𝚆𝙰𝙻𝙺𝙸𝙴 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝙽𝙽𝙴𝙻 #𝟶𝟶𝟼: Cole & Max

xx.

Cole never could’ve imagined this-- any of this-- when Adam Richards had approached him to be his English tutor freshman year. He’d known who Adam was, of course, because everyone did. It was normal to have a crush on the hot and funny and sweet quarterback, as evidenced by the conversations he had with the cheerleaders, except for the fact that Cole was a boy, too. He’d made peace with it, figured it would pass when Adam graduated and Cole would hear about his engagement to Chrissy Cunningham one day from some nosy mom in the Melvald’s checkout line. That was how things were supposed to be. But then, one night in February after a few hours of studying for an English test, Adam had kissed Cole.

Everything changed that day, and Adam quickly became the subject of all of Cole’s thoughts. They were inseparable for three years, and those were easily the best three years of Cole’s life. In every way, Adam was Cole’s balance: where Cole was shut off and withdrawn, Adam was open and giving, where Cole was book smart, Adam was emotionally intelligent, where Cole was cautious, Adam was trusting. Cole wasn’t religious at all, but he truly believed they were meant to find each other, and he never hesitated to tell Adam as much. So when Adam died in the ‘freak accident’ just before they were going to run away together, Cole’s life halted. Since then, he’d felt like he was a ghost, moving through the motions of life despite being completely detached. He didn’t really care what happened to him, not if it was without Adam. And when Adam came back? It was supposed to be good, and easy, and they were supposed to move on. It was still good, Adam was still Adam, but it was impossible to ignore the reality of the situation: that Adam had died and come back, and there were side effects.

Still, it was worth it to try-- to push it to the side for a few hours at least. When Adam offered to plan a date, Cole was elated. When he showed up at Cole’s door with their usual from Benny’s, Cole had wanted to cry. He had longed for this for so long. He’d gathered a few things in a bag of his own-- his dusty copy of The Odyssey, a chapstick, his house key, a few rogue pens and highlighters, and at the very bottom of the bag, his flask. Just in case things went South, not that they would, he just didn’t really go anywhere without it these days. Cole left the bag on the floorboards of the passenger seat and climbed into the truck bed with Adam. Like it was the most natural thing in the world, Cole scooted closer to him and nestled into his chest, angling his face to the sky to look at the stars like they’d done dozens of times before. “Mhmm,” he hummed contentedly, smiling at the memory. “We were so worried someone would find us,” he chuckled. “Worth the risk.” All of it was worth the risk-- Cole would always choose Adam, always. Cole shoved Adam away jokingly, “In my defense, what the fuck are jumper cables?” He laughed, though, unable to resist Adam with that grin. As they shifted and Adam leaned against Cole, he ran his fingers through the other’s hair gently. Everything about this felt so right, and Cole felt completely at peace. As Adam kissed his cheek, Cole caught his chin and lifted it so their lips met. “I love you,” he responded, feeling pressure building behind his eyelids. Not tonight, surely he could go one night without crying. “Thank you for this,” he said, kissing Adam’s forehead with a smile. 

WHO: Adam Richards & @loverboymontgomery​

WHAT: What were Richgomery doing during town hall????

WHERE: A backroad of Hawkins, somewhere near Lover’s Lake

Adam had met Cole during his sophomore year, not long after being named starting quarterback. Cole was in his English class - a year ahead of others in his grade, and far better at understanding literature than Adam could ever hope to be. The second he’d seen the snarky brunette who always had something to say in class, Adam had been hooked. For a long time he thought that maybe he just saw the other guy as someone he really, really wanted to be friends with, but eventually, it clicked why he was so obsessed with Cole. And once Adam’s grade began to drop in English because he just didn’t understand why people used metaphors or similes or whatever ( why couldn’t everyone just say exactly what they meant all the time ? ), asking Cole to help him seemed like it would solve two problems for him. Suddenly, he could spend all the time he wanted alone with Cole, getting to know him and liking him more each day, and he could bring up his grade. 

It hadn’t taken long before something had shifted between them, and Adam had made the first move. Kissing Cole without knowing how the other felt about him was scary - historically speaking, kissing another boy without asking typically didn’t end well for guys. But, Cole had kissed him back. He had been so kind and sweet and patient while Adam figured out how to tell Chrissy about it all, which had thankfully gone well. Then, Adam and Cole had gotten three beautiful years together in high school, full of them slipping love notes into the other’s locker, hanging out in Adam’s car together after football games, saying I love you for the first time, riding together on the bus to away games, studying together, and even slow dancing together at Prom in one of the empty classrooms. It had been perfect. Every single thing about their relationship in high school had been beautiful, untainted by any of the complicated feelings that existed there now because of Adam’s death and the grief it had caused. So Adam hadn’t been surprised when Cole had sadly admitted to wanting to go back to that - to get to experience how happy they’d been. How simple it had felt. And Adam had decided to rise to the challenge and do his best to plan a night for them where they could feel like that again. 

They had each planned plenty of dates for the other in high school, but there was always a trick to it. It had to still feel like a date - not just two friends hanging out - without drawing too much attention to themselves. They weren’t like Chrissy and Jason or Chance and Bev; they couldn’t share a kiss or hold hands across the table. Being openly affectionate in public wouldn’t end well for them, so they’d always had to get creative. Tonight, Adam had ordered them takeout from Benny’s, getting their usual order as well as a milkshake to split. He’d loaded his truck with blankets and pillows, and driven them out to a field on the edge of town. The farmer who owned the land was older, he wouldn’t even notice them parked back here off the main road. After they’d eaten and gotten everything set up, Adam sat back against the pillows, looking up at the stars. “Remember when we did this for the first time?” He asked Cole, leaning closer to him. “The summer after we’d gotten together.” Adam had gotten his truck around then, and had taken Cole out on drives all the time. “Oh, or that time you freaked out and swore a snake had gotten back here, but it was just my jumper cables?” Adam laughed, grinning at Cole. Shuffling closer to Cole, Adam laid down, resting his head on Cole’s shoulder. There had been so much weird tension between them lately, and Adam had felt like he had no idea how to even address it, let alone fix it. But right now, he wasn’t worried about it. He just wanted to enjoy a date with Cole, not caring about bomb or the Doppelganger or the Mindflayer or anything else. Just the two of them, here, together. “I love you,” He said softly, leaning up to kiss Cole’s cheek. 

rcbinbvckleys​:

⚢

“i think some faces are just, way more noticeable than others.” it would have been much easier to pretend that she didn’t know him at all, but words had escaped her mouth way quicker than robin’s mind working to figure that one out. hopefully, she’d just managed to pull it back. if cole ever actually found out… she’d practically beg the ground to swallow her up. 

“truthfully if you said that you didn’t know him, only then would i be surprised.” it felt like steve knew everyone, and they all definitely knew him. he had been known as king steve, after all. “and he was so obnoxious back then, right?” it wasn’t surprising that cole and he were friends, even if robin felt like there were some other details she didn’t know. “it was truly some crazy fucked up shit. i’ve never been more scared in my life.” until the events of 1986, but that was a whole other ball game. “if it wasn’t for steve and that stupid hair of his, i honestly don’t think i’d be here right now.”

xx.

“If this is your roundabout way of calling me pretty, I’ll take it,” he teased, trying to ease the tension. Hawkins High was a small school, anyways, so it shouldn’t be surprising that they’d seen each other around. He needed to let it go, but was used to being on the defensive with his classmates.

Cole laughed, nodding knowingly. He didn’t believe there was anyone who’d gone to Hawkins High in the last... six years, give or take, who didn’t know Steve Harrington. “Was, past tense?” he joked, “As far as I can tell, he’s still obnoxious. Less of an asshole, though.” Cole’s teasing quickly subsided into a sad smile. “I can’t imagine being here. It’s fucked up enough that I knew people who died, you know? Like, I can barely deal with that.” Deal with it was generous, as he really hadn’t, but Robin didn’t need the details. 

goldenboyrichards​:

Adam couldn’t wrap his brain around Cole’s words. There was no way. No way he had… because how could he be here now? If that had happened, why didn’t his family say anything? How could they just not remember? 

They had left his room exactly the same, down to the dirty clothes littering the floor and the half-drunk can of New Coke on his bedside table. At first, when he’d come home and seen that, he’d felt odd about it. Like he was a ghost, returning to the place he’d felt most comfortable haunting. Maybe… maybe there had been some truth to that feeling. But that was just impossible. Right? How could someone be dead for three years, then just come back like nothing had happened? 

Adam stopped that train of thought in it’s tracks. “No, I… no.” He said more firmly, shaking his head again. His hands let go of Cole briefly, only for his balled up fists to scrub at his eyes. “I didn’t die, Cole. I didn’t…” Adam repeated, voice pleading with Cole. Because he didn’t die. He couldn’t. What did that mean if he did? And what did it mean if he didn’t? “I left. I was in a commune. I’m sorry.” Adam repeated, voice breaking on his apology. 

And then Cole was kissing him, and the distress he’d just felt melted away slightly. It wasn’t gone. It was just shoved away to the back of his mind, deep in a dark place where Adam could hold on to it until he felt ready to process something that huge. Adam’s arms returned to Cole, wrapping around him and pulling him close. For the first time ever, Adam didn’t really care that they were in a semi-public place. Mrs. Sanders be damned. He kissed Cole sweetly, making up for the three years they’d been apart as best as he could. Adam ached for that time back, but he would take what he could get now. As they pulled away, Adam leaned his forehead against Cole’s, sighing at how right it felt. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here.” 

xx.

Cole’s heart leapt into his throat at Adam’s pleading tone. He wished he hadn’t said anything, and just let Adam go on believing that he’d gone away to a commune. But Cole had never been able to lie to Adam, nor did he ever want to. He knew that, although it was entirely too much to understand, Adam would want to know. Maybe he even needed to know, so he could stop punishing himself for ‘leaving Cole.’ But only when he was ready, only on his own terms-- Cole felt a pit in his stomach as he remembered Max’s description of the Mindflayer and how it possessed its victims. Something akin to rage flared up in Cole’s body thinking about it hurting Adam, but he buried the feeling for now. That was something to ask Max about later.

Meeting Adam’s eyes, Cole shook his head. “Please stop apologizing,” he said, brushing a stray tear off of Adam’s cheek. It made his chest physically ache to hear the pain in his voice.  “I don’t blame you. I know it wasn’t your fault.” Cole’s eyes welled up again as he offered Adam a smile. “I’m just so glad you’re here, that you’re okay. I love you. I always will.”

Cole paused again, barely resisting the urge to kiss away his questions. “I might have some answers... about what happened. We can talk about it, whenever you’re ready,” he promised, taking Adam’s hands and squeezing them for comfort. Distantly aware that they were still on the Richards’ front porch, but unwilling to leave Adam, Cole tugged on his hand. “Want to come over to my place?” he asked, knowing that his house afforded them more privacy, as it was only him and his mom. 

Cole had a lot on his mind. Despite the glaringly obvious-- being pushed into open graves, having horrific visions, and his boyfriend coming back to life-- now they were fighting. Kind of. It wasn’t a fight, really, but things were tense in a way they never had been before. And Cole really didn’t know how to handle himself in a fight-- he could give great advice to people like Steve, sure, but when it came to him? He was miserable and whiny and terrified to say too much or not enough.

He’d been going over the whole night all morning-- everything he said, every look they exchanged, looking for anything to find comfort in. And it was driving him crazy. So crazy that he decided to go into work on a day he wasn’t scheduled. He had leftover inventory to do, anyway. Cole clicked ‘The Queen is Dead’ into his Walkman and skated over to the Music Center. The Smiths were, objectively, the perfect music for wallowing in self-pity.

A few hours passed of Cole listening to the album on repeat and getting a surprising amount of work done. It was nice to drown out his brain for a while, uninterrupted except for when the clerk told him that he was singing out loud again. As he finished up cataloguing the folk section, Cole looked up to see Jo walking in. His cheeks flushed involuntarily-- this Keith guy’s paper had been pushed to the back of Cole’s mind, but not forgotten. 

Stepping through the aisles, Cole approached her and lowered his headphones. “Good album,” he commented, always a little relieved when someone with taste came into the store. He offered an awkward smile-- it looked more like a grimace-- as she commented on his state. “Not quite, I just have naturally dewy skin,” he joked. His hangover was certainly still with him, as per the pressure behind his eyes. “You feeling okay?”

He laughed, relief evident in his tone. Thank God she had brought it up. “No, no, yeah, I didn’t think you... I mean, even if you did...” Cole groaned at how awkward he was making this. “Jo, you’re great. I’m just... not... I don’t feel that way! So, I’m glad we’re on the same page.” He said, finding his words at last. 

Cole knew better than to listen to anything published in that shitty paper when Keith suggested that Cassie Conrad go for Thad or Adam. Talk about misreading the room. But still, he didn’t want to give anyone the wrong idea, or completely ignore it and come off like an asshole.  

“Anyways,” he said, dragging out the syllables. “Can I ask you something? About the keg party?” Cole knew that Jack and Adam were close, and thought that maybe, if Adam had said something to Jack, maybe Jack had said something to Jo. Worth a shot, at least. 

where: the music center

what: jo’s browsing through some new sweet tunes !

who: @loverboymontgomery​​ + jo

truly, it felt like her first day off in weeks, and jo intended to spend it as follows: lounging in bed as long as possible ( until her mother started passive aggressively vaccuming up and down the hallways, seeing as this was her day off, too ), driving down to the music centre to browse through their latest releases and then straight back home to work on the board. a perfect day, in her humble opinion. or as perfect as it got in hawkins, indiana.

with the first part of her day off concluded, jo had wasted no time grabbing her walkman, pulling her headphones over her ears before she’d even left the house to drown out her mother’s incessant sighing. not even half of side a was finished when she’d reached the music center - a new personal best - and she quickly locked her bike, rushing into the store, straight to the aisle with the new releases.

humming happily to herself, a content smile on her face as she inspected a copy of the new cocteau twins album, jo jumped sligthly as a figure came into view. she looked up, pulled her headphones down around her neck. “oh - hi, montgomery.” said somewhat awkwardly, she gave him a smile. it felt a bit silly, calling him by his last name with how often jo came into the store. “i see you’ve recovered from the keg party.”

a couple of beats passed, jo hesitated, drew in a breath - no, it wouldn’t leave her mind. she had to say something. “listen - keith is an ass.” a bold yet true statement, another beat passed before jo continued. “like… i don’t know if you’ve seen his stupid little paper, but.. .i don’t know, he’s spreading rumors that i, like, have a thing for you? and i just wanted to make clear that i don’t. i’m not into you, cole, i promise!”

Call Me by Your Name (2017)

@goldenboyrichards

goldenboyrichards​:

Being co-host of the camping trip, Adam had had to spend awhile checking in on everyone else when they got back. A lot of theories were being thrown around, as well as stories from the cabin, but he wasn’t paying much attention to them. They sort of went over his head. He didn’t know what grabbed him and Cole, but it had felt stronger than algae. He couldn’t be sure, though. 

Cole drifting away from the others wasn’t surprising to Adam. He understood needing a minute after all of that, and it was starting to get a bit cold out here now that the sun had gone down. Without asking, he passed Cole one of the hoodies he’d brought with him in his duffle bag. If anyone noticed that Cole was wearing his clothes, Adam was kind of beyond caring. He’d do anything that Cole needed him to do right now. 

“You didn’t make it up,” Adam assured with sad eyes, hating that what had happened to them was real. If only it could have been some fucked up nightmare or something. “I’m fine,” He assured, giving Cole a small smile. Honestly, he was worried. But there were no physical marks on him, and he and Cole had both eventually made it to shore. Adam would be okay - this was just another weird thing to add to the list of awful stuff happening around him lately. “I’m not going anywhere.” Adam glanced around, checking to make sure no one was paying too much attention to them. Once he was sure they were safe, he squeezed Cole’s knee in reassurance. 

As Cole began begging him to leave with him, Adam’s heart ached. That had always been the plan, hadn’t it? But Adam had fucked it up somehow three years ago, leaving Cole alone to pick up the pieces. And as much as Adam wanted to go now, he thought about his mother. His dad. Beth, Cindy. He couldn’t just leave them again. He couldn’t run away this time. When he and Cole left, they deserved to know in advance. “Cole,” Adam began sadly, squeezing his hand. “Cole, I want that so bad. I want us to go to California like we planned. I want that.” He assured him, voice steady because someone had to be. “But I can’t leave my family right now. My mom…I don’t think she’s sleeping much, these days. My dad calls home to check and make sure I’m still here every few hours when he’s at work. My sisters didn’t stop crying for hours when I finally came back,” Adam rambled, running a hand through his hair. “I just can’t go right now. I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” 

xx.

When Adam passed Cole his hoodie, he smiled. Though it was a cliche, he loved wearing Adam’s clothes-- so much so that he’d periodically stolen dozens of shirts, hoodies, and jackets over the years. He brushed his hand against Adam’s and tugged the hoodie on, trying to act cool, calm, and collected when he was anything but. Both because he was freaking out about whatever had grabbed them in the lake and because Adam was here, looking at him with those eyes, and he wasn’t allowed to hold him.

“Kind of wish I did,” Cole said, with a sigh. He wished he had answers for Adam-- or rather, that his answers made any fucking sense. When Max had told him about the Upside Down and the Mindflayer and the fucked up shit happening in Hawkins, it had actually made him feel better, for a while. He finally knew that Adam hadn’t died hating him, that he was... possessed. But when Adam showed back up with a completely different story, any comfort Cole took in the truth was long gone. 

I’m not going anywhere. Cole closed his eyes for a moment and willed himself to believe it. Only, Adam couldn’t guarantee that. Cole couldn’t guarantee that either. Adam coming back both gave Cole a future again and threatened his utter demise. Losing Adam once had already destroyed him, but the thought of losing him twice felt like a death sentence. He did his best to muster up a smile, so as not to worry his boyfriend, but Cole knew better. Adam was always able to tell when something was up. 

Cole knew Adam’s answer before he elaborated, just based on the way he said his name. He nodded profusely along as Adam spoke, as guilt settled into his stomach. Of course Adam couldn’t leave his family now. He’d just gotten caught up in the moment, in his own fears, and was desperately trying to find something to cling to. “Of course, love. Of course,” he murmured, squeezing Adam’s hand back. “I’m sorry, that was... I was being emotional. I don’t want you to leave your family.” If anything, Cole wanted to bring Adam’s family with them. “I understand how they feel. I’m so scared of losing you again,” he finally admitted, rubbing circles on Adam’s hand with his thumb. 

After the mall protest, Cole had been laying low. Partially because he had deliberately lied to the cops, partially because his mom made it very clear that he was on thin fucking ice after wrecking the car. When Max offered up her house for the night, he accepted without question. It was more low-key than their usual late-night rendezvous at the skatepark, and he definitely craved the company. So Cole stopped off at the 24-hour grocer, grabbed a six pack and a few bags of chips, and skated to Max’s trailer.

He thought he was plenty quiet, but Max’s expression showed he was wrong. Clicking the door behind him, Cole slung the backpack off his shoulder and unzipped it, revealing the beer and chips. He rolled his eyes, “I’ll kindly remind you that this fractured finger was an attempt to save your ass, Maxine. Here, I got beer and chips, wasn’t sure what you’d have,” he plopped down on her bed, holding his finger up to the light with a pout. “It’s not so bad, thanks for asking.” He was being purposely dramatic. In an exaggerated whisper, he responded: “Breakfast sounds nice. Is this quiet enough?” 

He chuckled and started towards the window. “Fancy a joint? It’ll be just like old times,” he suggested, remembering the mall. He turned away from her, a smile tugging at his mouth as he remembered what he’d said in the mall, and how she’d reacted with kindness. She wasn’t half bad. 

WHO: max mayfield & @colemontgomeryx

WHERE: mayfield residence 

sleepovers were sacred rituals in the eyes of max mayfield. although usually reserved for the likes of el or on accident in the wheeler’s basement, after what cole shared with her at the blue quarry mall, he could be looped into one of her favorite past times. while it may have been more difficult to swing because she was grounded, she still made a way. her instructions to cole had been clear. wait until midnight, she’d leave the door unlocked, he could come in, lock it and make a clean break for her room. susan mayfield would have long been passed out on the couch or tucked into her room

the clocks eventually ticked 12 : 00 and max waited to hear her trailer go bump in the night. by the time cole was securely inside her room her eyes were narrowed pointedly at him, “you and that stupid fractured finger couldn’t make it inside anymore quietly?” she asked, but still stood to drag him onto her bed, “come on, sit.” she urged, then crossed to her stereo and flicked it on. the chances of her mom coming to check on her were slim, but in case she did, she wanted something to drown out the noise of her and cole’s chatter. Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car blasted throughout her room as she jumped onto the bed and joined cole. “anyhow, if you can manage to quiet down, i figured we could sneak out early and go get breakfast or something. i know the diner is closed but, we could find somewhere. if you want.” she snatched a magazine from her bedside table and began flipping through it as she explained to cole, “cigarettes are in my bedside table, weed is in the top dresser drawer. help yourself, just open a window when you do.”  

eddiemcnson​:

+++

see, cole could’ve hit eddie flat in the face with a giant metal sign that said ‘i’m into guys’ and he still wouldn’t have taken the hint. just…the thought of someone else in hawkins that was like him. surely not - or well, they just wouldn’t come right out the gate and say it. no, being…different, whatever kind of different, and living in that godforsaken town - for some people that was comparable to a death sentence.

still, his eyes widened, blinking at cole with that ‘deer caught in the headlights’ look as he hastily in- and exhaled the smoke. not that that did anything in terms of calming him down. on the contrary, eddie just started to fidget more. “as in….you like them or…like, like like them….” he felt like a fucking middle-schooler. but he just continued. “your boyfriend. you mean like when … wheeler and buckley or like, i dunno, girls call each other ‘girl-friends’ or like….like if…like, when wheeler called harrington her ‘boyfriend’ when they were still a thing?”

as confused as eddie was about the whole situation he apparently still had it in him to blush and get insanely flustered at cole’s….suggestion? if that’s what it was? lips parted, mouth dropped open slightly, he took another drag. his eyes never left cole’s, only once to go look around them, see if anyone was in earshot. negative. “h-how….”, his lips formed around words he didn’t say, a thousand scenarios flashes in his head. eddie blinked.”…how would - you, uh, prove….it?”

XX.

Cole felt bad, but he laughed at Eddie's inability to accept what he was told. It was a defense mechanism, he assumed, after many years of having to keep this part of him secret. For a moment, Cole was grateful for Adam-- grateful he had someone to share it with; in a way, it made this whole ordeal easier. More natural.

"He was my boyfriend-boyfriend," Cole explained. "As in, we fucked," he took a drag of his cigarette, granting Eddie time to take in what he said. "Sorry to be so explicit, but wasn't sure what else to say," Cole explained, though he wasn't really sorry. Part of him liked seeing Eddie squirm. He liked the effect his words had on the other.

Cole smirked, letting his eyes linger on Eddie's lips. He figured it would never happen, but he was open to all possibilities. Especially possibilities that looked like Eddie. "Well, I'm a gentleman. I'd take you out to dinner first," he winked, taking another drag of his cigarette.

eddiemcnson​:

+++

shit. shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. he should’ve known, should’ve known that this was a bad idea, should’ve known better than to ask a current resident of hicksville, indiana if he was flagging. stupid, stupid, god, what had he been thinking? nothing, apparently, and now his mind was wiped empty once more as he stared at cole blinking at him in confusion - and, what was that, curiosity? - as eddie scrambled for something to say. he cleared his throat. 

“never….mind.”, he said slowly, cautiously, tongue pressed to the roof of his mouth. shit. eddie shook his head. “nothing, nothing. i just thought -” oh my god, munson, shut the fuck up. “i just - “ no matter how hard he tried to stop himself the words now fell freely from his lips. “well, i wondered if you…well, do you know someone named - “ if he didn’t stop talking right then and there he was going to explode. well, spontaneous human combustion it was, as he simply carried on. “are you…perhaps a friend of, uh. of dorothy’s ? “ a beat passed, eddie sucked on his bottem lip nerverously. he waved it off. “you know what….nevermind. nothing. it was stupid.”

he flashed him a pained grin, nodded, ‘right, then’,  and turned on his heel. already squeezing his eyes shut because oh, the embarassment now creeped up on him, made his cheeks flush. at the last minute he decided to turn back, walk back to cole. “can i bum a cig off you?” please, please, heaven, god, if there is one - eddie thought to himself as he stared at cole expectantly -  please just don’t let him bring it up again.

xx.

Cole’s eyes sparkled with amusement and curiosity as he searched his brain. Dorothy? Flagging? What was Eddie trying to ask him? And why was he speaking in this obscure code? At first, Cole wondered if it was a DnD thing, but then realization hit when Cole spotted a bandana in Eddie’s back pocket. He instinctively reached for the bandana he’d tucked in his own pocket and the amusement on his face morphed to something akin to wonder. 

At Eddie’s question, Cole nodded and held out the pack, though his eyes were still glazed over. As Eddie plucked out a cigarette, Cole offered his lighter. He wanted to say something, at least to put Eddie at ease, but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to say it out loud. No one knew yet... well, that wasn’t true, because there was Steve and then there was Max. What the hell?

“I am, too,” Cole said, abruptly. He lowered the cigarette from his lips and looked at Eddie, motioning to the flag. For some reason, he felt the urge to prove it. God forbid Eddie thought he was playing a mean prank. “Do you remember Adam Richards? Tall, broad, blonde? He was my... well, you know,” Cole stumbled through his words, feeling his cheeks heat up. He was never this awkward.