I Have One Chapter Posted And About A Dozen In Working Progress. It’s Called Genetic Soup.

“What do you know about infectious diseases?” -teacher

“They spread” -person

“Does that make sluts diseases?” -me

Black Pirate Dude

-unironically wears a trench coat

-“I’m not mad just disappointed”

-god tier sceptic

-dramatic flare the size of the fucking sun

-I’m a bad bitch you can’t kill me

-Badass TM

The Avengers: a summary

Thot

- majestic - good hair - straight ally - total feminist - Better Than You - best brother

America’s Ass

- t h i c c - disaster bisexual - literal golden retriever - n i p p l e s - sad about the bae

Tony Stank

- the literal definition of adhd - runs on coffee and cocaine - judging you - terrible boyfriend, pretty good husband - “3000? thAt’S cRaZy”

angry grinch

- weed dealer - always angry - anxiety - too tired to be stark’s best friend

bird 1

- actual disaster - weirdly nice arms - married?????? - actually not in love with black widow - probably has tried to steal a dog at least once

mama spider

- will kill - terrifying - somehow always looks amazing - steve rogers’ relationship advisor - love? for children

bird 2

- supersoldier babysitter - everyone’s favourite - done - to the left - hates his bestie’s boyfriend - not problematic in the slightest - actual angel there is nothing wrong with him whatsoever

quippy black best friend

- somehow hasn’t killed tony stark yet - was just put there for comic relief but now everyone loves him - the best character in endgame - troll

bonky

- chaotic gay - sad - good hair - still annoyed at his husband for something that happened in 1943 - power bottom

spiderling

- baby - was immediately adopted - definitely trans - gen z - wants to die

So Zeus without all his dick children

Hey not to sound evil, but if I had the power to cast lightnin bolt on anyone I wanted, I'd use it on people who inconvenience me even slightly

Nah. I cut my own fringe blind and cut my fingernail in a pencil sharpener

reblog if u too have shaved off your eyebrows bc u were like 12 and deficient in impulse control

😂

Bruce, to Shuri and Peter: listen up, teens. There's nothing meme about smoking cigarettes. It's not "Netflix and chill" to do a drug. Fidget spin yourself into church

This is precious

“Does anybody else know?” 

“Nobody”

Everyone needs somebody so I gave Peter a dog. 

Bucky: I only just met Peter but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone here and hunt down whoever did it brutally and efficiently

Loki: I’m like a candle.

Thor: In what way?

Loki: I’ll burn your house down if you leave me alone.

Thor: Again, that’s called arson. It’s illegal.

Loki: Apparently spite isn’t a good answer to what motivates you.

The problem is Gray never knows where his clothes are

Juvia: Juvia is cold.

Gray: Here have my jacket.

Lucy: I'm cold.

Natsu: Want me to set you on fire?