Pleading For My Exam Tomorrow To Be Cancelled. Can't Study Jackshit Atp. My Mind Is Cooked.

Hermes having the twinkiest and sexiest designs in all epic fanarts and animatics is my personal holy moly. the mischief in the eyes?? the grin, the smirk??? the pose?? perfection.

Villainification of Perfectly Reasonable Anger; A Queer Feminist's Rant.

I am so tired of the entire 'man hating' feminist narrative and everything surrounding it, honestly. Yes, I am angry, Kevin. And this anger is here to stay. I am angry because you are quite literally making me debate if I deserve human rights or not? If my gender deserves healthcare or not?

I was watching a video (Essayist: Contrapoints) today where the woman perfectly articulates the immense emotional disdain and burden felt by the person of minority when they are asked to sit and 'debate'/explain why they deserve the bare freaking minimum, why their existence is valid, to their 'oppressor'-- and it almost made me tear up, because I have been put into that position to explain/debate so so many times. Topics like abortion, equal pay, LGBTQ rights-- that I have had to discuss 'rationally' with people in my life, because they simply have differing 'opinions'. I could never put that terrible feeling into words.

My dear, you are putting people in the position where their entire existence is put to question and placed up for debate like a simple small political issue-- and then you ask them to not be angry? When they argue back, why is it an 'overly emotional' and 'irrational' response? Is their pain, sadness and fury not warranted? Is it really an overreaction, or simply the most natural fucking response?

Is feeling hurt and angry because people who I am surrounded with, live with, frequent places with, talk daily with, cannot-- forget accepting my identity--even wrap their head around it sometimes, that unreasonable? I would say.. it isn't. So my rage is here to stay. And whilst it won't be directed at you, it will stay until we have fixed this accursed state of society.

Or nevermind that.

Which brings me to my second point.

The Romanticisation of Cold Logic and Neutral Stance

Why have we started romanticizing 'neutral cold hard logic' or 'detached stance' so much? A person who remains emotionless in the argument is not the winner. They simply do not have enough leverage in the topics being discussed (especially in cases of gender issues).

You say 'let's discuss why women shouldn't be allowed body autonomy' and you expect me to be like 'oh dear Jared, of course, let's have a calm and collected "debate" about our body rights. Do you want a tea while we discuss this little measly political issue?'

Jared, the only reason you aren't loosing your shit right now is because this thing won't ever affect you the way it does the person opposite to you. So don't ask me to 'chill out'.

We are angry and it's fucking valid.

Peace.

My latest hyperfixation? I am glad you asked. Its her. Its all her. [Jihyeon Jung- Surviving Romance]

I think this is why I love TOT dudes so much. They appear a trope but instead, are a full exploration and deconstruction of that trope.

From Artem appearing like a Cold Black Suit Boss trope but actually being just some dude who is actually really kind and awkward, learning to better socialise.

From Marius appearing like a Spoiled Rich Boy trope to actually being just someone struggling with ambition and responsibilities of his family name.

From Luke appearing like Childhood Friend Sunshine trope to being just someone struggling with being seriously ill, hypocritical due to his circumstances and seriously self destructive.

And.. well, it's a little hard to dissect Vyn to a trope but I think I have made my point already.

I just love these boys SO much and they all have so much love to give. So much kindness to show. So much affection to lay.

the take of "artem is so boring i don't get why people like him" always makes me laugh because like. .. wording aside, that's kinda the point! the appeal?!

he's introduced as this Serious and Cold suit wearing senior attorney of themis, which in most otome would indicate your typical Sexy and Smooth Daddy Dom. like. the first official art we see of him is him sweating and pulling his tie loose. upon global launch, advertisements for tot always included the first evo of his atmospherics ssr out of context.

but the twist is that he's just A Dude. he's respectful and gentle with rosa. he struggles to make friends because he's really socially awkward, takes his work seriously, and has a resting bitch face. he has a film review blog and likes to write fan scripts. his dad wasn't around much and rarely visits. despite appearances, he is deeply empathetic. he's surprisingly idealistic in regards to his work and the impact he wants to make on the city. he grew up not wanting to cause trouble for the adults in his life and as a result has great difficulty acknowledging what he's struggling with and expressing how he feels. he's easily flustered. he has been called out on his bullshit several times by rosa. his father figure is missing and he would do anything to save him. he is earnest in all he does. he is only friends with one person at work and that's celestine, the founder of the law firm and a family friend of his mother's. he's endearing!

despite the prestige and pedestals people place artem on, he is literally just A Dude and i think that's neat

This. because what do you mean you have watched that show I absolutely adore, you little fuck, don’t ruin it for me.

Absolutely nothing worse than finding out that you share interests with someone you hate. Has you thinking things like fuck you I'm better at enjoying star wars than you are

idk man, the fact that skip and loafer cares to differentiate between attraction to someone because you like them as person, attraction as friend and attraction as lover feels pretty neat ngl. tell me another manga which does that?? you cant.

unpopular opinion after finishing 2.5 books: shatter me was entirely ass and hot pile of garbage. The only good thing being aaron warner.

finished shatter me book 1 in half a day and my brother stared at me like i am a lunatic. My mother taunted me about studies. Fantastic.

Do you ever have a mood like "I will change the world, work my ass off" and next second you are like "its just 1 life, I should live it to fullest" and just proceed to watch TV for hours.

"Hope comes so naturally to you."

I read this line over and over again and sometimes I wish, it didn't. Sometimes, I wish hope didn't come easily to me. Sometimes, I just wish your comforting nihilism and words of how it shall all turn to dust either way appealed to me naturally.

I walk around this world and as I grow, I learn more of it. I see the destruction, the ruins we send our environment into, the hatred that spreads like a deadly poison, the bigotry, the complete breakdown this economy is having around us, the rich become richer and the poor only grow poorer. The divide, the ignorance, just the sheer amount of misery-- Misery. The common affliction to human condition.

And yet, I hate to think, 'Nothing will change'.

It would be *so* easy to. But I cannot.

Because I don't know what happens next-- then how can I say it never changes? Never will?

We don't know what will happen to everything.

What do we know?

That it will all eventually turn to dust.

Might as well turn to dust bearing some hope. Trying what little we can, bringing change in the little corner of the world. Maybe, just maybe the world will learn.

Because if it all ends, then what's the harm in hoping?

There are two ways you can live your life-- as the ignorant one. Ignorance is, in itself, bliss. To never let yourself be aware of the wretchedness of it all.

And as the aware one. To be aware, to be conscious, to be critical and slowly feel yourself become jaded. It is the more painful way.

But if history stands as evidence, it is the critical one who challenged the status quo. The critique who dares to hope for better has always been the one bringing change.

"I look around and see the misery. I look around and can't help but be aware of the futility. But I still clutch kindness closely to my heart. I still hold on to humanity and its dynamic ability to change. I still hope.

Because to hope, is to live.

And to live without hope, is to live a miserable life."

Re: Hope might come naturally to me, but even if it did not, even if it stopped being the case- I will still choose it.