What A Time To Be Alive

Discuss:

As someone so utterly oblivious literally the only romantic interaction I’ve ever noticed was after my mom had to point out a girl was flirting with me at pride after the fact, I’d have to go with oblivious dumbass. Plus I’m miles too blunt to ever pine in silence, one of the only perks of no filter is being totally able to flatly and passively inform someone I’m into them. I’ve never gotten a date from it, but despite what every show ever will tell you being up front is really good for keeping friendships

If you were in a fanfic, would you be the pining idiot or the oblivious dumbass?

post it in the tags!!

Free him

Broke: Gotham

Woke: Oswald is hitting on some asshole and it’s not going well for anyone

I cackled out loud at the last one

this is the stupidest thing i’ve ever made (insp) 

Ma’am do NOT tempt me🤭

Also that hc I sent I need a fic of that someone better write it

Yoo I can’t write smut. I mean I could, but it wouldn’t turn out well 😂

So if there are any sambucky smut writers looking for inspiration: https://biluata.tumblr.com/post/649332952720867328/bucky-100-has-a-cap-kink-and-he-100-says-lets

So y'all need to know about this fucking amazing show

Best show ever!

“You don’t know you’re bi, you’re just experimenting.”

And? What about it? Our heteronormative society didn’t teach me liking the same gender was even possible until I was 11, so if I wanna experiment fuckin let me. I’m a dumbass, you expect me to figure out my sexuality by just like... KNOWING??? Nah. I could be lending my (frankly incredible)intellect to the aliens plotting the systematic dismantling of the government or robbing a bank. Instead here I am eating pussy and sucking dick. I’m not saying I don’t do those things, but the double trouble jangling’s sure slowing it down.

Same

@cr333333p​:

“Are you a man or a woman?” “I’m a villain.” “What gender are you?” “Evil.” “Yeah, but what’s in your pants?” “Doom.”

x

FUCK

I don’t know if this has been done but I kept imagining a sort of Reincarnation!AU, like somehow the exhibits are all destroyed (killed, basically,) and Larry is absolutely heartbroken, because now he’s officially never going to see his friends again and it’s almost more than he can bear.

Then years later, he goes to get his mail and bumps into this blond guy with a Texan accent, who’s just moved into the apartment complex with his partner and their “kids,” (who are all cats.) Said partner then pokes his head out the door and informs Jedediah that a very important documentary about the Colosseum is about to start on TV, so move it cowboy. And Larry is dying to say something, because how is this possible?? But he just leaves them to it and Jedediah can’t help but feel like, “damn, that guy seemed familiar.”

When he takes a shortcut through the park, Larry passes an old couple sitting on a park bench, watching two kids play in the sandpit. The couple look just like Teddy and Sacagawea, and one of the kids calls Teddy “grandpa.” Larry nearly fucking cries because not only do reincarnated!Teddy and Wea have children but they have grandchildren too and wtf is going on?

A new cooking channel starts on TV and the hot-headed chef is none other than Attila. A travelling acting group puts on a performance of Hamlet and Lancelot plays the lead role. All these faces from the past just suddenly appear in Larry’s every day life and he doesn’t know how to feel, because none of them remember him or life in the museum. He almost drives himself crazy wondering how all the exhibits have become people and how they all have their own lives, even though it’s only been like three years.  

Then one day, as he’s walking home, he collides with a young man who (surprise surprise) is the spitting image of Ahkmenrah. He’s a university student who’s currently living with his older brother, but has so many plans for the future and after helping him pick up the books he dropped, Larry is dying to ask him if he remembers anything about being a dead Egyptian pharaoh with a magical tablet but decides not to because, you know, that’s weird. 

When he says goodbye and turns to go, he hears the young man say, “thanks Larry,” even though he never told him his name. 

(I made myself sad.)