the point of art is not to be great but to make it transparently obvious that there is something wrong with you
'The dull pain that you live with isn't getting any duller', 'See that young man who dwells inside his body like an uninvited guest' and 'Life is too short to refrain from eating jam out of the jar' have got to be responsible for like six or seven really good decisions over the course of my life.
i am healthy ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ i am whole ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ but i hav ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ e poor imp ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ulse control ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ & i wanna go home ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ but j am home ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
I fell asleep in my friends' arms. It was eleven at night, we were tired, curled up in a small pile on my tiny bed. I had my head buried in my roommate's side, and one of my closest friend's hand on my shoulder, steadying me. It was quiet and nothingness and peace and their heartbeats in my ears, my hands in their hair.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
We pack four people to that little bed, you know. Laps used as footrests, collarbones as pillows, little lights like moonlight in rustic yellow bathed on their faces. The TV plays an anime. The words are repeated by my dear friend on my shoulder, curled close. My legs are asleep; my roommate may be, too.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
The cat curls on top of our criss cross mess of legs and arms and heads on chests to absorb the warmth of us all. She purrs in contented peace. When my roommate and I are left alone in the quiet, she cries, and watches the door for our friends' return.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
I will never kiss them but the top of their heads. I will never touch but the warmth of their arms. I will never take more than what's freely given, and in return I put my glasses on the bedside table fashioned from a guitar amp, and when I lean into their sides, I pick up my vulnerability and place it in their capable, tender hands.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
I sing for them. I cry for them. I work and I run and I withstand the worst of the world for them, because some days I get to cradle their forehead on my shoulder and some days I get to see their shining eyes.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
Maybe to you. But look beyond explanation. I love them. With my heart in my unsteady hands, with my nose pressed to the side of their head, with the buzzing in my feet and the warmth all around Iike the sunset pushing into the window.
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
Is it enough to say I love them? With no strings attached? With reckless abandon and utter devotion and freedom and kindness and fear?
"there is no platonic explanation for this--"
I cannot explain it any clearer. I love my friends. There is no more to say.
I'm so sick of people saying water doesn't taste. Water fuckin TASTES
guards! read me my bedtime yaoi
god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait