✨ Currently Manifesting... ✨

“To change anything on the outside, you must become the change on the inside. How the changes will happen on the outside is not up to you. That is the job of the Universe. Your job is to radiate all good from the inside, and the outside circumstances will change to reflect the `all good´ inside you.”

- The Secret

TWICE x Cosmopolitan (2022)

the cure to self-sabotage is to anchor yourself to the universal truth that you are worth it. you are worth the effort. you are worth the difficulty, you are worth the time, you are worth the consideration. there is never a point in your life, in time itself, that you are not worth it. return to this truth when you feel yourself slipping. do not let it go.

Always Look Your Best:

Putting effort into your appearance is an act of self-love and discipline, you must be willing to put the effort into looking your best even when you don't feel like it. You are the only one responsible for the way in which you brand and present yourself. You have full control and agency over the persona you craft yourself to be.

Investing in your physical appearance and personal style will first make you feel more comfortable with your own persona and that will translate to higher self-esteem in the long run, and you should always strive to be the best representation you can of yourself for yourself first and foremost. Simultaneously, the world around you will always respond to the way in which you portray yourself, you will be treated according to how you treat yourself. If you show care and self-respect through the way in which you carry and present yourself (which can vary a lot depending on your personal style, taste, and personality), the world around you will naturally treat you as such.

You have only a few seconds to leave a lasting impression in people's minds, you don't know how something as simple as a short glance from someone to another person can potentially open the door for life-changing relationships and opportunities. Before we are known for our personality, intellect, and intrinsic qualities we are known for how we look and what our superficial personal branding exudes. If your goal is to transition into a specific kind of lifestyle make sure that you are embodying what someone who lives that kind of lifestyle looks like, dresses like, and behaves like.

Dream Girl Guide: How to Stay Productive

I saw this post on Twitter that said, "you're not overwhelmed, you're lazy and unmotivated." and to a certain extent, I agree. I definitely used to be a lazy, unmotivated person until I started working on my time management and organization skills. Here's how I did it:

Time Management

Get a planner

Everyone needs a planner; they are not just limited to students.

Find a planning system that is functional for you

I like to use a physical and digital planner:

A huge key to being consistently productive and organized is to make your task, especially reoccurring, as enjoyable and engaging as possible, which is why I like to use a physical planner; it allows me to be creative.

I like to keep it simple and just use stickers and washi tape; you want to make it enjoyable, but you don't want to take the focus away from the task at hand (planning)

The first photo is mine, but the other two are spreads by study_withashley that I've been using as inspo.

I use my digital planner for the "always on hand" convenience and the minimalistic layout. I use the apps Actions and Timepage; they are both a subscription ($2 a month), but it's super worth it!

Timepage is a calendar app with a monthly, weekly, and daily view; and Actions is for planning tasks (week view) and making lists.

You can change the background color and color-code your calendar and list. They have a 1-month free trial if you're interested!

How to efficiently plan

Monthly

♡ In your monthly and weekly view, write in any important dates that are set in stone (appointments, work and class schedule, due dates for assignments, tests/exams, birthdays, etc)

♡ Now that you have an idea of what your month will look like, on a notes section or sticky note, write down your own personal goals/action step, habits you want to practice or break, and unscheduled things you need to do. Don't overwhelm yourself - try to limit yourself to 5 in each category.

Daily

♡ Plan your days the night before - that way you have an idea of what your day is going to look like when you wake up and you can act accordingly. Don't plan days ahead; life is unpredictable.

♡ Schedule and prioritize 3 things every day; whether it's studying or having a self-care day.

Getting things done

♡ Set the tone - wake up early (at least by 9 am), fix your bed, and change out of your PJs.

♡ If you are going out, give yourself 1-2 hours to get ready. Avoid having to rush as much as possible.

♡ If you are staying home, have a designated space for getting work done - Some ideal spaces are at a desk, the library, Starbucks, and dining rooms. Do not work on a couch or bed.

♡ In addition, keep your space clean, and surround yourself with positivity and progressive things. Your environment affects your mood and productivity.

♡ If possible, stay ahead of your assignments to prevent stress and cramming.

♡ Like I said before, make your task as enjoyable as possible - Example: I don't like cleaning, so while I am, I watch vlogs of people being productive. It's motivating me while also distracting my brain from the fact that I'm cleaning. However, when it comes to more serious tasks, make them enjoyable, but not distracting.

♡ Use the Pomodoro technique to avoid burnout (no phone breaks!)

♡ Create routines - you don't literally have to follow a routine every day, but routines are good for days that you feel like you need some structure in your life.

♡ Stay emotionally aware and prioritize self-care - don't neglect yourself trying to get things done because, in the end, it will backfire. Every day take at least 5 minutes to do something that makes you feel good.

Thanks for reading

xoxo

Femme Fatale Playbook: How To Embody Queen Energy

Living in your queen energy requires you to stand in your power and look after yourself to the highest degree in every area of life. When tapping into this higher frequency, you realize that putting yourself first allows you to show up at your best – both for yourself and others. Here are some tips to embody the queen energy you’re meant to live in: 

Put Yourself First: Remember – your self-perception becomes your public image. You need to believe in yourself before others will. Believe that you’re worthy of living your dream life which includes achieving your loftiest goals and indulging your deepest desires. Reframe any resistance. Identify as someone who lives a life of abundance where all of your manifestations enter into your orbit with ease. 

Be Honest With Who You Want To Be: Sit down with yourself (and some writing utensils – whether it’s pen and paper or a keyboard) and journal to describe your ideal self. Don’t hold back. Indulge in your wildest dreams, goals, and fantasies. Become conscious of any limiting beliefs that come to mind as you write out these aspirations. Jot them down – they’ll give you some insight into what’s holding you back, so you can bridge the gap between who you show up as today and who you’re going to be once you put in the inner work. 

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries: Figure out what matters most to you in life. What activities, topics, aesthetics, art, clothing, hobbies, sounds, movements, books, television shows, movies, songs, and types of conversations most light you up inside? Here are some resources to guide your self-discovery journey HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality: I have more tips on building your personal brand, creating your persona (or ‘Dream Girl archetype’), and an ultimate Femme Fatale playbook linked HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Prioritize All Aspects of Your Health: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Sexual, Spiritual. Celebrate your needs – they make you human. Eat a healthful, plant-based diet, exercise and walk daily, meditate, read at least 10 pages a day, journal, make to-do lists, declutter your space, self-pleasure, recite your affirmations, lean into shadow and mirror work, create morning and nighttime routines. Feeling in alignment is essential to allowing your magnetic aura to shine through. Find all of my tips to cultivate self-regard in every area of life HERE.

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset: Designing the life of your dreams is an inevitable aspect of living in your queen energy. Stay informed, read books and articles on your industry, interests, current events, cultural happenings, history, and any other topic that brings you joy or you would find intriguing if someone brought up the subject at a dinner party. Mastering an evergreen skillset is essential for succeeding in your career or building a business. Living in your queen energy means living in abundance. While queen energy is a mindset, it is impossible to fully live in this dream reality without having passions and your finances in order. Start with my entire Femme Fatale booklist HERE and guide to building your dream career HERE.

Learn The Art of Detachment: Acknowledge what's out of your control. Living in your queen energy means you understand that it's important to work your hardest and smartest to determine the outcome of anything you can control. Otherwise, you have to let it go – people, professional opportunities, possessions. Projection, misalignment, or an undesirable fit does not deter you from striving toward your goals and relishing in satisfaction. Others' contempt and rejection serve as a cue for self-reflection and redirection.

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless: Do as you please, but keep your business (or pleasure) to yourself. Privacy is peace, power, bliss, and radiates quiet confidence – the greatest telltale sign that someone is living in her queen energy. Learn to hold your own. You will be guaranteed to earn respect within seconds of gracing anyone's presence.

Maintain Proper Posture: Shoulder back, chest open, back straight. Don’t be shy about taking up space. 

Accept Compliments With Grace: A smile and ‘thank you’ pairing is the most confident and elegant response. Some more confidence and social skill tips are linked HERE and HERE.

Live Unapologetically While Displaying Radical Empathy: Uphold your boundaries. Live your truth. Never beg or settle for less.

playlists for angelic moods~

you feel sensual and are ready to rejuvenate - you step into your clawfoot bathtub that’s full of rose petals, lavender oil, and pink salt

you’re wandering Paris - the sky looks like cotton candy, the Eiffel Tower is starting to twinkle, and there’s a fresh raspberry macaron in your hand

you’ve stumbled upon a fairy garden - the fairies whisper sweet compliments into your ears and sprinkle their dust atop your hair

there’s an extravagant ball tonight - you’re a princess, dressed in a beautiful gown and delicate tiara, and have just been asked to dance

you’re walking in New York City - you’re wearing your favorite silk dress and heels, lightly buzzed on rosé, hailing a taxi for a night out

it’s the early 2000s - you’re in your bedroom with your best friends, gossiping about your crush and wearing baby pink Juicy Couture pants

the afternoon is hazy - you’re having a picnic with your lover on a soft blanket, surrounded by wildflowers, the air is full of pink lemonade and kisses

the year is 1946 - your pearl necklace decorates your neck, everything is in black and white, live jazz softly serenades your ears as you make unexpected eye contact with an attractive stranger

💓🌕💓🌕💓🌕💓🌕💓🌕💓

The moon never stopped believing in you, She is always sending Her energies to you, She gives you the chance to reset at the end of the day, because She knows your potential is unlimited. She never gives up on you— She just hopes you never give up on yourself. ✨✨✨

Your average woman spends....

7 hours a day on her cellphone

49 hours a week,

210 a month,

2520 per year,

And finally, 25200 per decade. That's 2.9 years of her life spent on Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube, et cetera, doing useless activities that she'll not even remember, out of 10 YEARS of her life.

Even dedicating one third of that total time spent on screens on activities that provide an actual feeling of furfillement would reveal itself to be incredibly more fruitful.

We're assisting to a massive collective time sinking right now, and it should worry every single one of us. Even you, dear reader.

Your average woman is putting off excercise, skipping cooking healthy meals and going for the junkfood, avoiding studying new things that will enrich her life by going on Instagram Reels, odds she's skipping socialization opportunities with family or friends, she's probably missing out on activities because she's being overwelmed by the SELF-CAUSED lack of TIME. Your average woman is very likely to report lack of focus and feeling less productive than she feels she could be. She's also likely to report having mental health issues, from anxiety to depression, compulsion or apathy, or general lack of energy even.

Those two different issues, time wasting and lack of satisfaction with one's life, are absolutely linked.

And in my honest opinion, dedicating maybe one hour or two per day to reading, self-improvement, journaling, meditation, excercise, actual in-person socialization, and so on is going to help a LOT those issues.

Your average woman is actually simply NOT doing any of that.

And you probably deduced that being average isn't a great thing in that case.

You owe yourself your own happiness and furfillement. You owe yourself time to yourself.

You owe yourself an excellent focus, you owe yourself accomplishment and success.

You know how to do it. Eliminate anything that's on the way. Uninstall Tumblr and Pinterest and Tiktok and Facebook and Twitter and... You get it. You're way more likely to WASTE your precious time and STEAL yourself from great opportunities because you dead-scrolled.

Then, with the remaining apps, electronics, etc, severely declutter their use down to what you DO actually appreciate, to what you consider important.

Technology offers great benefits but it did stole our collective time. It made us insolated from each other, it made us hyperfocused on the fake PLEASURE that electronic device "interactions" offers, and made us skip the ACTUAL PLEASURE that life offers us.

I am not writing this to be angry at YOU in particular, I am personally pretty angry at the WHOLE situation that led us to that. And I personally feel pretty helpless facing this whole situation, people are aware of this themselves but they don't really realize how bad it actually is.