My dad and I once had a disagreement over him using the adage "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
I said, "That's just not true. Sometimes what doesn't kill you leaves you brittle and injured or traumatized."
He stopped and thought about that for a while. He came back later, and said, "It's like wood glue."
He pointed to my bookshelf, which he helped me salvage a while ago. He said, "Do you remember how I explained that, once we used the wood glue on them, the shelves would actually be stronger than they were before they broke?"
I did.
"But before we used the wood glue, those shelves were broken. They couldn't hold up shit. If you had put books on them, they would have collapsed. And that wood glue had to set awhile. If we put anything on them too early, they would have collapsed just the same as if we'd never fixed them at all. You've got to give these things time to set."
It sounded like a pretty good metaphor to me, but one thing I did pick up on was that whatever broke those shelves, that's not the thing that made them stronger. That just broke them. It was being fixed that made them stronger. It was the glue.
So my dad and I agreed, what doesn't kill you doesn't actually make you stronger, but healing does. And if you feel like healing hasn't made you stronger than you were before, you're probably not done healing. You've got to give these things time to set.
“wow i can’t believe a trans cat girl hacked and leaked the no-fly list. the way we came about this information is so absurd, it’s funny” 🤝 “the actual information that was leaked is abhorrently racist, specifically towards middle eastern and south asian people. that is absolutely not funny and needs to be spoken about without the absurdity of the situation dominating the conversation”
i was watching a deep sea documentary and these underwater cameras found a bigfin squid hovering ominously in the vast, crushing darkness. it was really fun hearing the scientists talk over the footage like “what’s that?” “o-oh looks like a squid haha” like with audible tension til they got a clearer shot. i could hear them trying to logic through and reason “surely that’s not something horrible” in real time in their voices. meanwhile the squid’s just hovering there like an evil marionette master
You think Lip sometimes looks at Ian and Mickey and just smiles a little to himself because who would’ve seen that coming?
Like, Lip’s always been good with odds and numbers and back in the day, back when they started out a fucking lifetime ago, absolutely nobody would have bet on those two making it in the end.
He had been around back then, on the side lines catching glimpses from time to time. From ‘Mickey’s gay and we’re doing it’ and 'i know what he felt with me’ to 'you think i should’ve?’ and 'because i love him’.
And Lip hesitates in the doorway when he enters the living room for a moment and watches them lie on the couch in front of the TV, wrapped up in each other’s arms, sleepy and content, for once neither bickering nor on the verge of fucking and he thinks that he’s never seen Ian so happy and being himself this much at the same time before.
And maybe he shakes his head when he looks at the man in his brother’s arms because holy fucking shit that’s Mickey Milkovich right there.
That’s 'someone’s gotta get a beat down’, it’s 'oh shit is right’, it’s anger issues and russian prostitutes and attempted murder and escaping prison to fucking mexico.
But it’s also the guy who pours Ian his coffee in the morning and makes sure he doesn’t drink it before he’s had something to eat, who used to count his fucking pills, who once bought a bag full of B vitamins as if they could fix it all somehow.
It’s who Ian lost sleep over, it’s who he made his best bad decisions for.
It’s Franny’s Uncle Mickey, it’s Mandy’s older brother and holy shit, it’s Ian’s fucking husband.
And isn’t that so beautifully Ian, that he saw something in that dirty faced thug from ten years ago that no one else ever bothered to look for? that he found a love that proved itself to be stronger than whatever life or fate or Terry fucking Milkovich threw at them, that pulled them back to each other every time they fell apart?
Mickey has been a constant presence in Ian’s life in a way that nothing else but Lip himself ever had. Has been a witness, a catalyst, a victim of Ian’s epic highs and lows, has done insane things to and for and because of him. As fucked up as they always were, they seem to hold the balance, they somehow make it work.
Lip loves his brother with all his heart, has done so his entire life, he knows all the best and a lot of the worst of Ian and he knows that Mickey knows it too. Loves him, too. Signed up for it all, the whole package, good times and bad, sickness and health, Monica and Gay Jesus, mania and depression. Had probably signed up for it long before they stood in front of witnesses at the Polish Doll.
So Lip smiles sometimes when they bicker over breakfast cereal or when Ian can’t keep his hands to himself even when the rest of them is right there or when Mickey talks shit like he’s still big bad Milkovich, south side thug extraordinaire and not the boy who has been in love with Lip’s little brother for the last decade.
Because it’s nice to see they made it. Because if anyone deserves a happy ending and a gentle future, it’s them.
“Santo cielo!” Luigi cried out, laughing as the ghost continued his faithful administration of their usual morning greetings. The Italian did his best to control the beast, hand phasing through the spectral form as he tried to push Polterpup away. “Down, doggy, down! I’m up, I’m up!”
I hate queer discourse so much.
people are saying that it's "bad to support Maia (the no fly list leaker) because it's a bi lesbian"
literally none of this matters at all. queer discourse is a fake issue ment to distract you from actual bigotry and issues that affect the lives of queer people, and make you think that your enemies are other queer people.
think for five fucking seconds. this person just exposed national secrets (which should not have been secret in the first place). she is now going to be the target of thousands of people, transphobes, us nationalist, feds, and people who were exposed for being on the no fly list. are you seriously going to the people harassing it because it uses a label you were told you should hate?
I'm not saying you have to love this person. you don't even have to agree with her. but saying it's bad because of a label that literally no one has a problem with or even cares about offline is fucking stupid. either be happy for it, or ignore it. don't go out of your way to join in her harassment because of a label you hate for no reason other than people told you that you should.
You all need to be reminded that Queerplatonic Relationships are long term committed relationships that originated from aromantic people who want the consistency and loyalty in romantic relationships without the expectations of performing romance. If you don't want to commit to a platonic relationship, then you don't want a QPR ("platonic" word here is used as the opposite of "romantic" instead of "sexual" because some queerplatonic partners can be sexual and others can be non-sexual).
QPR is not just a quirky term for intense emotional friendship because any friendship can have that intimacy but not all friends commit to each other in the way that makes the relationship queer. The queerness in queerplatonic means we have a relationship that's so devoted and yet platonic because we are debunking amatonormativity here that dictates to us (by society) that romantic relationships must be the priority.
If you just want to kiss and hug your friends and hold their hands or anything else intimate but you don't think you can be committed to that friendship, it's not queerplatonic relationship you want. If you're misusing queerplatonic term, you're erasing the meaning of this word that helps aromantic people communicate our boundaries, expectations and experiences as queer people. Please just respect us. Treating QPR like it's just a "friendship" is as rude as treating it as "romance lite". I want a commitment but no romo. It's that simple.
will truly does it all doesn’t he. he’s sunshine he’s been a bit insane he’s gone missing his mother is winona ryder he’s a wizard he’s an artist he’s gay he’s desired by many while also being peculiar he doesn’t want to work he likes tucked in shirts he doesn’t like fighting he knows how to load a gun he has big green eyes he wears plaid he’s tired of people’s shit he’s incredibly understanding he’s just a teensy bit petty he’s into horror he looks up to his brother jonathan he doesn’t know what a bowl could be used for he shoves when he’s angry he chose alan turing to do a project on he’s theeeee final girl he’s great at giving hugs he’s selfless to the point of self destruction he’s literally been possessed he’s everything good in the world he got jabbed with a fire poker to be stopped from choking his mother like honestly who’s doing it like him :///
What we know about Goncharov so far:
PRODUCED by Scorsese, but DIRECTED by Matteo JWHJ 0715, get it right.
Robert De Niro, Al Pacino star, along with Cybill Shepherd. Released in 1973.
About Soviets in Naples dealing with the mob. Greatest mafia movie ever made, natch.
Ice Pick Joe is under rated.
Homoeroticism between Goncharov and Andrey is extremely popular in the modern day, bordering on explicit text and desire even through their rivalry and sublimated competing for Katya.
Katya is underused in the movie, and is a complicated character who is both the femme fatale, the center of a love triangle between Goncharov and Andrey, Goncharov’s wife, and also manipulating everyone.
There’s also a scene where Katya kisses Sofia? Tumblr lesbians go crazy.
Had political undertones and commentary, possibly about the failures of the Soviet Union, or leftist ideology vs. realpolitik.
Is over three hours long and kinda slow at times. Violent. Not as easy to watch as the memes and shipping would have you believe.
However conversely film bros who reduce to a badass gangster movie are missing so so much.
Has clock symbolism. Themes of how the characters are trapped in cycles of violence, revenge, hubris, tragedy. Lots of Catholic imagery.
Snubbed at awards, lack of official releases has turned it into a bit of lost media, despite how influential it was.
There have been talks of sequels/remakes through the years but nothing has ever come of it.