"Should Parents Read Their Daughter's Texts Or Monitor Her Online Activity For Bad Language And Inappropriate

"Should parents read their daughter's texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"

Earlier today, I served as the “young woman’s voice” in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, “Should parents read their daughter’s texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?”

I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.

I reached for the microphone next. I said, “As far as reading your child’s texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, do not do that.”

Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.

Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a child’s back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, “This is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,” it was like I’d delivered a revelation.

It’s easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I don’t think I’d ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.

It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.

More Posts from Mjollydragon and Others

9 years ago

What were your poems about? You’ve gotten me curious.

My English teacher apologetically told me my poems were to controversial to tell in class (we’re in the poetry unit right now) and I can’t tell if I should be proud, concerned, or miffed.

9 years ago

For the record the ACLU considers enforcing dress codes differently based on gender to be a violation of Title IX. If you do this again and they send home girls but not boys for the same dress code violation you can threaten to sue them, that’s usually pretty effective.

MY SCHOOL DRESS CODE IS FUCKING SEXIST AND WE STARTED A MOVEMENT

SOOO I go to Bangor High School in the state of Maine and yesterday our assistant principal told us “to the ladies we don’t want to see you’re bodies, no bra straps, no short shorts, and no crop tops, it’s a distraction” So my friend Cat started a movement at our highschool asking everyone to participate in breaking the sexist dress code and wear spaghetti straps, and crop tops, and short shorts. Even the male student body made bra strap bracelets to support our cause and wore cut open muscle tanks. ONLY FEMALE STUDENTS WERE SENT HOME. BOYS ENTIRE CHESTS WERE SHOWING BUT OUR MIDDRIFTS GOT US IN TROUBLE. WE HAD TO MISS OUT ON OUR EDUCATION TO MAKE SURE THE MALE STUDENT BODY GOT THEIRS. TO MY SCHOOL IM SAYING FUCK YOU. TO MY FOLLOWERS PLEASE HELP ME PUT THIS SHIT ON BLAST!!!!!!

9 years ago

Feminism (n.)  The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes. (http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/feminism).

People saying that men can’t be raped are by definition not feminists, therefore it is nonsensical to use them as an example of why you aren’t a feminist.

Yes, men can get raped. But that’s not an argument against feminism

Basically Why I’m Not A Feminist

Basically why I’m not a feminist


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9 years ago

Harry Potter is the earliest one I can think of. There were probably others before that, but I can’t think of them off the top of my head.

what was your first special interest, that you can remember?


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9 years ago
Nobody Nose What Happened That Night, I’m Being Sirius

Nobody nose what happened that night, I’m being sirius

9 years ago

AU where Dumbledore’s Army uses the Chamber of Secrets instead of the Room of Requirement

Ultimate security as Harry is the only one capable of opening it. 

Myrtle proudly spending her time acting as a guard/lookout. 

Later, Harry diligently teaching Ron, Hermione, and a few choice others, like Neville, how to mimic parseltongue so that they can open it too. 

Muggleborns experiencing vicious satisfaction that they’re using this chamber as a place of education and defense, reclaiming the very space Slytherin built to rid the school of their presence. 

Hermione methodically dismantling the basilisk’s corpse, covertly selling the priceless ingredients to potion masters, using the funds to continue their work - buying books and battle robes and new wands for those who can’t afford it. 

(Hermione saving a portion of those ingredients for her own research, straightening in triumph when she learns what basilisk venom does to horcruxes, knowing she has vials of it hidden up in her room). 

Harry reverently adding the Chamber of Secrets to the Marauder’s Map, proudly continuing his family’s work and reveling in the difference they’re making. 

These students - these kids - choosing to train in a dark, horrifying place that was never meant for them. Learning spells amongst shadows, growing stronger in inches of murky water, the smell of a decomposing corpse in their noses, memories of all that had happened here haunting them. They know this is what war is really like and it helps to push them forward.  

9 years ago

(I’m not getting it because it’s her style, just because I like it.)(Not that there’s anything wrong with getting your hair cut specifically to look like a celebrity.)

How should I get my hair cut? send me suggestions!

9 years ago

PSA for everyone seeing civil war early: PLEASE DO NOT SPOIL CIVIL WAR FOR ANYONE!!!!! If not for their sake, for your own, because if you start spreading civil war spoilers on this website you will most likely not survive the experience.


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7 years ago

Too Like the Lightning is now out free as an ebook for the next three days (ends midnight, March 23rd) through Tor! So if you’re curious what all this is about, (like me) picked up a physical copy but would still like to have an ebook, or for any other reason want a free ebook, check it out!

Edit: link.


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8 years ago

Does it bother anyone else that there are parts of your life you don’t remember? You have done and said things that you don’t even know about anymore. That means you don’t even have the right perception of yourself because you don’t even fully know who you are. However, something that you’ve forgotten about could be a prominent memory in somebody else’s mind. It trips me out.


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mjollydragon - Insert Witty Comment Here
Insert Witty Comment Here

Officially the world's fakest adult.

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