Https://archiveofourown.org/works/53718373

Post hush 2/ Batman 159

Bruce:

Dick:…

Bruce:

Dick:

Bruce:

Dick:

Bruce:

Dick: I’m not mad

Bruce: you punched a hole through the concrete support beam Dick I think your ly-

Dick: SHUT UP FOR ONE SECOND

Bruce:

Dick: I’m not mad

Dick: but can you explain to me, your son -if that MEANS anything anymore- why the fuck

Dick: you thought it was okay to SHOOT MY BROTHER IN THE FACE

Bruce: it was necessary to discover his id-

Dick: STOP TALKING.

Bruce: you asked me to explai-

Dick: THATS BEFORE I REALIZED YOU WERE BEING FUCKING STUPID

Dick pinching the bridge of his nose: okay let me phrase it this way. Let’s say it wasn’t Jason behind the mask

Bruce: it was tho

Dick: let’s imagine an alternate reality where Jason doesn’t raise my blood pressure

Dick: and let’s say you shot this secret third person in the face, and it went through the helmet

Dick: and you ended up killing them

Bruce: I wouldn’t have I analyzed the makeup of the mask and extrapolated the amount of force required to shatter it vs go clean through it

Dick: yeah except that wasn’t your gun

Bruce: I knew the make

Dick: and I can count 60 rogues, mercs and assassins who match jays build and customize their weaponry in ways we can’t notice until they fire

Bruce: … I don’t see the issue here

Dick: you don’t see the issue in shooting my brother in the face with a fucking gun? To protect I don’t even know who?

Bruce: …

Dick: …… Bruce

Bruce: yes dick

Dick: don’t lowercase my name asshole, but you… wouldn’t right?

Bruce: wouldn’t what

Dick: no?… no that’s crazy? I’m being crazy (crazy I was crazy once) you wouldn’t help the joker in our damn cave. You wouldn’t BRING THE JOKER to our damn cave and get pissy that Jason was angry about that

Bruce:…

Dick: you’re the world’s greatest detective you couldn’t figure out somewhere else to take care of the PSYCHO?? Or better yet??? LET THE BASTARD DIE

Bruce: my job is to save people

Dick: unless it’s Jason apparently. No it’s fine if HE gets blown up.

Dick: also SINCE WHEN IS JOKER PEOPLE??? JASON IS BARELY A PERSON IN YOUR EYES?

Bruce: Nightwing you’re being emotional-

Dick: don’t try to switch personas with me asshole this is Bruce and Dick fighting over the fact that you seriously need to stop doing this shit to Jason before you drive him off a ledge

Bruce: Jason is fine

Dick: dude.. fine i defended you when you slit his throat bc my city was a pile of radioactive waste. Sure okay? Penguin dead? And you beating him into the ground I minded my damn business

Dick: the FUCKINF demon bat possession or whatever the fuck happened during Gotham war Tim pulled me off your ass and made sure I didn’t add your death to my conscience

Dick: don’t even play that THIS WAS A REASONABLE AND NORMAL PERSON THING BRUCE

Since the comics won’t do it does anyone have proper dick and Kori fics. Not dick and Jay and also star is there. Not outsiders Kori. Not past Kori/dick

Just good old fashion nightstar, robstar, nightfire

Cutesy get back together content? Rekindled passion? The never broke up? Dealers choice but please I’m starved

imagine being so good at acting like everything is fine even the fandom thinks you are mentally stable ( dick grayson obviously)

You know that TikTok trend like POV: this is your emergency contact.

Imagine being part of a superhero team and your hyper competent team leaders emergency contact is one (1) very flippy acrobat who is 100% here and present in the moment and not being weighed down by the guilt of a thousand deaths. Nor is he seeing any of these shadowy corpses while assisting your team.

No he’s far far too stable for that?

Anyway here’s my list of my favorite unhinged Grayson moments (without panels tho if anyone asks I can prolly track em down)

-Dick licking a random substance of the ground and then going. Yup tastes like heroin

- pulling a gun on Roy Harper (outsiders divorced husbands arc)

- that fight between him and deathstroke

-that other fight between him and deathstroke

- teen titans robin nonsense

- secrets and masks hallucinajaybin being a shadowy amalgamation of ????

- Tim: please be Robin

Dick: how about uno fucking reverse

- literally like 80% of the Grayson Run (specifically any scene with tiger or midniter)

- the desert scene is rated separately bc it’s more insane on its own wdym you walked through a desert for like fuck knows how many days without food or water RICHARD

-bleeding himself to death near radioactive material bc your job is martyr

-bleeding himself to death for his not dad (it’s 100% his dad)

- is it mean to include that ooc time in Batman and Harley Quinn where she ties him up and it’s HEAVILY implied they fucked? Welp I’m including it anyway

- KEEPING THR DISCOWINY COSTUME AFTER MIRAGE??? RICHARD YOU HAVE MONEY USE IT

- young justice robins/nightwings laugh deserves its own mention

-threatening his dad with the promise of adopting his brother

There are more that I am forgetting I am sure. But in summary I love him he’s my son. The fact that he has this much responsibility bc he’s the best equipped worries me about the other characters mental stability

Okay but I have questions?

Is it Arabic coffee or Turkish coffee?

And if it’s Arabic coffee with or without cardamom???

Talia is definitely a Turkish coffee person she also does the thing where she flips it over, swirls it and reads the meaning.

I think Ras would be an Arabic coffee drinker but he’s one of the puritans who likes his coffee light, kinda how they serve it in Saudi. Like the pale green one with a small plate of dates.

But there’s one thing I think is really funny

Listen Arabs don’t… really drink coffee alone in a full house? It’s just not really done.

You also don’t drink coffee quickly

Coffee is a period of time where you sit down and get all the gossip from your family members if you’re a matriarch (I’m talking elopements, marriages, divorces, cheating scandals with the Al ghuls probably all of that + murders, assassination attempts and or plans etc)

Can you imagine Damian moving to the manor and seeing Alfred the eldest member of the household serving people tea and then …. Leaving?

Or taking his tea by himself for a well earned break?

Personally if I was 10? It would freak me the hell out if my grandma was sitting alone having her coffee when my mom and various aunts and uncles were in the house.

Or my GREAT grandma omg no that’s just eerie

He’d be so confused?? Like wtf are you doing?? Or like how people have coffee with breakfast here instead of after??? Like you don’t move to the sitting room and have coffee with tiny bite sized desserts or dates? Are you okay? Why are you having a pot of coffee with your oatmeal?

In my Arab region (I can't speak for the others, but I'm pretty sure they have similar things. Add your stuff if you do!) Coffee time is kind of sacred and is tightly regulated with heavy traditional rules. Especially so for the male populace.

Coffee makes the man! (Literally, I can't stress this enough)

Men and women alike are trained from a very young age on how to make and serve their coffee. A coffee with a good colour is a bright sign for your guests, and the way you serve is very telling of you.

Doors are ALWAYS open for guests, and HUGE halls are prepared to accommodate them (they can reach hundreds, depending on your dad's popularity). A household's head is a very blessed man when he has children/grandchildren because he can brag about them by showing their serving skills off. Those children will be scrutinised and judged according to their coffee serving manners. It's a very integral part of a charming character's traits for us. So, parents, especially fathers, are very strict about this.

Aside from guests, families have daily coffee time for themselves, too! It's very respectful to serve your mom and dad coffee. So it's expected from you.

Considering Ra's personality, serving him coffee as a grandson would be a nightmare.

Imagine Damian refilling the finjaan again and again in front of an elegantly sitting Ra's until he gets it right? Imagine him waiting (while standing, maybe for an hour or so) for Ra's to finish his finjaan so he can refill it again? Imagine how LIVID Ra's would be when Damian accidentally fills the finjaan to the top (a message that says, are you satisfied, yet? Get out! In my region) imagine Ra's asking Damian to serve coffee for his villain allies?!! Arabs and non?? And imagine people getting to know and hear about him from his coffee serving, like a good Arab son, before they know him from his sword?

Also, when he finally lives in the manor and sunset arrives and Batman is sitting by the batcomputer, deeply focused, and then is surprised by a finjaan presented to him because it's coffee time?

Damian would be very confident and proud of his coffee making and serving skills he would expect from Bruce nothing but sipping and asking for a refill, because his father should know his manners.

Bruce would know nothing about this but would, of course, sip (not drink! Drinking bad!!!) without question, and will continue to accept and sip every. Single. Day before patrol without knowing what is happening but going along with it because he's pretty sure this is Damian's way of bonding.

Which is not really true because Damian is only performing his duty as a son. He never really understood the core meaning behind this tradition because for a long time now, the art of Arabian Coffee was only a skill that was expected from him and a part of showing good grace. But as days pass and the number of people being served coffee increases and coffee time becomes a routine before each patrol for the whole family, when dates and snacks and small talk and occasional laughter join in, the very meaning behind this tradition clicks with him, and he serves it with a smile.

Dick ‘has been a barista like 90 times over 50 years of comics Grayson’ can absolutely prepare whatever drink you want him too. He can also guess/ judge what your go to order is.

With the bats

He can guess what WILL be there favorite even if they’ve never tried it before

——————

Bruce on 13 mins of sleep fucking exhausted but even Alfred isn’t giving him shit bc they HAVE TO crack this case: hrn

Dick plopping a take away coffee cup in front of him: DRINK

Bruce goes through a quick is this my son or a shapeshifter, mind control, demon situation before deciding fuck it we ball and taking a sip: this… tastes different

Dick: yeah

Bruce ‘actual freak who grumbles when coffee isn’t bitter enough’ Wayne: this is good

Dick: yeah it’s a red eye

Bruce: hrn

Dick: yeah no problem B

——————

Jay (just got done fighting aliens and needs to get back to whatever he was doing before) : get me a Drink as black as my soul

Dick: sure

Dick brings back the drink from the kitchen

Dick: strawberry iced matcha with oat milk right here for you

Jay: what the fuck Goldie

Dick: I saw you sobbing at the notebook a week ago don’t play tough with me and don’t fucking lie we both know you like tea more.

Jay sputtering: Don’t PLAY TOUGH? BROTHER I PUT A BUNCH OF HEADS A BAG AND MADE THE UNDERWORLD INTO MY BITCH

Dick: yes yes Jay now go drink your tea and run along

(It is the best fucking thing he’s ever tried, bought a matcha making kit as soon as he got him, has denied it ever since but Dick doesn’t buy it and keeps making him the drink)

—————-

Tim:

Dick:

Tim:

Dick:

Tim:

Dick: you’re a heathen

Tim: proudly

Dick: fine take the monster and go OH MY GOD

————————

Steph wincing at the taste of a latte: there’s something seriously wrong with this place, no matter how much sugar I add it’s just bitter

Dick: yeah Steph it’s bc they burn the beans to get more use of em

Dick: you could add all the cream and milk you want it’s not gonna do shit

Steph: ugh this is the only coffee spot on my campus in so screwed

Dick pulling out a takeaway coffee cup: don’t worry I brought you some from home

Steph: Jesus fuck this is delicious

Dick: upside down sweet almond latte with caramel and double espresso

Steph: should’ve married into the family with Tim god damn

Dick: Cass is still an option

Steph: what

Dick: what

——————————-

Dick:

Duke:

Dick:

Duke:

Dick: you’re one of Tim’s heathens aren’t you

Duke: just because I like energy drinks more doesn’t mean I don’t LIKE coffee

Dick grumbling: should’ve left you with the cops

Duke: what was that? I didn’t hear you

Dick thrusting the coffee cup at him: just take it, end my suffering

Duke: oh damn that’s good… what is it

Dick:…. It’s Vietnamese style coffee

Duke: fuck I might I have to switch, Jesus that’s good

Dick vaguely smug: another victory

—————

Dick: hey Cass

Cass: busy… like you should be

Dick: yeah, yeah I have like 6 mins of free time left before I have to meet up with Robin (Tim) for an op

Dick: anyway i made you strawberry hot chocolate

Cass: this isn’t coffee

Dick: it has 180 milligrams of caffeine

Cass: how?

Dick: don’t ask difficult questions

Dick: where the hell did she go?

Dick: is this how everyone else feels about us?

——————

Damian: I want coffee

Dick: you’re an infant, no

Damian: IM 15 GRAYSON

Dick: a certifiable baby

Damian: I hate you

Dick: you would hate me more if you stunted your growth and ended up Tim sized

Tim: HEY!

Damian: this is true… apologies Richard

Dick Grayson:

*runs the titans*

*works for the league*

*has a day job*

*solo patrols bludhaven*

*solo patrols New York*

*on call 24/7 for regularly scheduled Gotham crisis(es)*

*training at least 40% of new gen heroes at any given moment*

*infiltrating the current annoying cult, corrupt gov, spy organization, company, mafia group, evil underground ancestral foundations of a city and random corrupt modeling industry*

*monitoring drug pedaling in 3 cities*

*emotionally regulating 80% of his family bc why would they do it themselves? Nah let’s just ruin relationships for fun -cough Bruce cough-*

* maintaining civilian cover*

*canonically does volunteer work*

I am beginning to think nightwing doesn’t have anger issues he’s just overstimulated bc wtf

Like Dick take a break what is this?

————

Dick currently working on infiltrating the mob, after 4 days of 6+ hour patrols bc bludhaven has no chill an Arkham breakout, a performance review at work that took too long, organizing a titans outer space mission, just got back from training Jon Kent: no one call me plz god no one call me I can’t do this I have so much work no one. Call me plz

*phone rings* -it’s tim

He could ignore it but last time he left Tim alone for a month the dumbass lost his spleen and decided a cowl was a fashion choice (equally bad in his opinion)

Dick picking up the phone with his non broken arm: yello

Tim: so I accidentally maybe got kidnapped and maybe also started a cult around the concept of Batman and I’m out of energy drinks. (All equally dire in tims opinion)

Dick popping 4 caffeine pills: shut up I’ll be there in 30 don’t DO ANYTHing.

—————

Jason: sooo I might be engaged to an alien princess

Dick about to pop a Xanax: tell me it’s Kori or at least in this galaxy

Jason: nope

Dick: …. Can it wait

Jason: she wants to eat me, their species is like a praying mantis knockoff but with space and mind control.

Dick: yeah okay give me an hour I’ll call raven

————

Damian: hello Richard

Dick: what did you do.

Damian: I have been kidnapped by my mother

Dick: again

Damian: I feel it would be redundant to say anything

Dick: …….. alright I’ll call the nearest flying hero be there in a bit… keep ur spine where it is Damian or I swear to god-

——————

Bruce: cult

Dick who just got done with an undercover mission: anddd?

Bruce: we need someone to infiltrate it

Dick: I swear to god I. will. hurt. you

Bruce: hnnnn

——-

Babs: I have… acquired a child

Dick who is fighting deathstroke : …okayyyy

Babs who is watching the fight: she’s a little bit … traumatized

Dick, dodging a katana: preaching to the choir

Babs: can you do your whole, human empathy and kindness tell me ur life story I have puppy dog eyes.

Dick: ….

Babs: you owe me

Dick: … one day I will delete all your numbers and disappear

Babs cheerfully: you know no matter where you go I can find you hunk wonder see you in 3 hours don’t die before then!

Listen my moms Muslim my dads Christian I was raised agnostic but still it doesn’t matter everyone can use the capitalist holiday to eat a fuck ton of food and day drink

Merry winter time

Yall I have like 40 wips rn and I need to finish one of them but I have indecision paralysis and am now just playing genshin impact instead of anything on my to do list.

Hey do you know a canon summary of Jason’s plotline/ development? Or if you don’t at least what you think his development is? I saw your Damian and Jason being league bros rant and I really liked it. Idk shit about jack that’s canon I just see family vibes in fanfic and my trauma says awooga

Hi hi

Yes yes

Okay so my big issue with the league bros Jay and Dami brotherisms

Is that yes Jaybin was a sweetie (I wouldn’t say he wasn’t reckless or that he was the kindest or nicest Robin bc I think that’s a gross exaggeration but he was a sweetie)

But he just? Wasn’t that? When he came back? He was rightfully angry and violent. He gave into the violent tendencies he had as Robin (which unpopular opinion I think were COMPLETELY JUSTIFIED BTW)

but like? Jay had a bat habit of murdering all his teachers when they were done with him

He killed his goons and low level players in his race to take over the Gotham underbelly and like? Idk he just wasn’t? The current red hood or the past Robin.

Like since I am a dick Grayson stan account I’ll use them to demonstrate.

But Jay and Dicks relationship is awful when he first comes back

-he steals dicks nightwing suit and kills people in it ruining dicks standing and making him a target for more anti-hero ‘vigilantes should be killed’ stuff that was happening at the time

- he killed like 100 people in black gate bc he was like ‘well i wanna kill criminals and here i am surrounded by criminals whatever shall i do’

- then there’s all the WEIRD ASS STUFF he did to Dick and Damian when they were Batman and Robin (stripping them naked and trying to reveal them that way to the world??)

Anyway Jay was a fucking VILLAIN

And then after all this, the reboot happened, they gave Jason a collection of very fucked up and traumatized folks that he couldn’t just murder his way out of

And he like actually had to have dimension and he was moved from being imo one of the most interesting Batman/ batfam villains to being a pretty cool anti hero more in the line with batwoman or like the new Harley Quinn

But he didn’t start out that way

He was a murderer with sociopathic tendencies who remembered what it meant to give a fuck through a lot of shared trauma and experiences and now. His relationship with the bats (I’m talking specifically about the batlings rn like dick, Tim and Damian) is much better

Dick helps him clear his name when he’s accused of murder

Tim and him work together on cases

He’s trying to be there for Damian

And this whole dynamic gave me the ability to watch my precious baby boy beat the shit out of Bruce Wayne during Gotham war (I just love angry Grayson lemme live)

Right

But if you think for a SECOND THAT OG VILLAIN JAY TODD WOULD HAVE BEEN LET AROUND TALIAS BABY??

Not happening

Now a lot of people are gonna be like “oh you’re picking and choosing” or “oh you’re ignoring Talia’s characterization in morrisons and using jays” and yeah I think that Talia’s characterization in dicks Batman run was awful and while I think certain things Jason does in the comic he wouldn’t have done if written by someone else. It 100% is more fitting than the racist nonsense Talia Stan’s had to deal with. 

Anyway I think if you want sweet and fuck brotherisms/siblingisms/ other bat relationships (since you don’t read canon and some of these are lowkey ignored by the fanon i 100% you check out like any fanart/ fanfic of them)

Dick Grayson and any younger Robin is always adorable

Tim and Damian in Gotham war

Jay and Damian in the Robin run

Tim and Duke whenever they’re together

Tim, cass and Steph also have a very fun dynamic (the angst potential here goes crazy tho)

Jay and Dick as red hood and nightwing are very very fun

But also nightwing and Jaybin is fucking adorable (cue dick trying to take Jason Todd from Bruce like YOU FUCK UP IM ADOPTING HIM MYSELF)

Jay and babs (we ignore that one time they tried to make them date we IGNORE IT)

Outside of the Batfam batkid relationships are also so fluffy

Jay and bizzaro have a very cute relationship

Tim and the young justice team are fucking adorable esp him Cassie, Kon and Bart

Supersons can be read as platonic or romantic but they’re fucking adorable and I loved the supersons comic so so so much

Dick and the fab 5 trust me Dick and Donna sibling fluff hurts my teeth.

I personally hated the comic this happened in but if you’re not a big comic fan / you don’t care about pre crisis that Jay and Roy??? Adoptable

Anyway this is mainly based on my opinion I AM mainly a Nightwing reader so some of these things come from my Jay Todd Stan friends (cough cough cough you know who you are cough cough) so I’m sorry if I fucked up any details

I glow pink in the night in my room 💖 ID is in alt text!