TW Saeyoung Walking In On You C//ting
TW Saeyoung walking in on you c//ting
~Post type: Short story~
Author’s Note: Please be safe, this story includes mentions of Self Harm, blood and possible depression.
Please do not read if any of those topics are upsetting or triggering <3
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You promised yourself you wouldn't do this anymore
You promised. But yet, you couldn't stop yourself. One moment you were brushing your teeth and getting ready for bed and the next you were reaching into the all too familiar tin in the back of the bathroom cabinet. You stopped yourself for a second; what would you say if anyone saw you right now? They'd probably ask you why.
Why? You didn't know. It was just.. Something you did sometimes. You just needed the slicing pain to know you could still feel pain. Almost as if you needed to remember there wasn't just happiness in life. But no, that wasn't it. It was because you felt deep down that you didn't deserve the happiness. You took out one of the thin razor blades and placed it against your thigh, just high enough to be unnoticeable unless you were naked. You took a deep breath, closed your eyes and sliced. You hissed and went in again, slightly higher this time. Two was enough, you told yourself. You rinsed the blade and placed it back in the tin, tucking it away back in the cabinet. Just as you were grabbing a cloth to clean up the thin lines, now with beads of blood popping up and trailing down, you heard a knock at the door. "Honey, you've been in there for a while," You heard Saeyoung say through the bathroom door. "Are you getting dressed all nice just to sleep? Or did you have something else in mind?" He was teasing. "Oh, um no I-I'm okay. I'm just... Cleaning up." You stammered, trying to stop the bleeding, but the beads kept returning. "...I'm going to come in, is that okay?" He said, a serious tone in his voice. "Um, just-" You tried to say, holding the cloth under cold water, trying to wash off the blood and use the cold to stop the bleeding. You looked over at the door, noticing you forgot to lock it. Just as you were about to reach for the knob, the door slowly swung open. Guiltily, you pulled up your pajama bottoms and held the cloth behind your back. "Hi." You said, cheeks flushed and hands behind your back. You were sure you looked guilty, but you still tried to act normal. "Honey, what happened? Are you okay?" He said, cupping a warm hand against your cheek. "Um I..." You started. He kissed your forehead, and seemed to spot the cloth behind your back. "MC," He said, gently reaching for the cloth. He rarely ever called you by your name, only reserved for serious conversations. You didn't fight him, and handed it over. "What happened?" He was calm, but you could tell in his eyes that he was worried. "I... I'm sorry." Was all you could muster. You started tearing up. "I'm so sorry, Sae." "Hey. Come here." He wrapped you in a hug. You laid your head on his chest and could hear his heart drumming away in his chest while his shirt was getting more and more wet with your tears. He tossed the cloth in the sink and held you, both tightly and gently. "I'm sorry. I wasn't going to do it, but it was habit, and- And I just wasn't strong enough not to. I'm so sorry." You sobbed, grabbing the back of his shirt. He could figure it out from your ramblings what had happened. "It's okay honey, you're okay." He stroked your hair, and slightly rocked side to side, holding you close. "Do you need to be cleaned up?" "I don't know, that's what I was doing when you came in but..." You said, sniffling and trying to calm down. "Okay, hold on for a second," He bent down, and lifted you up, placing you gently on the small counter behind you. He placed a soft kiss on your lips, and tucked your hair behind your ear. "While I clean you up can we talk for a bit?" He talked quietly. "Yeah." You said, taking a deep breath. "Okay, where is it?" You wiggled your bottoms down, so he could see the- still bleeding- cuts. You turned away, ashamed at the wounds. "So," He started, grabbing the cloth and wringing it out so it was only damp. "What happened, My Love?" "I just felt a random urge and I figured I'd done it before without getting caught... I told myself just this once and then never again." You said, turning your head to look at him. He gently wiped the cuts and the blood around them. "Tell me if I'm hurting you, okay?" He said, rinsing the cloth and wiping your legs again. "Okay...” He nodded, urging you to continue.
“Anyways, I figured I needed to." You closed your eyes, not able to meet his. "You needed to? Why did you need to, baby?" "I needed to remind myself that there's more than just happiness in life." You felt ashamed to admit it, feeling your eyes filling again. "Can you look at me for a second?" He said, placing the cloth over both wounds and pressing it firmly. You opened your eyes, and tried to blink away your tears. "You're right. There are things other than happiness and love in life." He smiled, bitter-sweetly. "But that doesn't mean you have to feel all of it. I told you before and I'll say it again, I don't ever want to let you be in pain. Especially not because of me. When we first met, you told me that you wouldn't be in danger because of me. Do you remember that?" You nodded. "So, I don't want you to feel like the love that I give you needs to be evened out with pain, okay?" He kissed your cheek and wiped your tears. "Okay." He picked the cloth up off of your leg and grabbed bandages from the cabinet. You spotted the tin at the same time he did. You looked away in shame. You heard the rattling of the tin and the small bandage box. You looked back at him, his hands holding only the bandage box. He carefully unwrapped a few and gently placed hem on your leg. You noticed his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth, as he always does when he's focusing. After he placed the bandages, he lightly fluttered kisses around your wounds. When he placed the box back in the cabinet you noticed the tin was gone, but you didn't see where he'd moved it to. He helped you pull your bottoms back up and wriggle off the counter. "Are you feeling better?" He said, lifting you in his arms. You wrapped your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist. Nuzzling your head in the crook of his neck, you nodded. "Good." He carried you back to your shared room and placed you carefully on the bed. "I'll be right back, okay?" He said, kissing your forehead and stepping away from the bed. You almost asked him what he was going to do or begged him to stay next to you. But you were too tired to press, and you figured you knew what he was doing anyway from the way his pocket rattled. You could just wait for him with your eyes shut. After a few minutes, you stirred back awake to feel the bed dip. "Sorry to wake you up." He said softly. You just turned to face him and nuzzled in closer. "S'Okay." You hummed. "I love..Sae.." You said, drifting back to sleep. "I love you too, Honey."
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!!IMPORTANT!!
I know this is normally the first time I am actually kind of mad at this kind of shit. But I just had to let it out for now
Listen. About the NSFW requests people request in other writers inboxes such as @ensemblestarscafe receiving 2 NSFW requests from one or two anons. Normally we assumed that it was a troller. Now trollers who do this kind of shit let me say this. People aren’t going to think this is funny because they have things they are for sure uncomfortable with. And it sickens me to see people think this kind of shit is funny without even knowing the person itself. Anons who dont read the writers rules. I would suggest reading the rules NOW, because we writers are not going to be writing everything you want, because we have FEELINGS and we are HUMANS. Not to mention we have our RIGHTS to deny the request. I am pretty sure the other people who have spoken themselves said this many times. I assure you we will NOT repeat it once more. Once again, ONE LAST TIME. We writers are HUMANS. Not robots. Nothing that is inhuman. We are humans, that means we have our own feelings and thoughts. Keep in mind the people who have their own blog. It is their OWN blog not yours. I would prefer not to treat them like they serve you. I just wanted to spill this out because I am tired and angry of this kind of shit that people think its so funny but no it isnt because people have their own things that they are comfortable with and not comfortable with.
Thank you for listening.
- Akari ~ <3
Honestly, Mystic Messenger deserves kudos for how unique it was. I really can't think of another dating sim with the overall vibe of MM, nothing compares. Like, the dynamics between love interests first of all isn't jam packed with cheap drama. When you read the conversations between them, you can actually believe that these people are friends and get along with each other. You can sense that they've known each other for a very long time, you sense the trust and the deep bonds more and more as you progress through the story.
Not only that, but the love interests are unique as well. Any dating sim fan can tell you all about the various tropes that our love interests embody, but I feel like MM is the only sim that actually has a unique take on them. Like yes, Jumin is the overbearing rich CEO who's into BDSM and wants to own you like he owns everything else, but going through his story you truly see a side to him that feels so gratifying to learn about in the format of MM. His conflict with his dad is unique to the core- his dad isn't abusive, not to Jumin. On the contrary, Jumin holds nothing but warm praise for his father consistently and you can tell that aside from the womanizing, they have quite a good relationship! But you see Jumin's emotions change real time, how he slowly breaks down until he can't stand it anymore. How he just needs someone to comfort and understand him in his lonely world, someone who isn't a cat or his friends that don't know how to act when Jumin's collected demeanor falls apart.
Or Zen, the classic narcissist flirt, who isn't at all. You really get to see where his narcissism comes from, how he copes with being an actor, how he learns to let down his walls and let people in all the while his sweet personality coming through.
Just. Ugh. Mystic Messenger.
Do you guys remember that post that was like "if someone says I beg your pardon, assert your dominance by responding 'then beg'."?
I feel like if you were to do that to Byakuya, he'd absolutely lose it. Like he'd just want a simple repeating of what you said before, to be absolutely destroyed with "then beg." And if youre feeling cocky and daring, you could even add a "peasant" to the end.
Like this:
You finished your statement, though Byakuya had only half-heard what you said. He stood silent for a second, brows furrowed together.
"I beg your pardon..?" He slightly shook his head and questioned.
You smirked, knowing he'd just given you so much power in his own words. You felt daring today, and you would take the risk. You looked him right in the eyes, and muttered two simple, yet now powerful, words.
"Then beg." You evilly stated. You knew he'd be taken aback, and probably angry, by that but you couldnt pass up such an opportunity.
"Wh-" His eyes widened, in shock. How dare someone such as yourself talk to him that way? Though he was a little impressed at your confidence, knowing full-well he wouldn't enjoy being made a fool of.
Not tagged either, but this looks cute!
love at first sight or slowly growing fond of someone? | love letters or mixtapes? | hand kisses or kisses on the cheeks? |understanding each other without words or finishing each others sentences? | gazing into each other’s eyes or looking away blushing? (I can't decide!) | longing to be with someone again or spending every second together? | laughing together or crying together? | someone run their fingers through your hair or gently playing with your hand? | surprise kisses or long tight hugs?
No pressure tags: @achilles-writing-corner @s-serendipit-y @plushey @danganimagines And anyone else too :)
no one tagged me (surprise shawty!) but here we go!
love at first sight or slowly growing fond of someone? | love letters or mixtapes? | hand kisses or kisses on the cheeks? | understanding each other without words or finishing each others sentences? | gazing into each other’s eyes or looking away blushing? | longing to be with someone again or spending every second together? | laughing together or crying together? | someone run their fingers through your hair or gently playing with your hand? (stop i couldn’t choose ONE!) | surprise kisses or long tight hugs?
no pressure taggies: @anchoeritic @anywherebuthere @amixedwitch @widowdays @gryffindors-weasley @sunflowerdarlingx @acosmis-t @randomoutsiders and anyone who wants to, tagged or not x
heyy can i get some clingy shuichi hcs or just fluff in general anything shuichi i will consume
Of course!! I love our clingy detective!
The Nagito playlist I created was literally MADE for this moment
Wires - The Neighbourhood
Blow my brains out - Tikkle Me
Choke - I Dont Know How But They Found Me
Sarcasm - Get scared
Die Happy - Dreamers
Hope - Jack Stauber (ofc)
Forest - Twenty One Pilots
Sad Song - Scotty Sire
Meant to be yours - Ryan McCartan, Barrett Wilbert Weed
No Children - The Mountain Goats
(Sorry for the music spam lol)
i need some new songs. send me stuff that reminds you of nagito please lolol. Line Without a Hook is my big nagito vibe tbh, a very good song
Some might say it's foreshadowing, I say it's the fact that he needs validation and needs to feel seen so he drops so many 'hints' about his life.
Saeyoung:
I’m so mysterious nobody knows anything about me
Also saeyoung:
literally has a username titled “Hacker God”
It is a known fact by the entirety of the RFA that he hacks shit for a living when he could easily pretend he has a regular (((legal))) IT job but noooo
Claims everything to do w his job is a secret but will constantly drop hints about how dangerous it is and will even go into story tangents about his various adventures whenever he feels like it
Talks about a hacker group that constantly chases him, making it very clear that he does ILLEGAL SHIT
Hell even invites them to the party
Openly only uses cash
Speaking of cash, makes a shitton of it somehow
Again, he openly admits he’s a hacker!!! Hackers don’t do that!!! They say they’re a techie for some random firm, or something else entirely!!!! They’re not this open!!! If saeyoung were really so secretive, only V would know mfs a hacker and everyone else would think he works at some start up or something
Makes it very clear hes not in a normal work environment? Pls it screams “illegal secret agency” omg
Admitted to running away from home and having a brother the moment someone asked him
Will tell you his thinly veiled allegorical dreams about his origin story whenever he feels like it (mother cat and brother cat dream, the pirate ship and planet one, etc.)
“Why didn’t you feed us, mother cat? Oh well, if it weren’t for that, I wouldn’t have gone on so many adventures” pls
After playing all the routes leading up to his, the only surprise in his backstory would probably be the prime minister thing and his name tbh
It should 100% be illegal for companies to make you give them your payment information when you sign up for a free trial version of their product. It is not necessary and there is no good fucking reason for them to do it. It’s blatantly just so they can steal forgetful customers’ money.
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