Willing Sacrifice~

What is a Rapier?

A Rapier is a one-handed, thrust-centric sword common to the Renaissance. The word first begins to be used in France in the late 15th century, referring to swords as an “Epée Rapiere,” and it continues to see common use into the mid 17th century, and even into the 18th century in countries such as Spain.

Common sub-types of Rapier include the swept hilt,

cup hilt,

pappenheimer,

and ring hilt (also called a seven ring, or some variation thereupon,)

and the rapier is likely the weapon which has the most manuals written on its use. Contrary to popular belief, Rapiers are not particularly light swords, sometimes weighing as much as longswords, up to 5 lbs/2.25 kg.

-mod Armet

something I find kinda interesting about radfems is that because they believe that womanhood is characterized by universal experiences of trauma and oppression, and because they believe that only they and people who agree with them correctly understand the nature of this oppression, they end up sounding like they believe that the only reason women would like things that they think are bad is if they're somehow being tricked into liking it

does a woman like wearing makeup or revealing clothes? patriarchal brainwashing. a cis woman who identifies as a lesbian dating a trans woman with a penis? she's doing it out of guilt or pity, or she was pressured into it. afab people coming out as non-binary or trans men? that's just internalized misogyny making them want to escape womanhood. hijabi women keeping their heads covered and dressing modestly? obviously they've been pressured into it by their oppressive islamic upbringing. women who are into kink, particularly if they're submissive? abuse victims who don't realize their male partners are taking advantage of them

women aren't allowed to like things under radical feminism. every aspect of a woman's life is either a political statement or a decision made under duress. women have free will and agency unless they disagree with me, in which case they're helpless victims who can't recognize how oppressed they truly are.

don't get me wrong, I think it's worth examining why you enjoy doing the things you're doing. the modern state of corporatized pop-feminism has found a way to frame nearly every act, regardless of how harmful to one's self or others, as feminist, and that's a trap that you certainly don't want to fall into. but the vision of womanhood that radfems paint is so bleak and joyless that it can never adequately act as an answer to that problem

Etudier

Avant, étudier c’était pour faire briller des étoiles dans les yeux des adultes. C’était pour faire croire que j’étais quelqu’un de bien, de digne d’intérêt. C’était facile, c’était un jeu, je me racontais des histoires, ce en quoi j’excellais, on disait tu iras loin, et j’étais persuadée que c’était vrai. Longtemps, étudier a été une échappatoire, une fierté, un moteur d’ambition, quelque chose que j’aimais.

J’écrivais mes dictées comme des lettres d’amour. Je récitais l’alphabet comme un poème. Etudier valait la peine.

Aujourd’hui, maintenant que je suis adulte (qu’il est laid, ce mot, qu’il est écrasant), étudier est un mot qui me tord le ventre. Ce sont sept lettres comme une menace irrationnelle, sept lettres en moi qui font résonner les pierres. Pour mes études j’ai créé des échos qui font rouler des graviers dans ma gorge et me lacèrent de l’intérieur, l’angoisse en est devenue physique, et moi je suis : incontrôlable. J’ai des coups de sang, des crises de larmes, des rages infantiles. Je me noie entre mes fiches et mes listes interminables.

Il faut croire que même les études réveillent des monstres. Je suis terrifiée : de rater ma vie, de ne rien valoir, de me battre sans savoir pourquoi. Je suis terrifiée de poursuivre dans cette voie et de me rendre compte dans trente ans que ce n’était pas la mienne, que voilà, je me suis trompée, et que j’ai passé toute une vie à satisfaire des désirs qui n’étaient jamais les miens. C’est que je ne suis pas faite pour choisir, je n’ai pas de voie, non ; je suis mouvante et incapable de faire le deuil des possibles.

Je ne sais pas me définir sans ma quête de perfection, mes ambitions démesurées, mes exigences tyranniques. Je ne suis pas : sociable, jolie, intéressante, drôle, désirable. Alors je ne sais pas qui je suis si je ne parviens pas à réussir. C’est tout ce qu’il me reste. Je ne sais rien faire d’autre que cela, répondre à des exigences académiques, rentrer dans la norme, avoir un parcours sans accrocs.

Pour la première fois, étudier n’est pas facile. Peut-être que je n’irai pas si loin. Peut-être a-t-on placé en moi trop d’espoirs, trop d’attentes : des étouffements. J’ai l’impression que je n’ai jamais grandi, que j’ai fait semblant. Comment se faire à l’idée de décevoir ?

Will I be okay ?

Will I ?

Fuck the meritocracy

Fascism is on the rise

I will not be the first target

but I'm scared I will be the second

I should fight like hell

For me, for my friends

But I'm tired and powerless

Things don't feel like

they're getting better

Help.

We're supposed to be one

of the best countries

when it comes to social rights

But they're slowly

Eroding

There's nowhere else to go

when it all comes to shit

I can't run

No flight only fight

or freeze

I don't get a second chance

I pray to any god that listens

Don't let it come to that.

I pray to my peers

Don't let it come to that.

I pray to the reader

Don't let it come to that.

But I might preach to the choir

Don't let it come to that.

And I pray to the ones that want me dead

Take pity, be human

Or I will have to fight to death

It's not too late

I will try to take you down with me

Make you suffer like you make me

Or maybe I won't

Maybe when the time comes

I will be weak

I don't wanna find out

Don't let it come to that.

The split physical/mental model of disability is a lot like the gender binary, if you think about it.

For one, the categories are believed to be discrete boxes when in fact they have a LOT of overlap (consider autism/adhd-related dyspraxia - even relatively mild cases can make someone injury-prone enough to justify owning mobility aids just in case and severe cases can be functionally indistinguishable from any other mobility disability - chronic pain and other sensory issues, the fact that sensory processing disorders can sometimes be functionally indistinguishable from not having an affected sense at all, the mental impacts of traumatic brain injuries, and so much more) - depending on how you graph factors around them (comorbidity, noncommittal nonbinary identities based on social alienation, etc.) they might not even be a "full" inverse bell curve but a pretty well flattened one.

For two, the divide is given power by people's belief in it, NOT by any material reality of its existence - which means it's difficult but also critical to criticize people's behavior about it WITHOUT implying or claiming it has inherent merit; you can't just go around pretending that people DON'T act differently depending on what side of the binary they perceive someone as being on, but you also can't just decide that the the fact that people do that as a general thing means all individual people on any given side of that perceptual divide necessarily have the same specific internal experience, and it's totally alien to anyone on the opposite side of it.

Lost followers after reblogging that whole thing about JKR being radicalized over the years, and that disturbs me.

Like if you think saying that people can be radicalized and manipulated into hate is somehow justifying it, yikes. And if you think that people are somehow just good or evil and that you are not at risk of buying into propaganda, have I got some very red flag news about that!

Idk if its because I am an older Millennial maybe (most who unfollowed were younger) but I watched a ton of that generation slide from one of the most progressive to the far right before my every eyes. Hell, my dad fought alongside his black friends in the Detroit race riots and now he watches Fox News 24/7 and talks about the border wall. Yet still claims he could never be racist because of how he used to be. He doesn’t even realize what he has become.

JKR isn’t a deluded old woman or innately evil, but in fact THE prime example of how well-meaning ignorance and privilege can be weaponized and encouraged down a pipeline, until it turns into a force of hate, and should be a cautionary tale about why educating and being open about these issues are necessary. Because there are those out there who will use those divisions and ignorance to their own ends. And just digging in our heels and saying “that could never be me!” is the very thing that puts you more at risk. I’ve lost so many loved ones down that pipeline and it is more slippery than most realize.

Stay alert, stay compassionate, stay humble, and make sure you move through life guided by reason rather than reaction. I love y’all and don’t want to see your passion twisted to get used against the world.

just a reminder - do NOT boycott streaming services or not watch new things. the unions have not called for one for a reason. for one, it affects residual payments, which as minimal as those currently are, actors are still getting them during this time, and for two, studios will use lack of viewership as an excuse to cancel shows because you are showing them there is no demand. it deeply affects the industry the writers and actors stand to come back to once the strike is over

Yes we need more chaste twee baby gay romances like heartstopper and yes we also need more shows where men fuck raw to express their love for one another like Élite and yes we need more toxic gays having hate sex like Interview with the Vampire and yes we need more incidental gay characters like the dads in cartoons like Owl House.

It's not a competition! It's a hoard and I'm like a gay little Smaug.