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Dick ‘has been a barista like 90 times over 50 years of comics Grayson’ can absolutely prepare whatever drink you want him too. He can also guess/ judge what your go to order is.
With the bats
He can guess what WILL be there favorite even if they’ve never tried it before
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Bruce on 13 mins of sleep fucking exhausted but even Alfred isn’t giving him shit bc they HAVE TO crack this case: hrn
Dick plopping a take away coffee cup in front of him: DRINK
Bruce goes through a quick is this my son or a shapeshifter, mind control, demon situation before deciding fuck it we ball and taking a sip: this… tastes different
Dick: yeah
Bruce ‘actual freak who grumbles when coffee isn’t bitter enough’ Wayne: this is good
Dick: yeah it’s a red eye
Bruce: hrn
Dick: yeah no problem B
——————
Jay (just got done fighting aliens and needs to get back to whatever he was doing before) : get me a Drink as black as my soul
Dick: sure
Dick brings back the drink from the kitchen
Dick: strawberry iced matcha with oat milk right here for you
Jay: what the fuck Goldie
Dick: I saw you sobbing at the notebook a week ago don’t play tough with me and don’t fucking lie we both know you like tea more.
Jay sputtering: Don’t PLAY TOUGH? BROTHER I PUT A BUNCH OF HEADS A BAG AND MADE THE UNDERWORLD INTO MY BITCH
Dick: yes yes Jay now go drink your tea and run along
(It is the best fucking thing he’s ever tried, bought a matcha making kit as soon as he got him, has denied it ever since but Dick doesn’t buy it and keeps making him the drink)
—————-
Tim:
Dick:
Tim:
Dick:
Tim:
Dick: you’re a heathen
Tim: proudly
Dick: fine take the monster and go OH MY GOD
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Steph wincing at the taste of a latte: there’s something seriously wrong with this place, no matter how much sugar I add it’s just bitter
Dick: yeah Steph it’s bc they burn the beans to get more use of em
Dick: you could add all the cream and milk you want it’s not gonna do shit
Steph: ugh this is the only coffee spot on my campus in so screwed
Dick pulling out a takeaway coffee cup: don’t worry I brought you some from home
Steph: Jesus fuck this is delicious
Dick: upside down sweet almond latte with caramel and double espresso
Steph: should’ve married into the family with Tim god damn
Dick: Cass is still an option
Steph: what
Dick: what
——————————-
Dick:
Duke:
Dick:
Duke:
Dick: you’re one of Tim’s heathens aren’t you
Duke: just because I like energy drinks more doesn’t mean I don’t LIKE coffee
Dick grumbling: should’ve left you with the cops
Duke: what was that? I didn’t hear you
Dick thrusting the coffee cup at him: just take it, end my suffering
Duke: oh damn that’s good… what is it
Dick:…. It’s Vietnamese style coffee
Duke: fuck I might I have to switch, Jesus that’s good
Dick vaguely smug: another victory
—————
Dick: hey Cass
Cass: busy… like you should be
Dick: yeah, yeah I have like 6 mins of free time left before I have to meet up with Robin (Tim) for an op
Dick: anyway i made you strawberry hot chocolate
Cass: this isn’t coffee
Dick: it has 180 milligrams of caffeine
Cass: how?
Dick: don’t ask difficult questions
Dick: where the hell did she go?
Dick: is this how everyone else feels about us?
——————
Damian: I want coffee
Dick: you’re an infant, no
Damian: IM 15 GRAYSON
Dick: a certifiable baby
Damian: I hate you
Dick: you would hate me more if you stunted your growth and ended up Tim sized
Tim: HEY!
Damian: this is true… apologies Richard