I Want A Wife By Judy Brady Really Is A Summary Of Why The Patriarchy Continues To Exist. If Your Capable

Okay last post for the night.

A person recommended on a post to look up the white supremicist concept of ‘the right to comfort’, so I look it up and find that it’s kind of irrelevant to what they were talking about (No actually, thinking wearing a ball gag in public as an exhibitionist kink without making sure everyone there wants to be a part of said experience isn’t related to this) BUT it is relevant to other things. The right to comfort is about people with power (specifically white people in America) disliking conflict. It’s more important to keep the peace than to actually discuss or fight for any of our rights. Everyone should just calm down and be nice, no one can take you seriously if you come across as too mean. It’s about tone policing, dishonesty and silencing of victim’s voices because their experiences make you too uncomfortable to think about.

…

Anyway.

If you sincerely want me to fuck off, say it again in the next reply or don’t reply at all. It seems like you replied because you wanted to have a conversation but if you don’t I won’t make you have one.

That being said I’m not pro-religion and I’d like any kind of citation of ‘faux feminism’ being equally responsible for abuse as an industry where the vast majority of people express that they do not want to be involved in it but lack the means to escape. I’d like to know how faux feminism compares to Pornhub’s founder admitting to profiting from videos made without the consent of its users.

https://www.justice.gov/usao-edny/pr/pornhub-parent-company-admits-receiving-proceeds-sex-trafficking-and-agrees-three-year

Your argument isn’t even pro-sex-industry though, it’s just saying, ‘other groups are also bad so don’t look at this one’. Should I not critique Amazon because it pays its workers and Nestle and Apple use actual literal child and slave labor or are all four groups worth fucking despising for how they take advantage of vulnerable people?

the fact that criticizing the sex industry is seen as more oppressive than the sex industry itself should really make people think

”No one is saying you have to-“

Well ignoring the last post that literally said, ‘there is no version of no to a penis that I consider morally acceptable’ - when you call something an ‘-ist’ or ‘ic’ you’re making a negative value assessment of a behavior. If I said, ‘that’s misogynistic’ it is saying that the behavior negatively impacts female people and there’s a moral obligation to change it.

So when you call refusing sex an ‘-ist’ or ‘-ic’ act you are saying there is a moral obligation to have sex with people based on a given trait.

Op is saying that therapy is the wrong tool to use against bigotry, not that no bigot can ever change their beliefs. If a rich person believed ‘poor people are poor because they’re born genetically inferior’, that belief likely wouldn’t cause them problems in their day to day life. It’s probable that it wouldn’t come up at all and it’s not really a therapists job to make them confront that belief or change it in any way if they’re fine holding that belief (ie the belief isn’t pathological). That doesn’t mean the belief can’t be changed *at all*- Evangelical Christianity is an ideology that therapy isn’t supposed to fix but it’s something a person can be talked in or out of believing through books, dialogue with peers etc.

you cannot therapize misogyny out of a man because values are not pathologies. him not believing women are human will not be fixed by cbt or exposure therapy because it is not a cognitive health issue. it is an ideological one.

"separatism/anti-natalism is so unrealistic. it won't fix the problem." okay and marrying men worked? bearing their children worked? educating them worked? transing your gender worked? did the patriarchy stop when you wore eyeliner "sharp enough to kill a man"? did it stop when you got a mastectomy? did it come to a screeching halt when you said "sex work is work" and "not all men"? bffr

what i find most frustrating about the “do men of color benefit from patriarchy?” discourse on twitter is that those who deny that they do NEVER talk about the oppression women of color face from racism/imperialism AND the misogyny from their own communities. that’s how i know they care more about coddling abusive men of color than protecting women of color.

“Female-assigned intersex kids’ vaginal canal size is also assessed by doctors, to ensure that it’s long enough to fit a penis inside of it. Doctors might surgically construct or re-construct vaginas, which can result in a host of health problems and necessitate multiple, multiple surgeries. This is especially the case since most intersex kids have these surgeries very young, and when their bodies grow into their adult forms, more surgeries are necessary to keep their vagina size in proportion. Non-surgical methods are also used to increase or maintain vaginal length by regularly using medical dildos to stretch the vagina over months and years. (It’s kind of like braces for your vagina, but much, much worse.) Just like there are no standards for how long a clitoris “can” be before it’s classified as a penis, there aren’t absolute standards as to how long a vagina is for it to be of “normal” length. I had a dilation procedure performed for almost every exam I had with intersex doctors from the time I was 8 until I was 16, so that they could check how long my vagina was as I grew. I absolutely hated these procedures. I mean, imagine a man as old as your father or your grandfather, who you don’t know, inserting a medical dildo into you each time you saw him, knowing that you can’t question the doctor’s orders and just accept that you have to undergo these uncomfortable procedures for your health. Imagine a decade or so later, realizing that these procedures did nothing to track your health, and had everything to do with grown men feeling good about the fact that you could fuck some dude someday like a “normal girl”. That all those traumatizing procedures weren’t actually medically relevant at all, and it actually was within my right to refuse those examinations. I didn’t know any of that at the time. I also had no idea that I wouldn’t want to ultimately have the kind of sex they assumed I’d be having, adding yet another layer of this-was-totally-unnecessary/messed-up to my history. Other kids shouldn’t have to go through this. Other adults shouldn’t have revelations some day far into the future that what was happening to them WASN’T okay, and their traumatic feelings ARE valid, and the whole system of how intersex people are conceptualized and “treated” IS entirely fucked. And it’s gotta change. We’ve gotta change it.”

—

—-Claudia at Autostraddle

I just read this article and was reminded once again how invisible the intersex community often is… we need to signal boost this shit to let people know that this kind of “medical treatment” is NOT okay.

(via bossybussy)

Felt straight-up ill reading this. This is the institutionalized rape of children. It’s beyond unconscionable that procedures like this are normalized and considered “treatment”.

(via thaxted)

jfc

(via stammsternenstaub)

Revolting and repugnant.

See why intersex folk don’t like their medical issues being used as a rhetorical gotcha?

(via appropriately-inappropriate)

Can they please go one day without making everything about themselves

a female director creating a sledgehammer-blunt story about the absurd horror of the beauty standards of hollywood and the visceral self-loathing and mental health issues it inspires in women? no. its secretly about transitioning. omfg how obnoxious can u get

"Men in dresses are seen as bad, but women in pants aren't!"

is not the statement that "men can't be feminine but women can be masculine in society" that you think it is.

Let me introduce: women with facial hair. Full beards. Mustaches. Bald women. Bodybuilder women. Women with visible body hair. These aren't "more acceptable" than men in dresses.

Pants don't have a gendered association anymore, while dresses do. There is something to be said for that, but it certainly ISN'T "masculine women are acceptable now."