fredwendelin

Latest Posts by fredwendelin

How

I didn't have THE internet while growing up. It just didn't exist. So I didn't have a lot of resources for research...

...seeing as "actual" books were hard for me to read. No attention span. I could only read Isaac Asimov. I think the last thing I read from him was this thing about robot dogs??

Now? Now there are a ton of tools to double-check facts. And I'm drowning in them. Frankly, internet is being too much for me. But my sister? She's thriving. She peruses the internet wonders as if they aren't a headache in disguise.

How????

C&D Book Update #7

So, I arrived at chapter 51/70 (second draft).

The plan is: 1) finish second draft (it's only about fixing things in red), 2) redo three specific things that aren't working, two of them entire chapters, 3) finish third draft (actually and seriously re-reading everything again), 4) finish the fourth draft (after at least a month of not reading anything).

But what I wanted to write here is this: I know, everyone must know this, but I feel like I'm feeling this in my bones now. How every character, even the minor and evil ones, are really a part of me. How I bled into every single one. And I realize now that THAT is what made writing C&D so painful. It made me raw, as if I picked up a sword and slammed it into my heart again and again, until I had enough blood to form a being. It damn hurts. But maybe that's why this book ended up so precious to me. Later chapters (I think 55+?) are my best writing ever, by far. And it's entirely because I dropped pretense and wrote with the worst of the shadows I've ever faced.

Maybe that's why writing the final chapters was so difficult. I procrastinated for like, 2 months?

But 2 needed months. If I had rushed, the ending would be shitty. "I have to trust the process..." a friend (who passed away) used to tell me this all the time. I guess he was right in ways I couldn't even fathom. I hope that smug bastard is smiling at me from whatever plot smug bastards go.

Where does chocolate milk come from? I’ve heard brown cows but part of me doesn’t want to believe it.

That’s a good instinct! The true story of chocolate milk (and all chocolate!) begins not at our local pasture, but with the rare and beautiful beans of the Brazilian rainforest

I'm watching this christian video and...

...I'm having trouble finding the right verse? Because this person is going on and on about Bible verses on how to be a good wife for her husband, but for some reason, I can't find the verses about being a good husband to your husband. is there a Bible-Part 2 I didn't see/buy in the bookstore?

What are books but a fanfiction of reality?

Older Disney movies, too.

They were heavy on the marriage trope, as well...

C&D Book Update #6

I've arrived at chapter 33.

I thought it'd go quickly from there... I was doing so good...

Now I've spent like, 3 hours trying to rewrite like, 5 sentences? Of course, it's dialogue. Of course.

I need it funny, I need it interesting, but it's coming as bulls.

But at least I already finished the first draft??

C&D Book Update #5

Spent my whole Sunday fleshing out chapters 57+. Added chapter 70 today as well, after the idea for it just crossed my mind before bed yesterday.

I found I'm a really silly person. Also, shameless.

Chapters 57+ don't look polished yet, but I love them! It was so much fun...

Now I want to just immerse myself in the book I wrote and enjoy it, but I think I have to fix all the red marked phrases first. They have bad wording, or are too old (discarded ideas), or n other reasons... they are bad. And they need to go.

I feel lazy just thinking about it, but hey, no one will do it for me.

C'mon...

F can do it!!

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Each writer brings new fish to the table.

Mine is dark, and its eyes are rainbow.

S-S Book Update #1

It started as a fic, now it's shaping out to become a book. The playlist is dope.

But what surprised me the most?

The main pairing is... hetero.

Man + woman.

What am I doing with my life?? hahah

I don't write a hetero main pairing since... 2009??????

Wanna whole lotta love?

[OC] sinner & frankie from my fictional rock band🎸💥

Letter to my young self

I saw someone doing this and I thought, what about me? How would I write it?

And then I realized I'd only write,

"Don't die."

Just that.

That would leave my younger self wondering, "wtf will happen that makes my older self say this???"

And really, that's all I needed to hear. Not fake words. Not fake touches.

Just a steady, linger a bit more.

I just got my first tattoo

It's a simple one, but Goshhhhh did I worry about the pain.

And it was like, super comfy pain level. Honestly. Maybe I had too many bad experiences in life (and I did), many of them involving horrible pain levels, but really...

Like, every time I have to do a lab exam, the nurses can't take my blood easily. They fumble, they insert the needle like 7 times, and with the needle inside my skin they move it like it's a Carnaval of sorts.

That's waaaay more painful than tattoos.

The last time I cut my hair? The guy cleaned my hair with so much force I ended up crying my balls out. The pain level that time was like, 20 times worse than getting a tattoo.

What I did? I saw someone get inked first, saw how it was handled, got some music going in my phone, and sat for it. It was really peaceful! (I say this to all autistics out there fearing the processs like I once feared it...)

Sooooo... yeah. I'm already planning my next tattoo. :)

C&D Book Update #4

HOW I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WRITING!

I've been spending what time I could spare fleshing out chapters 57+. I ended up having to add a 700-words-long chapter as chapter 58 due to some emotional milestones that didn't feel earned enough. And I ended up with the best lines in the whole book? Somehow? I had to write it like, 3 times. First it was all about a robbery, then I just didn't want to write anything on robbery anymore, then I started writing a whole different chapter. A bit difficult, but I managed.

Now I'm having a blast with chapter 59. It was mostly written already (I said that I finished the first draft in another update), but I had so much fun adding these little silly details. I still need to change two flirty lines that aren't strong enough... but that's what the 5th revision is, right? RIGHT???!!!!

I'm still working on chapter 59, and I think I can manage 40 too today. Only, 40 is soooo complex (on a planning perspective) I don't know how long it will take.

Well, sometimes I surprise myself and it takes like, 5 hours.

Other times, 5 days.

Just normal F me.

My fav anime

Saint Seiya (original series + Hades; boring to most, precious to me)

Moriarty the Patriot (150%)

D.Gray-Man (I love Noahs and the biblical themes)

Dan Dan Dan (funny and chaotic, just how I like it most)

Steins;Gate (the original one. Mindblowing)

Fullmetal Alchemist (crazy, I love both adaptations)

Planet Survival (super wholesome, best ending)

Tokyo Ghoul (I know, the manga is better, but whatever)

Madoka Magica (oh the feels)

Cherry Magic (wholesome)

Code Geass (+)

Darker than Black (I loved the season with the sniper girl!!! One of the best characters and openings ever)

Yu-Gi-Oh (the last season is the best)

Psycho-Pass (interesting)

The next animes I want to watch:

Bungo Stray Dogs

Heaven Official's Blessing

Magi

Animes I hated but had amazing osts:

Monochrome Factor

Vampire Knight

The best movies I ever saw in theaters were Hobbit 1 and 2. I couldn't watch the final movie because... well... spoilers. I had already read the book and I hated the ending...

Best songs ever: I See Fire and Misty Mountains. I got so many chills when listening to them the first time. Priceless

C&D Book Update #3

I finally finished the first draft!

The final chapters aren't that good yet, or fleshed out (at all), but they are finished!

I knew I could do this before September. I knew it!

Now I'm going back to chapter 57 to flesh it out a bit, then I'll flesh out the last chapters, then I'll go over the whole book and fix a ton of mistakes/bad research/etc. (most chapters are red marked by now, 2 chapters need a whole rewrite...) and THEN I'll do the last reading. And it'll be ready! <3

I also commissioned an artist to do a chibi version of the C&D couple and it looks soooo cute!! i'm so excited to reveal it all soon!!

Expelled from Word, he is now trying to contact you through other programs...

Martin is famous for his “gardening” approach to plot development. He doesn’t want to plot things out and build a fixed plot, he wants to imagine what all the characters are getting up to and let all of that together grow into something organically. It’s a nice sentiment, it just doesn’t work well with what he was doing.

Source: here

Really interesting. I never thought about what I did was "gardening". Fascinating. I think the difference is, I do know exactly how I want to end, I do have strong ideas on the vibe and what happens. But I need time figuring out the in-betweens; how each character will act and the repercussions.

That's why I can spend years upon years planning a book. The planning bit is the most important part...

Fav bands/singers

6arelyhuman

Three Days Grace

My Darkest Days

Matt Walst

Lady Gaga

Sid Dorey

Marina

Halsey

Inuday

My first completed book

I've been writing since I was 6 years old. As in, actually trying to finish a book.

I never could.

Until one day, years ago, I finished one.

It was all about old Brazilian tales. Awesome stuff, right?

Well, I managed to make the worst job possible ever uper duper no.

It taught me ~so much~

And it made me see that your first book, most of the time, really will be trash.

If yours wasn't, more power to you. But mine certainly was

Maybe one day I'll go over it again and rewrite every little damn thing.

But the overall lesson?

I suck at writing in Portuguese.

My other language, Spanish, well... a complete disaster (don't even ask).

And English? Ok, I can have bad wording and a ton of mistakes and such, but I do find it way more fun to write. I think it does have something to do with the fact that I've been using more English than any other language since 2011, I think. As in, I didn't read a single fiction book (for leisure) in another language since 2010.

(I admit I struggle to read good fiction books in Portuguese now.)

What does that make me? A language nomad? A freak accident? Both of those things?

SoS Trilogy Update #1

I've been working on this for months.

Seeing as I'm reaching the end of my CD Original Book, I've been dabbling even more in my SoS Trilogy.

It's a difficult project. I need to have all three books outlined first, which will probably take 2025, 2026 AND 2027 to do. I'll probably write the first book in 2027...

(As for the TCIK book, it should be launched 2026 I think...)

But anyway, the reason I'm writing this is to say... I legit went through my main character in SoS's playlist and thought, 'not enough Lady Gaga'. Now I'm trying to find more of her songs to add. Most don't fit...

Well, I need to try anyway.

TCIK Original Book Update #7

FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY

MY FIRST BREAKTHROUGH

IF I SOUND CRAZY, IT'S BECAUSE I AM!

finally

finally

I came across this old animation I first saw when I was like 12? And it sparked so many ideas! I totally wasn't prepared for it, and it opened my eyes!!

I still have like, to work on 70% of the book (that's still a mystery to me), but the dots are doting now. The lines are lining. The floor is flooring. Things are feeling alive, and I feel like I understand the theme of the fic for the first time. The feelings. The vibe.

I got the main character's backbone yesterday, and now a specific scene's vibe (and some repercussions for the entire fic...)

I'm so happy

TCIK Original Book Update #6

I talked to a friend today and it REALLY helped.

We spent like half an hour discussing the plot and I ended up deciding on a few things after our conversation. Also, she made a curious request: that I repeat a phrase or an emotion in certain specific moments (I can't talk about what those moments are, big spoiler...). I think it made me stumble into some hidden treasure, but what this treasure is, I'm yet to know...

I'm old af

I was just remembering 'the old days'. 'My days'.

I'm so oooooooooooooooold.

Me, my parents and a cheap car.

No air conditioning, the warmest summer ever known.

Beatles rocking through the radio nonstop.

Beetles rocking through the windshield with a ton of their insect friends as well. (For some reason, those insects just disappeared nowadays...)

Coming back home to... sit down and read a book? Cuz no internet, babe. Not even a mp3 player at the time.

(I confess, I'd just stare at the ceiling, wishing it'd swallow me whole.)

Tumblr is god-given, I'm telling ya.

TCIK Original Book Update #5

Hmmm. Yeah. Procrastinating. You got it.

But I AM writing! Just not in the right doc. I ended up having this idea-like always-and this idea now has 55-songs in its own playlist and a few scenes badly written. But damn, aren't they funny! I've never written scenes as hilarious as these before, in my life.

I think this specific book (not the one I've been working on before, which will come around August 2025) will come around mid 2026, perhaps. Or early 2027. Idk. I want to make it a long book, full of banter and ridiculous situations, so it will be harder to write than an angst book (at least that's how it works for me).

Anyway, the other book? The August 2025 one? Yeah, it's in what I call, "de molho". Which translates as "leaving it soaking", kinda, which means, yeah you got it you smart pie, I'm procrastinating. Out of ideas. Out of the will to write anything down. Hating it, even. But that's how it always goes. Give it a week or two, or maybe ten years, and I'm back to it again just fine.

All in all, wish me luck. Or don't wish me anything. Or wish me evil, and I'll just laugh. Below my blankets.

xoxo

*holding clipboard* hm…. *kisses your cheek* interestning… *writes down results on clipboard but the results are a drawing of us holding hands*

Perfect!!

Full offense but your writing style is for you and nobody else. Use the words you want to use; play with language, experiment, use said, use adverbs, use “unrealistic” writing patterns, slap words you don’t even know are words on the page. Language is a sandbox and you, as the author, are at liberty to shape it however you wish. Build castles. Build a hovel. Build a mountain on a mountain or make a tiny cottage on a hill. Whatever it is you want to do. Write.

Today I got 200 words written down.

And they were ~the best words~ I've written so far.

(The scene isn't even ready...)

~just a little patience~

I knew this fic would take time, and it'd probably only be ready near August, but it always surprises me... the amount of work one actually has to do to write like, 100.000 words??

I love every damn second of it, anyway.

Ok just figured it out: I'm hearing Tchaikovsky from now on

Omg I'm here wanting to cry. Why? Because I'm hearing lo-fi & eating nutella. Somehow that's cry-inducing to me now.

And you can't even say that it must be 'that time of the month' cuz I'm not a woman, technically. What's wrong with me. WHY does lo-fi makes me want to cry. What do I even hear if not lo-fi to relax?? I tried 3daysgrace, for hours, then Bullet for my Valentine, then back to 3daysgrace, now I got no idea what to listen to. Also, I have to work, so I can't just go home and bury myself in a tower of blankets like I'm rebuilding Babel.

Never gonna hear lo-fi again.

(Make a bet on how long it takes for me to listen to it again.)