Straigbt Up "under It" And By "it" Well Lets Jusr Say, My Blankeys

sorry yeah, you're actually not allowed in the grocery store anymore. yeah, everyone thought it was super weird when you were rummaging in your wallet for your debit card and it was making everyone super uncomfortable and taking a long time. sorry

“i can fix him” “i can make him worse” i can imagine him in little scenarios every night as i’m falling asleep

after Jason reveals his identity as the Red Hood i like to think about the kids begging for Jason to hang out with them and rejoin the family and that but Jason’s being a little bitch about it so when Dick asks for his phone number he just throws an ouija board at him and says ‘i’ll sense it’

issue is that while slightly drunk and sad that his brother hates him, Dick decided to try it out, and Damian watching him through a crack in the door thought it would be funny to text Jason (because he actually does have his league bro’s number) about it so that Jason could maybe mention it the next time they see each other on patrol to freak Dick out, except Jason was working not too far from the manor at the time and he thought it would be even funnier to swing by, slam up against the window and scream through the glass ‘STOP FUCKING DRUNK TEXTING ME’ and absolutely scares the shit out of Dick. so now Dick thinks that ouija boards actually work on Jason because he’s still part ghost and Jason and Damian are scrambling to try and keep up the ruse because of how funny it is.

Teen gets violently attacked while away from home and ends up in a coma while his family thinks he's dead. Found later by his stepmother and is brought to her home for better care until he eventually wakes up and continues school before returning home to ask his law enforcer dad to stop his attacker that remains free

This is REALLY how I find out about that huh

I love the “Bruce is strong enough to pick up post-Lazarus Jason through sheer will and training” trope obviously, but picture:

Jason and Bruce being so heavy/muscular/fucking big, that they’re the only ones who can pick the other up.

Cue Bruce getting called in anytime Jason’s down and they need to move him. Or Jason getting pointed puppy eyes from Alfred until he sighs and picks Bruce up and carries him to bed after he passes out on the couch.

Are you going to let trump out live you

…

I have to do something drastic. Well maybe I don't but that's how I feel