s not healty, im a healty person.

And fuck no, i Don’t wanna fucking date the trix. And it’s Musa my girl, not that Beatrix. FOR GOD SAKE. I ONLY DATED DARCY, BECAUSE I WAS POSESED. ONE TIME, ONE FUCKING TIME. I HATE THIS. 

 And why my fucking best friend is Sky, that dosen’t make sense. I HATE IT. I WILL MURDER THEM AND DESTROY EVERITHING THEY LOVE.