Fixing Thieves In Time Penelope

Fixing Thieves in Time Penelope

Thieves in Time was a pretty good game overall, but I am STILL pissed about what they did to Penelope. ‘She thinks Sly is a bad influence’ like excuse me? Even if that made any kind of sense (it doesn’t), am I the only one who remembers that she had a bit of a crush on Sly when she first joined the Cooper Gang? And suddenly her inventions are awful, even though they recruited her because she was as good if not better than Bentley? I call bullshit, fuck you very much.

I’ve come up with three alternate ways they could have done Penelope’s story that actually make sense and don’t feel out of character:

Option 1 Mind Control: Le Paradox has Miss Decibel hypnotize Penelope to make her give him the designs for the time machine. He decides to keep Penelope on-hand to maintain his blimp, and to serve as a hostage should the Cooper Gang uncover his plans and try to stop him. Upon their arrival in England, Sly and the Gang immediately learn that Penelope is working for Le Paradox and are devastated. During a recon mission, Sly and Bentley discover devices similar to Miss Decibel’s record players, which keep Penelope hypnotized. Bentley immediately begins drawing up plans to destroy the devices and free Penelope. The boss fight against her still happens, but with the plan being to destroy the hypnotic devices keeping Penelope under Decibel’s control. The Cooper Gang succeeds and Penelope is freed, reuniting with Bentley and rejoining the Gang for the rest of the game.

Option 2 Double Agent: Penelope catches wind of someone trying to get their hands on the designs for the time machine, and does a little investigating on her own. This leads her to Le Paradox, who offers her a position working for him. Recognizing the threat Le Paradox’s plan poses to her friends and boyfriend, Penelope agrees, and she sabotages his plans and tech every chance she gets. Throughout the game, she leaves clues for the Cooper Gang to find (such as the sheriff’s badge), trusting them to thwart Le Paradox’s operations. She’s ordered to go to England to work alongside the Black Knight, who is revealed to be Raleigh from the first game (Le Paradox arranged his escape from prison in exchange for a chance at revenge on Cooper and the Gang). In the final fight, Penelope reaffirms her allegiance to Bentley and the Cooper Gang, and she and Bentley work together to dismantle the giant robot, allowing Sly to land the final blow to take down Raleigh. As in Option 1, Penelope and Bentley reunite, and Penelope rejoins the Gang for the rest of the game.

Option 3 Dangerous Threats: Le Paradox threatens to erase Bentley from history unless Penelope gives up the designs for the time machine to save him. Terrified of losing her true love, Penelope reluctantly agrees, and Le Paradox keeps her close by as a hostage and to prevent her from tipping off Bentley and the Gang. She is sent to Medieval England and is kept prisoner in the castle by the Black Knight (who could be Raleigh as in Option 2, or a new character) and is forced to design and build the mechanical guards for him. Once in England, Sly discovers Penelope’s location and sneaks into the castle to confront her. When she reveals Le Paradox’s threats, Sly reassures her that together they can keep Bentley safe, and convinces her to escape with him and return to the Gang. Penelope and Bentley reunite at the hideout, and she gives the Gang useful information about the Black Knight’s plans and weaknesses. During the boss fight, Penelope again comes through for her friends by being the one to finish off the Black Knight and reveal the next time period they need to travel to.

In all three versions, Penelope and Bentley both serve as tech experts during the final confrontation with Le Paradox, making use of their combined talents to help achieve victory (while also being totally adorable together: finishing each other’s sentences, hugging and holding hands, kissing, all of it).